Practicing Positivity

[Falcon]

What are some things you do to help yourself stay positive?

I write what I'm thankful for on post-it notes and stick them to my closet door

 

[ᴛᴏᴄᴋᴀ]

I just hug my kids. Kind of hard to stay negative after that.

 

[Greenie]

I just tell myself that things could be worse, I suppose. And then try to look at all the positive things, because when I'm down, I kind of forget they're around.

 

[Kestrel]

Accomplish goals.

 

[Kitti]

Depends on the depth of the problem. A little eh feeling? Keep busy, redouble efforts, do things that make me feel at least useful. Getting stuff done and being productive is a good feeling.

Deeper problems that make me want to lay in bed all day and feel miserable? Hot tea, cat cuddling, and one of my favorite movies usually helps.

 

[Brovo]

I just take a few minutes to stop and remember that I'm an insignificant speck of flesh, attempting to come to grips with the existence I find myself within. I am the universe, made manifest, attempting to understand itself. Part of an ever growing, fantastically complex, evolving series of social and biological mechanisms. Every material in my body was forged in the womb of a star.

Just think about that for a few minutes next time you're sad. You're literally made of the stuff of stars, and after billions of years of cosmic changes and hundreds (if not thousands) of species evolving before you, came to become you.

Whatever problem you face now doesn't seem so vast or terrifying anymore, does it?

 

[Pahn]

I try to find a silver lining in everything. Some people don't like that -- but it helps me balance the good and the bad.

Why do you think the Internet is full of cat pics and gifs? Because cats are so carefree, they don't care about anything but themselves. More than once, I have caught myself looking at cat gifs to feel better. :)

As for positivity in general - I remind myself that I am the maestro of my own symphony. The violinists might be playing off key, the tambourine might be absent that day -- but it's all up to me as to how I decide to use those situations. No one else but me decides how I'll handle my feelings, my victories and defeats. I have control over me.

 

[Greenie]

@RedWillow - I wish I could give you all the positive ratings *sends over buckets of rainbows*

 

[Pahn]

@RedWillow - I wish I could give you all the positive ratings *sends over buckets of rainbows*

Hahaha you're making me blush x3

It took me a long time to be able to view life that way, because it's so much easier to feel victimized by life, to blame "fate", than to take responsibility of yourself. But once you do that, suddenly you can turn bad things into some positive :)

 

[Sir Salty]

I'm pragmatic and logical, despite the number of mental health problems that set me back. I prefer not to look at things with negativity or positivity. I am, if I were an alignment of DnD, Neutral in all things unless it his my personal weaknesses. Imo, positivity training is simply the work of the Happiness Industry. People who strive for positivity, have been influenced in some form or another that they must always be happy and have a momentary moment of sadness or even moments of bleakness is a bad thing. I refuse. I feel it is dismissive to ignore how I feel. And because of my interpersonal personality, I seek it out to understand it. Our society tells us we have to feel happy, look at the way we use our marketing we market with happiness.

I think everyone should be allowed their bleakest moments. And I think we should acknowledge people's bleaker moments. And I think we should be more respectful of the bleak and dreary.

Just because someone is or has a feeling of dreariness doesn't mean they always are dreary.

I don't seek positivity, but I also don't seek negativity. I'm positive in positive situations. I'm negative in negative situations and I don't try to cheer myself up or don't try to say it will get better. I recognize it's a low point, allow it wash over me, and then I move on afterward.

 

[Diana]

I find one good thing about every day, and I work really hard to turn any damaging thoughts in to constructive ones. If there is something I am upset about and I can't fix it, I look for the things I CAN do something about instead of wallowing on everything that is going wrong.

 

[Pahn]

I'm pragmatic and logical, despite the number of mental health problems that set me back. I prefer not to look at things with negativity or positivity. I am, if I were an alignment of DnD, Neutral in all things unless it his my personal weaknesses. Imo, positivity training is simply the work of the Happiness Industry. People who strive for positivity, have been influenced in some form or another that they must always be happy and have a momentary moment of sadness or even moments of bleakness is a bad thing. I refuse. I feel it is dismissive to ignore how I feel. And because of my interpersonal personality, I seek it out to understand it. Our society tells us we have to feel happy, look at the way we use our marketing we market with happiness.

I think everyone should be allowed their bleakest moments. And I think we should acknowledge people's bleaker moments. And I think we should be more respectful of the bleak and dreary.

Just because someone is or has a feeling of dreariness doesn't mean they always are dreary.

I don't seek positivity, but I also don't seek negativity. I'm positive in positive situations. I'm negative in negative situations and I don't try to cheer myself up or don't try to say it will get better. I recognize it's a low point, allow it wash over me, and then I move on afterward.

I understand where you're coming from, with what you're saying, but I must disagree.

Yes it's okay to be sad. It's okay to be depressed. It's okay. You are allowed to live through your emotions fully, whether they are dark or bright.

What is not okay, is to bring everyone around you down. What is not okay, is to not thrive to get better.

You control how you feel -- why would you want to live stoically and bleakly when you can be happy? Happiness is not something you pursue, but a state where you would not want things to change, because you are content. We had a thread the other week about happiness, and I think the person who embodied happiness is @Poe Dameron and he completely nailed it.

Being positive doesn't mean lying to yourself or others about how you feel. It's about taking a different look at life, and hope that the burden on your shoulders which blind you, is lifted momentarily, to help you fight.

 

[Sir Salty]

I understand where you're coming from, with what you're saying, but I must disagree.

Yes it's okay to be sad. It's okay to be depressed. It's okay. You are allowed to live through your emotions fully, whether they are dark or bright.

What is not okay, is to bring everyone around you down. What is not okay, is to not thrive to get better.

You control how you feel -- why would you want to live stoically and bleakly when you can be happy? Happiness is not something you pursue, but a state where you would not want things to change, because you are content. We had a thread the other week about happiness, and I think the person who embodied happiness is @Poe Dameron and he completely nailed it.

Being positive doesn't mean lying to yourself or others about how you feel. It's about taking a different look at life, and hope that the burden on your shoulders which blind you, is lifted momentarily, to help you fight.

Then you get into circumstances like me, where I feel like telling someone to constantly be positive is dismissive. Is dismissive to the issues at hand. I'll sum it up with a quote

[BCOLOR=transparent]I'm as much a placeholder person as January is a placeholder month. I exist to make others seem more interesting than me as January seems to only exist to make the other months more appealing. To make the wait more exciting for something better. I make other people better, but cannot seem to better myself despite taking all the affirmative action that I have.[/BCOLOR]

[BCOLOR=transparent]I'm working on getting Social Security, it's a slow process, and they can legitimately deny you as many times as they well damn please[/BCOLOR]

[BCOLOR=transparent]I'm working on getting assistant living homing, but my IQ is not below 80 actually it's higher than the cut off point, and so I most likely don't qualify. So I'm still homeless even if I am couch surfing at people's places[/BCOLOR]

[BCOLOR=transparent]I have no family support or really friend support either, they say about the same thing "just think positively" or it will get better[/BCOLOR]

[BCOLOR=transparent]But when a situation like this has been permanent for 3 years, it's harder and harder to think positive when you have no money, no home, no food, [/BCOLOR]

[BCOLOR=transparent]I want the basic things in life. I ask for food, stable finances, and a home. I ask for clothes on my back beyond the 2 pairs I wear. [/BCOLOR]

[BCOLOR=transparent]I'm not sure what future you consider someone to look forward to when the sum of my life has been highly unlucky. [/BCOLOR]

[BCOLOR=transparent]So I take emotions as they are. When good things happen, they are good things and I am good in that moment. When bad things happen, they are bad things, and I am not happy in those moments.[/BCOLOR]

[BCOLOR=transparent]It's the best way I can cope with the circumstances. People assume that because someone is neutral or comfortable in the dreary without having to be happy or sad about it, that they aren't doing anything with their lives and I suppose I hate that assumption. I am doing what I can, but I am waiting on a uncaring, slow system. That rather have me rot faster than I can get the help I need.[/BCOLOR]

 

[Falcon]

Okay so this is not a thread about life views or how we think the healthiest way to deal with emotions is, and it's certainly not a debate about personal choices / perspectives etc.

Think of the question like this. When you personally find yourself in a place where you need to be positive or actively want to be more positive for some reason, to drag yourself out of feeling blue, dealing with negativity from an outside source, trying to change your own view, whatever the reason may be -- what does that look like?
How do you actively practice Positivity?

Is it something you take action with like the way I use post-it notes?
Is it something mental for you like the way Diana says she turns her damaging thoughts into constructive ones?
Is it something emotional like just being willing to acknowledge your feelings and why you have them?
Or is it something else?

There is no right or wrong answer here ^_^ I simply want to know how and if different people do/or do not do this ^_^

 

[Sir Salty]

^I actively am positive when situations around me are positive.

 

[The Mood is Write]

I try my best to avoid writing out my pet peeves and annoyances in public. Having a positive public appearance helps wonders, because people treat me like a positive person, so my thoughts start to go that way. If I must vent, I do it on a private platform, and even then, I try to think of how it might be due to a misunderstanding.

Second, always assume people have their own lives and aren't extras. This is hard for me sometimes, but if I remember it, then I don't get upset or depressed when they have to disappear for a while to work, to stress, to vacation time, or anything like that. It does wonders for my ability to deal with others, but it can be hard to do because I'm not naturally gifted with empathy.

I also tend to avoid stressers, too, unless I believe dealing with them will lead to a positive result. For example, yesterday I spent hours counselling two friends of mine who have a hard time talking to each other. I'm glad I did, because now they're acting like they've been friends forever.

 

[Poe Dameron]

I understand where you're coming from, with what you're saying, but I must disagree.

Yes it's okay to be sad. It's okay to be depressed. It's okay. You are allowed to live through your emotions fully, whether they are dark or bright.

What is not okay, is to bring everyone around you down. What is not okay, is to not thrive to get better.

You control how you feel -- why would you want to live stoically and bleakly when you can be happy? Happiness is not something you pursue, but a state where you would not want things to change, because you are content. We had a thread the other week about happiness, and I think the person who embodied happiness is @Poe Dameron and he completely nailed it.

Being positive doesn't mean lying to yourself or others about how you feel. It's about taking a different look at life, and hope that the burden on your shoulders which blind you, is lifted momentarily, to help you fight.

Well thanks for mentioning me! I don't know if I truly embody happiness, but I believe happiness to be a motivator, and a catalyst to greater things. Hey, it's a lot of things, even temporarily... One nice day in a week of clouds helps you laugh at the whole picture and deal with it.

I think you have a better vision on this though, hehe

 

[Archwar]

I just take a few minutes to stop and remember that I'm an insignificant speck of flesh, attempting to come to grips with the existence I find myself within. I am the universe, made manifest, attempting to understand itself. Part of an ever growing, fantastically complex, evolving series of social and biological mechanisms. Every material in my body was forged in the womb of a star.

Just think about that for a few minutes next time you're sad. You're literally made of the stuff of stars, and after billions of years of cosmic changes and hundreds (if not thousands) of species evolving before you, came to become you.

Whatever problem you face now doesn't seem so vast or terrifying anymore, does it?

And unfortunately, that star we were birthed from died.

But worry not fellow meatsacks! We humans will (hopefully) one day discover how to stop our own star from dying out! We have already made great strides in science, society, and many other advancements! Hell, today is a age of peace where war, death, and all those nasty things are on the decline. We're also the only species to want to understand where we came from and how we came to be which has driven us to walk among the stars.

We, the Human race, have made nature our bitch despite it still trying to give us a lovely spanking! :D

So next time when you're sad, sit back and think that nearly a hundred years ago, you could have been one of those poor blokes sitting in the trenches of WW I or suffering discrimination. Even if you go and argue that there's still people suffering what out, we humans, as stated before, have already made great strides and one day such suffering shall cease to exist.

Now excuse me while I go and force the U.N. to get off its lazy ass and start doing stuff.

 

[Brovo]

Now excuse me while I go and force the U.N. to get off its lazy ass and start doing stuff.

Leave it to science, inventors, and commerce to make the world of tomorrow. The UN's pretty much just a symbolic gesture of ensuring that no major world powers do anything overly fucky, but it has little in the way of real power should it ever contradict what a major government wants. It's also a really good place to figure out how the world (or at least its governments) think on various issues. Like minefields! Or human rights.

I mean, we've been doin' this whole improvement shin dig long before the UN, or prior to it, the league of nations. With or without the UN's approval, humanity will proceed forward, as it always has, into the brighter tomorrow.

 

[Archwar]

Leave it to science, inventors, and commerce to make the world of tomorrow. The UN's pretty much just a symbolic gesture of ensuring that no major world powers do anything overly fucky, but it has little in the way of real power should it ever contradict what a major government wants. It's also a really good place to figure out how the world (or at least its governments) think on various issues. Like minefields! Or human rights.

I mean, we've been doin' this whole improvement shin dig long before the UN, or prior to it, the league of nations. With or without the UN's approval, humanity will proceed forward, as it always has, into the brighter tomorrow.

I already know that. The League of Nations failed as a result of various factors not to mention its incompetence(along with Europe's own incompetence) to stop Hitler. After WW II, it dissolved and gave way to the U.N. which, while stronger, had it own set of problems namely the differences between the Communists and Democratic nations. After those differences were resolved, the U.N. did become stronger and passed the Universal Human Rights Bill as well as several others that also prohibited the use of chemical weapons and various others.

And I meant that jokingly. I know that treaties like the Geneva Convention won't stop people from finding loopholes and abusing them.

Anyways, thankfully you are correct about it being a good place for people to gather and figure out how to tackle issues and various other stuff.