Religion, Rage, and Work

[Diana]

Now that we've reached "I must have the last word!" point of stupidity and sarcasm, YOU CAN BOTH STOP NOW.

Ya'll need a Snickers. o___o

People wanting to give advice step to the left, People that want to argue, get out. >>

RESUME CONSTRUCTIVE TOPIC.

 

[Windsong]

Thank you, @Diana .

Guess I want to restate:

tl;dr: I'm sorry for any attitude I've given anyone on Iwaku lately. This has been gnawing at me for weeks and it's harder to control my temper about it.

 

[Falcon]

Religion: I'm not going to say anything about what happened or should or should not have been done on either part. Only that while you shouldn't have to feel like it's being shoved down your throat, it seems your grandmother has had a life charging experience and when something like that happens (of any kind) it is only natural to want to share that with those closest to you. If you look at it from her point of view (though her actions seem obnoxious at best) she probably only has your best interest at heart and wants to share something she believes to be good.
Whether you listen to her or not is entirely up to you.

My advice (if you care to read it): If it happens again try a courteous "Thank you for your love and concern." That's it. Nothing else. It acknowledges that she cares for you without extending her grounds to attempt to push further. And it should block further attempts for argument without ignoring her completely. It is extraordinarily difficult to argue with someone who has just told you thank you.​

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Corruption: I'm sorry, but I have no idea what to tell you. I suppose I'd ask if it would harm you (emotionally, mentally, morally, other) if you did nothing, and figure out what course you want to take based on that. I know that's not much help. :(

Temper: Personalty, I find it very helpful to get some fresh air in the moment. If you can, try going outside and walking around for a minute or two.
I find it helps to walk around the block and pray, but since you've said that's not your thing I'd suggest maybe trying to count your blessings, things you're grateful to have in your life, or something that makes you smile. If you can focus on the positive things for a bit it might help the minor annoyances not seen so bad.

Wishing you all the best ^^

 

[Windsong]

Thank you everybody for the wise words and fair advice. Pretty sure I've come to a conclusion on what needs to be done to keep my sanity.

For my grandmother I've tried seeing her and talking it over. It's just the same scenario that my (not directly) refuting God/Christianity is going to be my downfall in life, despite not having followed it for many years now. When I explained that we (myself, my wife, and the rest of the family) still love her dearly we feel that she puts the Bible first and it's hurting everyone. That's where the conversation ended and that's where it stands.

For work I plan on contacting the next tier of supervisor and explaining what's going on. Today when the problem worker was talking to our boss she was doing nothing but putting me down indirectly and talking about how it's a racial issue after I'd explained statistics don't really lie. Also how she explains and rationalizes her not needing to take her leadership role at all seriously and guide anyone beneath her "because it ain't get job". That's the straw that broke the camels back today. I want to pity my boss for any discipline that comes his way but when he does nothing to defend me from her ridiculous accusations I could honestly care less now.

For my temper me and my wife have picked up gardening on our apartment balcony. She wants to start get yoga again after work and I plan to join her, as well as some meditation if we find something we like.

Again, thank you all for the support and help. Feel free to add anything else anyone wishes to add.

 

[Kagayours]

I know you said you already figured out what to do about your grandmother, but here's a thought about the whole religion thing if you ever encounter a similar situation: it's possible to disagree with an ideology without attacking it.

It would be one thing if this was just about you saying that you just don't believe in God and/or don't agree with Christianity. But in that post there, you pretty much equated religion with cancer and said that it shouldn't exist. I can easily see how people would get emotional about that -- hell, I felt a bit offended when I came across that post elsewhere (the rant thread, I think?), though I held my tongue -- and when people are emotional and feel attacked, shit escalates pretty quickly.

I know the relationship between you and your grandmother is a lot more nuanced than this, but, when I first read what had happened, my first thought was "maybe she wouldn't have been so upset if you weren't bashing on religion so hard".

Food for thought, I suppose. I'm not saying you're not allowed to have an opinion, just, bear in mind that when you offend people, shit will start to fly real fast. Take Rare, for example. And this holds especially true for people's personal beliefs and values. That's probably the most sensitive topic you can touch for most people. It's possible to disagree with these things and not make people feel so hurt.

 

[Windsong]

It was a mistake to post it. And I do apologize if it did cause offense. Being mad, clouded judgement, whatever you'd like to blame it on.

My opinion stands on religion being (what I feel) as just wrong in a lot of ways. From hurting people, hating others, and hindering progress because an old book doesn't have anything on the subject because it's a modern matter. But that's faith, and many people are unshakable in it. That's for a whole other thread I'll never bother to create though.

To my grandmother even the most recent time we spoke she took my disagreement as an attack, which hurts me just because I'd never purposefully hurt her feelings while thinking clearly. Time will have to tell how things go. I've made the apologies I could and filtered what I browse, like, and share on Facebook that she could find offensive.

Also got my email out to the director of operations today. Now it's just a matter of waiting to see how it goes over the next few days.

 

[Kaddoc]

Religion, Rage and Work is hardly a healthy combination.

Then again everyone is entitled to their own opinion and if someone else does not like it then that is their problem.

I have lost count on how many online fellowships have ended when I said these simple words "That's the way I feel, deal with it."

 

[Windsong]

Another little update on the work situation for those that like to hear results: I put in a call to the fraud hotline and heard back from them twice now. They think there's plenty of evidence to handle it.

Got another call this morning from the fraud department as well saying I may have to take it to the sheriffs department because she could face criminal charges. Pretty sure that's their job to take it further once I've turned it in..

More waiting. Never did receive an email back from director of operations.

 

[Brother Gabriel]

I'll will try to help you in there

In Religion

As a born Catholic Believe in what you believe in my friend, if you think that the bible isn't true then must respect that because that's where the disconnection happens, But i think to fix this is to try to reach out from to your grandmother, try to talk to her and try to fix your shattered relationship. just talk to here

In Rage

Okay that is downright wrong, if someone is doing fraud then it's a offence to the law, you have every right to tell this to your principle.
Don't let them continue this . . . this fraud , Stand up on what is right my friend, FIGHT FOR YOU ARE RIGHT

In Temper

Try to control yourself my friend, Don't let what's happening on work bring you down, use it to fuel your drive, if you let the rage control you then the rage will be with you and the temptation is sooo strong that you'll just lash out, Be at peace with yourself my dear friend

I hope this helps you