Shut up, Cortana.

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LogicfromLogic

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She is driving me crazy.

So I got this new computer with some weird dohicky on it called Cortana. If you ever want useless searches done, ask Cortona, or don't, because she does it anyway.

Me: *typing away*
Cortana: *pops up*
Me: "Shut up, Cortana."
Cortana: "Looking up shut up."

I want to beat you. No, I did not ask for a definition of shut up, I asked you to shut up. Go away, you and your new witchery have no power here. Or you do, but what the hell are you? I know you are a search engine of some sorts but what the hell am I supposed to use you for? I have Google.

Anybody else have Cortona, and at least like her?
 

ᴛᴏᴄᴋᴀ

Melancholia Personified
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Looking for partners
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1-3 posts per day, One post per day, Multiple posts per week, 1-3 posts per week, One post per week, Slow As Molasses
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Whenever my boss decides to let me go home. (Usually between 5-11 EST)
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Advanced, Prestige, Douche, Adaptable
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Male, Female, Primarily Prefer Female
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Modern, Futuristic, Paranormal, Fantasy, Medieval, Romance, Horror, pretty much everything.
Nope, I uninstalled it off my tablet which is running Windows 10.

It's almost as bad as Siri, which my children discovered on my husband's work phone the other day. I walk into my room to hear "I'm sorry, I cannot find any contacts by the name of 'I farted'." Followed by my daughter telling Siri to go poop her pants. And this is why technology should not be given to children.
 
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Windsong

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Have her on my tablet, my desktop, and a laptop.

Literally no problems. She's there. But never says a word.
 

ShatteredSkies

Let's Get Dangerous
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,
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It seems she's gotten worse after her rampancy kicked in.
 
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LogicfromLogic

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"Cortana, I need blog sites."
"Blood Types."
No you idiot, I know my damn blood type I said blog sites.
Log sites.
I hate you Cortona.
 

Spaceguitar

I am King of the Wicker-People
DONATING MEMBER
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, , ,
Posting Speed
1-3 posts per day, One post per day, 1-3 posts per week, One post per week, Slow As Molasses
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Omnipresent
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Give-No-Fucks, Advanced, Prestige, Adaptable
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Male, Primarily Prefer Male
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Syfy, Fantasy, Modern, Magical, Horror
Cortana, Siri and I have shared...

...

...

...

Moments.
 

ᴛᴏᴄᴋᴀ

Melancholia Personified
Invitation Status
Looking for partners
Posting Speed
1-3 posts per day, One post per day, Multiple posts per week, 1-3 posts per week, One post per week, Slow As Molasses
Online Availability
Whenever my boss decides to let me go home. (Usually between 5-11 EST)
Writing Levels
Advanced, Prestige, Douche, Adaptable
Preferred Character Gender
Male, Female, Primarily Prefer Female
Genres
Modern, Futuristic, Paranormal, Fantasy, Medieval, Romance, Horror, pretty much everything.
A

Alan

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Original poster
I disabled it upon installation of Windows 10.
 

Dipper

???
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Shake a tin of dice and tell me what numbers they give you.
Writing Levels
Adept, Advanced, Adaptable
Preferred Character Gender
Male
Genres
Sci-Fi, Fantasy, an assortment of Fandoms. Ask and you shall receive (an answer).
These early AIs are pretty terrible. Just wait a few hundred years, and everything should be improved.
 
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Gwazi Magnum

Previously Gwazi Magnum
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This changes too frequently to give anything reliable.
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Sci-Fi, Fantasy, Adventure.

Turtle of Doom

The Monster Under Your Bed
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,
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Fantasy, Magical, Romance, Dystopian, Religious, Post-Apocalyptic, Zombies (but the plot has to consist of more than just mindlessly murdering the undead), Steampunk
I turned Cortana off almost immediately after upgrading to Win10. We got into an argument, so I shut her up and showed her who was boss.
 
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