Sh*t my Dad Says

[Tuxedo Mask]

So what humorous things does your father or rather parents say? Here is a Twitter account with a bunch on it.

http://twitter.com/shitmydadsays?ut...tter&utm_content=twitter&utm_campaign=twitter

Anyone have some hilarious instances?

 

[Professor Crane]

Dad: Dude
Me: Sweet
Dad: Totally

 

[Corvus Corax]

All of these are said by my dad:

"Its better to be pissed off than to be pissed on."
"Head em' up move em' out." : when exiting the car.
"You make a better door than you do a window." : When view of tv is blocked.
"Chinese soup. Wanton." : When he is asked for something and the asnwer is No.


They aren’t all necessarily funny…I'd say they are...quirky.

 

[Tain]

Dad: *Watching a bunch of bikini girls on television intently.*
Me: "Dad, aren't you a little old for them?"
Dad: "I ain't dead yet, am I?"

 

[Hydronine]

ME: Oh.... that girl's kinda cute...
Dad: Nice rack.
ME: No, that's a push-up bra. It's a lie.

 

[Fel of the Eternal Forest]

Here's a throwback to Orochi that my dad actually says:

GET OFF MAH LAWN!

 

[Hydronine]

Me: Ok, seriously, can I have the Z? (Dotsan 280z, car)
Dad: It's falling apart.
Me: PLEAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAASE?!
Dad: ....Your brother wants it too, what do you want me to do?
Me: FOR THE LOVE OF GOD! HE'LL DESTROY IT! PLEASE!
Dad: You know I'm jewish. And yes, you can have the car.