[Samuel x Roman]

s a m u e l​

"I am too," Samuel had no idea what would have become of him if he hadn't met Roman when he did. He thought about it sometimes, and his conclusions were always quite scary, but at the end of the day things had played out in a good way.

"I think maybe we were just what we both needed at the time," Samuel smiled, that made the whole situation feel kind of more positive. They were both kind of lost when they met and if they hadn't met at that time neither of them might have been completely happy, but they had met, had made each other's lives better.

He leaned over the table and stole a shrimp from Roman before even starting on his own food, as he so often did.

"Like I know things still aren't always perfect," Samuel said, because they weren't, Roman still had his frequent bleedings and anxiety, Samuel still woke up due to nightmares sometimes, "But that's kind of part of what makes it perfect? Like I don't think you can be truly happy in a life that is flawless? So that wouldn't be perfect.. uh, for you get what I mean?" Samuel chuckled a little, he was just kind of saying what popped up in his head, he didn't need to put much thought into his words because he was speaking from his heart, but that meant he wasn't as coherent as he could be, Roman wouldn't mind though, he knew that.
 
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"Yeah, I do get it," Roman told Samuel with a nod of his head. And he truly did. He knew that if everything was totally perfect, their lives would be pretty boring. And besides, their flaws made them a part of who they were. Roman loved his husband for all his flaws and he knew Samuel felt exactly the same way. And at the end of the day, the majority of the time, they were incredibly happy. They really had almost nothing that put a damper on their spirits.

They ate their entrees and soon their main courses came out, which looked and smelled just as amazing as the first dishes. Roman bit into his succulent quail and let out a little sigh of contentment. "Holy shit. We need to come here every day." Ignoring, of course, the fact that they most definitely could not afford to do that.

"I wonder what the kids are doing," Roman pondered as they ate together. He knew they had come out to enjoy the night themselves, but they had three children now, and it was almost impossible to get them out of their heads. And besides, they loved talking about the kids anyway. "I hope at least one of the twins has thrown up on Evan."
 
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"Wow, Evan is being nice by looking after him and you're wishing baby vomit on him?" In being a parent to three small children Samuel had become kind of desensitized to gross stuff like that and he didn't really care about mentioning things like that while eating and could enjoy the first couple of bites of his food anyways, "I hope both of them are being very nice and pleasant so Evan will want to babysit them again, but I mean, the idea of Evan getting thrown up on is pretty funny so I don't oppose too much to it,"

He took another couple of bites of his food and actually reflected over the flavours. They were fantastic, and Samuel silently agreed with Roman that eating something like this every day would be amazing. Of course they couldn't, no matter how comfortable they were with the Money Roman made Samuel doubted anyone would really eat these kinds of things every day.

"We're such dad, were on our anniversary date and we can't even keep ourselves from talking about our kids for the duration of dinner," Samuel laughed, he didn't care, he loved talking about the kids because he loved the kids so damn much, but it was till pretty funny how their focus in their life had almost completely shifted over to those three wonderful little children, " think we might be starting to get old,"
 
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"Oi," Roman said sharply, glaring at his husband and pointing at him with his fork. "We do not say the O word, especially not on our anniversary." Roman then laughed to let Samuel know he was joking. He knew he would grow old one day, but that was ages away and therefore they didn't need to worry about it at the moment. And besides, Roman was a vampire and would stay young forever. Right?

They continued to chat throughout their main course, which was delicious of course, and soon it was time for dessert. Roman was excited to try it but he couldn't help but wonder why Samuel had insisted they take it easy with the final course. He guessed it had something to do with Samuel's surprise later in the evening, and that just made Roman all the more excited to find out what it was. He knew it would be special, just like the one he had planned for his husband, which was coming up next.

The dessert arrived and Roman's mouth immediately started watering. "Oh my God, that looks amazing, I should have all of it and you can look at me because I'm way better anyway."
 
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The waitress placed their dessert on the table, it was slightly on the smaller side, because the place was fancy, but it was really prettily put on the plate. Three pillows of chocolate mousse were topped by one thin piece of dark chocolate and some raspberries. It looked fantastic, so Samuel couldn't agree with the idea of Roman eating it all.

"You're mean, I also want it, I deserve it more than you because I don't think I'm better than everyone else," Samuel joked as he grabbed his spoon, he'd honestly let his husband have most of it because he loved him and he knew Roman appreciated desserts more than him, but he still wanted a taste.

He scooped up a little dessert but instead of eating it himself he held it up towards Roman's mouth, "Do you want me to do an airplane like we did for Harper when he was little," Samuel joked, he had been feeding so much baby food to Harper that way it made the act of romantically feeding someone food feel just a little silly, so he had to joke about it. He still very much liked the idea of sharing food that way though, he thought it was sweet.
 
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"You know what, that's a really dumb idea, but I love it," said Roman. He honestly loved everything Samuel did. Only he could make spoon-feeding someone chocolate mousse in the middle of one of the fanciest restaurants in the city totally adorable. One of the many things Roman unconditionally loved about his husband was how damn cute he is, and this was just one example of that.

Roman opened his mouth and let his husband feed him the dessert. It was absolutely delicious, of course, and Roman actually closed his eyes for a moment because the taste was so amazing. Samuel had definitely made the right decision regarding it.

"Mm, holy shit that's good," Roman said, opening his eyes and picking up his own spoon. He scooped a little bit of everything into onto the piece of cutlery and then held it up to Samuel. "Open."
 
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Samuel opened his mouth and let Roman spoon feed him some of the dessert as well. It was absolutely fantastic, the chocolate mousse practically melted in his mouth and the raspberries complemented the rich taste of the chocolate perfectly, "wow okay no I'm not letting you have all of this it's fantastic,"

The proceeded to eat the dessert, Samuel did allow Roman to have more of it, he didn't have a problem with that as long as he got a little of it. Occasionally Samuel would request to feed Roman a spoonful again, just because he could and it was a nice way to show affection while eating. Sadly the dessert was eaten all too fast, but Samuel knew they'd get more to eat later in the evening so it was alright.

They lingered a little at the restaurant even when they had eaten all their food, just chatting, holding hands on the table and enjoying the fancy experience. Eventually they asked for the tab, which Samuel was scared to even look at, but it had been worth it. He was a little excited to get away from there though, simply because it was time for Roman's surprise part of the evening. Roman was really amazing at coming up with gifts and things like that so Samuel couldn't wait to see what he had come up with.

"So are you going to tell me where we're off to now," Samuel asked after they had payed and we're gathering their things to leave the restaurant, "or do I have to blindly trust you because it's going to be a secret until the very last minute?"
 
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"Yep," Roman said brightly. He was very excited to give Samuel his surprise. He had spent literal months on it, working on it when Samuel wasn't home and couldn't figure out what he was doing, and he had cashed in a massive favour from Elliot, so it was going to be absolutely amazing. And Samuel deserved that.

"You'll like it, I promise."

They left the restaurant, got into their car and drove a small distance to a theatre, smaller than the one Hairspray had been played in but bigger than the one in which Elliot had directed Cat on a Hot Tin Roof. It was old-fashioned and vintage and Roman loved it a lot. He parked the car and took his husband's hand, and using a key he had been given by Elliot, he opened the front door and stepped into the foyer.

"Okay, put this over your eyes," Roman instructed, procuring a piece of black cloth, and tying it over Samuel's eyes in the form of a blindfold. The then carefully guided his husband through the halls and into the largest theatre, with the largest stage and the most seats. The stage had been decorated with a mix of white, green and purple fairy lights that were bright enough to light up the space with a warm glow. There was a large black piano in the centre. In the front row of seats, the middle seat had been adorned with an arrangement of white and purple roses with green and white baby's breath as a filler, and there was a pretty white envelope in the centre of the seat cushion. Inside that envelope contained the handwritten sheet music to the song Roman had wrote for Samuel for their tenth anniversary.

Roman wrapped his arms around his husband from behind and kissed him on the back of the neck. "Okay, you can open your eyes now."
 
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Samuel blindly let Roman lead him into the building, trusting him completely, he had no reason not to and was not the least bit nervous, just excited. So, when Roman said he could he quickly removed the blind fold and opened his eyes.

"Oh... wow," Samuel breathed, not knowing what else to say. They were in a theatre, by the front row. Everything was lit in the dim light of fairy lights and around him there were gorgeous flowers. Samuel absolutely loved flowers, they were one of his favourite things ever and he knew Roman knew that. There was a piano on the stage, and from experience Samuel could figure out that meant Roman singing, he didn't know what yet but that didn't matter because he was already excited. He was also a little ready eyed just seeing the theatre. It reminded him a little of being in the movie theatre where Samuel had proposed to him, but a little more personal with all of the flowers and the lights. It was perfect.

Samuel turned around and pulled Roman in for a kiss since he couldn't really think of anything to say right away. He let his lips linger on Roman's for a while, to tell him how much he loved it without words and when he pulled away he felt like he finally could form the words to describe it, "this is amazing I love it,"

He stepped back a little to take it all in again, and that's when he noticed the envelope on the seat next to them with all the flowers. He grabbed it, looked at Roman for a moment and the carefully opened it. He pulled out some sheets of paper. It was sheet music and lyrics. Samuel couldn't read sheet music but he could read the lyrics, he didn't recognize it as anything Roman or him liked though. He looked at the paper for a moment then he finally realized, "did you... did you write this?"
 
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Samuel's reaction to what he had planned warmed Roman's heart and made him feel amazing. Roman had spent a lot of time on the preparation for this event, and Samuel's initial positive reaction to it just assured Roman that all of his hard work was going to pay off.

"Yes, I did," Roman replied with a nod of his head. He had spent months working on it whenever he could, and now, he was so excited to perform it that he felt like he was going to explode. He smiled at Samuel and gave him a kiss to the top of the head, before he climbed onto the stage and made his way over to the piano, sitting down at the bench and opening a typed copy of the sheet music.

"Keep in mind, this is the first full song I've actually written by myself," Roman said to Samuel as his husband got seated in the chair that had been adorned just for him. "And it's an awful lot harder than it looks, so I hope you like it."

Roman gave his husband one last smile, before he turned to the sheet music, cleared his throat and began to play. The opening bars of the song were slow but powerful, relatively simple yet complex in the emotion that had been packed into them. Roman then opened his mouth to sing, and when he did, his voice had a smooth and affectionate tone, with a sort of old-school vibe he had channeled from his favourite singer, Lana Del Rey.

"Look at you kids with your vintage music ... coming through satellites while cruisin ... you're part of the past, but now, you're the future ... signals crossin' can get confusing ... it's enough just to make you feel crazy, crazy, crazy ..."

The song was about how Roman had always felt with Samuel. It was about how even though they were growing older with three kids and serious careers he always felt as young and free as he had when he had been seventeen when he was with the love of his life. It was about how they could be doing the most simple of things, but it didn't matter, because they loved each other, and that was what was the most important.

"I get ready I get all dressed up ... to go nowhere in particular ... back to work or the coffee shop ... doesn't matter if I'm not enough ... for the future or the things to come ... 'cause I'm young, and in love ..."

For the final lyric of the song, Roman turned and looked up at his husband adoringly. Samuel John Colin Hemlock-Ortega. The love of his life.

"I'm young ... and in love ..."
 
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Samuel got seated and waited excitedly for Roman to start, after just glimpsing at the lyrics and seeing a sheet of music he didn't understand he had no idea what to expect but he knew already before it started that he would love it. And he was right, from the first couple of notes played on the piano to Roman starting to sing, all of it was amazing. Music was lovely, played skillfully, Roman's talent was very clear. Samuel made sure to pay extra attention to the lyrics, listen to every single word as he knew Roman had had this moment and their relationship in mind. He felt like he understood it, he at least could feel the love through Roman's words and they made him feel amazing inside, he also decided he would inquire about Roman's exact thoughts about his choices of word later because he was interested in not only his own interpretation but also Roman's intention.

By the end of the song Samuel was properly crying, not sad tears of course, he just felt so very emotional. It was a really fantastic feeling to know Roman had spent what was probably a lot time writing this song for him, just to preform it now on their anniversary. Samuel decide give a small applause, it was silly but it just felt right because this was a performance even if it was for Samuel only. After that Samuel wiped his tears, though they kept welling over, and hurried up on stage and to Roman. He wrapped Roman in a big hug, which was a little awkward since he was still sitting down but Samuel just couldn't wait to show his appreciation.

"That was the most beautiful song I've ever heard you sing," Samuel said earnestly, it didn't matter if it was Roman's first song he had written by himself, it was still amazing, as expected from Roman. He was such a creative soul, which was one out of countless things Samuel loved about him. He nuzzled his husband's hair gently, "it was perfect, you're so talented, I love you,"
 
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"I'm glad you like it, baby," Roman murmured, his voice slightly muffled due to his face being pressed against Samuel's chest. It filled his heart with warmth and happiness to know that Samuel liked the song he had written for him. Of course, he had known Samuel would like it, but still, it made him feel good to physically see the reaction it had caused.

Roman reached up and wiped the tears off Samuel's cheeks, smiling as he did so. He then stood up and gave him a sweet and passionate kiss. God, he loved this man. He couldn't even think of what his life would be like if he wasn't with Samuel.

Roman gathered all the flowers and fairy lights and put them carefully into a few plastic bags, so they could take them home because he knew Samuel would want to do something with them. He then handed the keys over to his husband and sat down in the passenger seat, because it was time for Samuel's surprise, meaning he obviously had to drive to transport them there.

"Okay, I'm ready to see what you have planned."
 
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"Okay but it's gonna take a little while, so don't get too impatient," Samuel chuckled and pressed a little kiss on Roman's cheek before starting the car. It would take a little while to get there so to prepare Samuel had made a playlist with songs that were important for them and their relationship and just songs they liked in general, ranging from Disney, to Bruno Mars to Panic! at the Disco. They chatted idly during the ride there until they finally got a little further outside town.

"Alright," Samuel said and pulled into a parking lot to a small little centre with a shop and a small pizzeria, "We're not really here yet though, we gotta walk."

Samuel opened Roman's door for him and got a duffle bag filled with stuff from the back and then took Roman's hand so they could start their small journey. Eventually, they arrived at a small little picnic spot, it wasn't too far from the road and the parking lot and all that, but far enough for it to feel a little more remote. There were some trees scattered about and the ground was covered in soft grass.

"Okay, give me a second," Since Samuel had planned his event outdoors in a public place like this h hadn't had a chance to prepare, but he didn't mind Roman watching as he got out a blanket out of the bag, "okay, sit please," they sat down and Samuel continued to set things up. He got out a disposable grill, a bag of marshmallows, some graham crackers and chocolate, as well as a two-litre bottle of coke and a bag of chips for Roman and a bag of dried mango for himself. Then finally he got the last thing out, the real gift that he had spent the most time on.

"Okay so, I thought, because we got together in your room under your galaxy ceiling we could have this moment under the real night sky, so that's why we're here" that was the reason he had had to drive out a bit from town, he could have chosen a spot in a park close to home, but he wanted a higher probability of seeing the stars, and as he looked up they were indeed there, "But my main gift is this,"

He held out the item he was holding, it was a photo book with a black cover and a purple satin bow tied around it as wrapping. On the front, it said Our relationship, and then underneath it 2017-2027, it was handwritten with gold pen. Inside the photobook, glued onto the black pages, Roman would find photos from the past ten years in chronological order. On the first couple of pages, they were just seventeen, and the pictures depicted them with their current friends, or just at Roman's place in the shape of old selfies they had taken with their phone. As the book progressed they got older, major milestones where there, the first birthdays they spent together, their first Christmas, moving out, the pets, their friends, he had even included a bittersweet selfie of them both wearing makeup while being bandaged and bruised after the car crash. There was also the wedding and after that, the pictures got a little better as it was when they had gotten their camera. All up until getting Harper and the twins just the months prior was depicted, it was quite thick, all pictures were printed out on nice photo paper, even the one from their and their friends phones and Samuel had captioned them all, sometimes with one simple sentence "You, me and Lady, August 1st 2022" and sometimes he had just written out a paragraph about the moment, what he remembered from it and how much he had loved it. The last page was already captioned with the date and the title "10th anniversary, I love you, "but the picture spot was empty, as it was the only picture he had yet to acquire.

"I hope you like it,"
 
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Roman allowed himself to be directed to a small picnic space and he smiled as his husband set up a grill and laid out the ingredients for s'mores. He had already opened his chips and was purely content with the adorable little picnic, thinking that that was Samuel's surprise and being more than fine with that.

But apparently, he had been very wrong. When Roman realised what the real gift was, his eyes widened and he looked up at Samuel, and gave him a bright smile before he turned back to the album and opened it to the first page.

He looked through the book, glancing at every image but lingering on the ones that stood out to him, like their wedding photos, or the pictures of Harper they had taken a few days after the baby had been born. He didn't have time to look at them all properly at the moment, but he could tell he was going to spend hours looking at this photo album in the future. It was such a gorgeous and thoughtful gift, and it was clear that Samuel had put a lot of thought, time and effort into it. Roman absolutely loved that.

He reached the final page and set it aside, only to lean over and pull his husband into a tight and loving hug. "I love it," he whispered. "It's absolutely amazing, Samuel, I love it and I love you. It's so thoughtful."
 
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"I'm glad you like it," Samuel smiled into the warm embrace, he was really happy Roman liked what he had made for him. He never doubted for a second that Roman would, but it meant a lot to hear it out loud, especially when it was something that was both creative and personal, then years ago Samuel wouldn't have ever even thought about making something like this, or if he did, he would have been embarrassed to show it. But that wasn't him anymore, thanks to Roman and being with him and loving him for the past ten years, he was comfortable with himself, "I think it has gotten me into scrapbooking though, I'm probably going to end up making ones for the kids first years and stuff as well, it was really fun,"

Samuel had never really had a creative outlet before, and he still wasn't the best at photography and he was sure someone could have made this little album a lot prettier than he had, but he was proud of what he had accomplished and had honestly had a lot of fun making it. And making another one without having to keep it a secret from Roman seemed a like a lot of fun. He did already sort pictures into albums, but this was nice and felt a little extra special.

He pulled back from the hug after a moment, kissed Roman quickly on the lips and got his phone up, it wasn't as good as their proper camera but it made taking selfies easier. He readjusted their position so they could take a picture, "We just need something for the last page, say cheese,"
 
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"If you're about to embark on a lifetime journey of scrapbooking, I'd like to say now, I wholeheartedly support you in his endeavour," Roman said with a smile. Not only was he glad that Samuel seemed to have found a creative outlet, but the scrapbook was truly beautiful, and Roman would love to see the lives of their children chronicled in similar albums.

Roman happily got into position for the selfie, sitting beside his husband and pressing a soft and gentle kiss to the top of his head. Once the picture was taken Roman looked at it. It was sweet, and showed their affection and intimacy as a couple. Roman loved it.

The rest of the anniversary went along flawlessly. They ate their delicious s'mores and then returned home, enjoying the night to themselves without their kids, which happened so infrequently now that Roman could hardly remember what it was like. But he couldn't complain, because his life was perfect.

And that had never felt more clear than that night, when he was falling asleep in his husband's arms, the photo album resting on the bedside table, cloaked in an aura of warmth and love. They had been together for ten long, amazing, perfect years, and Roman simply could not wait to experience more.
 
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Samuel couldn't have asked for a better anniversary. It had truly been the perfect day, from beginning to end and a couple of days later the picture they had taken was glued into the album with the rest of the pictures. And Roman's song for him was very much stuck in his head because he kept asking Roman to sing it for him.

Despite just hitting ten years nothing really changed in their day to day lives, they still had work and their kids to take care of, still had to adjust to having two little babies. It was a challenge, and Samuel could feel that he was a lot more tired than he usually was, but it wasn't much different from when Harper had been their age, things were a little more stressful since there were two of them, plus Harper to take care of, but Samuel felt like they were managing okay. He and Roman were in it together, they worked well together, they knew when the other was tired and needed a break and they knew when hey needed extra comfort at night and they knew when they needed to just relax and have fun with the kids.

That day was a day just like any other. It was afternoon, Roman had been home with Eden and Stella while Samuel had been at work and Harper at daycare. About an hour or so ago Samuel had ended work, gone to pick up Harper and arrived at home. Because Roman had been taking cares of the babies all day Samuel had decided to give him a little break and had taken over baby duty for a little and was now sitting on the floor in the living room with Eden and Stella in floor seats on a little blanket while Harper seemed to still be very energetic after daycare, running around playing with Poppy. Since it wasn't really time for dinner yet Samuel had spent some time catching up on what had happened at home that day with Roman who at taken the spot on the couch. Malfoy was sweetly snuggled up next to him.

"So did they have a nice nap? Thet both seem pretty well rested? Harper's teachers told me he got plenty of sleep, that's probably why he's got so much energy now," As Harper hurried past him Samuel playfully grabbed the little boy and hauled him up in the air, "Aaah! Got ya! I'll save you from the terrifying puppy!" Samuel laughed loudly. Stella and Harper both looked at the interaction curiously, seeming to get just as much entertainment from just looking at the excitement as anything else. Poppy happily yipped and jumped after Harper's legs and then moved on to go sniff curiously on the babies.
 
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Life returned back to normal and Roman and Samuel both settled into their regular routines. They went to work as normal and took turns taking care of the babies while the other was busy. Today, Roman had stayed home while Samuel went to work, which, usually, went by smoothly — of course, it wasn't easy to care for two infants, but it was never particularly stressful either.

Today, however, had been an exception. Eden had been particularly clingy and had screamed whenever Roman had tried to put him down, meaning he had been forced to do everything one-handed. Stella had not wanted to take her bottle but had not wanted to go down for a nap, either. Roman had put on a movie for her to watch which had thankfully settled her down a little, but she had conveniently demanded his attention whenever he tried to tend to Eden, meaning Roman was often holding both of them at the same time and was trying to divide his attention equally between two needy infants.

Eventually, they both went down for their nap, but by that point, Roman had a splitting headache and felt nauseous and stressed. He had known this was the start of a migraine but had been unable to go and sleep himself, because he needed to finish something for work, so he had taken his medication and tried to ignore the throbbing pain in his head.

Now, Samuel was home and Roman was trying to relax on the couch. His headache had subsided a little, but at every loud noise it flared up again so Roman suspected that might have been wishful thinking. At least the twins were calm now.

"Yeah, they went down a few hours ago, they were asleep for —" Roman was trying to answer his husband's question, but Samuel chose that moment to swipe Harper off his feet and lift him up into the air. The little boy shrieked in delight. The combination of that excited little scream and his husband's loud laugh suddenly made Roman feel like his brain had exploded with pain. He felt dizzy, and the nausea hit him like a truck.

Roman jumped to his feet and ran to the bathroom before collapsing in front of the toilet and throwing up the contents of his stomach. He knew he should have gone to sleep while he had the chance, but it was too late, and now, he had a fully-fledged migraine to deal with. Great.
 
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Usually, Samuel was able to tell right away when Roman was having migraine symptoms, but since he had just assumed his husband was exhausted from taking care of the twins all day it took Samuel a moment to realise what was going on when Roman ran off to the bathroom and very audibly threw up. For a moment he actually considered Roman just being sick, but he realised pretty quickly that if that had been the case Roman would have mentioned it, So it had to be a migraine and Samuel felt very bad for being so loud.

"Okay shhh, shush," Samuel said in an attempt to calm down the adorably yipping dog, he pet her head a little and she seemed to realise they weren't playing with her anymore. Samuel stood and sat Harper down on the couch and allowed poppy to jump up and sit next to him. That was good then he'd have something to do, "Harper can you please sit there quietly, come get me if something happens to the twins, okay? Thank you,"

He kissed Harper's head, out of habit but also to comfort him as he probably was very confused about what was happening. Samuel then hurried into the bathroom where he found Roman on the floor in front of the toilet, the smell of vomit very much there. Samuel turned off the lights and went to sit down next to his husband. He knew touching was a big no when he had a migraine so he wasn't going to just pull him up and haul him off to the bedroom even if that was what he would need in a moment.

"do you need help to the bedroom or should I go grab the bucket while you get there alone?" Samuel whispered, very quietly, knowing that every word would hurt him, but still needing to communicate. Samuel hated seeing Roman having his migraines, there was so little he could do to help and that was all he wanted when it came to Roman's health issues, to be able to help.
 
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"I —" Roman was abruptly cut off by another round of vomiting, which of course made the pain flare up in his head again. God, he hated having migraines. In a way, it was worse than haemophilia, because he had learned to deal with that and it didn't hurt anywhere near as much as this.

"Ugh, fuck. Yeah, can you get the bucket?" Roman asked as he pulled away. Once he was sure he was done, he slowly stood up, and made his way to the bedroom, one hand on the wall as he walked for support. When he reached their room, he collapsed down on the bed and pressed the aching side of his head into his pillow.

He could hear Samuel and the kids out in the rest of the house and immediately felt guilty. Samuel was now burdened with the responsibility of caring for three small children by himself, all the while having to keep them quiet despite them being small children. Roman knew it wasn't his guilt but he couldn't help feel bad. He just wished he could be better for his family.

"I'm sorry," he said to Samuel once he came in. His voice was quiet and he still had his eyes closed. "If one of the twins go back to sleep you can put them in here to make it easier on you."
 
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