Things You Learn in Retail Stores

  • So many newbies lately! Here is a very important PSA about one of our most vital content policies! Read it even if you are an ancient member!

Blind Hemingway

Ancient Iwaku Scum from 2006.
Original poster
Posting Speed
  1. Slow As Molasses
Online Availability
Writing Levels
  1. Adept
  2. Douche
Preferred Character Gender
  1. Primarily Prefer Female
Surrealism, Surreal Horror (Think Tim Burton), Steampunk, Sci-Fi Fantasy, Spaghetti Westerns, Mercenaries, Dieselpunk, Cyberpunk, Historical fantasies
Things I've learned by observation this evening:

1. Teenagers kissing in a retail store is GROSS, unless it's two hawt chicks or somethin' like that.

2. Girls with bald heads and having a long pony tail is not the sign of being non conformist. It makes you look like a moron.

3. Screaming babies do not get less annoying in changing room surroundings.

4. People truly do not care how they look when they leave the house, i.e. really fat people like them ones that weigh 1500 lbs wearing PJs meant for teens.

5. "Bitch Central" is apparently secret code for "Costumer Services."
7 - Even rich people are trashy people.

8 - Do not underestimate a woman's ability to take Pop Song of the Moment and run it into the ground.

9 - Gypsies. Fuckin' gypsies.
6 - It's a very shitty job.

Agreed 100%

10- Anyone will come up to the register with a "defective item" and try to get a discount!
11- Easy to steal from ( happened millions of times when i worked there) and everyone working will just stare, and dramatically say "OH Noooooooo". but not do anything!
12. People like to whine bitch and complain to you for an hour, but when you offer them an exchange they just refuse, saying that you've already ruined their children's lives and nothing we can do will ever correct it....fucking cunts.
13. "Where is the cellphone section?" "Oh, it's at the front of the store." "... We were just there, we didn't see it." "Right. There. Underneath that big sign that says 'CELLULAR PHONES.' " "... Where?"
People drive shopping carts just like they do cars. You seriously need to watch yourself or you'll get ran over!
16. Angry Black women are in fact, a real sterotype.
17. Always wash/Sanitize your hands after touching a shopping car. This applies double for stores like Wal-mart.
1. Working in sexshops is both fun and terrifying.

2. Weeaboos. Fucking weeaboos.
1. Working in sexshops is both fun and terrifying.

2. Weeaboos. Fucking weeaboos.

More fun, I used to put on a fake gay voice whenever we got prank called.