The Story of Us (MxM)

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His book and phone tumbled to the ground, and his headphones were jerked out of his ears. Now he was only waiting for his body to hit it as well. Only it didn't. A strong arm snaked around his waist and he was caught before he could even feel a falling sensation. He opened his eyes to see who it was. "...Mark...?" He whispered. It had been a long time since he felt those arms around him. Even longer since he looked into those enchanting eyes. Realizing he was staring too long his cheeks were tinged with red. He averted his eyes and found his footing. "Thanks... I wasn't watching where I was going. Sorry." His hand was trembling as he bent down to pick up the items he had dropped. After all that time Mark still made him nervous.
 
Mark had resisted looking into Alexander's eyes because he was made so uneasy by how cold they'd become... but looking into them now, he saw hints of the old Alexander that he'd thought were long gone. He found himself getting slightly red as well, if only because of the embarrassment of the situation, and made himself look away. It's not like he was about to get the 'old' Alexander back anytime soon, "... It's fine. I... probably should have been paying more attention."

He wanted to sprint out of the room faster than he'd been jogging, but he noticed how shaky Alexander's hands were and ingrained niceness made him help pick up the other male's things. Only because he'd feel guilty if he didn't help. He wasn't looking to get back together anytime soon, "... Here's some of the stuff you dropped." he said, offering what he'd picked up.
 
He took his phone out of his hand. "Um... Thank you. Again." Man, this was awkward as hell. Painfully awkward. It would probably disappear once they talked. He got to his feet. His eyes remained averted. "I..." He wasn't sure what he was going to say. But clearly there was something he wanted to tell him. He ran a hand through his hair. "I'm sorry. I wasn't looking." He mentally kicked himself. Jeez, you said that already! "I'm just gonna go."

He spun on his heel and started for the front door. It was obvious to him now that no matter how cold he'd become, Mark would always be able to melt him. Just from one look. One touch. One smile. No matter how many times he tried to lock him out of his mind he always came back. Always.
 
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Mark would have gone out of the room if there wasn't something that Alexander wanted to tell him, and Mark was sure that it would have been a warning about things never going back to how they were used to be or... just Alexander apologizing again. No matter how cold he seemed, Alexander was still a huge dork.

"No, it's no problem, really..." and just like that, Alexander was heading for the door, and Mark should probably do the same. This was getting out of hand. The dorm was one thing, but he couldn't believe that of all the people he could keep running into, it was always Alexander. He really hoped that they didn't share classes. They couldn't have shared classes. That would be too much.

He quickly went up to his dorm, hoping that a shower mind clear his thoughts. After he finished up and got dressed again, he went for the kitchen.
 
He shut the door behind him before leaning his back against it and blowing out a breath. He couldn't believe he'd been so stupid as to bump into him. But he hadn't really meant to. It was always a bad habit. Alexander had often been scolded for walking through the school while reading a book. It was quite a skill he had built; and very rare when he bumped into someone. And this just happened to be one of those rare times. The feel of Mark's arm around him was still very fresh in his mind. It caused a weird sensation in his chest. Again he rubbed it. That seemed to get weird of the feeling. His stomach growled. Oh. I forgot to eat again. His juice and snack was still in the room. But he didn't want to go back in there. Not with Mark still there. He might mess around and say something on accident.

He pushed away from the door and headed out of the dorm building. There was a food court on campus, and although he rarely ate there he had to admit the food was extremely good (what he could eat anyways). Maybe he could get someone to make him a grilled cheese. He walked to the cafeteria and put in a request for two with a side of orange juice and nuts. The cook looked at him strangely, but when he explained his diet the male cook smiled. "Ah, that explains it. That's still a weird combination though."

Alexander offered a small smile. "Yeah, well. Even vegetarians can have bad eating habits."

The cook slid him is grilled cheese and Alexander mumbled his thanks. After eating the two sandwiches he started back for the dorm, chewing on the cashews as he walked.
 
Mark thought about eating in the food court... but he was afraid that might lead to another encounter too. It was like he was everywhere! If Mark even thought about going one place, Alexander was sure to be there too and then another awkward event would ensue. He didn't want all of college to be like this. Maybe he could transfer to another school...? And waste a whole scholarship? No, that would be insane! ... Still, all of this was one hell of a big coincidence. He'd just have to be... more conscience of where he'd be going from now on.

Mark went towards the kitchen, stopping outside of it for a moment to make sure that he wasn't there and... good. He wasn't. Not being as good a cook as Alexander, Mark settled on a baloney sandwich and some water as a meal. Something in the back of his mind bothered him about the other male, and it wasn't just how awkward things got from just a mere sight of him. How did Alexander get to be so cold? He remembered the divorce. Was it that? But he also remembered that Alexander didn't keep it a secret from him... and that he didn't contact Mark after he moved, either. Maybe he found someone better? ... But then he probably would be acting closer to how Mark remembered him.

Mark shook his head. It was clear that Alexander didn't want anything to do with him... so he should do the same. Just wash his hands of the whole matter. No more thinking about Alexander. Starting now.
 
((Okay. How do you want to plan the confrontation (alexander telling him what happened)? ))

When he got back to their dorm room he didn't see Mark. He sighed in relief and tossed the empty bag and bottle into the trash. He flopped down onto the futon-like sofa, throwing an arm over his eyes. For some reason he felt more drained than usual. Was it the current situation? Maybe. Probably. Here was his chance to finally ask Mark why he hadn't been there when he needed him the most; some closure.

Many nights he had pondered that question. He always came back to the same conclusion: Mark had gotten sick or stayed home that day and couldn't come to school. What pissed him off about that conclusion was that Mark rarely missed school unless it was for competition, and he knew without a doubt that he didn't have a game because he would have known. Mark would have told him. Even if he hadn't he would have surely noticed. All the athletes were at school that day. So, the reason for his anger was the one day he really needed him to come to school he didn't! And this is right after he told him he would always be there when he needed him! What the hell!

Anyway, in this current situation Alexander knew it would be useless to ask. Mark was avoiding him like the plague (and it wasn't like he was doing the same), and Alexander was so jaded now that he just didn't want to be the one to bring it up. Even if he was the one who usually brought up their issues first. This wasn't high school anymore. He wasn't the same Alexander anymore. He was just going to let everything fall where they may.
 
The next few days were filled with more and more... well, awkwardness. It was like the universe was playing one big joke on Mark by making sure, without fail, he'd meet Alexander wherever he was. Didn't matter where he was. Library, going to class, exercising, Alexander would be there. Mark tried his best to be civil and pretend that it was no big deal... but who was he kidding? This was the guy he was in a relationship before with. And while others might say that Highschool relationships are petty, it meant so much for him back then... and it wasn't like it was that long ago either, and the wounds in Mark's heart were still fresh.

Mark hoped that Alexander wouldn't come into the dorm while he was studying (he did need to keep up a certain GPA average to keep the scholarship) but... he'd probably be in here. Fine, fate won, and he was destined to be forever reminded of their failed relationship, he was sure of it... But he'd still try to ignore the huge elephant in the room that was suffocating them both.
 
When Alexander mentioned letting the chips fall where they may he didn't think the universe would take him seriously. It was as if he couldn't catch a break. Everywhere he went he somehow ended up seeing his ex. In the courtyard, going to class, leaving class, the food court, and even going to the pool (though luckily he never same him in the pool). He wasn't the type to purposely avoid others, but sometimes he couldn't help it. And the universe couldn't help but laugh in his face. It had gotten to the point that for the next couple of days he purposely left early so that he wouldn't catch Mark in the morning, and returned late at night when he was sure the male was asleep.

However, this particular day he just wanted to go to sleep. He had two major tests that day and he wasn't in the mood to sit in the library until he thought Mark was gone. He fished out his keys from his pocket. He unlocked the door. He stumbled inside and immediately dove for the couch. He groaned as his heavy bag hung off his arm. He groaned and threw it near the door. He thought he heard a couple of things fall out of it. He didn't really care. All he wanted was some rest. He flung his arm over his forehead and closed his eyes.
 
Mark, as usual, ignored Alexander. It was a bit easier with their constant encounters, but... it was always hard to completely ignore Alexander. There would always be some sort of bitter reminder that reminded him of how things used to be. Hey, didn't he promise himself to stop thinking about Alexander? It was hard to keep that promise to himself when the other male never seemed far behind in wherever he was.

... He couldn't study here. Not with Alexander in the room. It'd distract him too much. He picked up his books and got up to go towards the door, only to see something... particular in one of the books that fell out of Alexander's bag... Was that a picture of him and another boy? Maybe Alexander did move on after all. Sick curiosity got to him and, despite wanting to move on from the other male, maybe seeing who this other guy was would make him see that Alexander was far beyond him now. He opened up the book to where the picture was bookmarked and... the other guy was him. It was a picture, from that day they went to the beach. Mark was more than happy to take a picture, of what was supposed to be more of a happy reminder than what it meant now. Alexander looked a whole lot happier too, Mark had noticed that how Alexander was now was like a ghost of his past self.

"You actually kept this thing...?" Mark said, not taking care about how loud he was as he stared at the picture, although he himself was more than guilty of not having the heart to delete some old pictures of them on his phone.
 
He could feel his body gradually growing heavy. His mind slowly calmed. The sweet bliss of unconsciousness was only a few seconds away. And then he heard a loud voice. That unconsciousness fleeted away. His eyes fluttered open. He removed his arm from his face. "Can you keep it down? I'm trying to-" His eyes widened at what he saw. Mark was standing near his open bag with his book in his hand. However, it wasn't the book that caused his eyes to widen. It was the picture he held in his other hand. He could only think two words. Oh, shit. He sat up from his position. His voice was calm and controlled when he spoke."What the hell are you doing, Mark."
 
By now Mark had dropped the book, staring at the picture. Mark thought that Alexander had decided to forget all about their relationship.... now he wasn't so sure, "... I thought you moved on, Alexander." Mark said. He finally turned around, looking right at Alexander, "What's with you? First you act all cold and distant like we never had anything... but then you keep stuff like this?!" Mark said, flashing the photo, "Do you actually feel guilty about how you moved and just forgot all about me? Is that it?"
 
In the time he had known him Alexander never recalled Mark ever yelling at him, nor did he remember the male ever looking so furious because of him. It was a first for him. So, for a moment he was taken aback. But only for a moment. He wasn't going to sit here and let Mark continue to yell at him like he had lost his mind. And certainly not when he was wrong. "You obviously thought wrong!" He yelled back angrily, now getting to his feet. Alexander didn't lose control on his emotions easily, but with all the things that had happened to him in the past year he was more than happy to remove the lid. "And clearly I haven't forgotten since I still have the damn photo, which you can obviously see from going through my things. I'd say it's hard to believe that you could jump to conclusions so easily without bringing it up, but that would be lying. And you're fucking acting like moving was my damn choice! You don't know anything! So get off my back Mark!" Man, he was so angry. He'd even cursed; something that was as rare as him falling asleep on a test.
 
Mark was as used to Alexander yelling at him as he was to hearing Mark yell, which was not very much. Alexander, as quiet and cold as he seemed, finally burst with emotion... he'd never seen Alexander like this. Then again, he was sure that Alexander never saw himself like this either, "You didn't choose to move, but you sure as hell chose to cut off all contact! You didn't even tell me that you moved! Do you know how many times I tried to contact you before I just gave up because you never answered?!" All those repressed feelings about what he felt, starting from when he first panicked from not knowing where Alexander was, were coming undone, and he couldn't keep a solid grip on them anymore.
 
"No. I don't!" He didn't know how many times Mark probably called, but there wasn't a doubt in his mind that he had. He could recall imagining over and over what Mark looked like. Was he devastated? Was he depressed? Did he even care? Those questions haunted him just about every night. He ran a hand through his hair. "I give up." He was tired of yelling. He wasn't much of a yeller. He didn't have the endurance to keep it up. His voice was a lot more controlled this time. And scarily calm. It was as though he hadn't lost his temper thirty seconds ago.

"That day I went home early I was told the divorce was finalized. That man who I later found out wasn't my real father finally got what he wanted: to be with his new family. I told him I wanted to stay with my mother. They sold the house, and we moved out of the country for a little bit because of her job. I didn't know we would leave the city, let alone the country, but we did. I thought about telling you the moment I found out, but you know I like to discuss serious news face to face. I only had one day to clean out my locker. That particular day you wasn't there. That man cut everything. I no longer had a cellphone. That's why your messages wouldn't go through. And there was no need to get a new phone if I was leaving the country."

He crossed his arms and clench his jaw. He was no longer looking at the male in front of him. "So, Mark. You really don't know anything. All of your thoughts are false accusations. Instead of asking me to get closure, which you now had the opportunity to do, you chose to believe that I moved on, that I chose to leave, and that I chose to stop contacting you. Or how I kept the picture because I felt guilty about suddenly moving and forgot all about you- because that makes sense, by the way. It's great to see just how well you knew me. You probably thought something like he must have not wanted to break up with me to my face so he switched schools instead of maybe it's related to the divorce or something must have happened for him to be gone so suddenly."
 
Mark's emotions slowly cooled down as Alexander explained what happened during that time Mark was separated. Much of his anger dissolved into guilt for letting his emotions get the best of him, "I..." He wasn't sure of what to say. He wasn't sure about if he should say anything. He had made himself look like a huge asshole in front of Alexander, "... I'm sorry." there was a big pause before he continued, "I... I had no idea that happened. I mean, I knew about the divorce, but..." another pause, "... I wasn't at school because of a family emergency. But if I'd known that would have been the last day then... No, actually... I guess ifs don't really count for what actually happened." Mark was finding it hard to put together the right words, if there were any 'right' words at this point. His brain was scrambled from the cool-down of his outburst and knowing what actually happened now.

"In all honesty... I thought both, Alexander. I was so... worried." Mark wasn't as good as the other male when it came to being calm and 'in control', so there was a break in his voice, "No one knew where the hell you were. I assumed the worst until someone mentioned that they saw a moving truck in front of your house, but other than that I didn't know anything. I didn't know anything for so long that I guess I... sort of made up my own answers." Alexander said, "... I'm sorry. I said I'd be there for you, but... I wasn't right when you needed me most. If I'd been at school then this whole damn thing wouldn't have happened."

He turned around, intending to walk out. He thought that Alexander wouldn't want to see him, not after how he'd just acted... and he didn't want to end up breaking down in front of Alexander.
 
So he'd been right. Mark had no choice but to stay home. It couldn't be helped. He sighed. "It couldn't have been helped. Even if you had gone to school that day, I still wouldn't have found out where I was going until I got to the airport. Contact would have still been cut off. I'm sure we would have still ended up having this same discussion. Only less dramatic." He ran a hand through his hair. "It probably would have been even less dramatic had I called you the night before. But like you said, if's don't count since the actions have already been enacted." He offered a small smile. "This is the first time we've had a major argument, huh? Feels weird."
 
Mark stopped himself at the last minute, staying to hear what Alexander had to say. He kept himself together, and turned around as he saw Alexander smile, "... Yeah. I mean, we might as well have been high-school sweet hearts." he commented before chuckling at the idea, "I guess it was only matter of time before something happened, we were way too sappy." he joked, "... You're starting to look more like the Alexander I knew."
 
"Yes, we were." He agreed. A heated argument was long over due. He remembered hearing from classmates how bad it was when couples or even close friends didn't fight. If you don't fight then something is seriously wrong, he would hear them say. At the male's next statement his eyes narrowed slightly, but that small smile didn't leave his face. "Try not to compare me to the person I once was, Mark. Alexander Wynne is dead. He was weak." He had dropped his father's last name. "I'm Alexander Kade."
 
Oh, right, his father. Mark didn't blame him for disliking him, from what Alexander had told him anyways, "What I meant was, well... You seem... kinder." he said, "... But I guess at this point we can't keep looking into the past. To a better future? ... And a better start as roommates?" He said, offering his hand. He wasn't looking for them to get back together, but... he was hoping that they could at least be friends.
 
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