Saving You

[Discordant]

Chad did nothing to stop Ellen's tirade. He flinched slightly when she struck him the first time, but wasn't that exactly what he asked her to do? The string of profanity grew more vehement and the crying more intense, until there was nothing coherent in those sounds. There were no words of encouragement for her, no pleas for her to calm down. He simply held her, letting her poor all her anguish into him.

He knew, or at least hoped, that one day Ellen would understand that she couldn't have stopped it. Both her brother and father were strong men, and there was nothing frail about her mother. If none of them could stop the burglar or call the police, how did she expect to have done more?

An avid fan of Agatha Christie novels, Chad couldn't help speculate on the hows and whys of the tragedy. How do you kill three people at once without alerting the neighbors? He knew nothing of how they died, but deduced it couldn't be gunshots. That would have roused the suspicion of the whole block, but the bodies weren't discovered until Ellen came home in the morning. That in mind, he supposed the easiest way would be to kill Ellen's brother first. If the intruder had gone to her parents' room first, there would have been too great a chance of one of them waking and sounding the alarm. Anything was possible, of course, but it just didn't seem likely. In fact, in Chad's mind the most likely scenario was more than one intruder. This was a morbid train of thought, but one he could not help jump on board of.

Pulling himself back to the here and now, Chad realized he wanted to get Ellen out of this place. There was so much grieving to do, but the ramshackle Metzger house was not the place to do it. He had a better location in mind.

"I still want to take you someplace," he said, gently prying her away. "It's a place I think you'll like. But you might want to finish dressing before we leave. I'll put these boxes away while you pick out some shoes from the closest. Then you might want splash some water on your face."

In addition to bringing her somewhere more peaceful, he had an ulterior motive as well. His father usually came home for lunch, and while Larry Metzger always liked Ellen, he wouldn't take kindly to someone wearing his wife's old clothes. This wound, still open and festering after so many years, was the one area in which his father could be unrelentingly unforgiving.

 

[Lillian Gray]

"Alright." Ellen sniffled. She wiped the tears from her eyes with the shabby corner of her borrowed shirt. "Fine, I'll go."

Truth be told, Ellen didn't want to go anywhere. There was an investigation to be had, people to interrogate and a whole lot of information to dig for until Ellen would feel like she wanted to do anything more than curl up and forget about the inherent malice of the world. She had no doubt in her mind that the story would be plastered on every morning newspaper come morning, if not in the evening news on the local channels at the very least. The triple murder of the Davis family was worth a pretty penny to the media, and would rally the support of the town just as quickly as it at all started. Be it the whir of a computer coming to life or the hasty scribbles of a journalist, all it would take was that one jotted tale of heartbreak and sorrow in the little town of Mission Ridge.

Chad seemed insistent on taking her to a particular place however, and a part of her wanted to know what exactly the man was up to. His intentions were honest enough, and she doubted it would be anything less than helpful.

Ellen looked to the floor as she shooed Chad out of the room entirely before shutting the door on him. There were still clothes to pick through, some closer to her size than others in the stacks of valuables long left behind and forgotten. Funny though, she thought, how she hardly remembered really seeing Chad's mother at all. She knew that she'd up and left the family, but for what reason was unknown to the redhead. To have boxes of her clothes left behind broke her heart to think of what Chad's father must have felt, hoping she'd come back one day.

She could almost relate. At least, somewhere out there, Amy Metzger was alive and well.

Deep inside one of the boxes she found a frayed pair of jeans which were just tight enough to wiggle into without any major issues. She finally took the time to put each button in its place, placing too much focus in the action. Her hands shook furiously, and in the end Ellen had to stop, leaving three buttons unlatched entirely in three completely random spots. One was just below her neck, the way she liked it, but the other two had spots smack in the middle of the line, and just before her navel.

She picked out a pair of worn loafers. This way, she didn't have to worry about tying up any shoelaces, or stepping around in heels that didn't fit. Even the loafers were enormous on her, but Ellen also had small feet, so she couldn't complain about the lack of footwear for the time being.

Ellen took a deep breath to compose herself before walking out of the bedroom at last. She held out a hand in search of Chad, all to eager to grip onto the source of comfort from her childhood.

 

[Discordant]

Truth be told, Chad had no idea whether or not his plan was good one. All he knew was that he wanted to give her a brief bit of respite to compose herself before the chaos ensued. In the grand scope of things, so little time had passed. Ellen found those bodies only a few short hours ago, though he suspected it felt like a lifetime to her. Yes, there would be so many horrible things to endure: questions from the police, funeral arrangements to make, prying journalist to fend off, and perhaps worst of all the sympathetic eyes of those who couldn't help but be glad this terrible thing had happened to someone else and not them. He couldn't protect her from those things forever, but perhaps he could keep them at bay, if only for a while.

When she emerged from the bedroom, he gladly took her hand. However, he did not immediately lead her out of the house. He had to take a few minutes to put the boxes away. If his father came home from lunch and found them out… Well, let's just say it would be a less than pleasant scene.

That task complete, they left the house and got back into the Camaro. By the time they pulled onto the street and headed north, Chad expected to pass his father's car. Thankfully that didn't happen. It would only have led to awkward questions.

When Chad and Ellen were eleven years old, they built a treehouse overlooking Turtle Lake. To call it a treehouse was probably an exaggeration. It was a few rickety boards nailed together at odd angles. What served as windows and a door were just the places where the lumber didn't line up quite right. Despite its lack of aesthetic appeal, the place had one thing going for it. It was spacious, at least for eleven year old children.

How many summer days did they spend up there, spying on people swimming and boating in the lake? How many deep philosophical discussions, at least as philosophical as tweens can be, did they engage in? There were tears, heartbreak, and angst, but mostly the treehouse felt like a psychological fortress protecting them from a topsy-turvy world.

By junior year of high school, they stopped visiting the treehouse. They gave it up for Chad's basement, which while not as magical, had both electricity and plumbing. Chad didn't truly know if it was even still there. Perhaps they'd arrive and all that remained would be a few shattered rungs nailed into the tree trunk. Then again, the place might have been confiscated by some kids looking for a sanctuary of their own.

As they drove, Chad did not tell Ellen where they were going. He suspected she'd figure it out soon enough.

 

[Lillian Gray]

Ellen could only make guesses as Chad continued to drive. They passed an old diner, a place they'd frequent to buy the small milkshakes. The smell of fries left in oil too long wafted up to her nose, and she sighed in recollection of the greasy burgers and over cheerful waitresses. As they went by, she dropped the assumption that's where they were going. Good, she thought, I don't think I could show my face in public.

They passed other places which held some significance to them both. Ellen stared out the window, eyes glossed over while the memories of old flooded her mind. Places they shared as they grew, old shops and tall trees, the both of which held a fair share of happy memories. Only, everything seemed a little smaller than before. Had the doors to the local grocer always been so short? She couldn't help but wonder how she hadn't noticed the change in all her years. All she could think was how different everything was. Just, different.

But, as they continued, Ellen finally picked up on where he'd wanted to take her all along. It made sense that they'd go there. The tree house was private, no one would be able to disturb them there like hordes of curious onlookers might try to.

A small smile crept on her features, hidden beneath the leftover smears of mascara and the red puffy nature of her cheeks.

"I thought it got torn down." Ellen said quietly.

There it was though, in all it's ramshackle glory. It had definitely fallen from its former glory of the older days, a few boards fell sideways along the walls of the small structure, but remained mostly intact. The door, or the hole which formed an entrance, was still there. The surrounding panels hadn't budged an inch since they'd been carefully crafted there some years ago.

"I remember it being much bigger." Ellen's grin became more obvious. "And we could go fishing just in the lake, I wonder if my pole is still inside."

Ellen waited for Chad to park his car before clambering out to gaze upon their sanctuary.

 

[Discordant]

"It was much bigger when we were both a good foot shorter than we are now," Chad said, emerging from the Camaro and scampering to the bottom of the tree. "Thank God we built it big. It'll be a little tight in there, but we should fit. I'm just amazed the damn thing is still intact."

Despite his excitement, Chad ascended the rungs with great care. Not only did he weigh forty pounds more than the last time he'd been up here, but who knew what ravages time might have visited on these boards. One plank threatened to tear lose under his weight, but the rest were surprisingly sturdy.

"Watch that one there," he said, pointing out the treacherous rung before wriggling through the opening.

To his amazement, everything was as they'd left it. A battered edition of Monopoly lay in one corner, its cover discolored and warped by the elements. Next to it rested Ellen's fishing rod, and in the other corner a stack of Superman comics waited to be read. Even the jewelry box where they kept stockpiles of candy still sat against one wall, though its contents were no doubt inedible by now. Either no one had found this place, or its ramshackle appearance convince would-be intruders there was nothing of value inside. Yet this place was a treasure trove of precious things, whose value could not be measured in money but only by the nostalgic memories they conjured.

Chad slid next to the window, turning to face the entrance. He wanted to see his friend's expression when she entered.

 

[Lillian Gray]

Ellen took a second to look around before climbing up, her lungs began the tell tale itching for another cigarette, but she ignored their wanting and turned to follow her friend. Watching the particular rung, she woman ascended up into the decrepit little tree house from their past, she pushed her head through and there was an instant bittersweet feeling.

Her fishing pole was there after all, the game of Monopoly, the candy tin. None of it had changed so much as it's position on the floor since the last time either one of them had set foot in the house.

She rested her arms on the floor of the tree house, still supporting herself on the weaker rungs below her. Chad was watching her from the corner of her eye, and she didn't want to disappoint him with a poor reaction, but forcing smiles wasn't something she wanted to try. Still, that bittersweet feeling was left over and she found it in her to make a small, but wistful smile. There were too many playful memories for her to be entirely melancholy, and the smile widened a little, remembering what she could about the place.

"It's like it hasn't been touched." Ellen commented.

She pulled herself up and sat against the opposite wall from Chad. Whether or not he'd grown, Ellen was still small enough to wedge herself inside with few complaints. Boasting a near five foot five, Ellen was just as small as she was when they'd assembled the house, and found that her spot in the corner was no different than before, adding the cobwebs from years of misuse.

"We did a really shitty job." Then, by some small miracle, she laughed. "The boards aren't even straight, I can't believe it's still here!"

 

[Discordant]

"Well, we were only eleven after all," he said, "and neither of us had dreams of becoming architects. It's amazing neither one of us cut off a finger or nailed are hands to the tree. But you're right… It's a miracle this place is still here."

Chad turned to look out the window, as he had so many times in the past. Beyond lay Turtle Lake, and this morning it teamed with activity. On the far side, a group of five swimmers, none of them older than twelve, joyously splashed one another. In the middle of the lake, a teenage water-skier desperately (and rather unsuccessfully) tried to impress some girl on the nearby pier. At the tree line just to the right, an old man lazyily cast his fishing rod, clearly more interested in enjoying the day then catching any fish. All of them were oblivious to the college dropout spying on them. And that was the beauty of the tree house. You could watch the world without the world watching you.

How odd that these people enjoyed this beautiful June morning, unaware of the misery of some of their fellow townsfolk. They frolicked in the water without a care in the world, treating today just as they did yesterday. For them the morning brought only sunshine and leisure, while Ellen endured unimaginable heartbreak. As much as we might like to think we are all connected, a great divide separates us, a divide caused by the lack of shared experience and the naïve belief that tragedy only touches other people's lives.

He turned away, finding no solace out there.

"Was this a stupid idea?" he asked. "I just wanted to bring you someplace with happy memories. I know, it was probably dumb. What can I say, I've never been one for good plans."

 

[Lillian Gray]

"It's not dumb." Ellen responded quietly.

While it wasn't a foolproof way to alleviate the growing feeling of pain inside her, it was a little piece of the road she wanted to walk, a step on the way to happiness. Paved with happier memories to cushion her from a harsh scrape in the dirt, it'd keep her going just long enough to find another stone, another piece of the path she had to follow before falling back down on her knees If she needed, she could pick up all the bits of the past and build herself a wall. Either way, there was always another step. So long as she stood sedentary nothing would change.

It was such a shame Ellen could hardly see it that way. Her emotions were still jumbled up inside, but it was enough for the moment to know that no one would judge her in the small space. She was far from the prying eyes of neighbors and police. Chad was her friend, her best friend that she hadn't talked to for two years, but they connected again without even trying.

So no, it wasn't a stupid idea. It was brilliant on his part, and Ellen appreciated his efforts to make her feel better.

"Do you remember, I fell out of the door once, a long time ago." Ellen stated.

She pointed towards the opening that served as an entrance into the tree house. It was crude at best, but it was large enough to squeeze inside and keep most adults out. Her father had never been able to get inside because he was too large, his shoulders too broad and his gut too large from one too many beers.

"I don't even remember what we were doing anymore." She said, that same bittersweet smile was painted on her face. "But I walked, right over it, and I broke my arm."

Memories would help her now. Nothing bad had ever really happened in their little house, nothing so terrible as death. It had always been a tranquil environment where two children had been nurtured, grown into the people they were now. It always had been a safe place, and by God did Ellen need somewhere safe.

Even as she recalled such happy memories she began to cry again. It was overwhelming, and very little would satiate her need to mourn and feel than to simply cry her eyes out. At least now, she was in a bloodless place with her friend.

 

[Discordant]

Chad most definitely remembered what happened the day Ellen broke her arm, because it turned out to be one of the most uncomfortable days of his young life. He'd been playing keep away with the candy tin, a pastime he liked to indulge in when he felt particularly mischievous. Only that day was different. As he held the jewelry box of goodies above his head, a silly thing to do since Ellen stood a good two inches taller than him at that age, she leaned up against his chest to grab for the candy. At that moment he truly appreciated her budding felinity, truly saw her as a girl and not just an asexual friend. He had only started going through puberty, while Ellen, as was the case with most girls, had beaten him there at least a year before.

He almost kissed her at that moment. He even went so far as to close his eyes and pucker his lips in that awkward way boys who have no experience kissing girls do. But then horror at his uncontrolled hormones overcame him, and he quickly side stepped to get away. The motion, so frantic and surprising, forced Ellen to take a few staggering steps forward to catch her balance, and those fatal steps sent her hurtling toward a date with the emergency room.

In retrospect, Chad should have kissed her. They were kids, and there was no harm in it. It's not as if it would have change anything. Well, probably not. Better the pain of a broken heart then a broken arm, he supposed.

"I don't remember what we were doing either," he lied, but seeing her tears fill the silence, he thought he should elaborate. "What I do remember is lying to our parents about how it happened. We were so scared they wouldn't let us play here anymore if we told the truth. I remember telling your father you tripped and fell down the stairs by the school. I don't think he ever really believed that story. I mean, what kid in their right mind would go anywhere near a school in the middle of summer."

Chad chuckled for a moment, remembering how they conspired on that less than plausible story as they walked home, her groaning in pain as she cradled her wounded arm. But then his face grew somber again.

"You know you can stay with me," he said in an abrupt change of topics, "I can sleep on the couch, and you can take the bed. The basement is plenty big for both of us. I don't know when they're going to let you back in your house, and even when they do… Well, I would understand if you didn't want to go back."

 

[Lillian Gray]

Ellen thought about it, and frankly, she probably would never return to that house. Not any time soon, that was to say. She wanted to sell it, to never have to step foot inside, not even to say goodbye. Her family had perished there, in a place she'd thought was so secure. The locks on the doors had always kept people out, while light conversation flowed inside, the noise of a football game floating out of speakers near the television. Ellen had grown up believing no one could come inside that space, as if it were set in stone, but not any longer. It would always be her home, the little yellow corner lot with the peeling paint, but she didn't want to go back.

"Thank you." She said in a small voice. "You're right, I really don't want to go back."

I don't want to talk about it again.

She tried to shift the topic away from the deaths as subtly as she could, but Chad probably noticed. Ellen readjusted her seat in the tree house, sitting cross legged instead of with her knees in the air. Red hair fell over her shoulders in long, tangled waves, and she picked up a few strands to distract herself, weaving them into tiny braids.

"And then there was that other time, I decided to cut my hair in here." Ellen's voice cracked even as she tried to change the topic, and it was evident she was scared to talk about the morning's events. The tears never left her eyes when she talked.

"It was almost the Fourth of July, and my mother wanted me to get it cut before we went anywhere, said it was too long." She smirked. "To think, I'd grown out of being a kid, and I thought I could cut my own bangs without a mirror to look at. I wasn't a very smart kid."

Again, Ellen shifted awkwardly in her seat. Talking felt a little more forced than usual. Normally, she wasn't an overly talkative girl, but it had always felt natural with Chad. She trusted him and understood that in all the years they'd known each other, he wasn't going to force her to speak up when she didn't want to. Even still, sitting there and thinking up stories from her past felt odd. She was only skirting the major issues, like what to do next. She had no idea when her house would be opened up again, because she hadn't asked. There was no idea either on when she'd have to go in to make funeral arrangements for not one, but three of her family members. All of it seemed so far away, when she knew in reality it would need to be started soon.

The motivation just wasn't there.

"At least I won't be falling out the door again." Ellen lowered her eyes to the ground.

 

[Discordant]

The corners of Chad's lips curled upward as Ellen recounted the hair cutting incident, but he couldn't quite manage to turn the expression into a full-fledged smile. Their relationship had always been marked by humor, usually from his end, and he wondered if today's events would forever change that dynamic. How could you smile around someone who'd experienced so much tragedy without feeling a little guilty?

Turning to look out the window once more, he saw that the swimmers had emerged from the lake and were drying themselves on the far bank. They looked so innocent and happy, though remembering what he'd been like at their age, Chad knew it was an illusion. With immediate access to all the vices and sins of the world with a few simple swipes on their cell phones, the young couldn't stay innocent for long. He wondered how long it would be before those kids heard about the break-in at the Davis house. Perhaps they knew already and just didn't care.

The forced reminiscence between Ellen and Chad felt awkward, so he searched for another topic to distract her. When he turned away from the window, he asked, "Tell me about college."

It was a dangerous subject to broach because it invariably led to questions about his own college experience. Oddly enough, that didn't bother him anymore. Compared to the slaughter of one's family, being kicked out of college just didn't seem so bad. Besides, she probably already knew he'd been "asked" to leave school last semester. While they didn't precisely run in the same circles anymore, they had enough common acquaintances for the story to have already gotten to her.

 

[Lillian Gray]

"College?" Ellen echoed. "I know despite my...tendencies, I'm doing well actually. I'm surprised it's going so well at all."

She curled one of her hands into a fist and used it to rest her head, elbow edged into her knee. Calling her new addiction to the taste of alcohol as a tendency only put it lightly. If Ellen had the time, she was often out with someone older, someone who could afford to buy an under aged girl a cheap back of Budweiser when she wanted. It wasn't always the best, some parties were better than others when the liquor flowed freely into her hands. Others were more tame, casual exchanges between a few colleges trying to relax.

In either case, her parents wouldn't have been proud to know that their shining pupil of a daughter spent her nights passing out in a stranger's home. Suddenly, she was embarrassed Chad had to know about that side of her. They'd been so much more innocent as children, and just knowing she'd turned into the woman she was now made her feel almost bad.

"Only four years left if I play it right." She commented lamely on her progress.

There wasn't really much to say. Her grades were passable, her knowledge of the subject matter decent; Ellen had always been studious as a teen. It was the freedom of doing what she pleased that turned her, with a pressure lifted off of her after having left the nest for the first time.

"I made some friends, tried to get a job, but I was too, um, busy." Again, she was embarrassed that what held her back from getting a job was liquor. "What about you though? I heard you weren't going back, but, not much after that."

In truth, Ellen didn't have a clue that Chad had been dismissed. More or less she had known that he left, but for what reason she was clueless.

 

[Discordant]

Tendencies? Chad had no idea what she meant by that. In his eyes, Ellen was always the smart one who took her studies seriously. There was no reason she'd do anything but great at college. Chad, on the other hand, got through high school mostly with her help and pure charm. Teachers, just like everyone else, liked him, so if he straddled the line between grades, they gave him the benefit of the doubt and gave him the higher of the two. He wasn't a stupid kid, just not as smart as Ellen.

And then came the question, the one he knew he would have to answer. He considered lying to Ellen or at least giving a vague answer that explained nothing, but he couldn't do that to her, not after what she'd just been through. He owed her honesty.

You see, Chad didn't get kicked out of school for bad grades. Funny how when people heard you were asked to leave college they just assumed it was because of poor academics. Not so in Chad's case. In fact he was doing quite well at the time of his departure, nothing spectacular, mostly Bs with an occasional A here and there. He learned early on that college wasn't about being smart and certainly wasn't about learning. These days, if you wanted the most up to date information or learn anything in general, the information was somewhere out there on the internet and for a fraction of the cost of a four year degree. No, college was about proving to the world you could put in the work, accept the grind, and learn how to jump through society's hoops. These were skills Chad had in spades.

"Oh, I'm a dumbass," he began with a sigh. "You see, I had this roommate… Richie De Monico, who let's just say wasn't the best influence on me. Oh why beat around the bush, Ellen. I got kicked out for drugs. Not using them, just selling them."

He said this last part as if it somehow put him in a better light. While chad certainly was a drinker, he actually never did anything else save for smoking the occasional joint. For him, drugs were a money making proposition.

"You see, Richie's father was a doctor, and I guess he stole a couple prescription pads," Chad explained. At the time, Chad had no idea how Richie got the drugs, and had he known it was in such a lame manner, he would never have gone ahead with the plan. "Anyway, so he started writing prescriptions for everything you can imagine: Vicodin, Percocet, Ritalin, Adderall, you name it. He stayed away from OxyContin because he thought it was too high profile. The problem was he wasn't very good at selling. I mean really, what kind of horrible people skills do you have to be a failure as a drug dealer? So that's where I came in. I was good with people; they trusted me. So after a while we were raking in the money.

"But I guess Richie's father figured it out, and from there the school got involved. Thankfully I was never caught with any of the stuff on me. Everything they found in our dorm room could be traced back to Richie, so I had plausible deniability. While it wasn't enough for the police to arrest me, it was certainly enough as far as the school was concerned. And so they asked me not to return the following semester."

Chad folded his hands and waited for the rebuke to come.

 

[Lillian Gray]

"Chad Metzger, you...you idiot!" Ellen leaned forward and reached across the small house to slap him on the knee. Her jab wasn't meant to be harmful, halfway between painful and playful.

Of all the things he could've done, this was not entirely what Ellen had expected. Flunking or leaving college, that was within his boundaries. Chad hadn't exactly excelled in school from what she recalled. Many days they had to stay inside, Ellen coached him on different subjects instead of going outside to do something more adventurous. Carry the two, Switzerland is neutral, all the things that were boring at least turned into a decent, and passable, C grade. If they were especially persistent, he was able to pull of a B.

She felt an odd mixture of anger swell up in her chest. Chad had never been so stupid before. He was looking less a joker and more a fool now.

"You aren't the idiot, that Richie kid is, but Chad, Chad!" Ellen chided him. "How could you do that? I helped you study for your exams, you did so well, you were doing so well..."

Ellen sat back in her corner and wrapped her arms around her knees in defeat. So that was it then, Chad hadn't left himself, he'd been asked to leave because he decided that certain financial endeavors were more important than others.

She looked out one of the slats in the window, past the swimmers are more towards the lake. At least it was there, sitting pretty as it did the last time. For a while she stared out at the slight rolling of the water and started to wish that it was all some sick joke. Her day hadn't been going well, not in the slightest, at this point she was half convinced it couldn't be real any more, but it was. It was all too real, and all too permanent.

"I don't know what to say." She finally told him. "You were better than that, Chad. I'm just glad you didn't get in worse trouble."

Had anything happened to him, there would have been serious consequences. To think, Chad could've seen jail time, and Ellen would've come home to an empty house and no shoulder to lean on.

 

[Discordant]

All things considered, Ellen's reaction could have been far worse. She wore her disappointment plainly enough, but Chad didn't think she'd hold it against him forever. He thought about swearing her to secrecy. After all, not even his father had gotten the real story. But after a moment's reflection, that seemed unnecessary. He knew Ellen better than that. She'd never repeat his story to anyone. As far as the people of Mission Ridge were concerned, he'd simply flunked out.

"I know. I know," he said, his hands raised in surrender. "It was a stupid thing to do, and I have no excuse. Trust me, I've beaten myself up over it for the last five months. There's always the possibility I can just go somewhere else, maybe a Junior college or something like that. But Ellen, the truth is I don't know if I want to. Maybe I did it because deep down I knew college wasn't for me. I don't know what is though. I've spent the last few months trying to figure out what to do with my life, and so far I'm coming up with nothing."

Chad slipped into silence, joining Ellen in peering out the window. The old man had left now, probably without having caught anything. The water skier was also gone, both his body and ego bruised by too many falls. In their place was a newcomer, Chester McIntyre. He was a couple of years older than Ellen and Chad. Chester was the kind of guy who lacked all semblance of social skills and ran his mouth off non-stop. Add to that a healthy serving of creepiness, and he was the kind of person you just didn't want to hang around. He reminded Chad of a number of questionable people he sold prescription drugs to in college. The guy was throwing garbage bags of stuff into the lake, an activity that did nothing to diminish the creepy factor.

"So what now?" Chad asked, turning back to Ellen. The question was intentionally vague.

 

[Lillian Gray]

Chad was right. Even if he hadn't said it out loud for Ellen to confirm, she'd let his unceremonious boot from college blow over. For now, she let the disappointment shine through with the slump of her shoulders as they continued to rest on her knees. She said it again in her mind, how could he? Ellen didn't have an answer. It wasn't fair of her to judge him, now that it was in the past, and it was all said and done. So long as he tried to do something, that would be enough. Of course, that was the next question, what was he doing with all his spare time then?

She followed his gaze out the window and saw Chester, dumping something into the lake. It was odd, but so was the man, and she didn't think much of his actions. He was probably just getting rid of some trash, or something equally sketchy. Chester wasn't known for being the friendliest of characters.

"You ask like I have some kind of idea." Ellen sighed. She was tired of crying, and tried to keep her eyes dry by wiping the sleeves of her borrowed shirt against her face. "I don't know."

There was nothing for her now in Mission Ridge, nothing save Chad and the countless childhood memories that ran up and down the street with her. Her family was gone, all of them. Asking what to do about it wouldn't give way to a cheery answer, not yet. She couldn't hold her head high and declare she'd move past it. That was far in the future, if she ever made it that far.

"I need a drink, something, Chad, I really just-" She reached into her pocket but came up empty. Again, she sighed, and remembered the only other cigarette was back at his house with her purse.

So much for a cigarette.

"I don't know. I'm sorry." Ellen gripped her head with both hands, keeping herself hidden behind a mask of red hair and two, jean covered knees. In all honesty she just wanted to hide there, and keep the world out for a while, but there'd be a time they would have to go back and face the world once more.

Until then, the answer would have to be satisfactory.

 

[Discordant]

"No need to apologize, Ellen. It was a stupid question," he said, looking around the tree house as if searching for something. Back at the house, some of the unholy trio of booze still remained from last night's impromptu drunk fest. However, here in their childhood sanctuary there was nothing he could offer her. "If a drink is what you want, I'm afraid we'd have to go back to the house. Kevin Wilks was over last night, and I don't think we drank everything he brought… at least I hope not. I get that you might want to drink yourself into oblivion. And if that's what you really want to do, I'll help you accomplish it, but I don't know if it's really the best idea. The call is yours though. Just know that if you're getting drunk, I'm going to be right there matching you shot for shot."

Something else was bothering Chad, a growing concern that, despite his best attempts to suppress it, kept bubbling to the surface of his thoughts. He knew he shouldn't say anything, but in the end he just couldn't help it.

"Ellen," he said, "I hate to even bring this up, but I'm afraid if I don't… Well, I'm afraid too much time will pass and then… Look I'll just spit it out. The Mission Ridge police department isn't known for being the brightest force in the state. Nothing like this has happened in town that I can ever remember. I think Mr. Everson blew his brains out with a shotgun a few years back, but that wasn't murder. My point is, they've got no experience with this kind of thing, and I'm worried they're going to botch things up. I guess I'm afraid that if it's completely up to them, they might not find the killer or killers.

"Now hear me out. I know this sounds a little crazy, but I have some extra money. My previous job, if that's what you can call it, made me a little bit of money. I've got a few thousand bucks. I didn't want to put it in the bank because I guess I was worried someone would figure out how I made it. Anyway, we could use that money to hire someone. You know, like a private investigator or something. Just someone who might not overlook the details our less than stellar police force might. What do you think?"

 

[Lillian Gray]

Ellen wanted to react to Chad's advice. Drinking seemed the only logical solution in her delirium. Everyone she loved was gone now, and if she wanted to relish in the sweet tasting burn of a bottle of booze, she damn well would. He might not have liked her choices, but at least for later that night there'd be no escape. If he wanted to match her 'shot for shot' as he put it, he'd have to simply keep up.

Bottle for bottle is more like it. Ellen thought glumly.

"A detective?" Ellen spat. "With your drug money?"

She began to shake her head from side to side in vehement disapproval. He'd spent those months earning the money, sure, and he only wanted to help. If Ellen had to at least try to make one rational decision that day, it would be to ignore his proposal outright. It wasn't something he'd earned in any legal fashion. Spending it on a private investigator only seemed like a foolish idea, and a good way to get Chad in even more trouble.

"Absolutely not." Ellen quickly shot forward on her hands and knees, tempted to stand up before she recalled the short ceiling above her head. "I'll figure it out, it'll work, it'll be fine."

But it wouldn't be. Ellen couldn't afford to hire anyone at that point. She didn't have any money, not that much. She'd wasted it all on alcohol, at least that's what she thought must have happened. There wasn't another explanation for black out nights and an empty bank account.

"I don't want to talk about it any more." She bit her lip and averted her eyes. "Please, I don't want to think about that any more."

 

[Discordant]

As much as Chad wanted to feel sorry for himself for being so decisively shot down, he really couldn't. It was, after all, a rather silly idea, but then Chad was known for his ill-formed and rash plans. How could one decide that selling drugs was a viable part-time job to get him through college without being at least a bit impetuous? Even so, what better gesture of penitence could there be than to spend that illicitly gotten money for the benefit of someone else?

"Okay," he said with a raise of the eyebrow. "You don't want to think about it now. I get that. I just wanted to make the offer, but we'll table it for today."

The shock of the morning events finally began to wear off. He could feel parts of his typical personality coming back into focus. There was the urge to combat despair with humor, sadness with joy. Chad couldn't say if his return to form was a good things are an inappropriate one, but he decided to go with it either way.

"So let's get your mind off things then. Here are a few suggestions. One, we can go back to my house and drink ourselves into unconsciousness. Two, we can continue to reminisce about the good old days. Trust me, I can do that all day long. Three, we can have a rousing game of Monopoly, but if history is any indication, I don't stand a chance against you. Four, we can have wild, passionate sex in the tree house, though I'm not sure it's structurally sound enough for that. Or we can just get in my car and drive someplace, anyplace. Like I said, I've got some money, so if you suddenly have the urge to go bungee jumping, I'm sure we can find a place. Anyway, those are just the first few things that come to mind, but I'm open for suggestions."

 

[Lillian Gray]

Ellen laughed, if only lightly, in response to his attempts to distract her. They were all viable options, some more readily available than other. Drinking required moving, which required more driving, and Ellen wasn't ready to get up and move. It translated into some of the other options. She didn't want to go driving, especially not if it meant spending the money Chad had earned from his drug operations, unknowingly to Ellen that he'd done so in the first place. As for the integrity of the tree house, she wasn't up for testing those kinds of boundaries, not really. It was Chad she was talking about, so far he'd been a good friend, and she didn't want to go and make it awkward.

"Do you think the pieces are even all there?" Ellen hinted at a rousing game of Monopoly. It might not have been as interesting as some of the other choices, but it involved the least amount of effort.

She shifted, albeit somewhat unwillingly, towards the box before settling at Chad's side. It had completely faded from the rain, but the board inside was mostly intact. The letters and colors were all but lost, if not for the slight pigmentation the sun and weather had spared thanks to the worn box. The pieces, once some kind of metal, had rusted slightly but still had their typical shapes. There was the hat, dog, a little car, the others went missing through the years, until Ellen and Chad had brought substitutes in their stead. Along with the browned pieces, there was a penny, and a peculiar shaped rock.

She didn't want to move, but playing Monopoly meant she didn't have to go as far. There was enough open space in front of them to fit the board, provided the wind didn't pick up and blow the fake money away in a rush of air. Ellen opened the box and started to arrange the pieces, setting the hat out for herself, leaving the other options up to Chad. Setting up the game put Ellen on autopilot, as she remembered the amounts and different rules, like she'd never stopped playing the game before.

"We can drink ourselves into oblivion later, I'd rather just sit here and play." Ellen sniffled, and tried to wipe at her face with the edge of a fake five dollar bill. "You can go first, if you want, I'll still kick your ass."

Plus, from the angle she sat at, it would be hardest to see the look on her face. Side by side, Ellen had her hair to cover up the emotions which played across her features. She didn't want every flicker of pain or amusement to set the tone for the rest of the day. Her feelings were far too fickle, never settling on just how to react to the news of death. A part of her still hadn't decided.

"Just don't go anywhere without me first." Ellen said quietly. She pressed her head against his arm for a bit of support and waited for her turn to roll the dice.

I just really, really need somebody, need you, today.