The Curse of the Wounded King

You and this sorry lot of milkmaids, backbiters, and halfwits? That pox-addled whore threatens you to your face, the fool of a bitch! I've told you what I know, you horses's ass, and if you don't believe me, then you can go stick your dick in the bitch's beast, for all I give a damn!"

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I love you lots Asmodeus.
 
Everybody picks on the girl with the cat :'( lol
 
Funny things happen when you collectively threaten the lives of nine Medieval mercenaries.
 
*Tristan starts poking Sable's face with a stick*
 
We now have Barbarians moving to the South with a Northern order paid in Western Gold.

All we need to find out is that they all wore Eastern clothes and we will have officially proven the Hillfolk are extremely well connected.
 
*stares at the clusterfuck*

Right...


1. The Caldane Order were on a pilgramage and had only just arrived in the area to dig for relics. I don't know why one would have a grave in Elswich Village, let alone an elder of the order, who would be buried on consecrated ground.

2. If Sable is the one who is meant to have killed him, then are you implying that he lived in Elswich and this is where you killed him and suffered your ordeal? And if she ran away from Elswich how the hell did she find a tiger in these parts?

3. You've made a member of the Caldane Order a rapist and sodomist, which kinda puts a damper on the whole these innocent monks were slaughtered by barbarians theme. I stated in the opening paragraphs of the IC that the Order is comprised of pacifist advisors whose core belief is that body and mind can be perfected without violence.

4. Why is a Barbarian spying on us? The Barbarians are simple murderers led by a chieftain with delusions of religion. They use brute force, not espionage. It makes no sense for them to spying on a ragtag bunch of mercenaries who are no threat to them. And even if he was a spy, why did he choose to try and sneak up on you in the graveyard when you obviously have a tiger and 9 allies nearby?

5. Marrow stated that the Barbarians got their steel from the southern borders. Sorry to ruin the plot, but it's the SOUTHERN kingdom that has armed them, not the north. And since most barbarians would be illiterate a scroll in northern dialect would be a very poor way to communicate with savages.


I like it when my players take initiative. But this particular plot twist needs a lot of ironing out.



And Ultima... you've left Marrow the Barbarian on his own with a sword because you... think... he can't cause... any more trouble....?


*reaches for his whiskey*
 
Look at what you people put poor Asmo through. You're gonna make him an alcoholic before we even get to page 3 of the RP!

I'd be sorely tempted to have Marrow show just how much trouble an injured barbarian can cause, except that that'd probably wind up with him dead by one of the more competent members of the group, so I'll just sit here and wait til we get this straightened out before posting again.
 
I'm waiting on the perfect moment to release Prianne back into the crazy wounded world :) I'll keep updated as we go along. I'm pretty sure Asmo is going to make a good entrance point for me, but if he doesn't, please don't forget about me completely! <3

Edit: Since Prianne's description wasn't added in before (sorry!) Here it is :D

Character Name: Prianne (goes by Pri for short)
Gender: Female
Job/Role: Assassin/ Horse Breeder
Age: 23
Pic: View attachment 12422 View attachment 12454
General Appearance:. Prianne is tall with fair skin and long black hair. She normally keeps her hair tied with a piece of leather, a long pony tail that reaches the middle of her back. Her face is adorn with perfectly placed freckles that give her a homely/innocent look. She has green, deeply passionate eyes with black lashes. Her body is trained and strong, years of brutal training leaving scars on her back and shoulders. Prianne normally wears tight leather and medium fabric, light enough to keep her from overheating in the sun while tending her horses, but thick enough to protect her skin if need be. She tends to wear thick soled boots and silver bracers.
Current Goal/Purpose: She is bound to an underground group of Assassins, but is currently trying to break free of their control and find a new role in life.
General Personality: Prianne is reserved and enjoys the quiet. She would rather be alone than with others, and tends to distance herself because of her “night job”. She is more of a thinker than a speaker but will let someone knows when they are wrong. She takes direction very well, but that doesn’t mean she enjoys it. Sometimes she can get into a bad state of mind, becoming brash and sometimes rude. During the day, when she is allowed to work with her horses, she is kind and caring, but that quickly changes come nightfall-when she is required to be disconnected and ruthless.
General History: Prianne was abandoned as a child and raised by a underground group of Assassins. As she grew and gained their trust, she was given a day job to breed and sell horses for farm and use in battle. She grew to love her horses, replacing her lack of family with the equine companions. As repayment for her “passion” she was forced to kill off her last remaining relative, who she came to find out was her father. After finishing the job, she went through his belongings and found out he was trying to locate the five wounds to reunite his family. Feeling remorse, she took with her all his belongings and since that day has been thinking about escaping the reach of the group she works for.
 
*Opens a tab at the bar, leaves the bottle with Asmo and takes his keys.*
 
*stares at the clusterfuck*

Right...


1. The Caldane Order were on a pilgramage and had only just arrived in the area to dig for relics. I don't know why one would have a grave in Elswich Village, let alone an elder of the order, who would be buried on consecrated ground.

2. If Sable is the one who is meant to have killed him, then are you implying that he lived in Elswich and this is where you killed him and suffered your ordeal? And if she ran away from Elswich how the hell did she find a tiger in these parts?

3. You've made a member of the Caldane Order a rapist and sodomist, which kinda puts a damper on the whole these innocent monks were slaughtered by barbarians theme. I stated in the opening paragraphs of the IC that the Order is comprised of pacifist advisors whose core belief is that body and mind can be perfected without violence.

4. Why is a Barbarian spying on us? The Barbarians are simple murderers led by a chieftain with delusions of religion. They use brute force, not espionage. It makes no sense for them to spying on a ragtag bunch of mercenaries who are no threat to them. And even if he was a spy, why did he choose to try and sneak up on you in the graveyard when you obviously have a tiger and 9 allies nearby?

5. Marrow stated that the Barbarians got their steel from the southern borders. Sorry to ruin the plot, but it's the SOUTHERN kingdom that has armed them, not the north. And since most barbarians would be illiterate a scroll in northern dialect would be a very poor way to communicate with savages.


I like it when my players take initiative. But this particular plot twist needs a lot of ironing out.



And Ultima... you've left Marrow the Barbarian on his own with a sword because you... think... he can't cause... any more trouble....?


*reaches for his whiskey*

1-3. Woref was retired due to mental disease which I was going to elaborate on further, but he was still always like a "brother" to the Order.

4. Ever heard that you get smarter with age? Who's to say they haven't wised up? Even Orcs have intelligence. Plus I only did it because I was getting annoyed by all the "she's hiding behind the cat" trash so I proved them wrong.

5. MY point was that HE was nomadic since I said "most recently lived".

*grabs knife and towel*
 
Okay, the mental illness thing is fine. It's strange that no one warned you in the other monasteries that the guy you were moving in with was a batshit insane ex-member. And we're to assume that you were imprisoned in Elswich, travelled away, found a tiger, then came back to the place where you were sodomized?

Who's to say they haven't wised up?
*raises hand* And even if they have "wised up" why would this barbarian tribe, which is heading south, suddenly decide to send someone back to a village they have just destroyed, in order to spy on people who they have no knowledge of?

MY point was that HE was nomadic since I said "most recently lived".
... so.... the spy is someone who lived in the west and didn't belong to the hill tribes at all, and has now come to the village to spy on us... even though he's not connected to the attack... and has orders written in northern dialect from someone who's supposed to be in the south...?



And I appreciate that people were saying that you hide behind your cat, but this was IN-CHARACTER, and should not have provoked a retaliatory scene from you in which you beat up some random NPC and caused a succession of plotholes. This is a creative collaboration, not a playground. If you think you have to get one up on the rest of us with every scene you write then this is clearly not the roleplay for you.

You joined as a sadistic power-hungry loner who threatens everyone, and now you're telling me that you can't deal with the in-game consequences of that choice? If you're getting "annoyed" by in-character actions, then I'd prefer you didn't post anything at all.
 
Why does everyone cite medical problems whenever I disagree with them? :/


Okay, Tracker, since you've become inexplicably angry in a short amount of time, I think it's best we write you out. This roleplay clearly isn't fun for you.

We'll have your character leave the group and go on their own way. If you want to rejoin after your life stress and hospital visits are over, then send me a PM.
 
Okay, Tracker's most recent post has been edited now. Check it out if you want to see some character development.

Ultima, I also tweaked the end of your post slightly to account for the new actions.



Right, let's get rounded up, people. It's time to move out.
 
No internet today, will reply tomorrow. Have I mentioned how much I hate touchscreen phones?
 
I'm tempted to ask if I can take up the responsibility of two characters.... But I'm not sure if that is something that you all would be interested in doing...
Tristans group seems large enough, but I was thinking about playing a reaccuring bad guy/girl. some one to just pop in and out of the adventure to fuck shit up. Kinda like a Gark Oak sort of thing :P

Let me know lol
 
Esthalia. I'd say wait till our group i a bit more cohesive. We're still pretty divided as is...a recurring bad guy and a group of cronies would totally kick our asses right now.

Wait till after the Barbarians and we have our first item...then we have more to fight for.