The Sue Brigade: A Mary Sue/Marty Stu Parody RP

The two infiltrators latched onto the ship like a bear about to rip off the outer skin. Darth Zaminn sliced the skin like hot butter with his saber. He carefully removed the portal and set it aside. He slipped through the hole and a cloaking device displayed a hologram of an uninterrupted wall. He latched himself to the ceiling. As Darth Zaminn was making his way down the hallway when he found a locked blast door leading to the Captains planning room. He made his way inside and was accessing the resent logs when he heard someone begin to enter in the access code for the door. he had to act quickly but he paused to think of a disguise. The lieutenant came to access some pertinent file, he paused for a moment noticing the unusual bear statue in the corner began to investigate but found nothing. The lieutenant left the room. Darth Zaminn uncloaked himself and chuckled, "A box of oranges, they never notice them." He found what he was looking for: these pirates were a point of contact for the Evil Desu to organize their attacks, but he couldn't find the next meeting location or the source of the sponsor. Perhaps that could be found elsewhere on the ship. Zaminn made his leave but not before leaving a surprise for the Captain later on.
***
As Pirate Captain of the biggest and nastiest ship he was the Dread Admiral of the fleet, Captain Levasseur had the reputation befitting a Dread Pirate. Sir Mix-a-bunch was brought before him in chains. "Coward," yelled Levasseur. Sir Mix-a-bunch coward in fear." Retreating when the enemy has opened up their weak point," chastised Levasseur, Sir Mix-a-bunch stuttered in response, "I will NOT have this nonsense in my fleet. Take him below, give him a 'Mandalorin bath' and one piece of candy from my stash for his initial bravery." The hardened crew responded quickly to his commands. He thought to himself, "We must have caught him off-guard he doesn't seem to have any particular plan in action." How could he have surprised such a genius, but sometimes even the best can slip-up?
 
CONTENT WARNING: Violent and possible sexual content

"Bottle Smash Magic Jutsu!" cried Raine, pelting her tentacled foe with an array of boozeless bottles. Broken glass splashed upon the slimy bastards as they writhed in agony. Raine's victory was not withstanding as a slimy creature wrapped its gooey appendage around her sexier leg - the right one.

The tentacle flipped her into the air, triggering her special magic jutsu. "Super Nauseous Supreme Puke Magic Jut - " Raine managed to sputter out right before belching on her enemy. The acidic vomit seeped through the tentacle, dissolving it before her eyes. She did a half-somersault, quarter-back flip, quarter-smooth as fuck landing onto the palace floors. Moshi and Mochi leaped from boob space, an extra-galactic dimension that existed between Raine's left and right breasts, and began their Secondhand Intoxication Magical Transformation. The two ramlets grew into full-grown ram beasts within moments.

"Take d-down the -" Raine puked a little, but quickly wiped it from her mouth so that she may continue. "Take down the rest of the tentacles. I'm guuuh-gonna save the Queen." Mochi and Moshi proceeded as commanded. Raine ninja-ed away towards the Queen, who was surprisingly holding her own. The two made eye contact and nodded at each other in confirmation of being bad ass bitches. Raine spat on her hands then place them on the floor.

"Take This Magic Jutsu!" Rainbow bursts from the tentacles in a magical array of explosions and flower petals. A couple of chunks of tentacle guts and "special tentacle juice" got on her face but that didn't phase her, mostly because she was too drunk to care. A couple of the surviving tentacles raced towards her.

"Fuck You Magic Jutsu!" Raine cried, tossing up her two middle fingers in glory. Beams of Justice leaped forth from her gesture, eradicating the monsters before her. She chuckled to herself, feeling proud that she was smoking some major tentacle booty. Her eyes felt a sudden glaze as she swaggered forward to help the Queen.

"Aye, bitch! Nice going!" the Queen said, complementing Raine and all of her efforts. Raine smiled to herself. She did it. She had controlled her drunken jutsu and saved the Queen all the same. There was a since of pride she felt deep down in her kawaii heart.

That was until a random tentacle she had failed to notice came out of nowhere and ripped the Queen in half. Raine's kokoro proceeded to skip a doki as she puked in agony.
 
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It is a legend that it takes two to tango, but Darth Zaminn has heard nothing from his counterpart in the long silence. he has managed, in his free time to count the exact number of pirates on board, light three fires that no one has noticed yet, stole all of their underwear and make a tail for the ship out of them, and rustled the jimmies. He laid back in the silence of the outer hull of the ship as his programming expertise gave him a first-hand account of the captain's plans. He watched as the captain moved into the view of his hidden camera that he set up in the map room. The captain looked at the map before he spoke, "he must want us to make a move, and he seems to be testing us rather than trying some bold maneuver." The captain, still puzzled, drew up his plans. he intended to draw the flanks away from the star base giving his veteran ships a chance at it. He didn't intend to win the battle, so the cost of his troops was inconsequential. what he really wanted was a chance at Darth Zaminn. Darth Zaminn made his way back to his ship were he sat down and had a cup of tea.
 
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MAKURA 枕ちゃんはかわいです!ほんとうです!

"Dango, dango, dango," Makura beautifully sang like a flock of fleeting doves in her waking. She rested peacefully on something soft while a melodious and airy chorus consoled her with the main theme of Dango Daikazoku. She was so comfortable she struggled to open her eyes, but she decided that it was really best to wake up--she needed to see what glorious beings had also watched Clannad all the way to the end. To her surprise the owls, in fact, were her minstrels. They had gathered around her and were hooting the song as they bobbed their heads back and forth. Makura discovered that the bed she was sleeping on was a shrine the owls created of bird feathers, train debris and... were those owl pellets?

Makura jumped to her feet wildly shaking and brushing the owl puke off of her super kawaii sailor senshi dress. "Ew! Ew, ew, ew!" She squealed in a high pitched but yet unbelievably cute mew. The owls, who were previously in beautiful harmony were surprised that Makura was both alive and did not appreciate their offerings. They began to hoot in a confusing disarray and waddled about not knowing what else to do with their lives now that they did not succeed in pleasing their goddess Makura. One owl even randomly combusted in its perplexity, it's last word being "hoot."

Stepping over the mass of befuddled owls Makura looked over the scene. The train was in shambles. It seemed to Makura that she had slept through the arrival of the Hogwarts rescue team. They were in the process of helping the wizards and witches into emergency flying cars and bringing medical supplies in on broomsticks. As Makura approached she heard one of the wounded teachers sitting on a cot groan, "Alright, who didn't pay their tuition?"

A student with a broken leg across from her replied, "With that many owls, I would have thought that it was the alumni organization asking for donations." Then he started a serious coughing fit. It was hard for him to breath since the air was still thick with the burning of the train's complete supply of coal. The atmosphere was groggy and made everyone's voice struggle to sounds--everyone except for Makura, of course. She still sounded clear as a wedding bell on a beautiful June day where the sun is brightly shining and the kittens are playing and there are ducks, and a beach, and a waterslide, and a wedding cake.

Makura put her hands on her hips and puffed out her chest. All these poor people. They had lived their entire lives up until now without owls and now they have enough owls for everyone plus their mother's uncle. Makura took in a deep, satisfying breath of clean air (her sueness purified the air around her) as she inconspicuously stood in a tent of seriously injured and even dying people. She'd done them a huge favor.
 
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Trigger Warning: Sexy Times / Gore

Zulizuzu gritted her teeth as she slashed through the snake-like appendages surrounding her. She was kind of sad to have to kill them all; they looked like they might be gummy-worm flavored. Maybe she could keep a small one as a pet!
The mare's train of thought was interrupted as she was caught from behind by a super-slimy green tentacle. Why the fuck was she on the ground anyway?
"I HATE green apple flavor!" Zuli shouted in disgust as she beat her wings in frustration.

The tentacle whom will be from this point on be referred to as Sven swung her about mockingly from one hoof, waving her around willy-nilly in the moist air. Even though Zuli was the bestest flyer and only honorary Wondervolt in all of Equestria, she was not accustomed to being upside down and soon became quite dizzy. Sven noticed her eyes start to spin all around in her head as Saturday morning cartoon characters tend to do, and thrust her to the ground, trapping her body with his slimy appendages. She lifted her front hooves a little to find herself covered in the same gooey off-white liquid smeared all over the floor. Mmmmm..

Zuli had never thought about it before but the tentacockis were kinda cute. Like in the way that your best friend's older brother is kinda cute but you know she'll get so totally pissed at you and think you're gross if you say anything to her about it; so you steal his socks and look in his bedroom window while he's up all night studying, and find out what music he likes so you can make him a mix tape that you'll never give him, and even take secret photos of him while he's asleep.
Or maybe no one else did that and Zuli was just a freak.
Anybutts, The super alicorn thought it was kind of cute that Sven thought she was cute and so she decided to consent to the phallic aberration's advances. She knew the dangers of having unprotected sex with a monster designed soely to reproduce, but Zuli is a silly pony and didn't think about that at the time. Also: everyone else was doing it, so why the hell not?

...

Tentacockis Majoris: a creature with an unfortunate resemblance to a giant throbbing phallus; created for the sole purpose of breeding, brimming over constantly with fertile seed; unable to quench it's insatiable lust and need to coat all it's surroundings in baby gravy. Sven was merely a tentacockis, nothing extraordinary about him except the hyperactive libido displayed across all of his species; and yet, he felt something growing inside of him as he thrust unceasingly into this little pony.What was growing was not his cum-filled vessels, or his veins already full to bursting with blood, but the size of his heart.
As Zuli's haunches swelled and receded like a tidal wave as orgasm after orgasm exploded through her body, Sven released his strangle-grip on her midsection and curled her into a sort of embrace as he thrust in and out of the verdant mare.Zuli arched her back as a huge wave of orgasmic pleasure shot through her, her eyes shooting wide open.

"Oh, I'm Princess Cassandra, by the way!" Zuli heard through wide-eyed pleasure as she saw a particularly dry-looking purple tentacle dive into the palace tile as if it were a drill cutting through dirt. A rumbling shook the concrete foundation as tile chipped away from the tentacle's underground path. Suddenly everything turned into slow motion as the purple octopod shot up from the ground precisely where the Sue named Cassandra's legs were parted slightly from her skidded halt.
The purple tentacle went in dry, debris from it's tunnel still clinging to it's phallic form.
It did as all tentacockis were designed to do: fuck without mercy.

Zuli was shocked at the sight before her, Cassandra's screams drowning out any pleasure that had once filled her brain. That monster.... Sven was one of them. They could never stop pillaging virginal sues, it was simply who they were. Zuli had been such a silly pony. She heated up her wing tips with fire magic as hot as Celestia's sun and cauterized Sven's tentacles in half. Zuli sprang free of the Tentacockis' grasp and flew towards the Sue Cassandra, hoping she wasn't too late.

Sven lay dying. His appendages, burning from cauterization, swelled bigger and bigger as the never-ceasing fluids started building up inside of him. All at once he had discovered the feeling of loving and losing love. This is very complicated for a creature who had never known anything but insatiable lust, so it was a pretty big deal along with suddenly being killed by the love of his life. As soon as the thought occurred that he could no longer take the agony of his own broken heart, he flopped over a little bit and burst into a sticky puddle of seminal fluid and blood. Le gasp. Much tragedy. Very wow.

Zuli dashed to her fellow Sue, but it was already too late. Her pain undiluted by the pheromones, Cassandra was split literally in two by the ruddy tentacle. Guts and semen were strewn from the poor sue's body. It was totally disgusting. The tentacle writhed in irritation, it's host unable to carry the monster's eggs due to her being all bloody, lacerated in two, and being dead and such. The invertebrate turned it's sights on the alicorn, it's need to impregnate not satisfied by the previous Sue slain and bloody on the desecrated tile. The enraged tentacle monster could not smell what was already inside Zuli through it's irritation, that she was already infected with the Tentacockis' curse. It lunged for her haunches, but Zuli was faster this time. She took to the air and dodged the monster in a light-speed zig zag motion. The tentacle became entangled in it's self , forming a huge knot. The slimy creature fell to the floor and began to swell; meeting the same fate as Sven.

Zuli was determined to avenge her. This sue named Cassandra, slain only for the tentacle's disgusting need to reproduce.
This was Zuli's calling.
She would kill them all, no matter what...
She would kill ALL THE TITANS.
Sie sind das Essen und wir sind die Jäger!


I mean tentacles... She would kill all the tentacles.... Yeah.
 
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COLE

The carriage shuddered to a halt. Well, to the unbelievably handsome villain, that's what it merely felt like. The lights flickered off, creating darkness all around. "Lumos Maximus" He whispered, tapping his wand on his leg. His compartment lit up as if everything was normal, except the horrendous amounts of owl feathers absolutely everywhere. Seriously, what the hell just happened?

He could hear groans of pain, but he only laughed. Pulling back the curtains, he saw a bunch of mangled bodies and the rescue squad. Looking down at his legs, he saw a massive slash down his shin, seemingly made by a glass shard from the window beside him. It felt as if he just scratched himself. With a quick flick of his wand, it healed straight back up again.

He gave a mild cough as the black smog that surrounded him usually had actually turned to a black smog of coughing fits. It didn't help that there were feathers even in his pants that were tickling his crotch. He stuck a hand down there awkwardly and fished them out. Just then, a nurse walked in and gasped, and fled from the cart, cheeks crimson with embarrassment. Cole's porcelain cheeks flushed a deep red and he gave sheepish laugh. "It's not what it looks like!" But the nurse had already left.

He could sense it - there was a good guy on board. And by good guy, he didn't just mean the snotty Gryffindors, but an actual good guy. Or girl for that matter. He quickly stood up straight and tried to hunt down this good guy. Wand out, he wandered down the passage of owls and bodies, in search for this villainous hero.
 
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Raine stood mouth agape in shock. The tentacles retreated in victory. They had taken the lives of many Sue and Stu brethren as well as their homie Queen, by far the greatest of losses. Raine fell to the floor, much disappoint.

"I... I failed them all," she wept. "Had my eyes not glossed, had my attention been better..." Her face looked to the heavens as she shouted dramatically.

"I COULD HAVE SAVED THEM ALL!" She laid on the floor and pounded her fists and feet in a royal tantrum. The sweet, savory princess tears streamed from her face like an anime on CrunchyRoll: interupted every few seconds. After a few minutes, she laid sprawled on the floor in a star-shape, the saddest of all shapes. You could kinda see her pantsus if you were low enough to the ground, but there wasn't a swift enough pervert that could do so without alerting Raine's ninja senses, so in reality you couldn't.

But Raine was stronger than this, thanks to the love she had for Kakashi. She pulled her cellphone out from phone space, a space very similar to boob space but was only accessible after paying a monthly usage fee to Verizon Wireless, and quickly dialed Kakashi. He quickly picked up because Raine was his bae.

"Raine, my sweet dove. Whatever is the matter?" questioned Kakashi.

Raine cooed "You will always love me, right Kakashi?"

"Of course, my love," whispered Kakashi. "You're my main bitch."

Raine smiled. Kakashi always knew how to cheer her up. Her hand went to go touch herself but she stopped herself because she remembered she was surrounded by the decaying remains of her fallen comrades so it was a little inappropriate. Instead she decided to go find Zuli to make sure she was alright. She said good-bye to her beloved and shook that sexy ass all the way outside where she found friend.
 
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MAKURA-CHAN! みなさんはまくらちゃんをあいして!!

Makura had been so wrapped up in admiring her new land of owls, she'd completely forgotten the reason she was there in the first place. Standing in the middle of the rescue tent she stood and pondered why she was still there in the first place. She'd already seen the owls. Was there another reason she was there? She used her massive super kawaii doki doki brain power to think about it, but nothing came to mind. So, turning to the tent of injured staff and students she struck a time-halting pose, with a peace sign and her butt pushed out making her tail look super fluffy and cuddle-worthy, that forced the entire tent to stop what they were doing and admire her.

"Protecting the universe with love and cuteness, I am Sailor Universe at your service! I'm so glad to have helped all of you today achieve your dreams!! And don't forget! Super kawaii is the best kawaii!!!" The last part was something she made up on the spot. She was so proud of it when she was done sparkles and rainbow angel wings came out of her back to celebrate her smartness. The confused crowd in the medic tent start a slow, confused applause as Makura used her super smart angel wings to fly out of the tent. "Hmm... What great deed shall I do next?" Makura wondered as she pulled out her Dragonfruit DokiPhone 23 and browsed her DesuBook profile. Completely ignoring the smoking remains of the train she crashed, Makura watched a really cute video about a seal.
 
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"Bestest friend!" Zuli heard an elegant voice call to her from behind. She swiftly turned around and the air was filled with a peculiar scent.
"Dude, you smell that? SOMEONE WAS BONING!" The super smart Raine observed, trotting up to the Alicorn as she spoke. "No way holmes." Zuli denied, pawing at the ground with her hoof. "It's this nasty jizz all over the place stinking it up." Zuli honked unabashedly to add emphasis.
"Yeah, maybe..." Raine replied, crossing her arms like a cool tsundere.
"I just came out to have a good time but honestly I'm feeling so attacked right now!" The alicorn pouted, all flustered and hot-like.
"Wtf the fuck?" Bemused the Ram-Elf.
Suddenly tears started to well up in Raine-sempai's eyes again. "Z-Zuli I..." Raine stuttered.
"What is it Sempai??" Zuli questioned, fearful of the worst. Maybe Kokoro had died in the battle. Maybe the tentacles had killed EVERYONE inside. Maybe Raine and Zuli were the only survivors and they would have to repopulate the earth together. Maybe they were out of doughnuts back at the house.
"Kouhai..." Raine started with much sorrow in her voice.. "They got the Queen Homie... idk what we're gonna do like lol."
"OMG" Zuli languished. "wtfroflcoptorspaghettisauce..."

"We should go take care of the others..." Raine sighed, and turned to face the doors that could house any number of possibilities.
"But first..." Zuli fished around in her saddlebags and pulled out her Dragonfruit Dokiphone 22 (She needed the upgrade so bad she could just die omg).
"Let me take a selfie! :D"

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It took Zuli quite a few tries to successfully take a picture to capture all of herself in her true glory. Well, almost her true glory. 1) the effect is always stronger in person and 2) If she unveiled her true awesomeness, the phone might break and her contract was not quite up (Curse you Verizon Wireless) so she couldn't get the DragonFruit DesuPhone 24 when it came out.
"Lemme see it." Zuli handed Raine the phone.
"Fuckin rad. Put it on DesuBook bro. That old profile pic you have of the two of us from 9ever ago is embarrassing af." Raine made a face that would have looked nasty on anyone else, but simply made her look more lovely.
"Aight." Zuli complied, pulling up the app on her phone. It took 26 tries exactly to get the application to open. Touch screens do not work well with hooves. She ended up using her snout to pull up DesuBook. Another 15 tries and she was able to change the picture.
Zuli loved technology.

"Why do you have that tiny DesuPhone, Zuli?" Raine mused. "You need a NeighPhone 2.0"
"No way! Those are so ratchet! I'M A HIPSTER RAINE! LOOK AT MY SCARF AND NON-PERSCRIPTION GLASSES!" Zuli pulled the aforementioned items from flankspace, which was a lot like boob space but could only be accessed if you had dat plot, which Zuli did.
"I EVEN HAVE A TRIANGLE BAG! AHH FUCKING TRIANGLE!" Zuli shoved the bag in Raine's face with her magic. Raine made another face and Zuli quickly realized she was being ridiculous. The Ram-Elf had done all these things way before they were cool. Zuli went back to piddling around on her too-small phone.


The alicorn pulled up the DesuFeed and liked her own photo. Zuli was such a generous pony.
She quickly (only 20 tries!) navigated to her own page to admire how others would see her very important and sparkly profile.

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"Looks super rad as usual." Zuli huffed with as much swag as was possible for a pony of her size.
Her friend count was up by two. Kokoro must have accepted her SuperDokiDokiHEAARTOTHROOOBUUFriendsu Request.
"I'm 20% Cooler!", the green mare rejoiced. She soared into the air and did a few backflips.
In celebration she set her profile music to a Super Relevant Song.
Zuli danced around a little bit to her new profile theme. She was so fetch.

"Alrighty." Zuli swagged after she was done dancing, "Let's go in there and clean up this nasty mess."
"Aight." Rain replied solemnly. The two walked towards the gates, the sun setting behind them like an awesome explosion. The two put on shades for effect as they walked forward in slow motion, never turning around even once because they were true badasses.​
 
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As the war rages on Anng-er places himself in the one area no one else would expect; the dark emptiness of space. Trying to glimpse a single object, that does not radiate light in the depth of space, is like trying to find your ice scream after your siblings have been home for a week -impossible. Not even the deep space sonar could bounce a strong enough signal to give away his position.

On one of the heavy cruisers a pirate, Jim, stands guard for empty cells. A second pirate, Roy, spots him while on patrol. Roy states, "Wow you really must have done something to anger the captain to be guarding an empty cell." Jim responds, "Guarding prisoners has a lot of responsibility, prisoners can provide hostages, labor or information about booty." Roy eyes him and says, "but there are no prisoners." Jim retorts, "Yeah but we will get some soon." Roy rolls his eyes and says, "we are no where near the enemy, prisoners don't just drop into the prisons."

Errr-boom!

Anng-er rips his way through the side of the hull into the ship's prison. The hole automatically seals itself but two pirates stand in front of him stunned. "You are the best jailer I have ever seen."
 
Cole

Cole began checking his phone. It seemed there were plenty of alerts on DesuBook, so he was going to make a post on his own account. Since he had plenty of data left, he checked out his profile and some other . He was tapping loudly on the screen, and then made the post. Argh, he had had enough of this. No point trying to find a Perfectly Royal Princess in this mess. Their faces literally make him throw up. I'm not even joking, he projectile vomits all over the place. He stood up, whispered the words to be teleported straight outside to the temple of the Alliance of the Dastardly Evil Desu. He did the secret thingy-ma-bob and entered the temple.
 
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[BCOLOR=#993300]Hebi[/BCOLOR]

Hebi stood outside the front gates to the temple and smirked when she saw a certain wizard making his way, it was only her nature to mess with people, especially those on her side.
"$ --- Sso any n3wss about the h3roic wannab3sss?" She asked him still leaning against the gate which casts a dark shadow, the only real color being the orange of her eyes and her zodiac on her shirt which was symmetrically unbalanced with one long sleeve and one short. She also had a two-colored scarf of her signature orange and yellow. She really looked like the slithery her zodiac represented. She spoke like a snake as well her S's making a hissing sound which went with her naturally dark and cold sounding voice, more mysterious than anything. She had also received the useless posts from desu book, uggh how this annoyed her so. Everyone thinking their better than her!, everyone did! even her bllod caste set her low on the food chain well nobody was going to step on this snake again without getting a good taste of those venomous fangs. And she wasn't afraid to bite either, not by a long shot.

@TheBitterBunny
 
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Raine knew a few Magic Doki Doki Love Kawaii Super Duper Ninja Trooper Cleaning Jutsus that could clean tentacle slime in a doki. With a wave of her super elegant, porcelain, doll-like hand (not like creepy dolls, just normal ones that have really attractive features) Raine had cleaned the mess up in its entirety. Lots of her fellow princesses and princesses arigatou-ed her in gratitude. Raine blushed feverishly, kind of like how she would if Kakashi was staring at her while she showered and he had touched her boobaroos in sensuality but she quickly turned him away because she wasn't about that "before marriage" life. A sense of pride flowed through her perfect veins, so to celebrate she thought that she would make a status update on DesuBook.

Raine pulled out her phone - only the latest in ninja technology - and proceeded to log in. Once she logged on a small gasp left her lips.

"OMG NO WAY!!" Raine saw that the dastardly wizard Cole had accepted her Frenemy request. Ripe with the sweet scent of revenge, Raine knew that she must attack the foul Ebony fiend the only way she knew how. With the swiftest of ninja strikes, Raine DesuPoked him with great urgency. After the deed was done, Raine turned to Zuli.

"You ready for a DesuBook war?" Raine pulled some shades out of boob space and placed them to conceal the cool beams from leaving her eyes.
 
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At some point Kokoro had found herself back in the courtyard of the Princesses' Castle. She'd been fighting those tentacle monsters off for so long, she was nearly completely consumed by the darkness and lost track of what was happening around her. But, Kokoro was empathetic and didn't care. The simple fact was that the nasty, but yet prettier than her disgusting emo face, tentacles were gone. Suddenly, Kokoro felt a disturbance in her darkness phone case. You see, instead of buying an Autobox or boob space or some other mainstream shit, Kokoro had quite simply just encased her phone with her own looming darkness and stored it in the empty void of her heart where she could never feel it.

She had 89832 missed calls from Riku, 9313 missed calls from Roxas, 9234 missed calls from Sora, and a text from Kairi that Kokoro was too empathetic to read. All the missed calls were normal. Kokoro knew that talking to any of them would be a waste of time, even though she knew they longed for her so desperately that their sadness alone could cause a brand new dimension that could quite possibly be the next Final Fantasy game. Scrolling past the missed notifications she saw the sudden rampant activity on DesuBook. Kokoro scoffed with all the feelings of not-a-care that one could find in the monochrome rainbow. But, never the less, she scrolled through her DesuFeed.

Her eyes widened. "Oh, shit," she said, her eyes actually widening, reflecting the sullen moonlight (it wasn't actually night time, but Kokoro's eyes can't reflect the sunlight so they turn sunlight into moonlight upon impact), "Raine DesuPoke Cole! Shit's about to get real!"
 
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"Admiral if you happen to get a fix on the new apprentice's location would you relay that to me," said Darth Zaminn over the secure com-channel. "With all due respect, I thought he was with you," said Admiral Tremarkt. "Tremarkt the last time I was chasing after Sith apprentices I was an acolyte and they were screaming, 'forget this, I want to join the Jedi,' right before I turned them into a one of a kind sculpture called Korriban, Darth Zaminn out," said Darth Zaminn. The masterful strategist of the universe sipped his tea calmly as he planned out the final touches of his plans. He was going to sit there for the next several hours doing nothing but sipping his tea and allowing it all to sort itself out.
* * *
Captain Levasseur watched his forward observation with an intensity like no other. A com-officer spoke, "sir the van Qwib-Qwib has taken damage they report an infiltration team has taken their brig, or that the infiltration team is in their brig." Levasseur asked, "Ensign did you say their brig?" the ensign confirmed the report. Levasseur thought to himself, "So he has made his move let's make certain that we get him cornered and out flanked." "Order the Amidala's Ill Will to support the Qwib-Qwib I want to know what He is up to," said Levassseur. The command was sent and the Assault cruiser was on its way.
 
Steve sat alone in a park in Toronto. He saw some people having a picnic with their family and started to cry, his long brunete hair waving in the wind. "If only I could have saved them!" He shouted "Why couldn't have Zordon saved my parrrrrrrrrrrrents!" He cried out, the agony in his soul continuing to hurt him.

However, he couldn't cry for long because alien vampires started attacking the park! "Steven! We need you to fight off the alien vampires in Toronto alone!" Zordon said over his comunicator. "The other Rangers are defending Angel Grove, but they can't hold out for long!"

Steve jumped into action, he kicked an Alien Vampire in the face, knocking its head off and killed it. He then punched another one in the stomach, which ripped it in half and also killed it. "These things are weak!" Steve thought as he roundhouse kicked one into space "There is no way they can ever beat me" He knocked the last one into a street post and teleported to Angel Grove.
 
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Anng-er sits in his cells with eyes aglow with blue. A monitor descends and a face flashes on the screen. The captain of the ship says, "Fools you are losing this war to a dread pirate, all your bass now belongs to us!" Jim asks, "Sir we captured their main base?" "No... we intercepted their shipment of bass...-regardless we have the sith lord's new aprentice is custody and the dread pirate will soon overtake your puny sith lord." Anng-er sits covered in sweat and replies, "I don't think you understand the gravity of the situation your in." Anng-er's blueish glow fades away and he collapses on the floor.

Near the left wing of the dread pirate's forces a moon appears in the middle of space.

Lights flash across the control room in the dread pirate's ship. "Sir a moon just appeared on our sensors, something must have been masking it." one of the crew announces. The dread pirate shouts, "How far away is it?" "It will collide with our left flank in fifteen minutes at our present trajectory." the crew member responds. Captain Levasseur commands, "All head full!" Some of the crew give the captain looks but Levasseur knew that this moon was a cheap trick meant to force him to recklessly charge into the enemies cannon fire. Too bad charging recklessly into battle is what pirates are best at! One of the crew asks,"but sir shouldn't we just blow it up or pull back?" Levasseur pulls out his pistol and shoots the water boy. No one questions Levasseur. Levasseur wouldn't retreat and nobody shoots the moon unless they have twelve hearts and a queen of spades; Levasseur was a dread pirate he didn't even have one heart.
 
Steve warped to Angel Grove. The Power Rangers were almost defeated by a single alien vampire, so Steve did a front flip and kicked the alien vampire over, but this one was stronger and got back up! "How dare you! You should have been beat in one hit from my super kung-fu skills!" Steve yelled as he started punching it in the face and stomach. "At least my parents are still alive!" the alien vampire shouted at Steve which made him cry manly tears of manliness as he summoned the Red Rangers sword and chopped it in half.

"Oh, no!" The Power Rangers shouted as more and more alien vampires started attacking the city "Steve! We have to regroup at the Command Center!" The Red Ranger yelled because he was scared of the alien vampires, which made sense, they couldn't even fight off one! Let alone 300!

"I will fight them while you get help from Zordon!" Steve yelled, as he summoned the Power Blaster and starting firing at alien vampires. They fell over and died, but there were a lot of them left over.

"You're so brave and strong!" The Blue Ranger said as the Power Rangers ran away to get help from Zordon.

"These guys don't stand a chance" Steve thought as he summoned his Zord, the Steve Carrier Zord!
 
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(@TheBitterBunny LE POKEH)

[BCOLOR=#993300]Hebi[/BCOLOR]
Hebias glared at the "fickle wwizard" as she liked to call him since he reminded her so much of Eridan.... that ass. She hated both of these damned wizards so much. Sometimes she wondered what her old kismesis was doing without her now that she had left him to join this in her opinion pretty stupid alliance. I mean, it was pretty obvious she was far better than any of these other pathetic villians, I mean she was surrounded by people that didn't know anything sometimes she swore to gog. She snapped her fingers at him in a sassy way "$ ---> H3y!, you sssnap out of it idiot, ya look lik3 you ssaw ssomethin' disturbing" She was reffering to the bitter look on his face and the disgusting smell of puke, uggh bad breath.

She went onto her Desuubook and then proceeded to mock him by posting a really shitty edit she did on her phone.

yer_a_wizard_eri_by_aura_cat-d356n8x.jpg

Heheh... yes perfect. Marvelous, oh? He responded back.

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"For the last time Heb I'm not a fucking wwizard! If I wweren't dealing wwith retarded clowns right noww I wwould fucking travel to wwherevver the hell you are and slap you"

"Heh..."

"Shut it landdwweller"

"Fish breath"

"Lowwblood filth"

"Haha, works every time"

"Fuck you!"

";)"