To Mend a Broken Heart

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Ryah slept fitfully. She was vaguely aware of someone holding her and movement as Aztrex ran with her in his arms. The movement further lulled her into sleep. Sometime during the running she would move her muzzle into the crook of his arm, enveloping herself in his scent. She felt herself being laid somewhere soft, a bed. She was too far gone to feel him taking the bullet out or to feel him stitching her arm together. But afterwards she seemed to really fall asleep.

She woke up, naked in her human form and immediately assumed the worse. She was in someone else's bed with her last memory of being in a cage. Had she been raped? Was she back at the temple? No wait, there was something. A memory of something....big and fierce. A memory of a monster. No, not a monster. He'd saved her this....beast. He'd looked vaguely familiar, but she knew that scent. She was surrounded by it right now. Turning her gaze to the bed she noticed the hoodie and slipped it on. It was big on her, could easily be used as pajama which she was glad for since she had no underwear.

Ryah slid out of bed and leaned against the wall as a wave of nausea and dizziness hit her. Eventually, she stumbled out of the room on full alert. She still didn't know where she was even though her surroundings were vaguely familiar and the scent she all but knew. It wasn't until she stepped into living room and noticed Aztrex. Immediately, she winced as a surge of memories rushed forward. "You saved me." Was all she managed to say before she slid down onto a chair at the table and began to eat ravenously. No mind for manners or propriety when you've been starved and drugged to beyond recognition.

Once she'd eaten as much as she felt she could eat she pushed her plate away and laid her head on the table as she hugged herself. Being alone brought nothing but trouble. She'd asked Aztrex to let her stay here before and he'd refused her before but now she would beg him. Anything to keep her out of the cages and the cold and darkness and drugs and sex. She didn't want it. She felt safe here. The creature from last night, the one that smelled like Az, he'd saved her. She felt safe with him. "I....I need somewhere to st-st-stay." She was still shaken up from last night, trembling and vulnerable. "They know.....they know where I live. N-not safe."
 
Soon after he had placed everything on the table, he heard rustling in his bedroom. He cocked his head, listening to see if she was awake. He heard more movement and then the sound of his hoodie being pulled on. So she had awoken. He glanced at his bedroom doorway when he heard her stumbling around and he wondered briefly if the drug hadn't worn off yet. It should have. He wasn't sure what was used on her, but from the sounds of what the man had said, it had started to wear off when he had found her. His hands clenched by his side at the rising anger when he thought about Ryah in that cage.He took a steady, calming breath and shook his head. Usually, his Beast was something relatively easy to keep down, but when he had recently released it, it became much harder to control it. It required a massive amount of concentration and calm, something he could generally only get when he was by himself. He wasn't sure how this was going to go for the next few hours.

Ryah came into view soon enough in his bedroom doorway and he looked over at her, studying her quietly. His hoodie swamped her body and she looked coherent, yet a little out of it. That was understandable. He stepped back from the table and cocked a brow when she said he saved her. He was quite disappointed that she remembered. He didn't want anyone remembering his Beast. It unsettled him knowing that someone knew a part of him he tried so desperately to hide.

Watching her, she stumbled over and slid into the chair in front of it before she ravenously dug in. He cared not for decorum at that moment and he went back to the kitchen and opened his fridge, looking around for something to drink. In the end, he went with water and he poured himself and Ryah a glass. He walked back over to the table just as Ryah finished eating and placed her head on the table and hugged herself. He stood there for a while, feeling quite awkward. But when she raised her head and started speaking, his shifted his weight, feeling uncertain. He gently placed the glass of water on the table in front of he and stepped back, taking a calming breath.

She wanted somewhere to stay? Not happening. Even after what happened, she wasn't staying here at night. Besides, he wasn't even staying here. He planned to leave. Find somewhere else. He had slaughtered so many people. They would find him soon enough if he stayed here. He was surprised he had managed to stay for as long as he had here without interruption. It had been a nice change of pace for him. To stay in one spot for quite a time. But now it was time to move on.

Aztrex glanced down at her, seeing how she trembled as she told him they knew where she lived, that it was no longer safe and he groaned, raking a hand through his hair again and messing it up so it stood in all directions. He tilted his head back and stared at the ceiling for a time before turning his attention back to her. "You can't stay here, Ryah," he told her, hesitating before he placed a hand on her uninjured shoulder. "There are reasons I don't let anyone stay with me. Not even Amnesia was allowed to," he grunted at the memory of her and then stepped back, away from Ryah.

"Besides," she started quietly, "I'm leaving. I can't stay here any longer," he glanced down at her momentarily before he turned and strode into his room, grabbing some of his bags and shoving clothes into them. Now his mind was made up, he planned to leave as soon as possible. Get away from this place. There were too many memories here anyway. Too many emotions he cared not to feel. Emotions meant dependence. Dependence meant trouble.
 
Leaving? Leaving where? He was her only friend, he couldn't leave. Already she could feel a panic attack begin to bubble up inside her but she shoved it down. Living by herself had almost gotten her killed she shuddered to think what would have happened if Aztrex hadn't come after her. Warily, she watched him step into his bedroom and for a brief moment she debated on whether to follow him or not. Well, regardless she was going with him. She had nowhere else to go and she couldn't go back home after what had happened.

Standing from the table she leaned against the doorway to his room, steading herself on the wooden frame. "Does the reason you don't want anyone staying with you involve how you were last night?" She wouldn't call it a beast, or a monster, it was none of those things when it had saved her. She paused and chose her next words carefully. "My dad....he was like you. He called it his Blood Form. I only saw it once but last night.....I mistook you for him." A part of her knew she should be very afraid of Blood Forms. But she'd never been hurt by one. Only protected.

As crazy as it was she felt safe with Aztrex even after knowing what happened to him, even if she didn't know everything. "I only saw my father's Blood Form once. He died protecting his family...in that form. My last memory of him was of him in his Blood Form. Instinctively, I knew I should've been afraid of him. But he was my daddy." This was the man who'd picked her up when she'd scraped her knees and had chased away her nightmares. "I should've run away from him but I ran towards him and my last memory is of him, those wild eyes, even though his anger and ferocity he held me in his arms." That was before she was so cruelly yanked from him and she watched him get his throat slit open. Her big, strong protector. Dead.

"I'm not afraid of it, Aztrex." Even though every part of her instincts screamed that she should be very afraid. She just find it hard to be when he had saved her. "Thats why I'm coming with you. No if's, and's, or but's about it. Besides, I know somewhere safe you can hide out in and I need someone to come with me to find answers." Ryah paused as she walked over and sat down on the bed rather stubbornly. "I'm sure in my wolf form I can fit in your bag or something. I'll leave you be." For the most part. "I can help if you'd let me, Aztrex."
 
When Ryah spoke, asking whether the reason he was leaving was because of last night, he froze, every muscle in his body going rigid. He slowly turned his gaze to look over at her where she stood in his doorway, leaning against the wooden frame. He suddenly felt like a deer in the headlights and at that very moment, he had a mix of two feelings; fear and rage. His Beast wanted to come forth and destroy those who knew of him. But Aztrex ground his teeth together as his nails sharpened into claws. But he clenched one of his hands, stabbing them into his palms to force himself to concentrate and force the Beast away.

He watched Ryah carefully, like a rabbit ready to bolt at any sudden movement. He wasn't used to anyone knowing any of his secrets. It frightened him. And yet, she soon told him her father had been the same. Aztrex paused, perplexed and he cocked his head, confused, suspicious and intrigued all at the same time. Blood Form? That's what her father called his? No, Aztrex preferred to call it his Beast. That's what it was. It was nothing more than a savage beast who's blood lust and rage controlled it.

Ryah soon explained what happened to her father and his brow furrowed. Her father was dead? Or was she taken away from him? Either way, he didn't like the sound of either option. That shouldn't happen to anyone, getting taken away from their parents. She told him how she had run to him instead of away and he had held her in his arms. Silly girl. She could've been killed. But then she told him she wasn't afraid of it and Aztrex flinched in surprise. There was no way she wasn't afraid of it. He was afraid of it.

Then Ryah told him she was coming with him and he frowned. "No way in hell," he told him firmly, watching as she went to sit on his bed, a stubborn expression on her face. Even if she said she knew somewhere safe, there was no way she was going with him. No. He did not want to hurt her. Hurt anyone. At her last words, his eyes widened and he dug his claws into his palms even further before he grit his teeth. "No, Ryah. I'm sorry, but you can not come with me. The Beast is not the reason why I do not allow people near me. He's dangerous, but controllable for the most part.. There are other reasons why I refuse to let people near me. Reasons I refuse to tell you. I'm unpredictable, dangerous, I could hurt anyone around me. And I do not plan to bear that responsibility like I do for Amnesia. Not again," he paused for a moment. That probably made it sound like he personally had hurt her. But it didn't matter. If she decided to spin the story in her head that she had hurt his mate, maybe she would decide to not come with him.

Shoving a few more articles of clothing in his bags, he groaned and zipped it up. Two back packs of clothes and he had two shoulder bags, which he grabbed and went and shoved a few things into. His first aid kit, tooth brush and toothpaste, other necessities and then went to his kitchen and quickly shoved non-perishable food into the bag. He might not eat properly, but he'd get hungry at some point. He slung the shoulder bags over each shoulder and then strode back to his room, glancing at Ryah before throwing one strap of the backpacks over each shoulder. Rolling his shoulders so the bags shifted into a more comfortable position, he looked at Ryah. "You're going to have to find someone else to help you. I am not the one to keep you safe. And I am beyond help," he told her.
 
Ryah would watch him pack up silently an utterly broken look on her face. "I don't have anyone else." She muttered softly. He wasn't her first choice but he was all she had. If Amnesia were alive she'd be begging her. If not then Tamar. She barely knew Aztrex and although he was practically telling her she should be very afraid of him, she couldn't find it in herself to be. She'd suffered too much in her life to risk being judgmental and afraid of everyone she met. She feared very few things. Many of those things were carried by naive humans...or done by them.

Aztrex had done nothing to make her fear him. Not once had he touched her in a way she didn't like or beat her or taken advantage of her or commanded her to do something. He hadn't cut off one of her body parts, he hadn't whipped her or tied her up in chains. Shoved her in cage. Slaughtered her family. None of those things had he done. The real monsters and beasts were the humans who had caused her to be the way she was.

"I'm unpredictable and dangerous. There are reasons why an entire continent is after me. Reasons I don't even understand. I'm not afraid of you, Aztrex, I'm afraid of them." She paused and lowered her gaze to her lap. She wasn't going to fight him anymore, she wasn't going to continue hiding. This was no life for her. She'd never be free. She might as well face her fears. "Can you at least come to my home with me so I can get some real clothes and pack my own bags?" If the humans were waiting for her there then she'd at least have someone to watch her back. "Or take me to an airport or a shipyard or something."

There was fear in her voice and defeat in her eyes. She didn't bother hiding it anymore. There was no point now. "I'm going back. Theres no where I can go in the world where they can't find me and I'd rather go to them silently then risk another rescue." She knew how he felt about what he'd done last night. It wasn't that hard to read from him. "Just....drop me off somewhere and I'll figure out the rest on my own."
 
Glancing across at Ryah when she told him that she was the one who was unpredictable and dangerous, Aztrex snorted, faintly amused by her statement. She was pretty predictable in his books and she certainly was not dangerous. So what if a continent was after her? It was because those humans were delusional and put some ridiculous price on her wolf's coat. That had nothing to do with her, but everything to do with the foolish humans in the world. Anything that was different, they wanted. The more one wanted something, the more valuable it became. An easy scam to make more money. But when she said she wasn't afraid of him, but she was afraid of them, he turned his attention away from her. Foolish girl. She should be afraid of him.

When she asked if he could take her to her place atleast so she could get own own clothes, he sighed heavily and shrugged. "I suppose I can do that," he told her. He had no qualms with taking her to her place and he supposed he could take her to the airport. It was only a few hours away. It wasn't like she'd be staying with him.

He looked back over at her momentarily, seeing she had her head bowed toward her lap, her shoulder slouched, almost like she had lost all hope. And then she told him she was going back, saying she'd rather go back quietly than have to be rescued again. Aztrex felt his fangs extend at the wave of emotion that surged through him when he remembered the cage she had been in, how drugged she had been. Those people were going to sell her. Use her for their own gain. And what would they end up doing to her? Anything they so desired. And Ryah had just accepted that. She wasn't going to fight it. She had given up.

Aztrex physically growled and he discarded his bags to the side with a loud thump and he strode over to Ryah, grabbing her wrist and pulling her to her feet. He held fast, making sure she was unable to look away and he stared down at her as he made her look up at him, his blue eyes flashing dangerously. "There is no way in bloody hell I am letting you go back there," he growled, "Do not just give up like that! It is your life and you are free to live it as you please! Do not think for one second that you don't deserve your freedom. I would rather see myself dead than let you go back to them. Don't you fucking dare say you are going back to them. You understand me?!" once he was done, he seemed to realize what he had done and said and he blinked in surprise and quickly let her go and stepped back, glancing away and running a hand through his hair.

"If I am the only means to keep you safe, Ryah," he started, giving her a sidelong glance, "then so be it. I guess I have no choice. But if you are to stay with me, you must do as I say. There will be times where I will need you to leave me alone for a while. Got it?" he said. He couldn't believe he was doing this. He must have lost his mind.
 
Ryah had not been expecting the sudden surge of emotion from the usually quiet and closed off male. She wanted to argue with him. Stomp her feet and proclaim that she had no life. That this was no life. What she wanted she'd never be able to have because she was constantly looking over her shoulder. She could never relax. Even here she'd risked everything by forming a relationship with Tamar and with Amnesia and now with Aztrex. He had to go back to them, to find out who she was and why she'd lost everything and everyone she cared about because of them. Why was she so special? Her entire village had had markings similar to hers but she'd been targeted and singled out. Why?

His next words surprised her even more. After all that about him being dangerous and unpredictable he was going to let her stay with him? Something was no right here. She had a feeling he was only allowing it because she was so hellbent on going back. "I'm still going back to my home land, Aztrex. Nothing you can say or do will change my mind. I need answers. I need to know why they want me so much. What makes me so special. The village I was born in, the entire village, had similar markings to mine. I was young but I remember it all vividly. How they tore through that village looking for something, someone, slaughtering anything that stood in their way. My entire village died and I lived. Why? Whats so special about me."

Clearly she was beginning to get angry about all this. So many people died defending her, protecting her. Why? What made her so special? "I'm going back to my village. The priests at the temple, they'll know. They always know." As she spoke she pushed past Aztrex, hellbent on leaving but she froze at the door and backed away slightly. Voices, there were voices outside the door and scuffling feet. She quickly backed up to where Aztrex still was. "They found me." She whispered softly. She'd know that smell anywhere. The smell of cheap cologne and stale cigar. The man who'd caused her so much pain stood right outside that door.

Ryah had started to tremble her gaze went up to Aztrex and she quickly started pushing him towards the bedroom window. She had a gut feeling he wouldn't want to turn into his Beast again. "We need to go...right now." She was practically begging him. She could've jumped through the window by herself but she didn't want to leave him here to face her tormentors. Plus there were innocent people in this building, what if Aztrex went crazy again. No, she wouldn't let that happen. "Out the window you go, mister. Right now."
 
He about to comment on her stubbornness, that she was stupid for wanting to go back to her home land, that they would be waiting for her, but he was quickly silenced from trying when she told him that her whole village had been slaughtered and she had been left alive. His eyes widened in surprise, caught completely off guard by what she had just told him. Her whole village had been massacred just because they had wanted to find her? Why? That was insane! There was no need to kill s many innocent lives!

When Ryah told him clearly that she was going, no matter what and pushed past him, he turned and reached toward her. But she quickly stopped, hearing something and Az quickly yanked his hand back to his side. What was he going to do? Tell she couldn't go? There was no way he was actually going to stop her if she adamant about it., he wanted to, that much he knew, but he wouldn't. She was just as stubborn as Amnesia and he knew there was no reasoning with one as stubborn as her.

He listened and heard the men at his door, shuffling around like trying to decide whether to come in or go away. His brow furrowed and he glanced at Ryah as she muttered that they were here. Who were? He became very puzzled then. He glanced down at her, where she had backed up to stand near him. He raised a brow as she looked up at him and told him that they had to go now. "...Okay?" he questioned quietly, thrown off balance. Ryah was truly going to do his head in some day. One moment she was all fire and the next she was trying to shoo him towards his bedroom window. He stared down at her when she told him to get out the window. "Wait a second," he grumbled and doubled back to pick up his bags where he had left.

"I did not pack these for nothing, you know," he muttered at her, casting her sidelong look. He opened his window, glancing at his door. It only sounded like a couple men. Even if they were ones who had come after her, they'd be easy enough to over power, even without his Beast. They were humans. But he did as he was told anyway, reluctantly and with a heavy sigh. Climbing out of his window and landing silently on the grass, he waited on Ryah to come down before he shouldered his bags and made his way to the back of his place. It was easy access into the trees behind his building. They could stay out of sight there.

He glanced back at Ryah for a moment and then back towards what had been his home for almost a year. The longest he had stayed anywhere for a very, very long time. He flexed his hands, glancing down at his injured palm as he took a deep breath, thankful that his Beast had quietened down and he was now back in full control of himself. That made things a lot easier. "If you're going back to your home land," he started, looking at Ryah, "you're going to need someone to protect you. I don't feel like rescuing your ass every five seconds, so looks like we'll be together until we get there atleast," he muttered ad he looked away.
 
As soon as they were out the window the door to Aztrex's home burst open and what had to be at least twenty men thundered in with guns drawn and shouting. Led by a tall, muscular man with scars riddling his body and a hard look on his face. A cigar in his mouth as he ordered his men to search every room. Ryah was watching through the window before she joined Az in the forest. There was fear in her eyes. They were her tormentors, the man that smelled of cigars had killed her family and had taken her virginity as a child. She had every right to fear him.

Her thoughts were broken as Aztrex spoke and the look of fear was replaced by one of skepticism. He was coming with her? Why? She could take care of her and he'd been adamant on going his separate ways. As skeptical as she was a part of her was overjoyed at the thought of having company over. "Where's the nearest shipyard? Or airport?" She paused. "We need to head to Asia, northern Asia to be precise. I don't remember the exact name of my village, I was so young, but it was in northern Asia." She nodded. "I can smell my way to it once we're there." After all the people who'd been massacred it'd be hard to mask the scent of that much blood. A baby would be able to find it.

With that said she began the walk into the forest before pausing and turning to face him. "Thank you...for coming....and for saving me." He didn't have to have done that. He had no reason to save her. She wasn't even sure if he saw her as a friend let alone someone worthy of saving. And he certainly didn't have to come with her, she wasn't forcing him to. Though she greatly appreciated him coming. It meant she didn't have to be alone which meant less panic attacks for her to suffer.

"I'm sorry you had to leave your home...because of me." If he hadn't met her he wouldn't have to leave his home. She felt like it was her fault he was now homeless. She'd been the one to draw out his beast and get him involved in this whole mess. Now they had to travel across the world together. Something she knew he didn't want to do.
 
He opened his senses a little when he heard the commotion and he heard the multitude of people entering his house. He was surprised. Thy had done a good job as staying quiet for the most part. Probably to try and throw them off their game and think someone was just coming to visit. Too bad Az never had visitors unless it was Ryah. He hadn't spoken to anyone else in town. Being anti social had its perks at times. People couldn't trick him into thinking they were visiting.

When Ryah asked where the nearest shipyard or airport was, he turned his attention on to her, noting her sceptical expression. Yeah, he'd be giving the same face if he was in her shoes. Aztrex, the master of indifference. The one who demanded space and preferred to be alone, now stating he was going with her. He truly had lost his mind. Completely gone insane. When she told him they had to go to North Asia, he almost choked. "Seriously?" he asked, disbelief written on his features, but he squared his shoulder with a grunt. "Well then, North Asia it is then," he said, rolling his shoulders.

When she thanked him for coming with her, he shrugged. He didn't know how to respond to someone when they thanked him. It made him feel uncomfortable, awkward. He screwed up his nose slightly and turned his attention to where he was walking. Then Ryah apologised for having to leave his home because of her and he let out a bark of laughter. "That's nothing to apologize for. I had been living there for almost a year. That's a long time in my books. I should have left over 6 months ago.. It's about time I got my ass in gear and left," he told her, giving her a sidelong glance and another shrug of indifference. "It's certainly not your fault. I was planning to leave soon anyway," he explained.

He took off a shoulder bag and a backpack, handing them to her. He didn't overly feel like carrying 4 bags when she was carrying none. "Take these for now. They're the lighter two. There's still room in them if you want to stop at your place quickly to grab your things.. Though there may be men there too. You can just borrow my things if you don't want to go there and we can stop off somewhere along the way to get a few things for you," he said. Gosh, he had done more speaking in the last hour than he had in a very, very long time.
 
Ryah refused to go back to her room to retrieve anything of hers. She wasn't attached to anything there anyway. She couldn't afford to be attached. She didn't want to risk going back to her house for fear that there were more men there so after a quick stop at a thrift store for some clothes for her as well as other necessities for her they were on their way. She was quiet for most of the walk to the shipyard. She'd decided on a boat because it was easier to sneak on and there wouldn't be anyone who recognized them there. It wasn't hard to find a ship heading to Asia as most shipments either came or went to Asia.

Once on the ship they stowed away in the cargo, Ryah made a little nest for herself using Aztrex's bags as walls and a hoodie she'd bought as pillow. Despite having slept for so long yesterday she was exhausted by the trip and running and carrying bags. She was also mentally exhausted and worn out. This had been too much for her to handle in one day. Plus they ship had already started moving the rocking was enough to lull her to sleep.

She didn't sleep long though as she was jolted from her sleep by a nightmare. The screams of her family echoing in her head, joined by a new one. A familiar one but she couldn't quite put her finger on who so she simply pushed the nightmare and thoughts away. Maybe while she was here she could explore? She had a feeling they'd on this ship for a long time and since Aztrex wasn't a talker and neither was she, she decided some alone time would be good for both of them.

Shifting into her wolf form she leaped onto one of the many crates in the cargo hold and started leaping and bounding from crate to crate. Exploring her newfound surroundings as well as chasing after rats as a way to entertain herself. There were times when Ryah acted more like a pup then the adult she was. After she grew bored with her adventure she returned back to the nest she had made and laid down in it.
 
Aztrex certainly didn't complain when Ryah refused to go back to her place. He didn't mind. It just meant one less place to go to that was out of their way. Since he had made up his mind to leave, he was itching to leaving the town behind. The only reason he wasn't thrilled about the idea was because he was leaving Amnesia there. That thought had made him pause and he turned to look back at his house through the trees. But he knew she would want him to look after her friend. So he had forced himself to walk forward and leave her behind. But he promised her and himself that some day he would come back.

Ryah had chosen to go by ship and he didn't like the idea very much. Going on a boat meant no places to escape. No place to be by himself. By boat, the journey was long and he was reluctant to go on with her, but he made himself put one foot in front of the other and followed the female onto the boat. They sneaked into the cargo hold and he watched as Ryah build a sort of nest with a hoodie she had purchased and the two bags he had given to her to carry. Not saying a word, he went over a little distance away from her and within visibility of the entrances and exits. He opened his senses so he could hear everything outside the walls, but he couldn't be too cautious.

He could hear Ryah's steady heartbeat, her even breathing and knew she had fallen asleep. Leaning against the wall, he closed his eyes briefly, listening to everything around him. He could hear the rats, the mice, the other little critters and bugs in the cargo hold trying to find things to eat and destroy, could hear the people outside the room. That was one thing great about his Wolf form. He had super keen hearing. Better than most other wolf and wolf shifters due to his overly large ears. It helped to keep himself safe.

It didn't take long before Ryah was awake and bounding from crate to crate, chasing the rodents along the ground and exploring the room. He cracked open an eye, watching her momentarily before closing them again and resting his head back on the wall he was leaning on. Some times, she wasn't that different to Amnesia. She wasn't talkative like her, but she could act like quite the child.. or pup.. Except that had been Amnesia 24 hours a day 7 days a week. He wasn't entirely sure how he had come to care about the little female, but even now, the loneliness she had left in his heart was overwhelming.

Ryah soon went back to her little nest and night soon fell, casting shadows all throughout the room. The only light came from the small overhead lights that swung from side to side as the boat move. Within a few hours, he could feel the boat moving unsteadily, rough and he scented the air. Through the dust, it smelled like rain. He guessed there was a storm going on outside. Tilting his head back and staring at the ceiling, he took a calming breath, trying to slow his heart rate down that had accelerated immediately after realizing what was going on. He stretched his hand high above his head and pushed off the wall, walking around the room, hoping to get his mind off it. He hated storms.

He shook his head and closed his eyes momentarily as he came to the opposite corner of the room. At that single moment of closing his eyes, a memory came to the forefront of his mind.

'The sky was dark and rain poured from the almost black clouds. He was in his wolf form and as he looked around, he saw he was in a large arena with four solid walls surrounding him. In the arena, many other creatures stood, looking just as determined as he, their bloodlust palpable. And then he heard a voice projected over all of them "Those of you who survive shall have a life full of glory. May the strong prevail" the voice was cold, cruel and Aztrex knew exactly what he had to do.

It was then the blood bath began'

His whole body jerked and Aztrex gasped as his eyes flashed open, his hand gripping his shirt just over his racing heart. "Shit," he muttered, panting. "Not now," He groaned as his head pounded, throbbing behind his eyes and temple, feeling like someone was stabbing a knife into his head. He stumbled back, his back smashing into the corner of a crate and he grunted as he brought his other head up, pressing the heel of his palm between his eyes as he squeezed them shut. He took a sharp intake of breath as he slowly slid to the ground, the edge of his shirt lifting slightly. Squinting an eye open a crack, he glanced down and saw the wound he had received from the man who had stabbed him last night. Even now, he didn't feel a thing. It wasn't bleeding, but it hadn't started closing either. His ability to feel pain was extremely flawed. Had been for as long as he could remember. He rarely felt pain and sometimes it could get him into a lot of trouble.

Ignoring his wound, his shut his eyes and grit his teeth through the flashes of colour and memory. He was so close to a breakdown. He didn't want Ryah seeing him, hearing him when he was so weak. Didn't want anyone witnessing that side of him. He might be anti social, but he had his pride. He placed a hand on the crate behind him and forced himself to stand, stumbling slightly. He put a hand out in front of him and flexed his hand, glancing down at where it should be. But like every other time, his vision had failed him. He could no longer see a thing.

It was a drawback resulting from what had happened to him back then. Whenever he had a breakdown, his vision failed him. Even on occasion where he wasn't having one, he would sometimes lose his sight. Sometimes for seconds, sometimes days. It was where his sense of hearing came in handy.

Pressing his lips into a hard line, he cocked his head, wincing at the sharp knife of pain behind his eyes trying to sense his surroundings. He placed a hand on the crate and stumbled forward. He hated boats. The unsteady water caused for terrible footing when he was like this and it didn't take long before a hard wave knocked Aztrex off balance, sending him sprawling on the ground. "Damn it!" He growled under his breath, pushing himself on his hands and knees and slowly rising to his feet. He stretched his arms out momentarily, feeling around him, but he was no longer within reach of a wall or crate. "Damn it," he repeated under his breath, his breathing accelerating to full on panting, panicking that he couldn't tell where he was. This was why he hated boats. Every time he tried to take a step, he was almost thrown of his feet again.

His ears became pointed, furred as he tried to listen to everything around him. He needed to get somewhere he he could feel. He stumbled to the side, toward the sound of a mouse scurrying behind a crate. He outstretched his hand and a few moments later, it touched the wood of a crate and he let out a relieved breath. His gripped onto the wood for dear life, not feeling as the wood punctured his skin with splinters, causing his fingertips to bead with blood. He tried to take a few deep breaths, but the rocking of the boat wouldn't let his heart calm and his lungs constricted and burned with the need for air. He took sips of air, his expressions a mixture of desperate panic and fear. He hated when the world was so dark. Hated it with all his being. Hated not seeing the world around him.
 
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Ryah had been having a fitful sleep so she wasn't deeply asleep when she heard someone's heartbeat begin accelerating. She was still in her wolf form, feeling safer in this form then her human form. Lifting her head from the ground she cocked her ears around as she listened for the source of the panicked heart beats. Aztrex wasn't where she had left him when she fell asleep, was he in trouble? Had they found them here in the middle of nowhere miles from the nearest shoreline?

Shaking her head she stood and left her nest searching out for the panicked heart beats. Now there was panting and swearing and Ryah immediately feared the worse. She found Aztrex gripping one of the crates so hard his hand was bleeding. Whining lightly she approached her friend. But something was off about him, making her falter in her steps but she didn't pause as she licked the males other hand. What was wrong? Had he had a nightmare? Had he seen someone? Why was he like this?

Maybe this was what he meant when he said he needed to be alone sometimes. Did he usually ride this out alone? What would Amnesia do? Backing away from Aztrex Ryah leaped on top of one of the crates and began scouring the large cargo area for somewhere safe to contain him. There, that door! Leaping back down she shifted into her human form and opened a large, steel door. Inside was another cargo room but this one was smaller and held only a few boxes and crates. In her eyes it was perfect. He could be alone and she could still keep an eye on him.

Now to get him into the room. That seemed easier said then done. She left the door open and trotted back to where she'd left Aztrex. "Aztrex..." She murmured calmly, keeping her senses up and her muscles tense. Ready to bolt if need be. "Aztrex, I found a room where you can be alone....its smaller then this one so you don't have to stumble around so much. It has a door so you can shut yourself away if need be." She wasn't even sure he could hear her. He was acting to strange.

Ryah wanted nothing more then to help her friend but she wasn't sure what to do. Hell, she didn't even know what was happening. She'd been so young when she'd seen her father go into his Blood form. She remembered next to nothing about it, much less what her mother had done to soothe the beast. "Aztrex? Can you hear me?" She murmured again as she hesitantly touched his arm to let him know she was there, just in case he couldn't hear.

What was that saying? Music doth calm the savage beast or something like that. It was worth a try, but she didn't have a radio. If music didn't calm him then at least it'd be a way for her to lead him to the metal room she'd found. Wracking her brain, she found a memory of her mother singing what appeared to be a lullaby. It was worth a try. Hesitantly, she started singing and at the same time backing away from him, hoping he'd follow her. Ryah had never sang before but her voice came out....not like herself. As if someone else were singing. Soothingly, softly, like a mother would calm her child.
 
He soon heard someone approaching him and he turned his head in their direction and scenting the air quickly wit the little air his lungs would allow him. He recognised the scent as Ryah immediately and he tensed. Why did she have to wake? Why couldn't she have stayed asleep? Let him go through on his own like he always did? It was easier. He didn't want her witnessing this. Didn't want to see the pity in her gaze when he came to finally, when ever that happened.

He could hear she was close, could feel her breath, but he still didn't expect her to lick his hand and he jerked it away on reflex, startled, unsure of what it had been that touched him. Through the pounding in his head, the memories that pelted his mind, he thought it had felt similar to that of a wolf's tongue. So Ryah was in her wolf form. He soon heard her back away and he felt a rush of relief, thinking she was giving him some privacy. The boat rocked and he tensed, curling his toes inward in his boots, his hands bracing against the wooden crate even tighter, trying not to fall.

But Ryah came back a little while later and he cocked his head in her direction when she murmured his name, wincing at the spike of pain caused by both his movement and her voice. He opened his eyes even though he couldn't see, scanning the area blindly for where ever Ryah stood. When she spoke again, his blank eyes landed on her. His pupils had contracted so far, they were merely pinpricks in his irises, which had since glazed over from his inability to see a thing. When she told him she had found a room for him, he straightened slightly before tensing again as the boat rocked violently. He pretty much had a death grip on the wood and it creaked under his strength.

When she asked if he could hear her, he gave a slow nod, his vacant gaze searching the room again. "I can.." he winced at his own voice, "hear you.." he flinched when he touched his arm and his head jerked downward in the direction of her hand and he grunted at the sudden movement. He heard her back away and he raised his head slowly, squeezing his eyes shut against the vision.

'Blood splattering the ground momentarily before being washed away by the rain. The dangerous dance between himself and a small grey wolf. Jaws snapping, fur ripping, skin tearing. The scent of blood and rain, his teeth tearing through the wolf's throat. The metallic taste of blood. A small victory among many. The fight goes one'

Aztrex groaned at the memory, wishing he could get rid of them all. Wishing he could forget everything that had happened in his life. It would make things so much simpler.

But his thought were momentarily silenced when he heard a voice. Someone singing. It was warm, tender and lovely. Unlike anything he had ever heard before. He knew it came from Ryah, for she was the only one here besides himself and the critters scurrying about. He hesitated, reluctant to let go of his only support, but she had told him she had found a room for him. Slowly, he let go of the crate and followed her voice. There were many times had to stop and balance himself again and he couldn't walk very straight on the rocking boat. He stumbled forward, hands outstretched, trying to find something to hold onto. His heart kicked up a notch at the panic of not being able to grasp anything and he hurried forward faster, tripping a few times.

He fell forward and threw his hands out in front of him and his hands quickly grasped onto the first thing he found. One grasped a metal doorknob, the other what felt like a door frame. He pulled himself up to stand properly and he leaned against the door frame for a few moments, panting shallow breaths. Pain slammed into his head and he yelped in surprise, the force of it causing him to stumble forward into the new room. He instantly felt around for something to grasp and found a wall. He didn't even attempt to move away from it. He turned slightly, listening and though she had stopped singing, he could hear her in the room with him.

"Please.. Leave," he ground out, "and shut the door," he didn't even wait for her to leave, couldn't. He collapsed onto the floor, leaning against the wall, crying out from the sudden onslaught of pain, colour and visions.
 
Ryah was torn between giving him what he wanted, privacy or helping her friend. But there was nothing she could do as she watched him go down. His screams echoing in her mind as she left, shutting the door behind her. Thank god they were on a ship. His screams blended in with the moaning and groaning the ship made against the storm. Backing away from the room she ran back to her little nest and sat there feeling utterly helpless. She tried to sleep but sleep would not come to her and she ended up digging through one of his bags in search of food and water. Once it was found she walked back to the room he was in. It'd been about an hour since she'd left him.

Opening the door a crack she strained her eyes some before she laid the food and water on the floor and pushed it into the room before quickly shutting it behind her. There, now he had food for when he came to. She felt a little better. Just a little better. "You're not alone, Aztrex." She murmured as she sat down outside the room. He'd told her to leave and shut the door but he'd never said she couldn't stick around and keep an eye on him. Even if she couldn't see him. She knew he'd hear her through the metal door, he had crazy good hearing.

"I'm not sure how far gone you are right now. You probably don't understand anything I'm saying....or are blocking me out. Or both." When she was worried she tended to ramble. "I figured you'd like to hear a story while you're in there. Maybe it'll help or maybe it'll just be white noise. I can't sleep so I need something to do besides pace around her nervously." She paused as she hugged her knees to her chest and laid her chin on them.

"When I was little I used to be terrified of storms like this one. The howling of the wind sounded like a monster and the crack of thunder and lightning sounded like the angry roar of some beast out to get me. I would hide under my bed whenever it stormed. The only person who could get me out of there was my father." She'd been such a daddy's girl growing up. "One night he told me a story about two lovers separated because their families didn't want them together. It was a prince and a princess from countries at war. They would meet in secret every night but every morning they'd have to return to their kingdoms. One night the princes brother followed him to the secret meeting place and discovered the two lovers. Enraged he returned to his father and told him what he'd seen. From then on the prince was locked in a windowless tower, never to see his beloved again. As time passed he would die in that tower of a broken heart. His spirit would go into the sky and from the sky he would see that the princess he'd fallen in love with had passed away as well. But her spirit was chained to the earth. Even in death their families wished to keep them separated."

Ryah paused as she leaned back against the metal wall. Lost in her own memories. "Whenever theres a storm its the prince calling out for his beloved. The rain is his angry tears and the thunder is his wailing. The wind is the princess singing to comfort her enraged beloved. Her singing is able to lull him into slumber once more but each time he awakens he is just as enraged as the last time and thus another storm is born only to be calmed by the princess's singing in the wind."
 
Aztrex was grateful that Ryah left instead of attempting to help. There was nothing either of them could do. He just needed to wait it out, deal with it, ride it out as best he would. Easier said than done though, when it felt like his head was being split open. His normal sense of pain was pretty much mute, non-existence. Someone could stab him and the worst it would feel like was a paper cut. His sense of feeling was fine, but because of what had happened to him, somehow, his sense of pain wasn't there. But, when he was like this, is felt like every scar in his head was splitting open one by one, slowly, to deliberately cause him agony. If he felt it like this, he would hate to see how it felt to normal person. Many creatures back then had gone insane from it, some even died from it. It made him slightly glad that he had it instead of someone like Ryah. There was no way someone like her could handle it.

Yelping in pain, Aztrex almost shifted into his wolf form, but he quickly stopped himself. No. He wasn't going to shift. It wasn't like he could just run away from it. Blank eyes darting to and fro, his pupils dilating and contracting constantly, trying to focus, to see something. Anything. But it was no use. He couldn't force himself to see anything. Sweat beaded on his skin and he quickly felt incredibly hot. He groaned, shifting slightly as he grasped the edge of his shirt and pulled it off in one easy sweep and discarded it to the side. He squeezed his eyes shut and tried to ignore it.

He didn't know how long had passed but he heard someone approaching the door and he opened his eyes again out of habit. He heard the door creak open and he almost growled for her to leave. But he bit his lip to keep himself silent and laid on his side, bringing his knees toward his chest and bowing his head forward, wishing that it would stop. He could heard Ryah placing something down on the ground and pushed it inside his room before quickly shutting the door and Aztrex groaned, pressing the heel of his palm into his temple.

He could hear Ryah just outside his door, speaking, but he quickly shut it out, her voice cutting through his mind. But snippets of her story reached him. He felt a warm trickle coming out of his nose and he touched a finger to it and it came away sticky. Blood. He was quite surprised it had come already. Good. It was almost over. Ryah eventually fell silent and Aztrex opened his eyes again after around half hour more, the pain in his head slowly subsiding. He blinked rapidly as he began to see very vague shadows.

After a little while his vision returned and the pain in his head had dimmed to a minor throb. He gave a heavy sigh of relief and he pushed himself to sit up. He stared at the water bottle and the food Ryah had left for him. He shuffled over to grab the water bottle and quickly unscrewed the lid and took a long drink, almost emptying it. But he left the food untouched as he hesitantly pushed himself to his feet. He unsteadily walked over and picked up his discarded shirt. He stretched his legs, waiting for a few more minutes until he could walk properly again before he strode toward the door. He pulled it open, glancing down at Ryah and offered her a forced half-smile, muttering, "thanks for leaving," before he strode over to his bags and threw his shirt on top of it. He still felt hot.

Maybe if he acted like nothing had happened, like everything was normal, she wouldn't ask questions. He wasn't ready to answer questions about what had happened as that required him to explain his past.
 
Ryah had begun to doze off after she'd finished her story and was jolted awake by the sound of the metal door opening. She was wary of whatever stepped out, her muscles tense but she relaxed slightly when she realized that Aztrex was more or less back to normal. She watched him walk back to his bags and warily followed after him. Honestly, she didn't want to know what possessed him last night, she had a feeling he wouldn't tell her anyway so she didn't bring it up.

She hadn't slept a wink last night in between watching him and not worrying too much. She was bone tired now. She shifted into her wolf form and curled up into a ball to retain warmth in the only way she knew how without a tail. At least it had stopped storming now. She couldn't help but dwell on the story that she'd told Aztrex. The prince was calm now and would sleep until he awoke without his beloved once more. It was a childish story but it was one of the few ties to her family she still had. Especially her father. One would assume she'd been close to her mother, but it was her father she had looked up to and admired.

Shaking her head of such memories she curled up into an even tighter ball as she shivered lightly from cold. Last night as she watched and heard Az go through his memories and his pain she'd felt utterly useless. How was she to help him if she didn't know what was going on? A part of her wanted to help but another part knew better then to help. He wanted nothing to do with her. He was only along for the trip because he felt a need to protect her like some child and because she had asked. If she hadn't he'd be living his own life and she'd be on her way to be slaughtered for her fur or worse.

Through these troubling thoughts Ryah was able to fall asleep. It was a rather deep sleep with a different dream then what she was used to. Usually, her dreams consisted of the images of Tamar or Amnesia. In this dream she was running in her wolf. But it wasn't a panicked running, she was happy and whoever was chasing her was doing so out of play. It must have been Tamar. That was the only person who she would've allowed to completely drop her defenses around. Even with Amnesia she was more or less on alert. As the dream progressed she would grow tired of running and would lay back on the soft grass, the sun warming her small body. Her eyes would close and she'd feel the nuzzles and nudges of Tamar. She'd shift into her human form and he would too and she'd be able to feel his lips on her neck and shoulder and her cheek and finally her own lips met his own.

Needless to say this dream grew hot and heavy pretty fast and the entire time her eyes were closed in the dream or she was in a position where she couldn't see Tamar. But finally, there would come a moment where she would be able to see him, kneeling over her. Each scar on his beautiful body would tell a story as she pressed soft kisses along each one. A sudden realization dawned on her. Tamar didn't have any scars. He'd led a perfect life, had been raised in a loving home, he had no scars. The dream progressed and finally she was able to see her lovers face and was startled awake when she realized who it was she'd been making love to.

No, no, no, no. This couldn't be happening. She'd been unaware of her squirming and whining in her sleep. She was no longer curled up in a ball, she was laid out on her back and she quickly rolled back over. She was panting lightly as she laid her head on her paws. But she refused to fall back to sleep again. Not if it was Aztrex's face waiting for her on the other side. Shaking her head she stood and quickly, shamefully even, climbed onto one of the crates to be alone. She wasn't sure if she was afraid of the dream itself or what had happened in the dream. Afraid because she knew it would never happen. She felt as if she were betraying Tamar, worse, she felt like she was betraying her best friend. Even if she'd done nothing the dream itself was enough for Ryah to feel...well...to feel like a whore.
 
Aztrex would be eternally grateful that Ryah hadn't questioned him about what had happened. Granted, he wouldn't have answered, but it was nice to know that she wasn't going to pry into his life. It was a small comfort knowing he wouldn't have refuse telling her anything. Giving a small sigh, he sat down, leaning his bare back against the wall. He watched in silence as Ryah went and shifted into her wolf form and curled up in her make shift nest. A few minutes later, her breathing and heart rate evened out and he could tell she had fallen asleep. Leaning his head back against the wall, he brought one knee up to his chest and stretched the other out in front of him as he closed his eyes, feeling spent after everything that had happened in the last few hours.

He managed to achieve a few minutes sleep before a noise startled him awake. Ryah was whining. He looked over at her, thinking someone had gotten past him somehow, but she was still asleep and she had squirmed onto her back, whining. He raised a single brow before he shook his head and closed his eyes again. But he couldn't fall back to sleep again. He could hear Ryah's heart beat picked up in her sleep and he couldn't help but wonder what the hell she was dreaming about. He cracked open an eye, looking over at her momentarily before he groaned and turned slightly to face away from her.

Not long after, he heard her startle awake, her breathing accelerating. He decided to ignore her for now, she may want her space after all. He didn't know what she had dreamt about, for all he knew it was about her family and she could be upset and needing space. So he'd give it to her. He heard her stand and then climb onto one of the crates and things fell quiet again.

He inhaled a deep breath, hoping to get a little rest. Gosh, he hadn't actually wanted rest in a long time. But then he smelt something and every muscle in his body tensed. That familiar scent that he despised with all his being. His brow furrowed and he shifted, to glance up at Ryah on top of the crate before he quickly looked away. Just fantastic. She was in heat. That's exactly what he wanted right now.. Yeah, right. He grumbled under his breath as he tried to get comfortable again.

He could ignore it for the most part for a few hours. But he wasn't sure how it would affect him over long periods of time. But did Ryah know? He shifted again and then groaned and pushed himself to his feet and, hesitantly, he walked toward the crate Ryah was on. He paused at the bottom of it, glancing upwards for a moment before he cleared his throat, letting Ryah know he was there. He looked away, feeling too awkward to look at her. "Um, Ryah..?" he started, brow furrowing. How to tell her? He had no clue! "You're, um.. Uh, you're in, uh.." he really couldn't say it. "It's that time..." he muttered, hoping she'd understand as his face heated, embarrassed. "Right, um, yeah.. I thought, i'd, uh, let you know.. Right.. I'll go back now," he sputtered and then turned around and almost power walked back to where he had been earlier and sat down, cross legged, his back facing Ryah. "So smooth, Az," he muttered under his breath with a groan.
 
Ryah flicked her ear to listen to Aztrex beneath her and sighed softly at his words. She figured she was in heat. She only had naughty dreams when she was in heat. Thankfully it was only the first day of it. If Aztrex was anything like Tamar, instinct wise at least, he'd be after her tail by the third or fourth day. At least with Tamar she'd been the one to pounce on him. She couldn't do that with Aztrex. No, she wouldn't even think of that. She refused to think of that. Thinking of that would surely lead to nothing but trouble.

Standing from the crate she leaped from crate to crate, seeking a suitable place to hide until her heat subsided but she could only think of the metal room she'd placed Az in last night. That wouldn't do. That was his room. She'd just have to hope Az wasn't as good a climber as her. Running back to her nest she took a few of the clothes she'd bought in her jaws. God, she wished she had her tail. At least with her tail she'd be able to somewhat mask her scent. She felt so naked in her heat without it.

Once she had a suitable amount of clothing she climbed back onto the nearest crate then leapt around until she was on the highest crate as far away as she could get to the male. She returned to Az's bags a few more times, gathering food and water. Having every intention to keep as far away from him as she possibly could. The last time she returned she was in her human form. "I'm.....I'm sorry. I didn't know. Had I know...." Had she known what? What could she have done? "I wouldn't have asked you to come with me." She murmured softly before she shifted back into her wolf form and climbed back up to her nest.

It hurt. Her instincts drove her to the closest male she could find. It was a pity that it had to be Aztrex. She'd just started seeing him as a friend now her body wanted more. Maybe she should just leave. But leave where? They were in the ocean in the middle of nowhere. Miles away from the nearest shoreline. She couldn't escape her instincts. Shifting into her human form up on top of all those crates. She laid down and stared up at the ceiling. She couldn't even escape into her dreams for fear she'd have another of Aztrex.
 
Aztrex listened as Ryah climbed up and down the crate, taking her belongings with her. He guessed she planned to stay up on the crates, probably thinking he wouldn't be able to get to her if she was up there. Not that he was interested in her like that, but she was sorely mistaken. He could get up there quicker than what a cat could. Not that he dare tell her that. He understood she needed to feel safe. Secure. As much as she was able to, anyway. He ran a hand up his arm and rubbed the back of his neck, feeling extremely awkward. With Amnesia, he had told her outright not to come near him. He was able to control himself easily, but it made him uncomfortable. It messed with his head after long periods of time.

The last time she returned to the bags, her footsteps were different and he knew she had shifted to her human form. When she spoke, he tensed, not expecting her to speak. He didn't dare look back at her in case she hadn't put any clothes on and he shook his head. She said she wouldn't have asked him to come if she had known and he gave a heavy sigh. "It's fine, Ryah. I can handle it," he told her.. He hoped.

He listened as she climbed back up onto the crate and he relaxed a little more now that there was a little distance between them. Even if distance didn't make her scent any less potent. He, instead, breathed through his mouth, slowly, evening out his breathing as he closed his eyes. He didn't even realize it, but he drifted off to sleep for a few hours. When he awoke, he felt quite a bit better, even though his lack of sleep over the last couple months still weighed him down, he did feel a little better.

After around 37 hours, the scent smothered the room and Az almost choked up at what he felt. He could feel his wolf side, demanding to go to the female and smell her properly, see if she was ready to breed yet. He squirmed uncomfortably and he reached to his bags, dragging one over to him and he opened it and grabbed a bottle of water. Unscrewing the cap, he took a drink before pouring a little on his hand and splashing it on his face. He needed to concentrate. Stop thinking about it.

He quickly pushed himself to his feet and paced the room, feeling extremely uncomfortable in this situation. He needed to breathe. He couldn't smell anything other than Ryah in heat and it was driving him insane. His body was feeling things he wasn't used to and didn't quite understand. His nerves wouldn't settle and his wolf was becoming more desperate. He felt hot, like he had a fever and it didn't take long before he had to pull his shirt off again.

Growling under his breath, Az glanced in Ryah's direction before he squeezed his eyes shut and shook his head and ran his hand through his hand. His brow furrowed as he walked the perimeter of the room trying to get his mind onto anything other than Ryah. In the end, he grabbed his bags and practically ran to the other room, slamming the door behind him. He took a deep breath and let out a sigh of relief. Though his overdeveloped sense of smell could still smell her, the air was a lot clearer. He strode to the other side of the room and slid to the ground. He flexed his hands in front of him and shook his head. "Just another reason to despise boats," he growled under his breath.
 
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