- Invitation Status
- Posting Speed
- Speed of Light
- Multiple posts per day
- 1-3 posts per day
- One post per day
- 1-3 posts per week
- One post per week
- Writing Levels
- Intermediate
- Adept
- Advanced
- Adaptable
- Preferred Character Gender
- Male
- Female
- Transgender
- No Preferences
- Genres
- Horror, S&m, Yaoi,BDSM, Fantasy, Element affinities , Supernatural, Dopperlgangers, Neko's or Amima's are okay, I also Like things with wings Lately and Supernatural or Zombie type settings
(If this is not allowed im assumed it will be taken down and that is okay, I plan to express views here and kinda of test limits on what everyone thinks is normal (Not explicit!) as its confusing in America and out societies standards on sex. plus its an easy platform
So here is my view on sex, and Some people agree and some dont!
Here is my BIggest Delima and I honestly just think im me, SO I am a Lesbain African American Female, I come from a community that values a lot of commitment to sex. I dont understand why that is.
The fact that sex has to come with so Much Commitment tied on top of it makes me Nervous. I am someone who In my twenties, has two jobs, and is in school full time. I dont want to or need to commit to a relationship in which im finically or emotionally invested in at this time in my life. I have had friends with Benefits Situations but They are few and far between and some would say that kind of relationship is unfair or unhealthy, but I disagree, not everyone wants to jump into a relationship all the time, and if I have had a friend and we find physical attraction to each other and choose to explore that without engaging in a relationship I find that okay, with boundaries and Proper behavior as (Friends) between the two of you regardless of the fact your having sex with said person.
Some people find my View of sex Wrong, and Here it is:
For me, sex is Biological as it was purely when we did it back in the cave man times. We did it to progress the species and also because it felt good and I doubted there was any emotional attachment, as mammals as much as we love to think it, we do not mate for life, we just dont.
Now I am not saying we are incapable either, but to have that constant expectation that if you have sex your in it for life as I know some people seem doesn't vibe with me all that well.
My main solution to this is to simply not have sex. The view most woman I have asked and heard from (No sexual relations with them just questions) and society seem to have though is that sex requires some kind of commitment and emotional attachment, and if that is what you need that is fine and okay and im not even saying that is wrong, but i dont like feeling like im some kind of Maniac for wanting to engage with someone physically without bending the knee XD (Yeah reference enjoy it)
Im sex Positive in the aspect that I can have sex without it being a huge part of my being or having it affect me on a deeper level when it comes to my fellow girls, im happy to have sex and dont need a reason or rhyme to do so as long as I do it safely i dont find that wrong either, and if someone doesn't have sex all the time and wants the relationship they can still be sex positive too! In the end what im trying to understand is why society seems to wrap this up this way for like half of the females.
If you have sex with someone but aren't with them, there seems to be this vibe that you two are slutty or dirty in some cases based on how some people react, I dont hang around with those people obviously XD but just based on reaction/ what I've heard from friends. Things get tough when ever anyone talks about sex in any shape or form. I dont understand that either, Its such a delicate topic but its such a simple thing, Sex inst some amazing thing for me(I dont mean bad sex I mean socially XD I dont look up to it), sometimes its gross (humans have bodily fluids XD), a Little funny and Silly even, but Between Porn and Societal expections I feel like alot of people seem to hold it on this ...weird level of highness, its certainly not required to live and I find food and shelter much more important, like people, say they need to have A, B, C to have sex and for it to be good and all that stuff.
I just dont get it!! XD
I have no intention to just use someone for sex either, which is what I feel like a lot of people misunderstand when i talk about sex without commitment. You can have sex with someone, not commit and still have a healthy normal relationship with that person if you both agree to boundaries and maintain rules.
, I still respect that friend as a Person, we would still hang out as friends and they would be treated with respect, and no not everyone can maintain a friend with benefits relationship in a way that is healthy for both parties but I dont see why that has to affect me socially in what works for me and what doesn't for others.
(I say would in the paragraph above (Not because some freakish negative thing happened between us LOL) because with any friends with Benefits relationship (at least with mine) unless your both very comfortable, prolonged Benefits can be unreasonable depending on where that person is in their life, and its simple communication that ends it, no drama, its just done, With proper communication!!!
Usually, a timeline is agreed upon to keep from getting attached since its fair that both of you dont go into this thinking its just gonna be that way forever! Also not to mention one or both of you can be or will be dating other people in the future and relations will cease. Friendship can return to normal, that friend or yourself can decide whether or not they want you to meet said partner or not (as their friend) and what is done is done
Its like a weird Whirpool of madness, If you want sex but not a relationship people see you as some sex hungry fiend, or just a lustful creeper sometimes, its even worse with men but I get some of that, given the 3 decades of history where we woman were basically sold off as Portable holes to f**k (reference), but its not the current men's fault that all happened, still its a sensitive thing to even brush so im gonna move on.
as a woman myself I can see the reasonable appeal in lack of commitment but also to still want physical in Intimacy, which is defined as Familiarity or Friendship, and Closeness, but that doesn't have to be defined as a deep romantic relationship.
Even talking about sex or making my intentions clear sometimes in like playing with fire, and I am not always understanding why?
Not everyone has the same view as I do, hence why we all have our social values but I dont think I should be shamed or put down by mine either just because I dont value sex as highly as everyone else does, I still got to talk to some people about all this too see what is what, but I dont like the pressure people give to get into a relationship if you do want to have sex, I might be happy with my arrangement and doing just fine and I think that is okay XD.
There has to be a Neutral way of going about this!
Let me know what you guys think, given the situation I really dont think its that abnormal and am I honestly the only girl that seems to want this? Most people keep telling me woman dont want that, but I am a woman and I do so I find that highly untrue! XD
So here is my view on sex, and Some people agree and some dont!
Here is my BIggest Delima and I honestly just think im me, SO I am a Lesbain African American Female, I come from a community that values a lot of commitment to sex. I dont understand why that is.
The fact that sex has to come with so Much Commitment tied on top of it makes me Nervous. I am someone who In my twenties, has two jobs, and is in school full time. I dont want to or need to commit to a relationship in which im finically or emotionally invested in at this time in my life. I have had friends with Benefits Situations but They are few and far between and some would say that kind of relationship is unfair or unhealthy, but I disagree, not everyone wants to jump into a relationship all the time, and if I have had a friend and we find physical attraction to each other and choose to explore that without engaging in a relationship I find that okay, with boundaries and Proper behavior as (Friends) between the two of you regardless of the fact your having sex with said person.
Some people find my View of sex Wrong, and Here it is:
For me, sex is Biological as it was purely when we did it back in the cave man times. We did it to progress the species and also because it felt good and I doubted there was any emotional attachment, as mammals as much as we love to think it, we do not mate for life, we just dont.
Now I am not saying we are incapable either, but to have that constant expectation that if you have sex your in it for life as I know some people seem doesn't vibe with me all that well.
My main solution to this is to simply not have sex. The view most woman I have asked and heard from (No sexual relations with them just questions) and society seem to have though is that sex requires some kind of commitment and emotional attachment, and if that is what you need that is fine and okay and im not even saying that is wrong, but i dont like feeling like im some kind of Maniac for wanting to engage with someone physically without bending the knee XD (Yeah reference enjoy it)
Im sex Positive in the aspect that I can have sex without it being a huge part of my being or having it affect me on a deeper level when it comes to my fellow girls, im happy to have sex and dont need a reason or rhyme to do so as long as I do it safely i dont find that wrong either, and if someone doesn't have sex all the time and wants the relationship they can still be sex positive too! In the end what im trying to understand is why society seems to wrap this up this way for like half of the females.
If you have sex with someone but aren't with them, there seems to be this vibe that you two are slutty or dirty in some cases based on how some people react, I dont hang around with those people obviously XD but just based on reaction/ what I've heard from friends. Things get tough when ever anyone talks about sex in any shape or form. I dont understand that either, Its such a delicate topic but its such a simple thing, Sex inst some amazing thing for me(I dont mean bad sex I mean socially XD I dont look up to it), sometimes its gross (humans have bodily fluids XD), a Little funny and Silly even, but Between Porn and Societal expections I feel like alot of people seem to hold it on this ...weird level of highness, its certainly not required to live and I find food and shelter much more important, like people, say they need to have A, B, C to have sex and for it to be good and all that stuff.
I just dont get it!! XD
I have no intention to just use someone for sex either, which is what I feel like a lot of people misunderstand when i talk about sex without commitment. You can have sex with someone, not commit and still have a healthy normal relationship with that person if you both agree to boundaries and maintain rules.
, I still respect that friend as a Person, we would still hang out as friends and they would be treated with respect, and no not everyone can maintain a friend with benefits relationship in a way that is healthy for both parties but I dont see why that has to affect me socially in what works for me and what doesn't for others.
(I say would in the paragraph above (Not because some freakish negative thing happened between us LOL) because with any friends with Benefits relationship (at least with mine) unless your both very comfortable, prolonged Benefits can be unreasonable depending on where that person is in their life, and its simple communication that ends it, no drama, its just done, With proper communication!!!
Usually, a timeline is agreed upon to keep from getting attached since its fair that both of you dont go into this thinking its just gonna be that way forever! Also not to mention one or both of you can be or will be dating other people in the future and relations will cease. Friendship can return to normal, that friend or yourself can decide whether or not they want you to meet said partner or not (as their friend) and what is done is done
Its like a weird Whirpool of madness, If you want sex but not a relationship people see you as some sex hungry fiend, or just a lustful creeper sometimes, its even worse with men but I get some of that, given the 3 decades of history where we woman were basically sold off as Portable holes to f**k (reference), but its not the current men's fault that all happened, still its a sensitive thing to even brush so im gonna move on.
as a woman myself I can see the reasonable appeal in lack of commitment but also to still want physical in Intimacy, which is defined as Familiarity or Friendship, and Closeness, but that doesn't have to be defined as a deep romantic relationship.
Even talking about sex or making my intentions clear sometimes in like playing with fire, and I am not always understanding why?
Not everyone has the same view as I do, hence why we all have our social values but I dont think I should be shamed or put down by mine either just because I dont value sex as highly as everyone else does, I still got to talk to some people about all this too see what is what, but I dont like the pressure people give to get into a relationship if you do want to have sex, I might be happy with my arrangement and doing just fine and I think that is okay XD.
There has to be a Neutral way of going about this!
Let me know what you guys think, given the situation I really dont think its that abnormal and am I honestly the only girl that seems to want this? Most people keep telling me woman dont want that, but I am a woman and I do so I find that highly untrue! XD
Last edited: