Playing with Fire

The first trimester of the pregnancy wasn't exactly the most pleasant for Carina, who experienced sickness almost every single day without fail. Some days were good, and she was able to enjoy a walk through the castle gardens either by herself or with Lauren, or spend some time in the library. The worst days had her sleeping until late, attempting to sleep through the nausea that rocked her stomach as if she were on a boat rather than in bed. Certain foods became her enemy, sometimes not even the smell of them but the sight. Like eggs, or the blood leaking from a medium-cooked steak.

The doctor had warned her, during her four month check up, that she was slightly under what she ought to be by that point. The little bump that had started to grow a bit smaller than average, but yet there was nothing to be too concerned about.

Because of her lack of appetite, she had started to take vitamin tablets in order to keep her body and her baby as strong as possible, knowing she would have to get them from somewhere. Often she would take them first thing when she woke up, so they had enough time to digest before she went down for breakfast. She didn't want them wasted if they were about to come straight back up at the smallest bite of toast. But even the tablets struggled to stay down on her worst days, so it was a constant battle for Carina.

As the months continued, she also found a new strain on her nerves and her mind. So often she would wake in a cold sweat, new nightmares forming of her death. Most of the time it was Sven, but never in the same way. Sometimes she would be laying out on the bed, exhausted after bringing their baby into the world, for it to be taken away and her throat slit before she could even hear it cry for the first time. Sometimes she would be in a rocking chair in the nursery where flames would erupt and Sven would walk through them to collect their child, leaving her screaming and burning to death. Sometimes she didn't even die, but had to watch in agony as she was locked away in the dungeon with Sven holding a young child's hand, walking away from the dungeon door where she would scream out and batter the door with bloodied fists.

Other times her murderer was her child, twisted and cruel after so many years under Sven's guidance.

Carina knew she would never see her child grow past the age of two or three, and even then that was pushing it. This was already their first child after five months of marriage. She had promised him two more. She wasn't sure just how long she could draw out her promise to provide spares now the heir had been conceived. It killed her to think she may never see any of her children grow up.

She just had to have faith and hope in the plan created by herself and Lauren, whom of which had been working even more on Thorin now that the guard had been demoted and cut himself off from his former friend.

That being said, despite the less than pleasant symptoms and the dread that lurked once it was born, Carina was quietly excited for the baby. She had found many a book to read in order to prepare for arrival but also what she could do while pregnant. Which is why she enjoyed her days in the library, where she would sit with a book and read out loud to her unborn child. On a good day she would recite Eirian nursery rhymes and sing Eirian lullabies.

So now, with a new winter settled in and the usual hot temperature of the Ignis draining into something a little cooler, Carina settled for the evening in the library, sat in front of an empty fire place with a light, silk blanket resting over her crossed legs. It may have been a lot cooler than the summer Carina had experienced, but it didn't allow her to indulge in her usual love for winter. Back in Eira, she would be curled up on a love seat in front of a fire that crackled and roasted her warm. A thick fur blanket thrown over her with a glass of honeyed milk.

She sat staring into the unlit fire pit, hand gently stroking over the mini bump as she kept herself lost in her thoughts. She had just realised she had been in Ignis for a year now. Two months from now would be both the anniversary of her wedding... and the anniversary of her brother's murder.

It was hard to think that Eira had lost the war in January, quite possibly the coldest month of the year. Perhaps that's why they lost it, too confident that Ignis would struggle in the colder months and would be less likely to surge forward with their power. How foolish they had been.

Sighing softly, Carina looked down to the small bump, simply enjoying the silence. She had yet to see anything of Sven that day, and she was grateful for it, considering it was also her birthday. She hadn't revealed that piece of information to anyone, not even Lauren. She didn't want any kind of acknowledgement for it because, quite frankly, what was the point?

"I don't get any invites to the big parties," she murmured softly to the bump, smiling quietly down at it, "So why would there be one for me? Besides, I can count on three fingers who I'd want at any party for me; one of them is dead, one wouldn't be able to come, and the last one isn't even here yet." She chuckled, referring to the unborn child.

Carina then released a long breath, allowing her eyes to close as she leaned against the armrest of the love seat. After a momentary pause, she started another Eirian lullaby, finger lightly tapping against the top of the bump in rhythm to the song.
 
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In contrast to the sickness that had plagued Carina for those few months, with her predicament not exactly helped when sleep wasn't even an escape from her misfortune - the nightmares that also tormented her saw to that-, Sven had had a rather enjoyable time of things. He might have lost his best friend and only true confidant but he couldn't spend time devoted to his sadness when there was a lot to be excited about; a lot that made the young King want to entirely dedicate his time and energy into.

Why dwell on the negativity when there was so much positivity in his life he could instead choose to focus on?

As far as he was concerned, he was going to become a father in just several more months; a short time before he was able to fulfil a desire he had held for a few years now. That alone was enough of a reason for him to expel the negativity from his life - however difficult it was to see Thorin at work with the other guards and not being able to approach him to laugh over a joke, the King managed to ignore the bitterness and remain focused entirely on the future ahead of him. A future where he would be a father and able to build a better life for his children than the one he had been given. At the very least, he was determined to give them a childhood; not experience the horrid excuse of parenting he had to endure from his own parents. He had basically raised himself and he couldn't pinpoint one moment in his youth that wasn't ruined by his father's slovenliness or his mother's cutting cruelty.

His children would never have to worry about their father in that way. He wouldn't embarrass them nor dismiss them, but raise them with love and understanding, however uncharacteristic such a mindset might appear to be on the surface for someone who prided themselves on ruthlessly punishing those that didn't agree with his decisions. But he wasn't going to be that way towards his own children, regardless of the doubt he knew Carina was filled with regarding it.

Thus, as she struggled with the nausea and the nightmares, Sven devoted much of his time towards planning for the oncoming arrivals.Now the news was out and the kingdom aware of the heir Carina was carrying (and the illegitimate child they believed Natalia had fallen pregnant with), there was a celebratory air that seemed to dominate much of those months, helped along by an often uncharacteristically cheery Sven. Several parties commenced in that time, the King now able to celebrate with dozens of aristocrats and allies in the grand setting of the main hall rather than some intimate, secret gathering; he could boast and shout from the rooftops about his children now it was safe to do so and reap the plethora of compliments and congratulations from eager well-wishers.

He wasn't as debauched as his father had been, that man needed no reason to throw a party that would often descend into uncontrolled chaos, but he did like a celebration or two if there was a reason for it - and becoming a father in a few short months was a perfectly good reason to gather his circle of allies around him and drink, laugh and feast until the early hours. Besides, he wasn't planning on enjoying lively parties so frequently when his children did arrive so making the most of it now before the parental responsibilities and the maturity that it demanded of him kicked in seemed fair.

That evening, however, no such party was kicking off in the hall; in fact, no party was proceeding anywhere within the castle. On an evening where Sven could be relaxing in his room, recuperating after a week of almost constant work and celebration, he had opted instead to seek out Carina. This early in the evening, with the Ignisian winter settling in, there was only one place in the castle she could possibly be. He knew where she liked to spend her time and, surprisingly kindly, he tried not to enter those spaces too often. He knew the importance of his wife's comfort, to avoid unnecessary stress on their baby, so his arrival in the spaces she felt comfortable in wouldn't go down too well. That night was different, though. That night, he decided that he would make an entrance into the library in order to bring her a cup of tea (an act that had become typical for him) and a little supper, balancing the silver tray on one hand as the other pushed open the heavy doors to the castle's library.

The sight of Carina settled beside the fire, a hand resting on her stomach, did make him smile despite the hatred he held for her. It was impossible to observe the scene and not allow a proud smile to pass on his lips, much of that happiness deriving from the bump that had started to form - it just made everything seem that little bit more real.

"...I thought you might be a little peckish. There's some traditional Ignisian bread and a few different types of meat - cooked well-done with no redness to it. I thought it might be best to avoid you growing queasy given your aversion to how meat ought to be cooked; best to cook it through than leave even a tinge of pink. So... try and eat up, you need the strength," he murmured smoothly as he set the tray down carefully, his hands then resting in his pockets to avoid his arms hanging awkwardly at his sides. He took in a quiet breath, that, along with the crackling of the fire, being the only noise in the silent library - though there was only so much of the silence he could take.

"I suppose I ought to say happy birthday. I don't remotely care about it, but I feel obligated to offer a word about it, if only to remind you of how old you are getting-- I did my research on you before we attacked Eira, Carina. I don't forget details often," he hummed as he hesitated slightly before taking a seat besides the fire, a chair or two away from his wife to avoid the scene appearing too domestic and peaceful for his liking. "I haven't told anyone, I don't think you're deserving of the attention, but nonetheless: happy birthday. Enjoy your supper; that's the only gift you'll be receiving from me."
 
The lullaby abruptly cut off at the sound of Sven's voice and Carina opened her eyes, startling slightly to see him so close already. Her hand raised to her chest to press just over her heart, which was beating faster than normal. "By the-- you scared me." She muttered, moving so her legs were no longer crossed. Instead she sat normally, with her legs crossed at the ankles but the blanket still resting over her legs.

Her eyes then wandered over the tray as she recounted his words in her head, blinking a few times and not bothering to hide her surprise at his consideration. Carina knew it was all for the sake of the child, he had made that clear enough each time he produced a random act of kindness. However, that didn't mean she would ever get used to it. Carina imagined he would get bored of it eventually, that the random check-ins and the spontaneous cups of tea would slowly fade away and become more sporadic until they stopped entirely. Yet there they were, four months in, almost halfway through the pregnancy, and he was still appearing.

"Thank you." She answered quietly, shifting forward to pick up the tray and bring it onto the love seat beside her. It would be easier to reach the food that way; she wasn't too eager to keep leaning forward both for the sake of applying pressure on the baby but also on her bladder.

As she began to tentatively pick at the food, starting with the bread (which had secretly become one of Carina's cravings, mostly the crunchy crusts with butter), he surprised her once more. However before she could ask how he knew, he had explained himself. Of course he would. If there was one thing she had come to learn about Sven, was that he enjoyed bragging, about anything. So explaining how he knew about her birthday would undoubtedly be told.

"It's the only gift I've received all day," she answered after poking out the soft innards of the bread so the crust remained. She gently dabbed it in the little pot of butter that it came with before taking a bite, "I hadn't told anyone it was my birthday, either, Sven. No need to act like you're damaging my heart and soul by keeping my birthday a secret."

She chewed in silence for a moment before taking a sip of the tea, humming in pleasure at it being her favourite and holding it close to her chest.

"It's funny... isn't it? How we both despise each other yet know so much about the other. For example... I know you like your coffee first thing in the morning, even before you have anything to eat. You always pick the chocolate out of your pastries in the morning. You smoke when something is really troubling you. You prefer white wine to red. You like having things planned: everything has to have a reason or a way of benefiting you. You're scared of moths-- I've seen the way you react when one gets too close. And... your sketchbook... you love art, whether you yourself are any good at it I'll never know."

During her musing, Carina had slipped back into the comfort of sitting cross legged, finding the position more agreeable to the small ache she had in her lower back. She lowered the tea cup to pop some cooked meats onto a slice of bread to eat, slowly chewing to make sure her nausea was staying away. As she worked her way through the makeshift open sandwich, she gently pushed the tray toward the other end of the love seat and gestured for him to take some should he want it.

"I also know when your birthday is, Sven. August 14th. You're not the only one who does their research."
 
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It had never left Sven's mind how he had once uttered a 'please' to Carina; a show of manners he hadn't been intending on displaying to her but had slipped from his lips before he had a chance to realise what the hell he was saying. It was a brief moment, a mere second in length, but it had stuck with him because it had been so uncharacteristic for him to offer anyone the most basic of niceties, especially someone he despised as much as Carina.

Now, he found himself offering the words of kindness on an almost semi-regular basis. There weren't borne from a desire to be kind to her. Rather they had just become part of his lexicon around her - when he brought her food or a cup of tea, he would ask that she eat or drink as much as she could nicely, with 'please' thrown in there now and then. She responded with gratitude; the 'thank you' from her would have astounded him months ago but now he accepted the appreciation with a faint nod in recognition. He didn't pay it too much attention and call her out on it, to tease or taunt her, because he was responsible for displaying the same manners towards her. It shouldn't have been as big of a deal as it was when it was basic decency, but this was Sven, a man who cared for nobody but himself and treated others with appalling disregard.

Him being polite without some malicious ulterior motive behind it was big news.

He settled quietly and sighed in contentment once plucking a slice of dry meat from the tray with a faint 'thank you' of his own, sitting back into the chair with a faint smile at how cosy the space was. He wasn't about to make it a space he frequented often when it was clear to him that this was somewhere Carina felt comfortable, but he did regret not making the most of the library before she had taken to visiting it. It was spacious and perhaps even a little foreboding in its grandness, but the little spot besides the fireplace was cosy and warm; a perfect place to settle with a book or with his sketchbook.

The reference of that and his art did cause him to snap his gaze towards her in confusion, her rattling-off of all his likes and dislikes causing a brow to raise in genuine surprise. He had studied Carina and knew what she did and didn't like -hence the inclusion of the crusty bread and well-cooked meat- but it was naive to believe that she hadn't done the same in response - a fact her accurate speech proved.

"...You can shut the fuck up about moths by the way; I defy you to find someone who loves the things. They're abhorrent little creatures. It's not embarrassing for me to admit I dislike them greatly," he grunted under his breath as he rested his arms along the armchair, his fingers tapping against the wood at the end. He wanted to defend his talent and admit how much his art meant to him; that it had started as a result of him needing to escape his life for a little while and invest himself in a hobby that distracted himself from it all. But he didn't want to give her that ammunition to taunt him with - she could easily laugh at the open admissions and twist a knife in him the moment he showed a little vulnerability.

His silence was unsubtle, however, the fact he was so distracted by the mention of his art clearly indicating how important it was to him and not something he could dismiss easily.

"I enjoy art," he chose to reply, shrugging to himself as he absently eyed the empty space above the fireplace where a portrait of his parents had hung; a portrait he had no hesitation in burning to ash the day after their murders. "It helped me get through some things in my childhood. Whenever my father hit me or my mother called me useless, I would run to my room and sketch or paint-- though I assume you'll use that admission against me, call me a coward or laugh at how pathetic you find it to be."
 
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Carina found herself huffing with soft laughter at his response regarding moths, a small smile on her lips before she caught herself and quickly shook it off. However it was too late, the damage had been done. She had really just laughed and smiled at something he had said. Would wonders ever fucking cease? Undoubtedly he would make some sort of comment about that later, if not now. Or perhaps he would squirrel it away; it wasn't a big enough laugh to mock her with, but they both would know it was a laugh nonetheless.

Clearing her throat, she averted her gaze from him. Her hand lowered the food she was eating onto the plate, nausea rising again so she settled it with a sip of tea.

Although she almost choked on it at his next confession. There was a gentle clatter of china as she replaced the cup back on the saucer, lowering it until it rested lightly over her bump.

What an interesting turn of events. How had they come to this moment of openness and honesty? It truly was a marvel to her on just how much had changed, even the littlest of things. His manners had improved and, with them, so had hers. There was the odd please and thank you now at breakfast or on other occasions such as the one in the library that evening. Also, while a lot of it was undoubtedly for the baby, he had been kinder in his own, odd way. The tray of food and tea was a testament to that.

Carina struggled for a moment, trying to figure out what to do in that situation. She knew what he would expect her to do; he had said so out loud. Yet such honesty was unexpected. Not to mention, it was secretly heartbreaking to hear how his childhood had been. She was aware that even this could be a lie, spoken in order to manipulate her later on. Yet she found herself inclined to believe him. How could she not, after witnessing his parents' behaviour herself in her first handful of months in Ignis? Of course there was that added factor that he would never tell her something he knew she would twist or laugh at. But she knew, at least to a certain degree, just how bad his parents were.

"I... play the piano." Her lips started moving of their own accord, allowing her own confession to slip out before she could really come to grips to what she was saying. She had then caught herself, pausing as she debated pushing on with that revelation. For a moment, she bit at the inside of her cheek before raising her cup to her lips again to take a sip.

"I learned from a young age, the piano I mean. Started when I was maybe... five? I also like... vinyls. Started collecting them when I was ten. While my parents were never as horrendous toward me as yours were to you, they-- they argued a lot. I would either play the piano or the vinyl of choice loud-- and I mean loud. Just to block out their yelling... There. Now-- now we're even."
 
The laughter caught him off guard just as much as it had done Carina, the King's brow arching a little as he struggled to find a way to respond to that. Should he just ignore it and carry the surprisingly easy conversation on? More characteristically, he contemplated drawing more attention to the laughter and using the moment of genuineness to ridicule her, but that contemplation lasted all of a second, Sven instead deciding to abandon that thought the moment it appeared. Rather than any of that, he offered a grin in response - not a smug smirk or a ridiculing smile, but a genuine grin.

It was... weird to talk to Carina like this; to engage in a open, honest discussion without there being any ulterior motives to it. Without there being the undercurrent of bitterness. Without waiting for her to say something he could use against her to tear her down and break her emotionally - even if he had tried not to do that when she was pregnant, he also hadn't been very subtle in glaring in disgust at her or quipping some insult now and then. Now, however, there was no interest in doing so. For whatever reason, the openness of their conversation and the vulnerability on show was... good; it felt good to talk to her like this, to let some weight off his shoulders and lower the guard he held around himself, if only a little.

He was well aware that his talent in manipulation probably meant that she could doubt everything he said and the casual way he now held himself but he couldn't focus on that. He knew that he was being genuine and revealing to her things he had never spoken about with anyone (besides Thorin) and while it confused him, he couldn't deny how relieving it was to not constantly be at the other's throat.

He wasn't going to start gushing that he had her all wrong and that they could be friends, that was just ridiculous, but he could at least admit (if only to himself) that there were parts of Carina that weren't... entirely unlikable.

"You played the piano?" He murmured in response, the similarity between them not lost on him. Both of them had thrown themselves into something to escape their lives for a little, to block out the difficulties in their childhood. He had chosen his art; she had gravitated to her music. The realisation that they had that in common did make him sit back against the chair and stare over to the fire, trying his best not to let himself get caught up in the emotions of it. His parents' behaviour towards him had been there for Carina to see, it wasn't at all subtle, but he had never opened up about how it had been for him as a child; how he had been pretty much alone and, until he met Thorin, had only his art to escape to. Having Carina admit that she had to find something to escape to too was a similarity that was unfortunate to have in common (it was sad they had their childhoods affected in such a way) but it was an admission that made him look over to her without judgement or disgust. Rather, there was sympathy in his smile - an understanding.

"...I suppose we're even now, yeah. Saying that, I... suppose I'd like to hear you play the piano. If anything, it might be good for the baby; I read that it helps relax them. In return, I might... I wouldn't be against showing you a piece or two from my sketchbook. Maybe. Depends if I'm in the right mood or not. We both know how temperamental I am," he snorted, resting his head back against the chair and letting his eyes close, the silence in the library no longer deafening but enjoyable, the crackle of the fire and the warmth radiating from it making him smile. "...This is fucking weird, Carina; I don't think I can get used to talking to you like this, it's weird, isn't it? I don't feel like ripping your throat out which really is new to me."
 
"I played the piano." Carina repeated softly, finally averting her gaze from him. Her eyes settled on the tea cup, finger tapping against the side as she considered how much more she should divulge to him. They were both even now; he had told her why he escaped to his art and she had confessed that her music had drowned out her parents arguments. Yet she found herself considering if she ought to tell him more. But that 'more' involved Emmett, and even a year on the memories were still painful. She didn't want to dwell on that too much and potentially ruin the first civil conversation they've both ever had. Her emotions had become more sensitive as the pregnancy progressed, and she didn't wish to end up sobbing over her brother in front of Sven. While they may be playing nice now, there was still tomorrow.

Fidgeting in her seat, the tea was back on the tray and she had ripped another bread crust from the white innards to dip into the butter. It was slightly uncomfortable, having him being pleasant to her and actually to her, not the baby. It did, admittedly, set her on edge, as though she expected him to return to his cruel words and snide comments at any moment.

However as the conversation progressed, and no such insults arrived, Carina sneaked a glance in his direction. Her eyebrows had knitted together and she chewed gently on the inside of her cheek again in thought as the buttered crust of bread remained waiting to be eaten.

Eventually she looked away and focused on her food, remaining silent as she considered his offer.

"If I knew there was a piano in this gods-forsaken castle somewhere I would have sought it out long again," she admitted between bites, fingers rubbing together to brush the crumbs off, "talking and singing is good for them too. I-- I've already been doing both of those things." She didn't dare explain what exactly she had been singing to their unborn child. He didn't pass any comment when he arrived at the library while she was singing away, so she wondered if he knew exactly what song it was.

Carina then raised an eyebrow herself, head tilting in his direction, "Perhaps you must catch me in a good mood too, in order to hear my piano playing. I may have acted like the obedient little wife on the day of the executions, Sven, but I think we both know I'm far from that." A small smirk pulled at her lips, nothing malicious or taunting behind it but simply as what his grin had been - genuine and actually teasing.

"I keep expecting you to do just that. It's equally as odd for me as it is for you... I don't feel exhausted while talking to you for a change. It's... oddly refreshing." She didn't dare say nice, or allow him to know it was enjoyable. Not when that too could be used against her at a later stage, "It's tiresome enough dealing with this little creature inside me, let alone putting up with your complaints too."
 
The continuation of the playful air was... still weird. It was enjoyable and he couldn't deny the fact that he was surprisingly comfortable sitting with Carina, engaging in it, but the entirety of their past sort of indicated that they shouldn't have ever been able to be in a scenario like this - sitting comfortably in front of a roaring fire, teasing each other without malicious intent. It felt natural and appealed to a part of Sven that he didn't even know had existed, but that didn't mean it wasn't weird, if only because of how unbelievable it was.

If he went out and told Natalia that he had enjoyed a conversation with Carina, she wouldn't have believed him and assumed that he had lost his mind or, conversely, had manipulated his wife into opening up to him in order to expose her vulnerabilities and use them against her. That would be incredibly cruel but he was clearly not against doing that when his past was fraught with such instances of him manipulating people and using their confessions against them. He could do that now with Carina if he really desired it, make note of her admissions and twist the knife in later down the line like he had often done with Emmett's murder, but he didn't have that instinctive urge to hurt her.

A part of him wanted to believe that it was entirely because she was pregnant and that urge to want to see her broken and defeated would return once she had given birth but another part of him knew that that might not happen; that something had changed in his opinion of her. He scoffed to himself at that, refusing to believe it, but there was no denying the fact that he was enjoying her company - and treating her nicely irrespective of the baby she was carrying.

The mention of it did bring it to the forefront of his attention, his eyes drifting quickly to the slight bump her hand was rested lovingly on. He had fought against growing emotional so to feel that stirring up again made him inwardly groan - though a father-to-be growing emotional regarding his child was at least a reasonable excuse to get a little choked up.

"It won't be a little creature for long, you know. Before you know it, you'll be longing for the days where they were just this little bump, Carina; make the most of it now," he smirked drily as he plucked another slice of dry meat from the plate, resting a leg casually across the other once settled back in his chair. It hadn't been lost on him that he had referred to the child as theirs, rather than possessively claiming it as his and his alone, but he chose not to draw attention to it and continued on as calmly as he could. "...I should get going, I imagine you'll want to get on with singing to the baby - for what it's worth, I'd like you to maybe learn an Ignisian lullaby or two? The Eirian songs are... I can accept them, but only if you balance it out and sing something Ignisian too. I don't think it's an unfair request."
 
The faint grin that was on her face flickered and faded until it no longer existed, his words driving the words out of her lungs. You'll be longing for the days they were just this little bump... make the most of it. Had it not been for that comment, Carina may have been tempted to actually continue this actually rather pleasant conversation they were having. However, it only served to remind her of... what? Really it reminded her of many things.

Such as how once the bump was gone, he would be free to torment and belittle her, and cruelly taunt her emotionally, psychologically and even physical as freely as he had done before they had started trying for a child. Or that she ought to make the most of her time with the bump because her child would be ripped away from her the moment it was possible.

Carina was quick to lower her head, directing her gaze onto the bump, of which both her hands now came to rest on. One on the top, and the other gently rubbing the side. Then she realised how bad of an idea that was, as her sudden onslaught of emotion rapidly manifested tears which brimmed in her eyes. She turned her head to the side, looking away from him until she could get a hold of herself. While they may have had a moment of peace with each other, she knew better than to expect this sort of behaviour to continue. He may have the knowledge of her music playing, but she too now had knowledge of his art. Should he try to hold her music over her, she would throw his secret art back in his face. That at least could be controlled, but the tears, the pain she carried about potentially not being in her baby's life? Now that he could not know - at least not the full extent.

"If that would keep you happy and allow me to continue-- continue with the Eirian lullabies.... just-- just pick out a handful. Have them brought to my room by-- by Lauren or whoever. It'll-- It'll give me something to do." She answered, swallowing around the lump in her throat as she kept her face turned away.

Her one hand moved to prop her chin up, head directed toward the window. At least the Ignisian landscape looked better in the dark. Carina sniffed once, cursing herself for even that, and continued to rub at the bump.

"Thank you-- again, for the... ah... the tea and food. I'll... I'll attempt to make it to breakfast in the morning, so long as I can get a decent sleep tonight. Although I can't-- I can't promise that I will be there, this sickness is... well it's incorrigible."
 
Having been enjoying the conversation and the general atmosphere, one of contentment rather than bitterness, the sudden alteration in her emotional state did confuse him. He had been under the impression that they were both just glad to have one rare moment of peace between them; an uncharacteristic ceasefire from the usual resentment that would often swell between them. They weren't at one another's throats, somehow managing to share the same space without anger bubbling up or disgust poisoning their words.

To go from that to witnessing her smile disappear from her face and replaced with a tearful frown didn't just confuse Sven; it bewildered him, that perplexity written across his expression as he struggled to feel anything else for a solid few minutes, his mind working overtime in an attempt to pinpoint what he might have said or did to sour the mood. It was obvious to him that he was to blame for it, that an insult must have slipped from his mouth without him intending it to - and then he realised what he had uttered.

...you'll be longing for the days where they were just this little bump, Carina; make the most of it...

It hadn't been said to be cruel nor murmured to hurt and taunt her about the threat he had constantly made about removing her from her baby's life when it was eventually born. It was a threat he had made countless times and with such seriousness that he had no doubt she believed it to be entirely true - but his words now weren't a callback to that threat. Surprisingly enough, he had been attempting to make a joke; to tease her about how small the baby currently was and how she would long for it to be that small again when the months progressed and the physical toll of it growing bigger would make itself known on her body. It was said in jest though evidently the words had room to be misinterpreted - as Carina's emotional, tearful state proved.

He wanted to promise her that he hadn't been trying to upset her. That it was a meaningless joke made in good faith, to encourage the newfound peace between them - but he didn't do that. He assumed that she would simply accuse him of lying, of deliberately taking advantage of the good mood between the two of them to cruelly twist the knife and hit her where it hurt the most. It wasn't out of character for him to do such a thing; of manipulating someone so they felt comfortable before offering some cruel words when they least expected it. Just because that hadn't been true now didn't mean Carina would believe it - his past spoke for itself and attempting to convince her otherwise was a waste of his time and energy.

"...I'll send Lauren to you later on with a few songs then. There's at least two of them that I'd like you to try and learn, if you can. That would be appreciated," he spoke swiftly as he stood from the chair and reached for the tray. His demeanour wasn't cruel or spiteful, but there was a coldness there that hadn't existed minutes prior: it was the only way he could keep himself together and apologise for his remark. He was almost disgusted with himself for even considering an apology, his eyes rolling to himself in disbelief. He might not have meant to upset her but to feel bad about doing so was the wake-up call he needed to realise he was getting in too deep than he liked. Being nice to her and finding moments of peace and openness wasn't a bad idea, but to start to feel bad for her? That was out of the question.

"If you don't make it to breakfast, tea will be sent up to you. Don't feel obligated to come down, it really isn't a big deal in my eyes. Just... do what you want, Carina; I'm not arguing with you about it."
 
"Yes-- yes of course. Just make sure it's obvious that I know which two you're adamant about and I'll-- I'll make the effort to... I'll make the effort to learn them." Carina's own body language had changed, now partially turned away from him, she had pulled the blanket back completely over her legs and had even secured one of the throw pillows to hold close. She couldn't even tell, in that moment, if he had been playing her all that time. Even still, she was no better at figuring out if he was stringing her along like he had a year ago when they first met. She was used to his sneering and cruelty, and it had been such a long while since he had been anything else but that to her.

Everything seemed so sincere in the firelight, which is what confused her even more. It bewildered her to think that perhaps they were even having a moment where they just... forgot. They weren't enemies, they weren't the last of their line attempting to better the other. They were... just two adults, reminiscing over the two things that helped them get through parts of their childhood.

Carina hadn't actually felt tired during their conversation that evening, not like how she usually did when she was attempting to keep up with the verbal sparring. She felt engaged, and even more befuddling, curious to know more about what made Sven tick. And not in a way that could be used against him. Their talk of art, music and the baby felt normal and she had... liked it. Not that she would ever dare admit that to anyone, especially not Sven. Especially not now.

The past four months, she had been able to forget that she potentially wouldn't be around to watch her child grow up. Too excited despite the extreme symptoms she had been experiencing, Carina had thrown herself into the pregnancy and into impending motherhood without ever considering she wouldn't be around long enough to put into action some of the things she had learned. However that comment, even if it had been made in jest (not that Carina would ever be able to believe that it was considering past experiences), had landed her right back on earth. She knew there was still the plan with Lauren, but as the months went on, the closer Carina got to seeing her first child taken away from her. Sven had spoken about it with such seriousness, and while she knew he had agreed to allow her to live... how could she believe that? She didn't believe anything else he had to say.

"I wasn't trying to start an argument about it," she murmured, having had pulled away as he approached to pick up the tray. She cleared her throat and wiped quickly at her nose, keeping her gaze averted, "I suppose it makes sense you wouldn't argue about it now anyway, not with Natalia providing you company at the breakfast table now. I'm glad your child hasn't put her off her food."

After a small pause, Carina abruptly stood and gathered the blanket in her arms, "Don't I-- You... stay, if you like. I'm... uhm... I'm tired anyway. You were enjoying the fire so-- so stay. I think I'll turn in early for the night. Goodnight."

With barely a glance in his direction, the young queen hurried her way over to the library door to close it quietly behind her once she had left.
 
It would be at least an hour before Lauren made her appearance into the Queen's bedroom, having spent much of that time in Sven's main office helping him find the music sheets for the two Ignisian lullabies he wanted Carina to learn. The castle had once had a piano (it ended up irreparably destroyed during one of his parents' parties and never replaced) so he knew that she would be able to understand the melodies from the piano sheets - though he spent the remainder of the time painstakingly writing out the lyrics in ink beneath the notes.

He was unsettled by how disappointed he had felt when she made her abrupt exit from the library, perhaps more disappointed by how he seemed to have upset her beforehand, but he wasn't going to admit that and seek her forgiveness for whatever he had done or said to upset her so much. He was willing to share a moment of vulnerability with her, allowing them to bond over it a little, but he wasn't going to suddenly admit aloud that he found some qualities in her that he enjoyed. He had to remain aware of the fact that Carina rightly despised him and one shared moment of understanding wasn't going to resolve all the issues they held for one another - she hated him and he had to return that favour no matter how much he found himself enjoying her company.

It had been one solitary moment he was determined not to repeat. He would be polite and he would offer moments of kindness in bringing her tea and snacks, but expressing his vulnerabilities? Getting emotional as he opened up about his childhood? That couldn't continue.

Lauren hadn't been made aware of the moment the two had shared in the library, though she wasn't naive; she knew something had to have happened because Sven had been unnaturally quiet and so caught up with his inner emotions that he had barely paid her any attention. As thankful as she was for that, it alerted her to the fact that something was going on with him - and if he wasn't going to tell her, she hoped Carina would.

"Sven asked me to hand these along to you; it's some lullabies or something. Is he getting you to sing them to the baby? I've heard Ignisian music, it's so dramatic and intense - I imagine even their lullabies are," she laughed as she set the sheets of paper down on the side, settling into her favourite armchair with a faint sigh in relief at having the weight lifted from her feet. Being a maid wasn't the easiest job in the world and she wanted to escape it the moment she could. Until then, she had to act the part and get involved with every duty expected of her, however drained it made her.

Though it wasn't exhausting enough to dissuade her from acting on the plans she had going on, namely the interactions with Thorin that had finally taken on the romantic aspect she had needed them to. There had to be a bond there, a loyalty, and romance was a sure-fire way of achieving that. Sven's disloyalty to his friend had sent Thorin into her arms finally and she had spent weeks nurturing it; allowing it to deepen from just sex to something more. At least, on Thorin's part - he was just a pawn in the game for her.

"...Are you okay? You're awfully quiet - there's a lot to be happy about, you know. Thorin's as loyal to me as ever and, from his pathetic behaviour in the office, Sven's upset which is always something to take delight in, hm? Did you upset him? Oh, you did, didn't you? Do tell all, I need a good laugh."
 
Carina barely heard a word that Lauren said when she first walked in, staring into the mirror to watch her brush comb through the ends of her hair, but too unfocused to actually see it. Her thoughts were undoubtedly occupied, full of confusion and extremely unsettled by the moment she had just shared with Sven. For a split second, she found herself considering that perhaps he was human after all. The past few months had proved he at least cared somewhat for other people considering his actions and words regarding their unborn child. Yet the shared moment of vulnerability had been something else. There were no hateful words or spiteful taunts spat at each other. Instead they seemed to find some common ground.

However she couldn't let herself believe that this would be the beginning of a new Sven; a child could do a lot of things, but it was too much to think it would melt his cruel heart. The comment that triggered her clearly evidence of how he would be incapable of change.

It was now too hard to not think that their conversation in the library could have been simply a manipulative guise put on by him to lull her into a false sense of comfort. Why else would he ever reveal such an emotional, intimate detail about his life to her? Definitely not to bond in preparation for their child arriving. He had made it clear time and time again what he intended to do with her once the child had arrived. It only made her grateful that she had bitten her tongue regarding the further stories of her piano playing that involved Emmett, and even more relieved that she hadn't mentioned the death of her mother. If he were to use those against her in the future... it would have been too much. Of course his precious research would have told him that her mother passed when she was eleven, but it would never reveal anything other than that.

She could afford to get caught up in another moment like that one this evening, he had manipulated her twice now and she couldn't allow it to keep happening. No, from now on, she would be civil with his acts of kindness but otherwise ignore and avoid him. She had been made to look a fool too many times.

Lauren's final few questions finally broke through to the young queen, who blinked and turned her head to look at the maid. "...Sorry... I was... what were you saying?" She inquired, setting down the hairbrush and reaching out for her hand cream. She applied a small amount, working it into her skin as her mind caught up with what had been said.

"No... I... I didn't actually do anything. He...uh... he came into the library with some food and tea, stayed for a bit afterwards. We just... we just talked, like normal people. No-- no bickering or taunting or threats. Just... we talked about art and--and music. But then he... said something about making the most of the pregnancy or something like that and I..." Her eyes began to water again and she looked away sharply, not wanting to shed any tears over what was said if she could help it. Instead she moved on hastily, reaching out for the music sheets and spreading them out on the vanity table.

"So-- so these are the two he wants me to learn? Well it... it shouldn't be too hard, seems like a simple enough rhythm. Learn the rhythm first and then the words. At least I know more Eirian lullabies so these won't be heard as often by the baby."
 
What Lauren had been expecting from the other wasn't exactly what she received.

She had been hoping to hear, in detail, what the other might have said or done to upset Sven as much as she had - he might not have said anything much to her during their hour in the office but his quiet demeanour was more than enough evidence to suggest that he was upset about something. Previously, she and Carina would adore breaking Sven down like that and laugh at whatever misfortune had fallen upon him. In a place like Ignis, a place neither of them wanted to be in, finding amusement where they could was important, especially if it involved Sven.

What she received wasn't quite the amusing anecdote she anticipated. Her eyebrows knitted together at the sight of her friend growing emotional instead, stumbling and stammering over her words as though she had great difficulty in recalling what had happened - which only made Lauren think that it was Sven that had been the one doing the upsetting.

Though that in itself begged more questions than it answered. Some cruel remark regarding the baby was bound to upset Carina, especially in her more sensitive state, but why on earth would her upset sadden him? Why was he sulking about in his office, coughing every now and then as if to remove some lump in his throat. That didn't make sense - but what was clear was that her friend was in a bad place and needed support.

"Hey, don't cry - he's a dickhead, isn't he? Whatever he's said to you, however cruel, just know that we're closer than ever in achieving our goals, Carina. Whatever he says we'll just have to deal with now, but we'll have the last laugh," she smiled comfortingly as she headed across to retrieve the brush from the Queen's hand, taking over the duty of brushing her hair with ease. Not only was she eager to help the other out whenever she could but she though the gesture would help relax her, meeting her eyes through the mirror with another smile.

"Come on, don't let that fool upset you. If it said something about the pregnancy then he's even more of an arsehole than even I thought was possible - but it should be motivation for us. Any cruel remark should fuel is, make us more confident to tear that bastard down eventually. Just... don't let him get to you, Carina. As difficult as it is, don't let him see you emotional; he'll pounce on it and use it against you, we both know this by now."
 
"It was... 'you'll be longing for them to be this little bump... make the most of it' or-- or something like that. And all I could think about was... how much of eye-opener that was. I couldn't help but just... it made me realise... it took away some of the warmth and happiness I had for this bump. I-- now all I can think about is what it'll be like when they aren't this bump. Is he-- will they take it off me straight away? Will I even be allowed to see them or-- or will it be back to being a brood mare--"

Carina choked on a sob, head falling into her hands despite Lauren's best intentions to keep her spirits up. When those sort of thoughts, as painful and dark as them, get into one's head, it's difficult to get back out of it. She supposed she had been lucky to last this long, without a brutal, verbal slap across the face like this one to make her remember just what kind of situation she was in.

It made her feel even more idiotic. She had truly been enjoying the conversation with Sven; they had, for once, found some common ground and she had actually laughed at something he had said. A genuine, amused laugh. Just as miraculous, he had grinned, with no ounce of malice behind it. She had, for once, felt comfortable sitting with him and had actually found him to not be as unbearable as she first imagined. Not that she would ever speak these words out loud, definitely not to Sven and certainly not to Lauren - she didn't want the maid to think she was growing soft.

"I wouldn't even be getting like this if it wasn't for this baby." She finally controlled herself, reigning in her emotions with a strong grip. Carina sat back up, releasing a long and deep breath. Her eyes were closed as she took a few extra seconds, eventually meeting Lauren's gaze through the mirror.

Hesitating, she reached a hand up to rest over Lauren's, stopping her from combing her hair, "Will you... can you spend the night here again tonight? I would rather not be alone, tonight." She smiled quietly, "You can tell me about your progress with Thorin, I know you probably have some things to report back on."
 
Lauren's lips pulled into a thin line as the other elaborated on what had gotten her so upset - and from what the maid heard, she had every reason to feel that way. The words, without context of the enjoyable atmosphere and shared laughter, sounded ominous and threatening; a cruel reminder that Carina would give birth and be of no use to Sven.

Even if Lauren had been present during their interaction, Sven's behaviour wasn't something she would trust. As genuine as it had been, he had a past that would mar and stain his behaviour in the present. His kindness was to be met with suspicion; his smiles deemed false, hiding the cruelty and evilness that remained beneath it. In her eyes, Sven would never change and any kindness he was showing Carina was either purely for the baby, or a manipulation technique - using her current sensitivities to build rapport with her, only to then use it against her later on.

At least, that's what Lauren would believe. She couldn't fathom the idea that Sven shard anything genuine to the other, and if she heard that Carina had done the same, opened up and actually enjoyed the other's company for the first time ever then she would have easily chastised her for it; sternly reminded her of the man Sven was and not to allow herself to get swayed by the little act he put on.

"...Just because your hormones are all over the place doesn't mean he wasn't a bastard to you, Carina; don't let him off. He was cruel, not that that's surprising, and you should be angry about it - but not tonight. You need to rest. Of course I'll stay here with you, if you'd like me to do that. I quite enjoy it, actually. Like a sleepover, hm?" She laughed as she returned to carefully combing through the other's hair for her, more than happy to drop the anger and disgust surrounding Sven. She wanted to rant about it and let out her bitterness but now wasn't the time. Carina had gone through enough and needed to get some sleep without all the residual anger and upset running through her head.

"Thorin? Oh, it's really nothing. We kissed, spoke about our hatred of Sven and how it'd be so great to take him down a few pegs. He's interested in doing so; I've worked on that angel quite a lot. Sven's too big for his boots and giving him a taste of his own medicine should humble him. Thorin's eager to help me with that so you could say it's all going according to plan. As detestable as he is, he's a superb addition to the team - we might be using him but he's useful, isn't he? Best thing that ever happened to us is Sven metaphorically stabbing him in the back."
 
"And no one would object if they were to find out. I can simply weave a tale that I'm keeping you close in case something were to happen with the baby. Not that anyone has found out and asked so far. But-- still, that's the excuse I have prepared, so it's best if you know so we have our stories straight should someone pry." Carina smiled quietly to her through the mirror, attempting to move past the emotions of the day.

It was one thing that Carina hated about the pregnancy, apart from the sickness that is, was how intense her emotions had now become. She knew with pregnancy came sensitivity, but she never expected it to be on this sort of scale.

"I haven't... had a sleepover before." Carina finally confessed, biting the inside of her cheek lightly as she thought about it. She couldn't remember a time when someone had stayed the night that she considered a friend, much less shared a room or a bed with her. Of course she had had a lover or two but she could hardly call them sleepovers when they were quick to leave in order to avoid detection. And the war hadn't exactly made things easy, especially with her father's temper and smoking problem manifesting into something even worse than how it was after her mother passed.

It was easier to not have someone sleepover rather than have to explain or apologise to someone should something go wrong.

Her head then nodded to what was being said about Thorin, finally getting a grip on herself with a few additional sniffs. Her hands rested on the table before her, a finger tapping methodically in thought. "Good, good. Better he thinks you want to take him down a few pegs than knowing the full story should he have a change of heart. Not that Sven would, and I believe that is what would bring Thorin back to his side; if Sven admitted his mistake and apologised." She snorted softly, reaching for the handkerchief down her sleeve to gently dab her eyes free of any stray tears.

Once Lauren was done with her hair, Carina stood to change into her nightgown, still thinking over the plan so she wouldn't think back to the evening in the library.

"As we agreed, nothing can happen while I'm still pregnant. It will need to be a handful of months after, so I've also recovered my strength. You may have Thorin on your side now but I'm not about to let you both do the hard work." She said as she climbed into the bed, patting the free side to have Lauren join her.

"Perhaps now, with Thorin's influence, there may even be a few other guards that feel the same way. It may be good to find that out; see which have been stung by our King, humiliated, shunned... whatever might help turn them against him enough to agree he needs to be... taken down a few pegs. The more force we have, the better. It'll mean chinks in the armour that he will also have around himself. Then we still need to find out a way to get this bracelet off my wrist. I'm useless to all of this if I cannot use my powers."
 
This was hardly a proper sleepover like the ones Lauren had had countless times in her youth with friends back on Harenae, but she wasn't about to rattle on about her experiences when it was clear that Carina wasn't able to relate to it. The idea that this could be her first sleepover did make Lauren pause; it was slight and brief but it was a pause nonetheless, sympathy creeping in in response.

It would be easy to believe that just because Carina had grown up a Princess in some castle, she had had no problems. Hell, Lauren had held that belief for years - that the hierarchies in other kingdoms had perfect lives of privilege and therefore couldn't possibly have anything to complain about. It was true that they had a much easier time of things than the ordinary civilian, though acknowledging that privilege didn't mean they couldn't acknowledge any emotional hardships that came their way too.

Perhaps it was inconsequential in the grand scheme of things - not having ever had a sleepover was hardly a big deal, but the reasons behind that inexperience were obviously far more traumatic to Carina than she let on. Lauren could recognise that in the slight hesitation in her words and the bite at her inner cheek. She wasn't going to prod the other into opening up about it when it was clear she had gone through enough emotional ups-and-downs that night, but she was going to emphasise the sleepover element; reiterate the fact that she might have missed out in her youth, but she know had a friend she could trust and enjoy a sleepover with.

"I'd much rather spend the night here with you, talking and gossiping before settling down to sleep, than with Thorin. I find his company difficult to handle - he's easy on the eye and he does come out with little jokes that I admit are funny, but he's an utterly detestable person - he only turned his back on Sven after his demotion; not after the countless atrocities he committed. But he's useful in our plans so I suppose I'll have to keep him around - it won't be hard, poor thing's rather interested in me."

With a smile, Lauren carefully set her slippers aside and slipped into the large bed with a sigh in contentment, her aching muscles at least allowed a chance to rest in some luxury bedding.

"Natalia would probably know a way to remove it without Sven's assistance but-- well, any hope we had of turning her against him is all but over now she's pregnant; I can't imagine she'd ever turn her back on him now."
 
"You'll have to teach me some of your seduction tricks, once this is all over. I'm far too young to be a widow by the time all this may be over. Perhaps some of my people went underground, if we should succeed, perhaps there may be a Lord or two among them that I could start afresh with. But I would need your help, I'm a terrible flirt." Carina smiled, watching Lauren from where she laid on her left side.

She hummed softly, allowing her thoughts to consider the guard, "Yes, it's a shame about him. I do wonder what he would have been like if it weren't for the Ignisi family influence. But I suppose then he may have been one of the villagers rocking that carriage." She mused, fidgeting with her pillow for a moment before stilling.

Carina watched her friend relax into the bed, feeling slightly guilty at the relief that spread across her features. She realised she knew hardly anything of the work that Lauren did around the castle apart from tending to her, working in the kitchens and the unfortunate chore of answering Sven's evening call. She wished she could do more for her friend, such as convince Sven to upgrade Lauren to solely waiting on her. But she knew that would be too suspicious, and could potentially ruin everything they had been working so hard on for months.

"To be honest, I never believed we had any chance in turning Natalia against Sven," she sighed softly, hand rubbing gently against the bump, "Even before this pregnancy she was loyal to him. I think the best chance we would have with Natalia is encouraging jealousy and envy. If it seemed like Sven was spending more time with me than her, it could begin to irritate her. Sven wouldn't get rid of her, not with her carrying his child now, but it would certainly annoy him to have her annoying him. But nevertheless, we will figure out a way to get this bracelet from my wrist. I could... continue working on building up trust. But there's no excuse to use my powers."

Exhaling gently, Carina allowed herself to close her eyes, nestling down into the bed. "And do not worry about breakfast in the morning, I won't be going... Sven said something about sending up a cup of tea but... we shall see."
 
Even if they weren't led to believe Natalia was pregnant, the idea of her ever abandoning Sven was so slim that Lauren had failed to consider it a genuine option available to them. It was no secret to anyone with knowledge on the King's inner circle that Natalia had always been in love with him. Even when they first met back as young teenagers (Natalia's father being a Lord gave her that access to the Ignisi royal family), she had always found Sven interesting. As they grew closer and she was trusted enough to understand the facade he placed on to fool those around him and get to know (somewhat) who he was beneath it, the love for him only deepened.

Expecting her to abandon those years of love and friendship, to plan not just his downfall but his death, wasn't ever going to be a viable option. It was all the more impossible now they thought she was pregnant, hence why Lauren simply scoffed at the idea of recruiting Natalia.

Besides, the woman wasn't someone she wanted to spend time with trying to persuade anyway. Thorin was a comprehensible human being who knew Sven the best and encouraged his awful behaviour until it directly affected him but at least he had always been able to critique Sven too; he praised him far too often but he also called him out, if only in private. Natalia, meanwhile, would support Sven blindly, praising him constantly as though he was flawless. Convincing her that Sven had a single fault would be like trying to squeeze blood from a stone.

"Please don't let him bring you your tea; I'll do that, Carina. I don't want him taking advantage of your sensitive state to hurt or upset you - which he will if he's given the chance to. It's inevitable that you have to spend time with him, but at least cut it out when it's unnecessary - and him bringing you cups of tea and acting like the doting father-to-be is sickening, really. It's manipulative and false and I'd rather you not have to be around his bullshit if I can help," she muttered sharply, her anger solely directed at Sven as she rolled her eyes in the dim light of the room - to her, his actions were as clear as day, and none of them were genuine.

She was, incredibly, incorrect in that assertion - but it wasn't wrong of her to assume that he was being manipulative when he had a track record of displaying that sort of behaviour.

"Come on, you need to sleep; you look tired. The little one's not doing you any favours with this nausea, are they?" She chuckled under her breath, adjusting the blankets over them helpfully before settling comfortably on her side. "...I'll bring you your tea, you won't need to worry about him doing so. So let's get some sleep, Carina; hopefully tomorrow will be a better day."
 
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