TSA Patdowns

Blind Hemingway

Ancient Iwaku Scum from 2006.
Original poster
MYTHICAL MEMBER
Posting Speed
  1. Slow As Molasses
Online Availability
NEVER
Writing Levels
  1. Adept
  2. Douche
Preferred Character Gender
  1. Primarily Prefer Female
Genres
Surrealism, Surreal Horror (Think Tim Burton), Steampunk, Sci-Fi Fantasy, Spaghetti Westerns, Mercenaries, Dieselpunk, Cyberpunk, Historical fantasies
In light of the all the dumb patdowns that the US government is forcing people to go through.

I'm still wearing a kilt traditionally.
 
I'm going to put a bomb in my arse to see if they can find it.
 
70142d0f-a41d-4e9f-9c87-047f590c0136.jpg
 
How's the ass bomb coming along?
 
So a lighter and a fart take that long to figure out how to use?
 
At least the TSA pat-downs haven't been applied to conventions yet.

As far as I know.

Oh the stories that would be told. . .
 
I can imagine, all the morbidly obese animu woman-things wearing outfits so skimpy the sheer sight of which would make Slaanesh celibate.

*Pukes at self induced mental images*
 
I don't what the hell a Slaanesh is but I concur.
 
I used to work for CATSA (the Canadian equivalent of the TSA), and let me tell you that it sucks even more being the person doing patdowns than the person being patted down. Up here we aren't legally allowed to search private areas, and if we have a valid reason to do so we have to call the cops and take the passenger to a private room where the cops perform the search. As a passenger, it sucks going through security. I know, I used to travel all the time when I was younger. I hated waiting in line and I hated having to get a pat down when I knew I wasn't carrying anything on me.

But you have to see it from airport security's perspective too. I have never been treated as badly in my entire life as I did when I worked airport security. People are constantly rude, think they know better than you do and treat you like you are a fucking retard (I worked there after having graduated university while I was trying to decide if I should continue in my field or try and find a different profession). We don't make the rules but we do have to do our job. Bitching at the person checking your bag, wanding you or patting you down isn't the right way to go about things, it's just going to put them in a bad mood and they're going to start acting like dicks. For example, I can do a thorough and gentle pat down in roughly 30-45 seconds, and if the person I'm patting down is nice I'll go as quickly as I can so they can be on their way. If the person is being a douchecanoe, I'll take a couple of minutes and be a bit more rough. I didn't necessarily enjoy doing it, but it made me feel better so that I wasn't in a bad mood all day long and dwelling on how big of a douche that person had been. Even then, I would always be cracking jokes with my coworkers and passengers, mostly because I'm really silly but also because it would put people in better moods.

That said, I don't agree with the TSA and US government making people go through those kinds of patdowns. That is just downright disgraceful, embarrassing and a violation of people's rights.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=z7AWw7t5zj0
 
He makes Rule 34 look like Sesame street by comparison
 
So yeah... I've always found that when going home on leave I get treated worse by the TSA when they find out I'm Army. Regardless I try and be polite.

On the other hand security is now screening pilots? I mean what is the point... they can just as easily knock out their co-pilot and crassh the plane manually. Not to mention Deployments? Funny how they are worried about us at all, seeing as they take nail clippers while we still have our rifles with us.
 
:I

You don't even get patted down in smaller airports. You only get the standard patdown if you refuse to go through the x-ray machines that are only in place at large hub airports. You also get patted down when you KEEP SETTING OFF THE FUCKING METAL DETECTOR. Seriously. You're given like, 2-3 chances to divest your metallic items.

Why do people even CARRY a lot of this stuff with them while they're travelling? I mean it just gets goddamn ridiculous.


Also, I'm pretty certain that flight crew DON'T get searched...

Some military personel are also exempt from some standards that regular civilians have to abide by.
 
:I

You don't even get patted down in smaller airports. You only get the standard patdown if you refuse to go through the x-ray machines that are only in place at large hub airports. You also get patted down when you KEEP SETTING OFF THE FUCKING METAL DETECTOR. Seriously. You're given like, 2-3 chances to divest your metallic items.

Why do people even CARRY a lot of this stuff with them while they're travelling? I mean it just gets goddamn ridiculous.


Also, I'm pretty certain that flight crew DON'T get searched...

Some military personel are also exempt from some standards that regular civilians have to abide by.

I don't have experience with how things work down in the States, but up here in Canada you walk through the metal detector. Don't set it off and you might get selected for a random pat down. Set if off and you get wanded, and won't get selected for a random pat down, or really be patted down in general.

As far as flight crew are concerned, I think about 95% of flight crews get searched. At least if they were flying internationally or in to the US they all got searched. Domestically I'm not certain.
 
Some military personel are also exempt from some standards that regular civilians have to abide by.

I've been patted down everytime I've flown, even when in uniform.