The Sue Brigade: A Mary Sue/Marty Stu Parody RP

Anng-er and Darth Serious traveled like two snow globes, as they lofted in the void. As they slowly ascended into the black abyss of space from the planet's surface, Darth Serious could feel a tugging in the back of her mind like someone yelling underwater, the voice was too weak to reach her coherently. She waited and listened silently with the force to hear the call of her master. About half way to her master's ship she could finally locate where her master was calling to her. Not knowing how to communicate across the emptiness of space she decided she would use a shoe. Anng-er was somewhat surprised to be hit in the face with a shoe in the middle of space. He knew that wind spirits could communicate with each other and tell him what she said. When he looked over she pointed to a nearby rocky surface.

Anng-er silently communicates to the wind spirits through his thoughts to change direction toward the almost lifeless surface. It was quite easy to see where Darth Zaminn had landed due to the large crater he was located in. Anng-er moves Darth Serious's orb of air to envelope both Sith lords. As Anng-er commanded the wind spirits to take off he knew that they would start running out of oxygen soon. Anng-er found the station that Darth Zaminn had been launched from but something was off. The station looked abandoned, meteors and asteroids had caused some minor damage to the surface but the main structural integrity seemed intact. Anng-er found the nearest opening and pushed the air bubbles through the ship's containment field.

The opening was rectangular and must have been some transportation bay for goods and supplies. Boxes of food lay scattered and unattended. When the bubbles of air unwrapped and mixed with the air of the ship, Darth Serious commanded the computer to find the nearest med bay. After a few seconds and no response she yelled, "Computer where is the nearest med bay?" she cursed to herself, then carefully lays her master on the floor. Most Sith lords would be all too ready to destroy their Sith masters but she knew that her master would not be destroyed by her, not yet. Sith culture desired strength and while other cultures produced painting, great works or new technology Sith created strength, anger and revenge in new and profound ways. Seeing her master broken on some lifeless rock would be like stepping into a rain storm and finding the Mona Lisa in someone's back yard covered in mud: disgraceful. To summarize her motives: a med bay was necessary to speed up his recovery.

She quickly searches the room to find the nearest interface. After examining the interface for some time she turns to Anng-er and says, "We are lucky, there is a med bay a thousand feet away but something's off, the AI is offline." Anng-er picks up the Sith master and asks, "Why is that so strange? The outside looked scuffed up, a system offline should not be surprising. She opens the door to the head to the med bay and says, "It's worrisome because it is in the middle of the ship."

The walk down the hallway was relatively quiet. As they neared the med bay a screeching that sounded like metal on metal resounded throughout the ship. As the screeching stopped the lights went out. After a few seconds a humming started and then the lights came back on. Anng-er asks, "What was that, is this emergency power?" Darth Serious says in a bitter tone, "I don't know I am a Sith lord not an engineer." The med bay flickers to light. The room was relatively small with a table at the center, a few cabinets lining the walls and a tank full of some bluish liquid at the back. As soon as Anng-er placed the Sith master on the table he was scanned and a number of arms with various medical devices protruded from the roof to conduct surgery.

"I will find an operating station and try to find out what is going on, you stay here until I get back," she commands.

Since the moment Anng-er had stepped on the ship his nephilim blood had boiled. He didn't need the wind spirits to tell him a dark presence lurked on board the ship. Something old and ancient, something older than demons and angels had boarded the ship.

He heard the feet of Darth Serious running to him before he saw the blood thirsty look on her face, which conveyed the gravity of the situation before she said a word.

"There is a dragon on board…"
 
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When Anng-er and Darth Serious grew close to the dragons nest they could smell the melting steel and metal. When Anng-er walked in the room it was hard to describe. The dragon had torn through the metal and created a sphere with a ledge to rest on. A giant hole lay to his left where the dragon had tunneled from space. Across the room the dragon did not spring on them or attack which made the sight even more unnerving. Anng-er summoned his staff and without turning whispered to Darth Serious, "I will lead the dragon out, you try to find your spare lightsaber."

Anng-er's eyes began to glow blue, signaling the activation of the contract with the king of the wing spirts and a second set of wings formed on his back, made of wind spirits. He took off full speed down huge tunnel and the dragon followed banging and clawing its way behind him. He shoots out of the ship and turns to face his opponent. The dragon draws in its breath to unleash a tirade of flame but he is able to put enough oxygen in the dragon's lungs to cause a minor explosion. The explosion did little to hurt the dragon but assured that it would not breathe fire anytime soon. His wings shrink to a fourth their original size. Normally such an attack would not need the contract with the king of the wind to implement but in space the air was thin.

The ship had created a field around the hole sealing oxygen in the ship but trying to pull what little air leaked out of the ship and force it down the lungs of the dragon would have been too much for any mage besides Anng-er. He thought to himself, "it would be better to stick to hand-to-errr… claw combat." The two danced through space trading glancing blows. Although the fight was going well for him his spirit wings were shrinking at an alarming rate. As he looks around for some advantage the dragon sees an opening and lashes at a speed he did not think she possessed. He tried to move out of the way but the dragon's jaws snap his arm from the shoulder down.

A moments lapse it all it took for all the oxygen to escape his lungs. While it would not kill him the lack of oxygen would slowly halt his metabolism and then he would be at the mercy of a dragon. Bleeding and out of oxygen he reached deep inside of himself for something, anything that he could grasp. Deep inside he found a power he did not know he possessed. His whole form changed and glowed with a dark light. He had attained his true nephilim form. His face was masked by a cloth and the rest of his body was covered in armor and a third set of wings appeared. He pushed power into his staff and when it felt like the staff could take no more, he pushed more into it. The staff began to glow and give of arcs of electricity.

If anyone could follow his movements they would be able to say he threw the staff but the movement was so fast the dragon just saw a bolt of light coming towards it. The bolt passed by the dragons face, the arcs of lightning from the bolt cut down to the flesh. The bolt continued until it punctured a moon. Inside the moon the bolt created a concussive force and then and implosion. At the center of the vortex arcs of lighting split the moon where ever they touched at a molecular level. Within seconds the moon was gone.

Anng-er's last sight before he blacked out was the approaching dragon.
 
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Darth Serious was going through the wreckage when she saw the dragon come back into the ship. At first she felt a wave of anger and nausea when she saw Anng-er in the dragon's maw. Furious she looked for the nearest place to find cover, however she knew she would never get to cover before the dragon would pounced on her. As the dragon came close she called out to her master with the force. She could feel her master had already recovered but she was banking that he would be able kill the dragon while she distracted it. Then the dragon laid the mottled body at her feet and nudged it towards her. She stared at the one armed figure. The dragon grew impatient and stopped one of its claws and roars, then let out what sounded a muffled, mis-formed roar "heal!"

Darth Serious snaps out of her blood-lust, picks up the body and runs as fast as she can to the med bay. On her way to the med bay her master sees her running and commands answers, "Who's corpse is that and what is that rumbling?"

The apprentice hurriedly answers, "His name is Anng-er and he let his pet run wild."

Zaminn grumbled to himself, "Well he better clean up after it or they won't be on my ship much longer." Zaminn follows his apprentice to the med bay to try to get a better handle on the situation.
 
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KOKORO

This time when Kokoro rode the train, she wore a cloak with a hood that concealed her face. She sat in the back and when the attendants came around, she would give them a death glare from beneath her hood that near-physically said, "No, I do not want your tea." She scared the other passengers so much that they had to check her three different times to make sure she wasn't an anti-royal terrorist. Once, she herself nearly had to call security when a Blue Exorcist Stu started to try and exorcise her. It might have actually excited Kokoro that everyone thought she was so terrifying, it it wasn't for the fact that she was apathetic and really just didn't care.

Truthfully, she was too busy thinking about the game with the magical alicorn princess. Kokoro couldn't decide if it was better for her to prove her strength by winning or allow herself to lose so that The Master and mother Elsa could never send her back to that damn castle again. She didn't even care if the papers got delivered or not, which honestly was the point in the first place. She'd forgotten all about the fact that if she didn't deliver the papers The Master would punish her and, even more than that, he was probably already angry by how long it was taking her to do such an easy task in the first place. But Kokoro is a Sue, and plot holes like that happen all the time and Sues never question them and expect the same of their audience. That is the code of the Sue. So, forget what you know, or be apathetic about it--Kokoro doesn't care.

When the train came to a stop Kokoro pulled her cloak tighter over her shoulders and walked out onto the train platform, clicking her heels in rhythm to her dark beating heart. She stopped in the center lobby, taking in her new fairy-dust filled environment and mentally preparing herself for the eye-slaughtering shades of pink the faction had to offer in its oh-so-glorious headquarters. Suddenly, a loud pony honk interrupted her deeply meaningful agonization over the color pink. "BEST FRIEND! I'VE BEEN LOOKING FOR YOU!!" Zuli paralyzed Kokoro with her sublime generous alicorn shout. Kokoro was frozen to the point that goosebumps formed on her arm and she looked over her shoulder to see the zebra-pony trotting towards her as she whispered to herself, "Shit. I didn't consider that her powers of super-hotness might overwhelm me. That's my weakness."
 
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Darth Zaminn having learned the arts of beast handling from the Jedi was able to calm the ecstatic Malestrom as he approached. He appraised his apprentice for recovering him and took the time to explain what he did to the Dragon, he said, "the Jedi teach that we must reach out with our minds to bond with the creature and our shared compulsion allows us to tame these beasts, this dragon should be easier for you to control than most because of the nature of all Sith." As she tried to handle the dragon it grew uneasy and began flailing and smashed in the nearest bulkhead before Darth Zaminn could calm it. "The best deception is one you believe yourself don't let the beast believe it is in danger. Use what you have learned and grow evermore powerful," said Darth Zaminn. "Darth Zaminn on my travels I found a willing and powerful acolyte. He appeared to have made a stronger bond to this beast than I," said Iyama Serious. Darth Zaminn said, "I noticed, when he wakes tell him that while having pets is permitted he must keep it under his control or I will kill it personally."

The A.I. system flickered back to life and gave its report, "damage to hull decks 522-598 'E' section, repairs progressing, area has been sealed off and is currently under repair by automated systems. One class 3 life form is loose on deck 532 'E' section. Single life form in med bay, condition stable and ambulatory, bacta tank is currently running at 110% efficiency, automated recall has been initiated." Darth Zaminn made his way to the med bay to inspect the new acolyte. After a short observation he in-put some commands into a consul. The screen read: implant modifications: Sith appropriated exoskeleton arm, reflex package, interface package. Darth Zaminn left the Droids to do their work. "When the Crew returns we set off for the Sororitus controlled sector of the Imperium of man, those left behind will be collected by the Secondary fleet. The primary is to accompany us," Zaminn ordered to the A.I. "message sent, panty raid in progress," it responded.
 
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Anng-er wakes to a splitting headache and a flood of memories. He groans as he forces his body to sit up and face a woman sitting on the cabinet across from him. An eloquent black dress wraps around the slender figure of a woman, with black hair flowing over her shoulders. She stares at him with a look of hunger in her eyes and an enthusiastic smile, similar to little kid when she learns she has presents to open. She purrs in a feminine voice, "Master I am pleased you have awoken, the thing called the sith master has told me to bring you to him when you've awoken." Confusion and suspicion rattle Anng-er's mind as he tries to recall her face or voice. Her voice subtly flows into his mind, "Do you not remember our battle master?" The DRAGON! His body tenses, a pain radiates through his left arm, and he desperately tries to keep his body from collapsing. The woman speaks in a motherly, soothing voice, "Easy master, you're new arm will take time to meld with your body."

Maelstrom navigates the winding corridors, confidently leading her master to his destination, the control room. The metal doors slide open on unveil Zaminn, his apprentice and many imperial officers mechanically working. Zaminn turns to face Anng-er and brings the hood back over his helmet and apathetically says, "Good, your pet has brought you to me, make sure to keep her under control. If you let her run wild again I will kill her myself." Anger sparks inside Anng-er, even though he barely knew Maelstrom, the audacity of this stu to threaten his fre-nemy. Zaminn stands to emphasize his presence and squash any idea Anng-er might have of provoking a fight. Zaminn states, "Anger is a weapon I can teach you to use but if you draw it in front of me I will show you just how great the gap is between our knowledge." Their eyes locked in a confrontation of wills. Anng-er backed down, realizing that a confrontation now would serve no purpose besides inflating his pride. Anng-er breaks the tention by asking, "Where are we and where are we headed."

Zaminn reclaims his position in the chair and brings up a holographic star chart. The chart zooms in to a subset of galaxies. "We are about to enter the domain of the imperium of man. We will sneak through the Hertica galaxy, where pirates are known to prowl and make our way towards the heart of the imperium," Zaminn explains. The nerve center of the ship lights up as monitors across the control room flash red. Zaminn waves his had to bring up a close up of the enemy vessels. "It looks like the welcome party has come to greet us," Zaminn chuckles. Maelstrom licks her lips and smiles at Anng-er. Anng-er summons his staff. Zaminn stands up laughing manically, "let me show you what your anger is capable of, what the force is capable of." Zaminn raises his arms and makes a motion like he is trying to open a door. Suddenly a cruiser on the screen splits in half, spewing its crew and crashing into another cruiser. Zaminn turns to his apprentice and then Anng-er and exclaims "Let's have some fun!"
 
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Raine demanded her carriage take her to Royal HQ with the speed of Zuli at minimal wind resistance. Intelligently, she applied Newton's Second Law, their acceleration speed, wind currents, as well as gravity into an equation that would allow her to formulate when they should arrive.

"If we go at a steady pace we should arrive in 30.28423248 minutes!" Raine pondered powerfully. At the moment, her number one fear was arriving too little too late. At best: she'd arrive on time to warn her companions of the incoming strike. At worst: the tentacles would absolutely ravish the pure maidens. A shudder escaped her lush, perky, juicy, glossed lips as flashes of Mahou Shojou Elena painted the picture of what would come if she failed her friends.

Zuli, Raine thought beautifully. Please don't become a hentai nightmare.

Hope flickered through Raine's heart as she saw the headquarters through the pink cotton-candy clouds. Perhaps she could save her comrades after all.
 
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MAKURA

Makura's pout was so powerful the ancient Egyptians named one of their gods in it's honor. Don't ask her which one, though. That's not important. What is important, however, is the recent destruction in Juuban had completely demolished her favorite ice cream shop. The only other place they served Doki Doki Cream Double Chocolate Brownie Super Rainbow Sundae was on the train to the League of Heart, and Makura wouldn't go there if her life depended on it. But, as far as Makura was concerned, her life did depend on getting that sundae. Makura stamped her heel into the ground and gave her tail an irritated swish, staring down the pile of rubble like it was one of those icky goblins that keep on attacking her. Needless to say, she was one angry neko.

With a deep huff, Makura demanded to the ruins, "This is my icecream shop and I need it NOW! You are going to be back in running order RIGHT THIS INSTANT!!"
And that was all it took for the bricks and structure of the building to magically starting forming back into place. Within seconds the shop looked brand new, Makura even added on a heart-shaped entrance and a scratching post. "Now that's what I'm talking about," Makura smiled to herself.
"Makura!" a scolding voice reached out from behind her, "The whole city is in ruins and you use your power to rebuild an ice cream shop?? Now, I had thought I taught you better than that, young lady."
Makura's shoulders rose in uneasiness as she glanced behind her to see her mother, Luna, perched on top of the opposing brick fence across the street. "But, Okaasan! I really wanted ice cream!"
Luna closed her eyes and shook her head as she muttered to herself, "It's like being with Usagi all over again." Luna jumped down from the fence and crossed the street to be directly in front of her daughter. "Being Sailor Universe is a big responsibility, Makura, remember that. Sometimes you need to put the needs of others before yourself."
Makura innocently fluffed up her tail and ears to the maximum level of cuteness, "My happiness is the needs of others. If I'm not happy no one is."
"Makura..." Luna started, but before she could say a single word Makura was already inside ordering her sundae. Not that there was nearly enough time for the owner to get there, restock, or even be there to take her order, but in Sue time all of that is irrelevant when it comes to nekos and ice cream. Luna sighed and followed her into the store, determined to get through to her fluffy-eared daughter.

"Listen to me Makura. The new goblin threat is endangering the population. As Sailor Universe it is your responsibility to go out there, find the source, and eradicate them once and for all!"
"After I finish my ice cream," Makura finished her sentence with a wink. "I'm Sailor Universe. I can handle anything." As she said that golden sparkles emitted from her body, confirming her statement.
Luna let out a long sigh and tucked her head underneath her paws, trying to reassure herself that her daughter was not a lost cause. "Okaasan," Makura said with a mouthful of brownie, "if the goblins are bothering you, you can come back to headquarters with me. They have plenty of catnip, mouse toys, and all the wet cat food you can imagine. Plus, protection from those ugly baddies."
Luna shook her head and looked back up to Makura, "No, that's alright darling. Promise me you'll be safe, though."
"Hai!!" Makura squeed as she closed her eyes with joyfulness. Makura finished off her ice cream and bid her mother farewell, continuing back towards the Sugar Ocean and back to the Overseer.
 
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Raine and crew had made it without a tentacle monster in sight. Raine smiled having avoided a hentai catastrophe. She payed the pegasi more than needed for their hasty clops to Royal's headquarters and bid them a safe journey. Having made it in time, it was her duty to warn the Queen.

A loud bellow trumpeted from the distance, causing Raine's half-elf ears to perk. Because she was half-elf she heard the familiar voice long before the incredibly hot Zuli even uttered the words from her snout. Elf ear anatomy has that potential. Like, yea.

"BEST FRIEND! I'VE BEEN LOOKING FOR YOU!!" Raine felt her heart break as she realized Zuli wasn't speaking to her. But if not to her truest best friend, then to whom did she speak? Even though Raine held the potential to save thousands of lives from being plowed by fetish fuel, she had her priorities straight. Raine insisted on investigating what Zuli was up to.

With a graceful hop (it only took one because she's half-ram) she steered away from the castle and onto a building, glancing down at her pony friend. Shock and curiosity sexily swelled with her retinas.

"Is that the emotional train-wreck tramp from before?" Raine eagerly awaited to see how this would play out.
 
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Darth Zaminn had two Helarc-2 infiltrators readied for an assault on the pirates' capital ship. The rebellious scum are among the favorite targets of all Sith lords. They are violent, aggressive, war bound marauders that can sharpen the minds of Sith infiltrators in the ways of combat, while still being easily over whelmed. This was Space Ninjas vs Space Pirates, there are explosions, passion, pain, and pandas, a pound (of awesome). The Star Base held the center as two capital ships held the flanks. The infiltrators left the hanger unnoticed in the flashing laser cannons. The pirates had meet a bear in the woods. Now they were getting bear claws, it was like 8 am no one had breakfast yet, and then they would be attacked by the bear claw shaped ships.
***
The Pirate Captain paced the deck brushing bear claw crumbs off his beard. He was a Mandalorian veteran a once cooperative faction to the Sith. His lust for battle was deviant; his only lover was his gun. He had danced this dance many time but never against a Sith so strong. Sith are among the most prized targets of the Great hunt second only to true Jedi. His passion for the Great Hunt lead him to this moment, Darth Zaminn and his apprentices had no formal bounty but are targets of the Hunt, a competition held by bounty hunters ending in only one victor and one survivor. These bounties are hard, defended, and there is always two competitors per target.
 
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MAKURA

The best thing about being in cat form in a gigantic pillow fort is that you can cuddle up in any little crevice and be all snuggly and warm. Makura had a bedroom of her own, of course, but she decided that she would use it as a museum for her immense collection of smutty friend-fiction, dakimakura, and poseable anime figures instead. She had won a Nobel Peace Prize for her Sasunaru fic and so she decided she would make sure her brilliance was available for everyone to bask in. Her fans made a cupcake sacrifice to her daily for her kindness.

Makura's cuddly cat nap was rudely interrupted by a courier that dared nudge her out of her sleep. "Sorry, important business," was the boy's excuse.
Makura's tail ruffled up behind her, agitated by his ignorance. "Can't you see I am already in the middle of an important task? What could possibly be more worthy of my attention!?"
"The Overseer has a mission for you," he replied in a matter-of-fact tone, unfazed by Makura's blatant bullshit. "There has been heavy Ebony activity in one of the nearby fandoms and the Overseer would like you to investigate it."
Makura gave him her cutest kitty pout and it was so cute it blinded the courier and caused his eyes to bleed-... tears. She decided she wasn't that cruel, so she turned down the level of kawaii to match his mundane non-super-kawaii levels. The boy fell to his knees and asked for Makura's forgiveness, which she would grant him for some catnip-chocolate cupcakes--to which he humbly agreed and ran off in a blind stupor to find cupcakes, somehow. Makura then thought about him blindly making cupcakes and that amused her. Then she forgot about him and never saw him again.


In other news, Makura actually did bother to open the letter he brought to her. Most of it was just nonsense, though. People were getting mortally wounded... innocents were being captured... the Ebony were gaining an advance. All of it was just totally random stuff Makura didn't give a poop about. Until, however, she got to the postscript, where the Overseer had neatly scrawled in an ornate handwriting, there are owls. Makura stood up on all four paws and breathed in a breath of super kawaii power. No one else could do this job. Of course it had to be her. And, as Sailor Universe, she had to go and liberate the owls! Or, like, whatever. But owls, though.

"Don't worry, Minna-chan! Makura-chan is on her way!!" Makura announced to the whole room. "Hogo-wartsu, here I come!"
 
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"Is that the emotional train-wreck tramp from before?" Zuli heard a voice call out from behind. That voice could only belong to one half-ram half-elf. "Raine!", Zuli cried out! Now her BEST best-best friend and her NEW best-best friend were all here TOGETHER! It was the luckiest day of the super Alicorn's life! "Now all of my friends are here!" the zebra honked joyfully. "We should all play the game together!"

Kokoro scoffed a little and averted her eyes. She looked super annoyed. Not quite as annoyed as you would be if 30 people started an anonymous campus-wide board post-war about whether your fucking amazing spiky turtle-shell backpack is acceptable attire in a college setting but less annoyed than you would be if you were in a lecture and that one asshat is in there raising his hand and talking more than the professor the whole hour of class so you have no idea how to do the homework for that night.

Raine looked confused. "Game? I have to keep the entire universe from becoming a Gaia E-RP!" whined the ram-elf, flailing about wildly.
Raine was a silly pony. "Okay you don't have to play of you don't want to. You can keep score!" Zuli bounced up and down happily.
"How can you keep score of tag?" Kokoro huffed apathetically. Then she realized she didn't want the pony to answer because Kokoro didn't care.
"I dunno but Raine is so amazing and arithmetically correct that I bet she could figure it out all by herself!" Zuli beamed with pride in her BEST best-best friend. "Right, Raine?"
 
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Princess Cassandra~Sailor of the Sun, Stars, and Moon.
Cassandra walked slowly into the hall of princesses and looked over the jeweled walls. She smiled softly as her dress dragged behind her in a regale way. The heels clattered in a delicate way as her hips swayed into the building and she looked around and stood in the center, hands folded politely and looking over her shoulder for someone to talk to.
 
KOKORO

Kokoro seized the moment. While Zuli's attention was on the ram princess, Kokoro snatched the chest for the super hot alicorn, just barely avoiding her rays of hotness quick enough to receive merely a super sexy second-degree burn. She front-flipped past them, showing off her moonlight-white legs to the entire station as she landed like a floating raven's feather, and then bolted towards the station's exited. She was almost outside of the exit when she heard the supreme royal voice honk, "Leaving so soon, best-best friend?!" Kokoro felt Zuli's rainbow magic clutch at her, expecting seething pain, but instead was met with a new hairdo involving a pink and purple tiara, at least ten ribbons, and glitter--way too much glitter. Kokoro stopped in her tracks, paralyzed by her loss of soul-draining apparel fashion points. Her incessant need to be emo erupted inside her like a black hole in the universe. She promptly dropped the chest and began frantically pulling at the bows and tiara, but it was no matter. She tried so hard, and got so far, but in the end it didn't even matter.

"Don't be sad, best friend!" Zuli sang as she trotted past, picking up the chest as she went. "You look adorable!"
Kokoro fell to her knees and angrily muttered to herself, "I had to fall, to lose it all, but in the end it doesn't even matter."

She watched the zebra-pony gallop irresistibly out of the station and just out of view. But, Kokoro decided she would not accept failure. With her onyx fingernails she scratched into her heart, revealing black ribbons that enveloped her Sailor Moon-style, but instead of pink or rainbows it was black and grey. All the cool flips and stuff were there, though. It's not a proper magical girl transformation without flips and shit, even if you are a child of darkness--even Kokoro knew that. Some of the princess who were passing by gave Kokoro nods of approval at the amount of cool flippy thingys that she did. Kokoro finally gave her final pose, revealing her heartless form. With her newfound power she melded into the shadows and raced after Zuli at the speed of darkness. She caught up with Zuli at the courtyard and sprang out of the shadows directly in front of Zuli's hooves, causing her to gracefully honk in surprise and lose control of her magic, swinging the chest across the brick road. The box hit the bricks with a crackling thud and caused it to crack open, revealing the papers within to be exposed to the breeze still blowing from Kokoro's swift shadows. Kokoro ignored the surprised alicorn and ran frantically to the papers, trying to collect them.

The papers rejected Kokoro much like all the friends she had ever had in life previously. They flew away in the mocking breath of gust that Kokoro herself had created. As she extended her empty palm out towards the fleeting papers she whispered to herself the words of a powerful sage, "One thing, I don't know why, it doesn't even matter how hard you try."

As Kokoro held her poze of elegant agony, she heard the sound of hooves approach her, "Now look at what you've done. You completely ruined the beautiful updo I generously gave you. How do you even see through those bandages on your eyes, anyways?"

Now, one does not simply question the accessory that is eye-bandages. Kokoro didn't know what made her more infuriated, the fact that the Master would have her skinned alive for this or the fact that Zuli did not understand that over-both-eye bandages were a common accessory to the Outcasts and that it is Sue law that even though they make no sense, they make perfect sense. Kokoro broke her mournful pose to summon Metalmorph and face Zuli directly. "This was not part of the deal," she spoke with the ignited embers of hell itself.

It was before Kokoro could make another move that they were both interrupted by Raine's bell-like ram roar, "ZULI!!!"
 
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CONTENT WARNING: Sexual content

Raine called her beloved pony's name as soon as she noticed the tentacle emerging from behind her. The disgusting truth erupted all over her face, like a bad acne breakout. She had neglected to warn the princesses of the tentacle pandemic. Fucking fuck.

Raine released a kunai of Uber Kawaii Rainbow Justice on the octipoidal beast. It bought Zuli enough time to swagger away. The sexually frustrated tentacled Goliath was all but amused. Quickly it sprouted not one but two more tentacles in its fallen brother's place. Fucky fucky frick.

Raine felt the all too familiar chill go down her spine. Horrific flashbacks brought her back to the time and place her village was massacred. Those images were quickly replaced by savage tentacle sex. Blood and seed mixed as one. Moans of agony and pleasure became indistinguishable. The image on stolen ninjinities floundered within her bishojou brain. She pooped a little.

With a hip hop and a winky face, she made her way to the Queen's throne room. She was making great speed. This is typically where a half-ram fact would take place, but ain't nobody got time for that shit at the moment. Right as she entered the Hall of Princesses, Raine noticed one of the fairest maidens of all. Raine instantly recognized her powers and saw the potential she bared in slaying the enemy at the gates.

"You there!" Raine shouted indiscriminately. "My friend Zuli and the others will need your help fighting off those pulsating, dripping, wet phallic bastards out there." Shiny tears slow-motioned from Raine's anime eyes. "Her pony poon is too fragile!"
 
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KOKORO

This game had suddenly turned into all kinds of nope. Kokoro's day was just going from bad to worse--which compared to the usual meh wasn't really that much of a change. For a second, Kokoro considered going into her usual apathetic state, but then thought about her alternative of going back to the Master. It seemed to her either way she could turn out as a submissive mess.

With Metalmorph already summoned, Kokoro ran to Zuli's assistance. Being that she was already in her heartless form, she could sense the greatest concentration of darkness within the core of the monster. She turned her head to Zuli, "The only way we can defeat it is by attacking it at it's core. If you can distract it, I'll try to get close enough to strike it down." Kokoro thought that Zuli would be more attractive anyways, considering the fact that Zuli had a higher hot-guy-asking-you-out crit rate.

Zuli took a big step back, "Aw, look at you best friend, trying to come to my aid. But, as it seems your current choice of accessory prohibits eyesight, you might not realise that we're both proving to be wonderful distractions at the moment--not that your eye-scarf is not dashing. Does it come in green?" What Zuli said was true; the more the princesses chopped off the tentacles, the more tentacle monsters formed--and they were slowly growing larger in size. A shiver went down Kokoro's spine and suddenly she had that everything-on-my-body-is-a-tentacle feeling, much like when you spot a cockroach in your room and then suddenly all the little tingly feelings all over your body make you feel like cockroaches are crawling all over you. "Are you sure you wouldn't rather like a headband?" Zuli snorted as she tried to cast a barrier spell around the two of them. Kokoro scoffed darkly, "You preps will never understand."

With both palms on the ground Kokoro focused her darkness to summon heartless outside of the magic barrier, but unfortunately for her, many of the princesses were mistaking them for enemies too and started attacking them as well. Kokoro was too apathetic to care though, they could do what they wanted. Slowly,through the waves of tentacles, the pair began to be overwhelmed. Since Zuli's shield was made from her powers of super-hotness, it attracted more tentacles than it repelled and Kokoro couldn't summon enough heartless to fight them all. "Is it too late to ask where you got that eye-scarf from? I'm starting to think you might have actually had the right idea. It's like the x-rated section of Newgrounds out there," Zuli spoke to Kokoro through gritting teeth. As powerful as they both were, they needed help. They couldn't fend these terrors off on their own.
 
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The bear claws stemmed the flood of pirates (they should really read expiration labels) but even bear claws would not stop the greedy pirates. Swarms of pirate ships wash over the front lines and a lucky few attach to Zaminn's base ship. The first captain's vessel to make it into the ship is led by a pirate named sir mix-a-bunch. Sir mix-a-bunch stakes one step on the deck and yells, "Go grab me the biggest piece booty you can find!" Maelstrom and Darth Serious burst from the hallway to intercept the pirate raid. "Nobody but me is taking out Darth Zaminn's booty!" Darth Serious announces at the pirate horde. The sith apprentice and Maelstrom eloquently dance through the pirates.
Seeing the onslaught of his pirates Sir mix-a-bunch retreats back to his ship and disengages from the base. "I'll pull up quick to retrieve the booty later…" Sir mix-a-bunch says to himself. Maelstrom turns to Darth Serious, "You humans have an odd fascination with butts, the rest of the body tastes much better." "Don't be an ass," Darth Serious retorts, "Aren't dragons supposed to horde booty in a mountain or something?" Maelstrom eyes Darth Serious, "No, I don't care for gold. I seek war and food." Maelstrom licks her lips, "You could say Anng-er is the biggest haul I've had in a long time." Elsewhere on deck Anng-er feels a shiver run up his spine.
 
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MAKURA まくら

"Hogo-waratsu," Makura mumbled to herself, turning her paper in different directions. Makura doesn't talk about it a lot, but she is more fluent in Japanese than English, so sometimes English things confuse her. Now, you're probably asking yourself, if Makura is not very good at English, how the holy hell did she read the Overseer's message so well. Well, I'll tell you. The Overseer understands that people like Makura speak a special language known only to the most trash of the desu--the language of the Weeaboo. In the language of Weeaboo, you can't say something is cute, no, it's かわいいです。 And when you meet a guy who is slightly older than you that you secretly like and want to annoy the hell out of, you must call him おにいちゃん。And, if you don't understand any of that; GOOD, DON'T. Turning into a weeaboo is very similar process to turning into a werewolf. It's-- just, -sigh-, just spare yourself. If you don't know what those things say, don't google it. Don't translate the page. You'll never go back. It's too late for me! Save yourself! TURN BACK N--

"There it is!" Makura squeaked at just the right time to stop the narrator. She stood right in front of the Hogowaratsu Express, hands on her hips and a determined gleam in her eyes. No one can really be sure what Makura was expecting, but , for some reason, it certainly wasn't a train full of young wizard students. Makura went to every booth, completely intruding everyone's privacy evidently searching for something. The Allies of Ebony, perhaps? Could it be Makura is actually doing... her job?!?!
"Where are all the owls?!" Makura stamped her heel into the ground, once again not actually doing what she was supposed to be doing the first place. By this point, Makura had been searching for so long the train had left the station and was chugging along the track at full speed. Which is unfortunate, because Makura then yelled, "I want there to be owls!"

Well, then there certainly were owls. Owls everywhere. Like, you get an owl, YOU get an owl, YOU GET AN OWL, EVERYONE GETS AN OWL. There were too many owls. They came from every direction; flooding the train, swooping in the train, packing in so tight all you could see were owls. Makura realized what she had released after it was too late. She opened her mouth to take back what she said, but it was too late. Owl feathers filled her mouth and she began to suffocate. She pushed through the masses of owls but there were claws and beaks everywhere, by the time she managed to get to the window she had been pecked, scratched, and defecated on. she opened the window and wind flushed out her face, as she battled the force of the raging gust to lean out and spit the feathers out of her mouth. As she did so, she felt the train begin to rock, and a horrible sound of screeching metal. Makura, along with the mass of owls were thrown back as the entire train tipped off the tracks and fell with a loud crash on it's side in the middle of a field. The last things she heard were screams and the sound of an explosion before her heart over-dokied and caused her to black out. "Gomenasai, mina-chan," were the last words she remembered uttering before she plummeted into darkness.
 
Princess Cassandra~Sailor of the Sun, Stars, and Moon.

Cassandra was standing in the middle of the Queen's throne room, her eyes scanned the fragile pictures that decorated the marbled walls beautifully. Her attention was immediately drawn to a shorter girl who looked quite upset.

"You there!" She shouted, Cassandra look around quickly, to see that nobody was there but her. "Me?" The woman asked the girl. "Can I help you?" She asked the girl. Spinning to face her, as her dress dragged behind her. The girl quickly explained the emergency and Casandra nodded. "Alright! I'm on it!" She said as she took off running before she skidded to a stop.

"Wait? Where am I going? Who was I off to fight?" She asked the girl. "Oh, I'm Princess Cassandra by the way!" Smiling, an elegant smile with her introduction.​
 
CONTENT WARNING: Sexual content

Raine ran as swiftly as her little half-ram feet could possibly go. Although she was the swiftest, most elegant of runners, she was also the ugliest of criers. Not wanting to look like a little trifling bitch, she used her Magic Make-Up Jutsu to mask her gross face. She knew that she had failed her fellow brothers and sisters. She had even entrusted Cassandra, a super elegant Sue whom she had only just met but knew that they would probably be great friends due to the fact that almost every prince and princess Sue liked Raine, to protect her dearest, bestest friend.

As she fled through the halls, Raine picked up every bottle of booze and brandy she could get her hands on, placing them into a super convenient magical pouch that can hold anything she had but was never mention of before. Even though she made an oath to her beloved Kakashi-senpai, she knew there was no other way to protect her kin. She told herself that she could have self control. It would be like what happened on Zaminn's ship. Even still, she remained hesitant. How could she be so sure?

Raine burst through the Queen's door. To her surprise, the Queen was already using her powers to defend the council. Magic swirly-do's and stars flowed throughout the queen, turning the tentacled beasts into tiny flowers and puppies wearing booties. The council had tried to help, but were too busy being pleasured by the tentacles.

"Yo, Raine-dog!" shouted the Queen in her Royal tongue. "Don't be gettin' yo ass plundered by these penis monsters." Raine nodded and went on to help the Queen.

She busted out a bottle of wine; an appetizer to the amount of whoop-ass that was about to go down. Raine might have made many mistakes up till this point, but she was determined to make up for it. Raine put the bottle to her lips. Just as she downed the wine, a monster appeared near her peripheral. She chuckled, realizing the irony of the situation. She grabbed tentacle inches away from her face.

"You know what?" Raine smiled. "For the first time ever, your going to be the one fucked."
 
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