The Chinese have cloned a Unicorn

Discussion in 'THREAD ARCHIVES' started by Asmodeus, Oct 3, 2013.

  1. First picture released worldwide

    There is a big problem today because Chinese scientists have created an evil unicorn pony. Chinese eyes squint in horrible calculating power and today we see the extent of their Satanic abilities. They have used the DNA from ancient sources to recreate unicorns, a cursed creature God wiped out during the great flood.

    Only months ago, there were horrifying reports of a real life unicorn woman. She had sin implanted straight into her forehead by the power of Satan. Obviously, these times were prophesied in the dangerous Harry Potter movies and we can see Satan is wanting to extend fantasy magic back into Earth.

    The problem with unicorns is that they hold Satanic power and are homosexual creatures. There is only one sex of these creatures, which is why God wiped them out in the first place. In the times of old, Satan likely used his limited power to cause a unicorn to be the first hermaphrodite animal. This is why these queer creatures have only one horn on their head, to symbolize homosexuality. Homo is the word for One in Greek, a culture who believed in having Democrat orgies with boys and unwilling adults during public bath houses and were wiped out because of their nastiness and false god worship.

    Across China, there are cults of Re-em worship building up. In ancient times, Re-em was the predecessor to the evil false god Ba’al. It means “magical ram” and in the book of the Exodus, King Pharoah uesd the power of Satan to allow his magicians to do parlor tricks. They turned rivers into red wine. They brought miniature plagues. They caused great evils to fall upon the land. They did this with viles of parched unicorn blood, giving them great abilities.

    Now that these creatures walk the Earth again, it is our responsibility to make sure they go extinct. If you see one, just shoot it. Do not feeds its meat to the family dog or make jerky, because it is filled with a inherent Satanic essence. When you consider that China has been doing experiments to craft the unicorn essence straight onto their men, you know the true power and applications of these beasts.

    Let’s make sure they go extinct again. Otherwise, we’re just paving the way for Satan to mount a white unicorn and lead his Chinese armies in an invasion upon our holy land of America.
  2. Eat a spotted dick, Assmo.


    America fuckin' LOVES unicorns.
  3. That's the ugliest baby animal I've ever seen.
  4. I always thought a unicorn was a rhino with anorexia.
    • Like Like x 1
  5. You've become what you hate.