- Invitation Status
- Preferred Character Gender
- Genres
- Fantasy is number one. Steampunk, sci-fi, alternate history, and everything else that isn't boringly realistic are also fine by me.
There are a growing number of people in leading nations of the world who are choosing to delay having children, or even to not have them at all. Between lengthy secondary education, time-consuming careers, and a general change in attitudes, marriage & children are much lower on our totem poles than they were in our parents' or grandparents' generations.
Childfreedom, however, is a difficult issue to discuss. Of the three main ways of preventing children (contraception, abortion, and sterilization) all three are controversial, with two out of three practically unobtainable in many parts of the world. One of the least discussed issues is sterilization.
While vasectomies for men are relatively risk-free and inexpensive, they are uncommon. For women they are neither cheap nor easy, and furthermore, a huge number of doctors refuse to perform the procedure on young, childless women, whereas young, childless men can easily get one. Most doctors refuse to tie the tubes of a woman until she is at least 35.
Personally, I find that absolutely terrifying. If I were to wait until I'm thirty five to get "fixed", I'd have been sexually active for two whole decades. My mother had the same issue- she had me by accident when she was 36 because her doctors refused to tie her tubes, and she had recently switched birth control when I was conceived. Literally a few weeks after my birth, the same doctor that refused to tie her tubes performed the procedure. It was a useless gesture; due to a rare blood incompatibility she cannot have another child with my father anyway.
My parents and I have a very happy life and she's never regretted having me, but I'm still terrified of winding up like her. I hate children like certain people hate spiders. I recognize on an intellectual level that they can be beneficial are are normal, but on an emotional level they're all slimy grotch-goblins to me. I don't want to be in the same room as one. Watching toddlers eat makes me physically ill; I can't sit in the same restaurant as a group of children. I break out in psychosomatic hives when I hear an infant crying. I just hate children.
I'll be turning seventeen in three days. As far as I'm concerned, getting my tubes tied would be a great birthday present. My mother agrees, but finding a health care provider that also agrees would be a meaningless gesture. I'll most likely start looking for a willing doctor as soon as I turn eighteen, but I don't have high hopes.
Without insurance, my prescription for Seasonique costs me around a dollar a day. There are other benefits to the hormonal birth control (PMS symptom reduction, 4 periods a year, low sex drive, no acne...) but I'd still trade it in a heartbeat. I'm always terrified that the one pill I missed two months ago will result in a pregnancy when I finally get a chance to go to Hawaii and see my bf. He's a fellow child hater, and generally wears a condom for extra prevention. I still worry that it won't be enough. If my period is a day late, I flip shit.
Honestly this is just something I'm sick and tired of worrying about. I don't want to sacrifice my sex life, scarce though it is, and there isn't any reason for me to change my opinion concerning children. I'll most likely start my search for a doctor willing to sterilize me as soon as I decide on a college. Really, I just wish there was an easier solution- cheaper, lower risk, and commonplace. :c
What do y'all think?
Childfreedom, however, is a difficult issue to discuss. Of the three main ways of preventing children (contraception, abortion, and sterilization) all three are controversial, with two out of three practically unobtainable in many parts of the world. One of the least discussed issues is sterilization.
While vasectomies for men are relatively risk-free and inexpensive, they are uncommon. For women they are neither cheap nor easy, and furthermore, a huge number of doctors refuse to perform the procedure on young, childless women, whereas young, childless men can easily get one. Most doctors refuse to tie the tubes of a woman until she is at least 35.
Personally, I find that absolutely terrifying. If I were to wait until I'm thirty five to get "fixed", I'd have been sexually active for two whole decades. My mother had the same issue- she had me by accident when she was 36 because her doctors refused to tie her tubes, and she had recently switched birth control when I was conceived. Literally a few weeks after my birth, the same doctor that refused to tie her tubes performed the procedure. It was a useless gesture; due to a rare blood incompatibility she cannot have another child with my father anyway.
My parents and I have a very happy life and she's never regretted having me, but I'm still terrified of winding up like her. I hate children like certain people hate spiders. I recognize on an intellectual level that they can be beneficial are are normal, but on an emotional level they're all slimy grotch-goblins to me. I don't want to be in the same room as one. Watching toddlers eat makes me physically ill; I can't sit in the same restaurant as a group of children. I break out in psychosomatic hives when I hear an infant crying. I just hate children.
I'll be turning seventeen in three days. As far as I'm concerned, getting my tubes tied would be a great birthday present. My mother agrees, but finding a health care provider that also agrees would be a meaningless gesture. I'll most likely start looking for a willing doctor as soon as I turn eighteen, but I don't have high hopes.
Without insurance, my prescription for Seasonique costs me around a dollar a day. There are other benefits to the hormonal birth control (PMS symptom reduction, 4 periods a year, low sex drive, no acne...) but I'd still trade it in a heartbeat. I'm always terrified that the one pill I missed two months ago will result in a pregnancy when I finally get a chance to go to Hawaii and see my bf. He's a fellow child hater, and generally wears a condom for extra prevention. I still worry that it won't be enough. If my period is a day late, I flip shit.
Honestly this is just something I'm sick and tired of worrying about. I don't want to sacrifice my sex life, scarce though it is, and there isn't any reason for me to change my opinion concerning children. I'll most likely start my search for a doctor willing to sterilize me as soon as I decide on a college. Really, I just wish there was an easier solution- cheaper, lower risk, and commonplace. :c
What do y'all think?
