Light from the moon cast a geometrical pattern onto the floor as it shines through the bars of the cell. Against the back corner, where the pale blue light can't reach me, I try to sleep, however impossible it is with the constant chiming of the bells. Off in the distance they mark my death, with each hour past another one rings off into the night. They started at midnight and will end at an hour past midday, at that time I will be executed.
Ding
It does no good to think of my past now, although it looms in front of my face like an unavoidable accident. Whatever my reasons were for committing the 'crimes against humanity' that got me here, they seem small and pointless now. My life, whats left of it, seems small and pointless. Almost like a forgotten fantasy, not really having ever existed, but nonetheless a memory.
Ding
As I reflect on my life, all the pain, the triumph, the defeat and despair, I cry. A lone tear travels down my cheek and lands on my bare chest. I am a man awaiting death, marked, and chosen to die.
Ding
Sometimes life seems pointless, but in these last hours I have clarity. A clarity that I never had in life. Everything seems to stand out with a heightened brilliance. Ever grain of sand that compiles the solid brick walls that enclose me are like boulders, each one different in it's own special way. Every fiber of the soiled pants that cling to my frail frame seem to weave their way into an imperfect design. It's beautiful in a way and at the same time frightening.
Ding
My eyes close for just a second and I have a brief glimpse of pure darkness, but I cannot look. Beneath it all, I am a scared man, frightened and shamed. I have no one, I am lost and God knows I will be lost in death as well.
Ding
I nearly jump as the fifth bell sounds, that leaves me with eight more hours. Eight. More. Hours. That's it. My chest feels heavy and with each breath I know that the time is close. Impending doom encircles me, laughing. Screaming my name, telling me to just end it myself, do it. Do it now!
Ding
However so distant from this existence, suicide is not an option. Even if I wanted it, there is no way to do it in this cell. They have left me here, with no toilet to drown myself and no sheets to hang myself. I am alone with my putrid thoughts, the ones that got me here in the first place. How could I have neglected to see the big picture, all my struggles, everything I Lived for was for nothing.
Ding
I have seen my last sunrise. I hardly even noticed.
Ding
Ding
Ding
Ding
Ding
The hours pass like minutes now and the sun is almost at it's highest point in the sky. And as a rusty key turns in the lock, I am no longer a prisoner, because soon I know I will be released
Ding