The Great Iwaku Race

At this time U.N. started to get nervous. "Ah c'mon...This isn't the time." He shook his head clear of everything and saw how pumped the racers and crowd were getting. With a smile, he closed the helmet, and got ready to jam. "If I don't win this year...bah who am I kidding, I'm obviously going to win." He listened closely to Mr. Nevv, and hearing that it had been banned made it even more exciting. "Do your best, Cardbo."
 
"Ladies, gentlemen, and... things, start your engines!" Smoke and exhaust filled the air. The roar of engines was all that could be heard. The noise and smoke awoke the traveler, who looked around before quickly putting the helmet on.

Three women in tight clothing came to the right of the starting line, each holding a flag.

"Ready?"

"Set?"

"GO!"
 
Kat turned on the nyan-mobile and it purred loudly. She savored the last pre-race moment, and sped over the start line, leaving a rainbow paint trail in her midst.
"Whoo! Let's go racing!" She screamed out of the window, a line she'd heard all the time in her childhood on tv. She turned on the nyan-mobiles' s speakers and blasted the miku-sung theme song. She was in some of the leading iwaku racers, but not in first. She hummed with the tune and left her window open so the breeze could go through her hair. Her smile was so wide, it was almost disturbing
 
Cheekis got off to a slightly later start than the rest. His tanks treads spun and dug into the ground because of the sudden acceleration. The vehicle quickly lurched out of the trench it created and sped off after the leaders. Ahead of him he could see a ranbow car leaving a trail of paint behind it. He was boxed and had to drive through it. His treads turned pinkc and blue.
 
"ALRIGHT!" Blasting from the finish line, U.N. wasted no time getting in amongst the middle racers. He kept an eye on that tank, not sure what it would shoot. "Alrighty....Targeting systems are up..." He skated in between racers, the benefit of having a suit was being thin enough to do so. Nobody could see it, but he was grinning from ear to ear.
 
Kat looked up at the road, which had become really dusty and rocky. The nyan-mobile's ride became really bumpy. They went over a bump that was so big, that If Kat wasn't buckled in, she would have hit her head on the roof. The vehicle kept leaving a rainbow trail behind them, and it was moving at a nice, fast pace. Kat's vehicle were in the top 10 at this time, but other vehicles were gaining. They were approaching the first dangerous mission also.
 
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There was a low, primitive scream as several beasts, disturbed by the roar of engines, burst out of the snow and ran after the racers. Some pounced at the cars, others tossed large chunks of snow and ice. "Yetis... Wonderful." The traveler sighed before rolling down the window and tossing a bomb at the guy in the fancy metal suit.

"Looks like the locals don't take kindly to our racers folks! They better watch out, study's have shown that those claws can tear through thick steel plate! And to the racers, you are about to enter the ice caves! Try not to get lost in there!"
 
One of the yetis launched itself at Cheekis tank. It's claws left a nasty scratch along the left side before it fell off. "Nyet!" He grabbed the turret control stick. "Be of suckings on this!" At this time his tank was right off the Nyan mobiles right rear. His turret traversed 45 degrees and fired. The projectile flew just a foot over the drivers head. The projectile, a stainless steel bottle of alcohol, impacted a yetis chest as it jumped over the Nyan car at his tank. "Ha!". He increased speed and matched speed with the Nyan car, driving side by side.
 
With a fluid movement, U.N. redirected the bomb into a yeti, who soon exploded, turning his fur black. "Hey, man, that wasn't very nice!" He sped up quite a bit, trying to pull ahead and aimed his arm at his bomb throwing opponent. "You should really pick that garbage up!" From his arm fired metal shurikens shaped like the three recycling arrows. He knew they wouldn't do much but it gave him time to move. But, out the corner of his eye he saw a figure leap at him and next thing he knew, he was tumbling on the ground with a yeti and ultimately falling behind. "Agh! GAH OOF FAAH! SON OF A B--OOH!"
 
Kat ducked her head as the bottle went through her vehicle.
"WHAT THE HECK GUY?" She said out the passenger side window. This guy was trying to pass her and there was yetis crawling all over the place. She growled and smashed a big red button on the dashboard. A cannon came out of the nyan mobile and started shooting explosive pop tarts at the yetis.
 
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The traveler ducked out of the way as a steel bottle and shirikans flew at them. "Oh, by the way. It's Cheshire." He mentioned to his driver. As yetis were ether exploding or jumping at things he grew nervous. The Russian nutter was not helping matters. He looked back at the track and found they were approaching a cliff. "Turn you lunatic!" He grabbed the wheel and made a sharp left, entering the complex ice cave system that ran through the mountain.
 
Kat snapped back into reality and maintained the wheel again, maneuvering the nyan-mobile through the icy terrain. "SsSsOoOoORrRrRrRyYyYyYyY ChChChEEeEShShShIIiIIIiiiiRRrrRreEEeee!!!! IiiiiImMMM KkKKkkKAaaAATttTT!!!" She said, bumping over the tons of ice shreds. Luckily the tires were pretty much indestructible, unless torn by a courses blade on purpose.
 
After fending off the yeti, U.N. found himself in dead last. "God damn bombers...stupid yetis..." He sighed and started up again except this time, his suit changed on the fly. And receded from his body and transformed into a sleek motorcycle, which he plopped into the seat of. He took off now, the motorcycle was overall faster but much less defensive and offensive. It wasn't long before he was gaining on the group ahead. "You cheeky racers...You left me behind!" He pulled forward, up next to the tank and then in front of it. "Your tank sure is squeaky man...You should oil it." He pressed a button and the suit returned. Jumping up, he rode the barrel of the cannon and sat up there.
 
Cheeki saw the turn coming and adjusted accordingly before entering the caves. The tanks metal treads slid widely on the slippery ice. He was only kept straight by the tunnels thinness. He noticed the guy in the suit had hitched a ride on the barrel. Cheeki popped the turret hatch. An AK-47 rifle in his hands as he rose up and pointed it at the other racer. "You may want to get off, comrade!" He was a little insulted by the comment that his tank was unnecessarily squeaky.
 
There was a sudden rumble. Mr. Nevv appeared to be saying something extremely important but his voice was muffled by thick walls of ice. Small icicles started raining from the roof of the tunnel.

"It's fine. Thanks for letting me hitch a ride by the way. Was looking forward to this but my car broke down last minuet." Cheshire noted the rumble and looked around. "What was that?"
 
"Haha, bullets won't do much to this suit but...With how things are looking now, I don't want to be this close to the ceiling." He waved and jumped off, starting to pull forward. He was now among the top 10, trying to keep his steering straight. The turns of the cave were horrendous, and he ended up hitting the walls several times. He frowned upon hearing the small icicles hitting his suit, as it was probably a foreshadowing of what was to come.
 
"I don't exactly know." Kat said nervously. She pressed the button to stop the pop tart cannon. It wasn't really doing its job on automatic. "Next time, can you shoot the pop tart cannon please? It was really acting pitiful." They still weren't totally out of the icy part of the race, and their place number was dropping.
 
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Cheeki went back into his turret. One giant icicle fell right in front of him. "CYKA!" He shouted in terror as the tank smashed through the giant spear of ice. The ice acted as a ramp and he went airborne for a few seconds before landing. Checking to make sure he was still alive, he breathed a sigh of relief. He again took the controls and maneuvered through the cave as it got wider and bigger. He was 9th place.
 
"Got it." Cheshire replied, nodding his head.

As Unknowledge hit his wall, something seemed to move on the outside. A gigantic slitted blue eye opened and stared down at him, then at the others.

It's owner's thought process was this:

"Ahh... A ten-thousand year nap sure makes you hungry! Eh, what's this? Breakfast in bed?! Sweet!"

The rumbling increased and the exit was in sight. "Crap crap crap... Look, the way out! Gogogogogogogo!!!" Cheshire yelled, pointing at the exit of the cave.
 
"Bwaaaaah!" Kat yelled, making a sharp turn to make the exit. The nyan mobile went on two wheels and narrowly avoided a big ice rock, then shot out of the exit. The moment they got out, she looked behind and saw that they were still leaving a rainbow trail.
"Hey Cheshire? Should we, uh, turn that off?" She asked warily.
 
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