Vulgarities and offensive language

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Brovo

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This is spawned off of @Minerva 's thread about common words people don't like using. It kept getting brought up, so to avoid further derailment, I moved the discussion here for those who wish to have it.

Please play nice. The staff have much better things to do than to stare at people wanking about their linguistic superiority because they don't use one word or another. Focus on the topic, don't attack each other personally, and we should all be cool. :ferret:

I'll crack things off with a response I had to someone else, who is obviously particularly verbose. (That is a compliment.)
The word "very" is actually just one of those English words which seems like a basic filler word but actually has meaning. It actually comes from the Latin word "verus", which means "true", and has the same roots as "verification" - to verify is to give proof, to prove true, usually of a person's identity or opinion. The word "very" should mean "truly". To call someone very beautiful should mean they are truly beautiful, it's supposed to show either honesty or verification of the speaker's opinion. Of course, over time, the word has been used so much that nobody really thinks about its original meaning, and has now come to simply give emphasis to a word and seems like an incredibly bland or lazy word, which isn't helped by the fact that it is always used sarcastically too, but it is one of the more honest words of the English language in my opinion.

The word I hate the most is "faggot". It is such a disgusting, vile word, and anyone who uses it instantly disgusts me. If I were to have a partner who used this word in a serious context, I would seriously consider ending the relationship. My second cousin once visited my house and called one of my first cousins a faggot and I slapped him right there and then. We haven't spoken since. I do feel bad, it was impulsive, but I stand by my actions. I can slightly tolerate the usage of the word amongst people who are close friends and use it jokingly, or even lovingly (if that's even possible) - for example I am friends with a gay couple and one of them call the other a faggot as a joke now and again - but I still cringe when I hear it. The only time I will use the word is when I'm stating how much I hate it, like now, or when I'm playing a character in a roleplay to whom usage of that word is realistic / believable.
Yes, "very" did used to mean something different than its modern incarnation. However, if we're going with "common words you don't like" I picked words which had a different meaning in conversation than they have in the dictionary. Same as "privilege" or "offended" used to be fairly innocuous statements that, thanks to modern politics, are now loaded words.

The word "faggot" used to mean a bundle of sticks. In Britain, it is slang for a cigarette. Britain also uses the word for a type of food. "I am going to cook a faggot" is a legitimately inoffensive term in Britain, as it likely refers to the food item and not the North American slang for male gays.

Anywho, time to throw in my two pence about vulgarities in general.

Vulgarities woo!
#1: Vulgarities are ordinarily the language of the proletariat. The reason vulgarities are looked down on by society is because the high brow constantly try to find ways to appear and behave more civilized, or more appropriate than their more impoverished, commoner peers. Those that aspire toward the likeness of the wealthy and celebrities, ape and imitate them--which is why fashion constantly evolves, and why slang words are frowned upon in more... Upper class company. It's all a game of catch-up starring the rich who want to be unique, and the poor who want to be just like the rich.

#2: Vulgarities will always exist because language constantly evolves to provide them. Alternative meanings to words constantly appear--like "faggot" for instance. Even if you were to successfully eliminate words like fuck, shit, faggot, cunt, pussy, dick, asshole, and so on, new words would take their place. The advent of the Internet for instance also brought about language filters--so that if you're playing an online game, your opponent can't call you a fucking cunt. Instead he calls you a ******* ****. So the Internet invented new slang to insult people with, like "cuck" or "noob" or so on.

A particularly vicious example is Jaywalker. Jaywalker has no offensive connotation today, but back in the day when it was coined, a "Jay" was a racial slang term primarily oriented toward people of Romanian, Hungarian, Polish, Austrian, and Albanian descent. If we made up the term today, it would be the equivalent of saying "niggerwalker" or "pakiwalker" or something equally grotesque.

The best way to handle these words is simply to understand the environment you're in. Don't use them in places like high brow culture or academia, but using them in places like among friends is usually fine--so long as your friend is okay with it. Use vulgarities to draw particularly special attention to something--they're expletives, after all.

Ex: I injured myself.
Ex2: I fucking hurt myself.
 
At that point though you're tackling a false problem. It's not the words that are the issue but the meaning/intention behind those words. Telling someone "Don't swear" isn't going to fix what you're describing.

And this part is a bit derailing, so if we continue past this post I'll make a new thread. But saying "X should be stopped because people don't like it" is frankly speaking a horrible way to operate. You're basically teaching people that when you have a problem that you should expect society to fix it for you rather than taking the effort to fix it yourself and improve as an individual.

I'm not necessarily saying don't swear. I was just giving my opinion on that one statement you made (and I probably shouldn't have). Of course, it's not going to fix anything alone. I'm just trying to explain my logic why parents can't make one statement in regards to behavior but practice the opposite. And apparently I'm doing a terrible job XD I give you brownie points because at least you're not being a hypocrite towards your cousins~

Sincere apologies for the near derail. I'm just a massive psychologist/researcher/analyst.

(Btw please don't make a third topic. Lol.)
 
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I have a filthy mouth tbh, though I never realized quite how much I swore until I started playing Flight Rising and any time I try to make a thread I get starred out. Idk, I'm perfectly capable of expressing myself without it, but I find curse words colourful and cathartic. Sometimes you just need to describe something as 'fucking awesome' instead of just 'neat,' or say 'ugh I'm tired of this shit' instead of 'I wish this would stop happening.'
 
I'm just trying to explain my logic why parents can't make one statement in regards to behavior but practice the opposite.
I do agree with this, parents should be able to do what they preach.
Unless if they're preaching something like "Gays should be burned", then I'm very much ok with them only barking.
(Btw please don't make a third topic. Lol.)
We could skip straight to a 4th Topic. :P
 
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But you can't expect your child to be better than you if you're not setting a good example for them. That's the point I'm trying to make. For instance, if I was 15 years old and my mom or dad told me I better not have sex even though they bring various "partners" in all the time, do you think I'm gonna take him/her seriously? I'm not sure if I explained my train of thought well enough or not....My apologies if I'm not making sense. Lol.
Oh, how I suffer from this!

My parents used to swear all the time yet always called me out for it. I tried to contain myself around them, but sometimes swearing just slipped out accidentally. Now, I've forced them to accept that swearing is just as significant a part in my life now as they are! Also, a couple years ago, my mum used to sneak her secret boyfriend home every now and again in the middle of the night, and when I confronted her about it a while later, I told her that she didn't have to try and tiptoe around me and that I was happy for her to bring him back earlier if it meant that I wouldn't be woken up so abruptly in the night. Not even a month after we had that conversation, I brought home a male friend - not a boyfriend or even a friend who I had ever considered as a potential partner - and when she came home, she immediately flipped and ranted at me about bringing boys to the house behind her back! The cheek!
 
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To be fair, I often use british slang swears because I like them more.

Plonker, Pillock, Knobhead, bollocks, Wanker, Twat, Faff Arse, etc.

more fun imo :D.
 
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I cuss like a sailor, I won't even lie about it. When I'm pissed off, you'll hear the f bomb dropped more than any other word, and I have no problems at all saying anything that will offend someone if they're the target of my anger. I do try to censor myself when I'm around people I don't know, and if there are kids other than the ones I spawned running around my house. But my house is MY house. I will say whatever I damn well please and if people don't like it there is nothing stopping them from using the door. In public, I try not to act like there's a filter between my brain and my mouth though. Some people are easily offended and that just irritates me. They're only words. It's not like I'm swinging my fist around....
 
'Cunt' is used as a greeting amongst friends round some parts of this country.

So yeah, it's safe to say that Scottish folk don't give a shit about swearing.
 
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I used to swear a decent amount, around high school age, because it was fun and cool.
It feels somehow impolite to swear around my mother still and I only do it on very rare occasions or when I'm quoting something. My mother also swears on approximately the same basis.

I still swear sometimes, especially when I get flustered or angry (and dropping/breaking/spilling something will almost always elicit a frustrated "motherfucker" whether I mean to or not) but I really tamped it down after high school. I realized that, in most situations, I want to present my best side and explain myself to the best of my abilities, put my best foot forward, etc. In casual situations when I'm comfortable, I'm likely to swear a bit but overall, I prefer not to. I don't especially mind when others swear (unless it's directed toward me) though.
 
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'Cunt' is used as a greeting amongst friends round some parts of this country.

So yeah, it's safe to say that Scottish folk don't give a shit about swearing.
Oi', you fuckin' cheeky cunt. When are you going to upload your next YouTube video? I like them.
 
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Believe it or not, I've got one in the works just now on the Battle of Falkirk. Unfortunately, new job makes it hard to get shit done on a regular basis.
 
Believe it or not, I've got one in the works just now on the Battle of Falkirk. Unfortunately, new job makes it hard to get shit done on a regular basis.
All is good. Take your time. I just saw an excuse to call you a cunt and I took it.

... Though I'll be glad to see it go up when it's ready. :ferret:
 
Is using the word 'bloody' considered cussing? ^_^' I tend to use that a whole lot.
 
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Is using the word 'bloody' considered cussing? ^_^' I tend to use that a whole lot.
It isn't considered as swearing, even here in the UK, but it's one of those words like "damn" that parents, particularly religious ones, sometimes scold their younger children for saying. It's mainly because the words are used almost solely with negative connotations. It's also why children, especially here in the UK, often reach the age of seven or eight thinking "stupid" and "idiot" are swear words as well.

I've always liked the word "bastard", because it's one of those swear words you can get away with if you use correctly. I was always scolded for saying "bitch" by my parents - even in reference to a female dog, even when discussing the gender of the direwolf, Lady, in Game of Thrones - yet I can get away with bastard because that's the way my parents made me. As I often tell them. Frequently tell them.
 
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I fucking swear in every fucking sentence that I fucking say in real fucking life : |
 
I was always scolded for saying "bitch" by my parents - even in reference to a female dog, even when discussing the gender of the direwolf, Lady, in Game of Thrones - yet I can get away with bastard because that's the way my parents made me. As I often tell them. Frequently tell them.
Or in reference to the Bastard Bowl. :P
 
I have a difficult time comprehending why vulgarity is such a big deal in general. I mean sure, you can associate it with civility, up until mister fucking high society screws you out of a job plainly out of spite despite never dropping his civilised bullshit act. Not cursing doesn't make you a better person and everyone who thinks it does is, broad strokes incoming, probably a fucking asshole.

Vulgarities are a relatively harmless way of expressing something we all feel. These words have as much power over you as you allow them to have. Save some deep-rooted association psychological issues, but the exception makes the rule aside, people often need to express anger and if they do so in a way that is as relatively harmless as cussing or going to town on a punching bag, who gives a fuck they're using bad words or violence to unwind?

I think people should be defined by their actions, more than the words they choose.
 
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