RANT Your Brains Out #98274

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Kagayours said:
o_o" Wow, I mean, I appreciate the support, but, in regards to certain things, uhh... they kind of were right... I'm relatively at peace with it now, at least compared to when I posted that earlier comment, but, they were right.
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NO THEY WEREN'T, STAHP DIS. -muppet arms and banishes all deez lies-
 
Our hydro's gonna be shut off for approximately 12 hours on Monday while they run maintenance and install meters for each unit. We're not gonna have power - and therefore no heat - for roughly 12 hours.

This wouldn't be so bad if we weren't supposed to be hit with a fucking winter storm on Monday.

Goddess, you guys picked the worst day.
 
This is typical you.

Even as kids, you didn't have to do any of the chores. You got to sit on your ass and watch TV with your friends. And you know what I was doing, just a wild motherfucking guess? Oh very good, you got it. Working. We lived on a farm, I can tell you exactly how many animals we had. Shall I list them off? 35 rabbits. 40 chickens. 3 dogs. 9 cats. 12 degus. 1 chinchilla. 6 guinea pigs. 1 parakeet. That's 107 animals (or I suck at adding). And I did this from the age 5-14, alone. And I had to do the cooking, the cleaning on my fucking own because your ass was told you didn't have to do it.

It was my job. You were going places in life, you had a future. I had housework and hard labour to look forward to. I settled with that lot a long time ago.

You grew and so did I.

But you know what didn't grow, oh sister of mine? Your inability to clean up after yourself and do your own god damned dishes. What the fuck do I look like to you, Cinderella?!

You are telling me, after all these years, you have not learned how to clean on your own? You are 26 years old motherfucker, learn how to do this shite.
 
Why is my life so lonely and pointless? No one actually communicates with me outside of the internet......clearly something's wrong with me. None of my family reaches out to me, my coworkers don't like me, if it weren't for my dad texting me every morning I'd spend the first 9 hours of the day lonely and without really conversation. It's not healthy to spend all day in an office without a window to the outside world.

Oh and a coworker threatens to go to the boss because I got to a point where I snapped and yelled at HIM not the off shore designers when I couldn't get more than 30 seconds to try and find what the fuck they wanted me to look at.
 
Chocolate banana milk is not as good as it sounds. I seriously regret my purchase.....
 
I'm a failure as a human. When I'm old no one will care when I die. Even my own family is afraid to talk to me.....without my parents I'd probably go insane. And yet I can't make any friends.
 
My trip to visit family isn't until mid-May and I'm already having small panic attacks about it.

Terrific. -_-
 
I hate the cold! I hate the snow! I hate it all!! Why couldn't my family move to Florida to be near me? It would have been so much better. Now I have to freeze my ass off, and be miserable most of the year. :(
 
Disappointed. Disappointed. Disappointed. Disappointed. Disappointed.

At this rate, I should just expect disappointment in every aspect of my life, even the ones I should be able to control. It's better than getting my hopes up.
 
Me: There are games on the Switch that I want, but I don't have a Switch.
Me @ Me: You are an adult with money. You can solve this problem for yourself.
Me: Hmm... good point... *googles the Switch's price*

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*thinks about the cost of each game on top of the console itself*

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Originally, I was being forced to move out to make room for people to take care of my grandfather.

Grandfather dies.

Now, I am just being moved out because my of my brother in law is a lovely, compassionate person.

Fuck the lot of you.
 
Sickness, sickness, and more sickness.

Damn I can't stop getting sick and it really pisses me off. I really need to take better care of myself..
 
Stop thinking about it, Kag. This can't be good for you. You're obviously obsessed. Just let it go.


*sigh* Easier said than done...
 
I am so so so fucked. Why can't I focus for shit these days? If I can't do well enough in this class, what hope do I have for this career path? As per usual, I can't help but ruin everything for myself.
 
I've said it once before, and I'll say it again. People need to keep their kids home when they're sick! I know it's not always possible, but it's really fucking inconsiderate to let your kid infect everyone else, especially if the family doesn't have insurance. Fortunately, my kids have insurance, but I'm getting really fucking tired of dragging them to the urgency care clinic twice a month for something that could have been avoided if another person had just kept their kid home!
 
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I am disappointed with myself and ashamed. I wish I knew how to manage things better. Everything. My time, especially...
 
There is no right answer. Any attempt to find a right answer, just makes me feel worse. All I can do is make a guess and hope that I've chosen the path that will result in the least amount of pain... or at the very least, the path that won't leave me in a significantly worse state than where I started.
 
How many nights in a row now have I managed to feel decently ok up until right when I should be getting to bed, at which point I then have an emotional episode that keeps me up a while longer and then leaves me struggling not to cry myself to sleep because I feel like absolute shit? Too many...

For fucks sake, can we at least get this over with a little bit earlier in the night so that I can crawl into bed on a relatively happy note?
 
Just eight days... Just have to make it eight more days, then I'll actually start to get somewhere... Just have to take deep breaths and distract myself till then... Don't freak out. Don't make a fool of yourself like last time. You will have an appropriate outlet for all this soon. You just have to hold yourself together until then...
 
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