Through Clouded Eyes [B l u E s & ChaoticPeace]

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BlossomStars

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Tears spilled from pained eyes as tired feet met the dirty cement surface of the sidewalk. Sniffles escaped the small girl as she tried desperately not to burst into violent, ugly sobs in the middle of the university campus. She was still in shock about what she had just seen, and a part of her couldn't believe it. She overwhelmingly didn't want to, and a part of her wished she had never bothered surprising James with a visit. It wouldn't have changed anything, but she at least wouldn't have known. As they said, ignorance was bliss.

Finally reaching the opposite side of the campus where many of the boys dorms were Lana let herself into the building, keeping her head down and ignoring the awkward glances of the few males that roamed the halls as she walked up the the second floor. Fortunately her feet knew exactly where to take her, as she'd visited this place many times before. Even if she had tried to look where she was going though, she wouldn't have been able to. The tears that built up on her eyes, hot against the sensitive feature, obstructed her vision, making everything blurry and out of focus. No matter how often or how ferociously Lana rubbed at her eyes she could not clear them away, and the tears almost seemed to flow more freely the more fervently she tried to get rid of them.

Lana just about pounded on the door when she finally arrived at the correct one. She knew by heart where Troy's dorm was, as she'd visited many times. She just hoped he would be home now. She didn't see why he wouldn't be -it was too late to still be at school but far too early for any kind of social event- but she couldn't help but worry.

"Troy." She tried speaking when she knocked again, worried that he may have been ignoring her, thinking she was someone else. Lana tried to keep her voice as even as possible, not wanting to worry or even somehow anger him before he'd even opened the door. Still, it warbled and fluctuated, making it quite obvious that she was crying. Of course he would notice her current state the moment he did so, if he was even home. Why Lana was here if she didn't want Troy seeing her upset was a mystery to Lana. Honestly, she wasn't even sure why she'd come to him. After all, he wasn't exactly her most sensitive, empathetic of her friends. Somehow though he had been her first choice. Perhaps Lana just knew she could rely on him if she really needed something, or someone. Aside from that Anastasia had a date tonight, and Lana really didn't want to interrupt her.

--

@B l u E s
 
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Troy shoved his hand in his pockets as he walked towards the campus with a bag from the closest 7/11. He had instant noodles, a few red bulls and his weekly crappy and preservative filled food for the week. He had earphones in his ears blasting his heavy metal as he made his way towards his dorm room. He was luckily one of the very few with no one sharing his room. Which was amazing considering that he wasn't paying any extra fees when the dude decided to change room.
As he walked with a rapid pace, the dark haired boy walked with annoyance and heavy footstep his wide shoulders banging against the ones who dared shove themselve in front of him. He was beyond frustrated today, more than any. His mind was bloody red as his breathing was erratically and loud.

only when he saw Lana, the blue haired friend of his in front of the door, waiting for him to open. Without really thinking, and actually happy to see her reach out to him of all days, he simply caught her by surprise as he rested his forehead on her shoulder, controlling his breathing and not seeing the tears in her eyes since he came from the back. He simply talked with the music blasting in his ears.

'' Hey, '' he simply said with his gravelly voice.

He didn't expect her, but it felt good seeing her here. He knew that he wasn't exactly the most eccentric or fun person to be around, but seeing friends who actually bothered coming to see him removed some weight from his shoulders.

the song in his earphone: Ungrateful- Escape The Fate
 
Lana jumped when she suddenly felt weight on her shoulder, a presence behind her. Quickly turning her head to see who had just seemingly rested their head against her shoulder she was both surprised and relieved to see Troy.

"Hi." She spoke, voice still wobbling but now tinted with lingering surprise. The blue haired undergraduate quickly wiped at her eyes when she realized that Troy could see her, quickly wiping at the tears that had collected on her moistened cheeks, brushing them off with the heel of her palms. Of course, even if the tears had stopped -which they hadn't- no amount of trying to dry her cheeks would get rid of her red-rimmed eyes or any other obvious signs of her distress.

"Were you out?" Lana knew it was a stupid question from the moment but she wasn't sure what else to say all of a sudden. It was quite obvious by the bag in Troy's hand and the fact that he was returning to his dorm that the answer to her question was 'yes', but at least making him say it may allow her a little more time to collect herself, or postpone her now inevitable explanation of what had happened. On on hand she did want to talk about it, she needed to - it was swirling in her gut and making her sick. On the other hand though she wasn't sure if she could. It was still painful, a fresh cut that she wasn't sure she could handle poking at. Still, being a friend, Troy probably wasn't going to give her much choice in the matter.
 
Troy lifted his head and simply inserted his key in the lock as he pushed the door open. He simply nodded to her statement reading her lips as he lifted his white bag as he entered, letting the door for her to enter without insisting or anything. He placed the bag on the bed as he removed his earplugs as he kicked a dirty pair of boxers out of view. '' Hungry?'' he asked glancing up at her as he shakes a box of instant noodles.

He noticed her sob, he could see that she was probably sadden by something, but he wouldn't force her to talk nor initiate anything. It was odd for him to do so. What he would do though is give her a place to collect her mind and have a friend that will listen to her and be truthful. He wasn't going to bullshit around and immediately be by her side without hearing the whole story.

'' I have...'' he said straightened back up and hearing a vertebral crack, '' also some left overs in the fridge, '' he said pointing the mini cola cola fridge next to his desk which had sandwiches, some drinks and other stuff he never got to finish.
 
Lana just nodded at Troy's question, taking a seat on the small sofa in the dorm. She knew he wouldn't mind her making herself at home and would likely prefer it to having to tell her to do so, so she took the initiative.

"Noodles, maybe, if you don't mind. Please." Lana wasn't incredibly hungry, but food did tend to make her feel a little better, especially warm, more junkie foods like instant noodles. They were comfort foods of sorts, she supposed. Something easy, simplistic, and readily available it was something good to grab for a pick me up snack. While Troy started getting that ready Lana remained seated on the couch, leaning down to lay her face, which she had covered with her hands, on her knees. She tried to muffle her sobs, and for the most part she did a good job, tears falling down her face silently. However she couldn't hold back a few sobs, heavy, wet sounds that shook her shoulders.

"Thank you." Lana finally sat up, wiping the blackened tears that has collected on her face once more, tainted by the mascara that had once been on her eyelashes, though was now messily smudged all down her cheeks, collecting under her eyes. However that was the last thing on Lana's mind at the moment. She continued her quiet, pitiful sobs for a little while longer as she waited for the noodles to cool enough for her to eat, sniffling and rubbing at her eyes every once and a while. Once she was able to eat she calmed down a little more quickly, having something else to occupy her.

"He cheated." She finally admitted. The admission felt like a weight off of her, but the truth of the situation dropped back into her gut like a rock, heavy and unmoving. She wanted more than anything for it not to be true, to have been a stupid nightmare, a bad trip - anything but reality. But there was nothing she could do now to change what happened.

"I, uh..." Lana paused when her voice cracked again, taking another moment to collect herself though her voice began to shake again when she managed to continue, "I saw him."
 
Troy was heating up the two noodle pots in the microwave as he listened to her with his back given to the window. He blinked as he turned his head scrunching his nose, '' Oh, '' he said not expecting that. '' Who was the girl?'' he asked curiously as he sat on his desk and placed his foot on the headboard next to her. The dorm room was rather small even with the beds against one another to have a bigger one. There was a guitar laying against the wall with a few posters on the wall. There was little christmas lights hanged on from the ceiling and an overall chill atmosphere of the dorm.
'' Is it that girl in the history program... what was her name again, '' he trailed off hearing a bit about that girl lurking around James a lot recently, '' Emily? '' he asked remembering the perfect and gorgeous looking blond girl. To say the least, she was a bomb and, well, had the reputation of being a couple breaker. Now, he had his proof, or so he thought. She was his taste, not that he would tell her that or even say anything related about her looks. He just kind of understood why a guy would fall for her.
 
"I don't know... some preppy looking blonde." Lana really hadn't stuck around long enough to see who it had been. Even if she had known her she wouldn't have been able to tell. The moment she had been able to asses what was going on Lana had taken off, and headed straight here afterwards. A part of Lana was glad she had. Troy wasn't pushy, and somehow his lack of extreme sympathy was actually kind of comforting in a strange way. It almost seemed to serve to calm the blue haired girl down some, keep her from panicked hysterics.

"How the hell am I supposed to know?!" Lana snapped when Troy offered a suggestion, suddenly angry. That anger quickly fanded though, replaced by guilt. It wasn't Troy's fault, it was unreasonable to take it out on him. He wasn't being anything but nice -nice for him anyways- right now.

"I'm sorry." Lana apologized quickly, looking down at her lap, "I just... I never thought he would do this, you know? We've been dating since high school. That's, like, nearly four years now." Lana knew that that didn't mean anything in it's self, but it still bothered her that James could have done this to her after all these years. She'd trusted him, and he'd just thrown her away like she was nothing, all for some bottle blonde whore. Sighing heavily Lana rubbed at her eyes, sighing again when she took note of the black that rubbed off onto her palms. At least she had stopped crying for the mean time. Cursing quietly under her breath, Lana pulled her legs up against her chest, resting her chin on her knees.

"Do you maybe want to watch a movie or something? If you have time?" She just wanted something to take her mind off of James. Just about anything would have worked at this point.
 
Troy laughed as he popped a chocolate from his drawer. '' Look at you snapping at me. It's good to know some people aren't scared of me, '' he teased as he removed both of the noodle cups. He found two plastic forks and shoved them in the cups before bringing it closer to her, the steam fogging his vision glasses a bit. He rarely wore those since he looked like a geek, but since he had an infection in the eye just a few days back, he couldn't wear his contacts.

'' A movie sounds actually great. Zombieland? I'm in the mood for some shitty and funny movie, '' he said finding the opportunity to change his mood. It always helped hearing the problems of the others and not just self loathing alone. '' What did you catch them do by the way?'' he asked assuming it was sex, but maybe it was just hugging or a kiss. Or else why would she overreact or something? Placing his cup next to the headboard, he started rummaging his movies as he showed her various titles. He was listening to her if she was going to ramble. He was the type of friend that never interrupted a spurt of words. He found it entertaining somehow.
 
"Works for me." Lana shrugged. As long as it wasn't something cute or God forbid romantic, she was up for anything. Lana felt that it was safe to assume that Troy wasn't about to pick out any movies along those lines, if he even owned them, which she also doubted.

"Shaun of the dead would probably fit that category too." Lana suggested with a shrug. She wasn't sure how in the mood she was for a comedy exactly, as she wasn't exactly in a giddy, ready to laugh mood, but it wouldn't hurt anything. Maybe it would even be able to cheer her up somehow, especially if it was really corny - who knew?

When Troy piped up again, asking what exactly Lana had walked in on Lana gave him a bit of a glare, one that easily read 'what do you think I caught them doing?'. Still she decided to give him a proper answer after a moment.

"Well, it wasn't exactly... uh, well, you know..." Lana scratched her cheek, finding the answer more awkward to admit than she had anticipated, "Nothing I'd feel the need to bleach my eyes over, but... Well, let's just say it would have been if I had have walked in any later than I did." Lana looked down, staring at her knees as if they'd suddenly become the most interesting thing in the room. Honestly what Lana was most afraid of in this situation was her worth. Had she not been good enough for James? Was that it? Was that why he had felt like he needed to go off with another girl behind her back? Had she done something to upset him? Should she have done something more? These worries are at Lana but she kept quiet about them, not wanting to share them with Troy. She honestly didn't intend to share anything more with Troy but it wasn't long until she was talking again, words pouring from her mouth like a waterfall.

"I don't know what the hell he was thinking! I mean, who would do something like that? After so long? I mean if he didn't want me anymore he could have just told me!" Lanna was snapping again though not at anyone this time, running a vexed hand though her thin hair. She was stressed, angry, and miserably sad and insecure. She didn't know what to do. She didn't want any of those feelings, but there was no way to get rid of them. She was beginning to get upset again and stopped speaking again, sighing and muttering a garbled apology as she set herself to just watch Troy set up the movie.
 
Troy nodded in agreement with her as he inserted Shaun of the Dead in his cd player. He then crawled back to the bed in a reasonable distance from her and grabbed his cup to eat. He slurped a few noodles before speaking up his mind. '' True... To some extent. Now, I'm not at all agreeing with that guy, but instead of crying and everything, how about you be the one breaking up with him. And it's been four years... did you actually expect it to last until marriage or something?'' he asked being bluntly honest. He was just that direct. He wasn't gonna turn around the pot and try to coax everything. No, he will be honest and think of a solution. '' If I was you, I'd suck it up, hate him and move on. They always say the best revenge is to be happy...'' he said quoting that sentence wrong and realizing. He was trying to remember the exact words in vain.
 
"Well no..." Troy did have a point there, but that really didn't make Lana feel any better, "I mean... I don't know, I guess not. I just didn't expect it to end like this, you know?" Lana turned her head, looking somewhere off into the middle distance.

"I know, I just... It sucks. It's a really douchey thing to do." Lana sighed, taking a moment to burry herself in her noodles with a semi-playful pout, taking a few bites of the comforting food. She really didn't want revenge. There was a part of her that did, but she knew that wouldn't make her feel any better. Really Lana just wanted to forget any of this had ever happened, though that wasn't incredibly likely either.

As the movie started Lana shifted her attention to the film, letting herself slide down slightly into a position that was probably terrible for her spine, but was still somehow more comfortable.
 
Troy tilted his head slightly towards her as he stared at the show, '' I'm not the best at making people feel good. Sorry about that. But if it helps, I had a pretty damn shitty day, '' he said to her thinking it might help her forget about what happened. His legs spread and touching hers with his back against the wall in the same position at her, he was in the same crappy mood as her, but in a more Troy-ish way. He won't ever show his emotion when around his friends and will always act as if everything is as usual. He won't hide it, but he won't just shove his bad mood on your face if you don't ask for it.
 
"Yeah? What happened?" Lana wouldn't say she wasn't curious about his day. She generally liked to hear about other people and never minded listening to their problems, but she found herself really wanting to know what had happened to make Troy's day so crap at this moment. Perhaps she was just a caring friend, but for the moment it would be more likely to assume that misery loved company and she was just seeking someone she could relate to.

Lana honestly didn't really care too much about the first part of Troy's sentence. She'd known when he'd come here that he wasn't a really empathetic, sensitive person. She really didn't mind too much. Lana was tougher than she often appeared and didn't need the pity party, but she did appreciate it when her friends let her use them as a sounding board if she really needed to, or if they gave her somewhere to be when she needed it. Troy was doing both of those things and Lana would have to lie to say she didn't appreciate it.
 
Troy shrugged, '' Got into a fight... '' he started off smoothly. It wasn't something surprising coming from him, but this time, it was slightly more important. Troy wouldn't make a big deal if it was just another fight with assholes or other students. It showed that his cheek was slightly blue, but he didn't look too beat up nor does he look like he just had a fight.
His hair was messy, but apart from that, nothing to worry about.
[im so sorry for this very late reply... PM me if you want to know why or just to catch up :) ]
 
(Oh no that's alright don't worry about it. We all get busy sometimes ^^)

Lana looked up at Troy when he mentioned his fight, focus shifting to something other than James and the turmoil he'd thrown her into for maybe the first time today. Troy got into fights all the time, petty things most of the time. He wasn't a very patient guy so it wasn't uncommon for him to lose his head and beat up someone who'd done something to annoy him. However it was fairly uncommon for it to actually bother the you man and Lana was clever enough to know that something was different about the fight Troy had gotten into today.

"What happened?" Timid curiosity filled Lana's voice as she sat up slightly, interest obviously piqued. As curious as she was though she couldn't help but be a bit worried. She didn't like the idea of Troy getting himself hurt, though it didn't seem like he had been injured too badly. After all Lana hadn't even been able to tell that he has been fighting until he told her.
 
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