Rant your Brains Again!(Once More)

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Our apartment complex is under new management now and they're changing all of the policies to total BULLSHIT rules. >:[ I can only assume they're trying to run out most of the tenants. I wanted to move out and us get a house since we can afford it, but convincing the man sure is going to be a bitch. Whyyyyy does he haaave to haaaate chhhhaaaange. c____c

men are so difficult! t___t
 
Tell him there's no sex until you move. Either you break up or you move out.

I DON'T THINK YOU'LL DO IT THOUGH, YOU DAMN NYMPHO. >:(

Man, why does everything related to sound have to be imported and so fucking expensive, god. Fuck you, Chavez, make people think venezuelans are rich again.
 
*GROWLS*

I KNOW HOW TO DO MY JOB! Don't ask me if I tried this or that, don't ask if there is any other explication if your mainboard is dead ITS DEAD!! ITS NOT GOING TO MAGICALLY STAR WORKING AGAIN AND ITS MY JOB TO TRY EVERYTHING. Now stop standing there with your jaw at your knees and accept that its gone to be replaced and you'll be surfing for pron again soon enough, yes I found you collection when I was checking for viruses. Hidden folders aren't so hidden you know especially wen they're on the desktop and clearly labeled 'รุบ xxx'
 
GET THE FUCK OFF MY BACK, ALL OF YOU BASTARDS!!!!!!!!!!!!
FIRST OF ALL, YOU ASSHOLES AT WORK!!! SCHEDULE THE FUCKING BAGGERS
BETTER AND STOP BITCHING ABOUT IT!
IT'S YOUR GOD DAMNED FAULTS THAT THE BASKETS AREN'T GETTING
INSIDE, BECAUSE YOU KEEP MAKING THE BAGGERS DO ALL THE
BULLSHIT THAT THE CASHIERS WHO AREN'T WORKING
COUUUUUULD BE DOING! BUT NOOOOOOO! MAKE THE
BAGGERS DO ALL THIS BULLSHIT! SWEEP THE FLOORS!
PULL THE STORE! MOP MOP MOP!!! AND DON'T FORGET THE
FUCKING RESHOPS! FORGET ABOUT THE FUCKING LAZY-ASS CASHIERS!
LET THEM GOOF OFF WHILE YOU BITCH ABOUT BASKETS!!!! OR BETTER YET...
DO IT YOURSELVES!!!!!!!!! GO TO HEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEELLLLLLLL
LLLLLLLLLLLLLL!

GET THE FUCK OUT OF THE LINE, YOU TALKATIVE BITCH! GET OFF THE FUCKING PHONE AND PAY FOR YOUR GOD DAMNED ORDER! YOU'RE HOLDING UP THE LINE!!!!!!!!!! AND YET YOU'RE GONNA BITCH ABOUT HOW LOOOOOOOONG IT TAKES TO CHEC OUT AT THE STORE?!
FUCK YOU!

AND THE NEXT LADY?!
HOW DARE YOU TELL ME HOW TO DO MY JOB, YOU FAT BASTARD?!
WHY DON'T YOU GO WADDLE BACK TO YOUR PARENTS' BASEMENT AND FAP OFF TO YOUR GERMAN PORN?!!!
LEAVE!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
AND NEVER COME BACK!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

MOM!
LEAVE ME THE HELL ALONE!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
I ALREADY TOLD YOU ALL I WAS GOING TO COLLEGE IN JANUARY!!!!!!!!!!!!
BUT NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!
THAT'S NOT GOOD ENOUGH FOR YOU!
IT HAS TO BE ON YOUR TIME?!
FUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUU
UUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUU
CK YOU!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
I AM NOT GOING TO COLLEGE FOR YOU!
NOT FOR YOU, NOT FOR MY FAMILY!
FOR ME!
CAN YOU UNDERSTAND THAT?!
IS THAT ENOUGH FOR YOUR MINISCULE BRAIN TO PROCESS?!
NO? Fine:
GET OFF MY FUCKING BACK!
OH, I TOLD YOU TO SHUT UP?
LIES!!!!!!!
OH, AND NOW I "SLAMMED" THE DOOR IN YOUR FACE?!
YEAH, YELL IN MY FACE, GO RIIIIIIGHT AHEAD!!!!!
OH, AND NOW I'M LYING ABOUT BEING ALLERGIC TO HELIUM?!
OH, I WAS SMOKING POT?!
I NEVER KNEW!!!!!!!!!
GO BACK TO YOUR ROOM AND PASS OUT!
Oh, great, now my FUCKING HAND'S BLEEDING!!!!
OH, I'M LYING ABOUT THAT TOO?!
I CUT MYSELF?!
FUCK YOU!!!!

JUST SHUT UP AND GO TO HELLLLLLL!!!!!!!!!!

OH, BUT I FORGOT!
I'M THE FUCKING DOORMAT, AREN'T I?!
EVERYBODY EXPECTS ME TO STEP BACK AND LET PEOPLE
CRAP ALL OVER ME, DON'T THEY?!
GREEEEEEAAAAAAAAAAAT!!!!!!


DAD, GROW A PAIR!!!!! TELL THIS BITCH SOMETHING!!!!!
DIVORCE HER!!!
STOP TELLING ME ALL THIS CRAP, EVERYBODY!!!!!!
JUST SHUT UP!
SHUT UP SHUT UP SHUT UP SHUT UP SHUT UP!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
JUST LEAVE ME ALONE!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
 
Yea I feel that one all to well. I worked at a grocery store for a long time.
 
That is the one place I refuse to work. Had a friend working in one once and learned from his mistake.
 
So... I think everyone in our class is about to break..

Why is it that lately all I have to rant about is school? Should it be making me this miserable?

First of all, Monday of last week we got new dogs in from the shelter. Like I've said before, we do workups on them and such, and two people a week are assigned surgery duties. Well, I had rounds Monday afternoon, which isn't part of the surgical assignments in any way, it's merely taking care of the animals and making sure they get to go outside and get fed.

Well, I know for a fact that Art, one of the dogs, was brought in after going outside to go potty because I brought him in myself so I could take his vitals to record in his chart. After that, I fed him, gave him water, and all was good. At the same time, there were the two surgery rotation people doing their workups in the other room. When we had gotten done with rounds, we went into the classroom to do something for one of our classes. Without us knowing it, the people that had surgery rotation took Art outside to get a urine sample and FORGOT TO BRING HIM IN. My friend Ro and I had no idea until one of our classmates called us to let us know the teacher was NOT happy.

And I can understand why not. Leaving the animals outside where they have the potential of getting loose is VERY BAD. But we got to school the next morning, and the rounds crew AND the surgery rotation group were both called into the office, where they told us what happened and how pissed off they were, and after all was said and done, the surgery rotation group ADMITTED to leaving the dog out, and the rounds people (who had NOTHING TO DO WITH IT) STILL got in trouble, because we were 'supposed to check behind and make sure everyone was inside'. I'm sorry, I may be in the wrong here, but THEY did something wrong and WE get in trouble for not babysitting them?! I don't really think that is right.. I mean.. I'm already having issue with points being taken off of my grade for something that actually WAS my fault.

Should I have to fail a class because SOMEONE ELSE didn't do their job, and I wasn't there to babysit them..?

I have another one.. but it shall have to wait until later.. TIRED, YO.
 
"hey hows it going" and easy phrase to say am i right? WRONG!

even if english is my first language, what the fuck is this fucking confidenceless self esteem shattering shit of a thought that causes me to freeze up you say?

'well, i dont want to be a dickhead and spoil her night, or worse still, start some sort of confrontation with some drunk fucknugget'

yup.

thats the sole 'no nuts, guts or bravery' reason i cant talk to chicks im attracted to, and that leads to me to clam up and just look from across rooms and shit.

FUCKSHITFUCKFUCK!

it makes me rage so fucking hard when that happens, almost like when i get that fucking haklf stutter, where i know what i want to say, but my mouth wont co-operate and i end up looking like a fucking fish.

man i swear too much. and on the topic of swearing, why do i seem to be saying C**t so often, i ahte the word, i fucking loath it, and yet somehow its working its way into my everyday work jargon.
for fucks sake, just coz im a tradie doesnt mean i ahve to swear.

but back on the main rager, the never had a relationship one.

right about npow is where i start telling myself that what im going through is nothing, and that im mentally weak for thinking such a triviality is a major deal.

but i can never convince myself.

y'know what, lets do a history of my dealings with chicks in a romantic sense.


had a crush on a girl in grade 3-4, was told that she'd like me if i lost wieght and was into sport, so for a coupla hours/days i tried to change, then decided "fuck it" and switched on uinrequited mode.

grades 5-6 had crushes on 1 or 2 other girls, nothing came of it other than ridicule and manipulation.

year 7, too busy dealing with the whole "all boys schools suck" deal
year 7 part 2, redoing year seven, finding out i had ADHD and starting on the ritalin, good times, chairs thrown across the room, verbal fights with whole gangs of people in the year above me, the beggining of what i call me "knight complex"

year 8: nuttin on the romance front, but a whole lot of learing about how not to crack the shits.

year 9: MAJOR crush on a girl, gaining confidence from Rex Hunt's autobiography, I tell her that despiter having these feelings, I knew she didnt like me that way and that id rather be freinds than let things get awkward.
was rewarded with a "thats sweet" and a hug. (easiest let down ever.)

year 10: moving on, knight complex taking control (looking at the worlkd as black and white a corrupt place that must be fixed or destroyed)
still have that crush.

year 11: crush diminished by a host of other feelings, like anger at the world and the dickheads in it, a whole lotm more reflection and (in my view) self growth.

11/12 INTERIM: in the christmas hollidays, i do some work for my freinds dad, end up living away from home for work.
go to a pub, get blind trying to work up the courage to talk to this girl, finally after around 12 vodka and energy drinks and a shot of whiskey, i ask if i can by her a drink.

she says yes!
thus i bring back the drink, and stand there for a while thinking of what to say, if anything.

then i hear "fuck off" from either her or her freind
"okay" i slurr meekly, before doing just that.

year 12: crush on a girl i'd known for all 6 years, mostly she annoyed and aggrevated me, but towards the end i started to like that...(fucked i know) too gutless to tell her so nothing happened.


this year: seen so many people ive been attracted to yet said nothing out of gutlessness.


see, its not like ive had anyone try to hurt me, or had anything terrible happen in my life, so ive got fuck all to complain about, yet still i feel this black bitterness.

you could call it an emptiness of the soul if you wanted to be poetic/emo, but i prefer to think of it as just plain olf frustration.

others are usually no help either.

"you'll find someone"
"just be yourself"
"gotta get out there to find someone"

hip hip hoorah.

thank you captain obvious brigade.
usually these people have had relationships fall into their fucking lap.
some good some il, yet all have felt some sort of reciprocated attraction.

not me though.


i dont give a fuck if im the butt of peoples jokes because of the way i act when im bored, i dont give two shits about what most people think of me, im just sick of being lonely.


that said, i msut reiterate that my life has been fucking good barring the 'love' side of things.
 
I've been in college for a couple days now, almost a week....

I have three roommates....

Two of them get along with me just fine, because we've hung out enough to understand each other....

The thing is, the third hates me.

She hates how I try to be cheery to everyone.

She hates that I hug people a little too much....

She hates everything that makes me who I am....

The other roommates see what she does, and they just watch....

I've had a shoe thrown at me, and I'll be damned before I throw something back.

I'm homesick. I miss Texas. I miss my dog. I miss the way summer in TX makes you feel like you're walking in a giant swimming pool of sweat....

I'm trying my hardest to be positive.....I'm trying to deal with this bitch's awful taste in music. I've smiled through the 4-5 AM walk-ins where she FINALY comes back to the dorm room. I've even dealt with her almost bipolar attitude without a frown.

She threw a fucking shoe. So what am I supposed to do?

I've tried to ignore her. I've tried to deal. She's made friends with the other roommate, better than I have. Which supports my whole low-self esteem issue with the trouble of making friends.

I've become the cute little oddity from Texas, And-
"OH LOOK! SHE DRAWS LITTLE DOODLES! AWWWWW AIN'T THAT CUTE! We don't really like her drawings, but DAHHHHHHHHHWWWWWWWW!"

I'm upset....
 
You know, I'd kinda like to have some shitty personal trouble like "Somebody hates me I love to drink drinking is bad my life is horrible"

Instead I've got to worry that if the country continues to go this way we might just have to call ourselves New Cuba: Be Happy You're Still Alive!
 
^ thgats what im tyalking about, i know i have nothing to realy bitch about, yet i feel i msut bitch and be sad allk the same.

its fucked.
 
AHHHHHHHHHHH !
This is super secret. You can't tell anyone. No one ! Not even that secret plush toy you snuggle at night without anyone knowing and then stuff under your bed so no one knows your uber secret ! NO NOT EVEN IT ! (YES I CALLED IT AN IT SO WHAT)
....

NAO TAN TAN TAN TANNNNN

my dad just gave me my very first very own credit card.

......

AHHHHHHHHHHH

I'm really not sure why he gave to me. Or what I did to deserve it (not saying that I'm bad or anything) and I don't mind. I mean, I don't feel guilty, I actually feel appreciated and nothing bad and good, really, but I'm confused because is it like here, you're a good kid you deserve this or here, I'm expecting you to be uber responsible now because you have some real plastic for your wallet and not one of those fake credit cards that come in the mail with the VOID VOID VOID all over the back....

RAWR MOAR RAWR

So I'm just like @_@ and O_O and T_T and >_< and whole bunch of other emotions because I'm super happy but super confused because I don't suppose I can be any more responsible at this age. You know, I'm just 16. I can't just become full fledged adult, but I'm not saying I'm NOT responsible, I mean I am. If they married me off today, I could take care of a house and kids and study and everything (doing that now minus the kids and the bills XD)

But I'm just saying... What sort of responsibilites does a credit entail ? Does this mean I should spend more ? (considering I rarely buy things because I fear that daddeh's pension can't pay for everything). WHAT DOES IT MEAN WHEN YOUR DAD GIVES YOU A CREDIT CARD WHEN YOURE A SIXTEEN YEAR OLD ? O_O Seriously. If I ask my dad WHY he gave it to me, he goes "Its for you NAO thats whats IMPORTANT." BUT BUT BUT THATS NOT WHATS IMPORTANT ! -_- or he laughs if I ask him if this means something. HE LAUGHS not taking me seriously. but then why he give me a CREDIT CARD <<< thats taking me SERIOUSLY isn't ?

ROAR MOAR RAWR

I think I'm just hyper. But if you DO know something about credit cards at an early age, lemme know ! YUP YUP NOD NOD
 
My grandmother said I need to hurry up and have children before I get too old and end up having "mongoloids". o______o

Sorry grandma. x____X just though I'd be a responsible adult by making sure I have a stable relationship, home, and financial situation before even thinking about children. You know... all those things the rest of the family neglected to do. >>

mongoloids. x___x damned.
 
@Sakura: I would stick to using your credit cards for emergencies only, Unless you have a job to pay off your charges.

RAAANT!
OK, so I am about eight months into my college education. Two years and four months until graduation. But I'm still having doubts... I guess I should clarify, before enrolling into college, I was on my way to joining the United States Marine Corps. but some how my plans got derailed (I won't go into that here). Anyway, here I am almost a year later, still thinking about it. I mean what the hell?

I'm studying something that interests me. I'm quite happy. And I know that if I continue down this path I will probably enjoy a pretty comfortable life. I mean I was brought up thinking that one must constantly strive for success and to achieve it as early as possible. Yet something deep inside me longs to give up everything and join the USMC and see where that takes me. I mean there's always time once I'm done to finish school and pursue a prominent career.

However, I am currently on target to graduate right in the middle of a 50% boom in my chosen field. AND I'm not really a quitter. But I feel one should serve their country, regardless of political standings.

I'm just at a complete loss...
 
I hate rent weekend. o_____o Especially when there's no grocery money and I severely need to buy things like laundry detergent and toilet paper. We won't have extra cash until next weekend. >:[ EVERYONE NEEDS TO STOP USING THE TOILET UNTIL NEXT WEEK.
 
In response or addition to my previous rant: (This is a rave) I had one of those life affirming experiences the other day. While studying some course material I was reminded why I chose to pursue my major. I feel pretty good.
 
My housemate has just ripped my first three chapters to pieces. I had spent this month rewriting them, and now it seems that everything is wrong.

She seems to hate my heroine - the hero's love interest. Now this is a character that's been inspired by many of the female members of Iwaku as well as some of the characters depicted in our roleplays. She's young, somewhat naive, with shades of ADHD and co-dependency. She's also hugely artistic and open with her emotions, falling helplessly in love with the hero from the first chapter.

But my housemate is putting big red lines through anything that makes her seem weak or immature.

Is this some twisted kind of jealousy? (I had a relationship with my housemate btw, and she's older than me). Is she attacking my heroine because she doesn't feel they "deserve" the love of the hero (who is blatantly based on me)?

What's worse is that I've used the same housemate to create the villain of my story (a femme fatale who seduces the hero and screws him over).

So... how can I trust her edits when her own ego is represented in the story as opposed to the very heroine she's supposed to be identifying with...?

I guess this is why it's a BAD IDEA to put yourself and your friends into your novels, however much you modify them.



Why is this so fucking hard? Why is everything I put at the start of this novel wrong?

The hero's based on me, and I can't introduce the reader to him properly.

I guess it figures.

It takes years for people to like me in real life. My hero doesn't stand a chance.

Even though we're both so simple... just a guy with good intentions beaten into the ground by this fucked up world. Is that so hard to understand... so hard to identify with?

Maybe my housemate thinks I'm being mysogynistic - that I'm creating a heroine that's weak and incapable of hiding anything - a woman who keeps coming back to the hero no matter how much he abuses, neglects and sexually dominates her.

Is this what the readers will think? Will they feel my self-loathing and my contempt for the world and cast my book aside as some sickening tirade?

Do I have to become a healthy member of society before I can properly write about the maladjusted?


All the books and all the films that are churned out in this world, day after day, and this one novel is taking so long... causing so much suffering... raising so many questions. The twists and turns of 15 years condensed into printed paper that will be read in a day and forgotten.

Writers are fucking idiots.
 
Awwwww, don't be sad Asmo, I'm sure it'll work out...
 
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