Atropa Malfoy stood on the balcony connected to the bedroom. The air was cold and filled with moisture, and she could see the dew drops on the grass below. It was still very early, much too early for her to be awake, but as usual, she couldn't sleep. She often found herself restless lately, tossing and turning all night, eventually giving up when daylight began to show through the curtains. Draco had to work, as did she, but she could deal without sleeping. He couldn't, so she would get out of bed and let him rest without her disturbing him. Wrapping her arms around herself, Atropa shivered in the cold air. She could get sick, standing out in the cold like this- wearing nothing but her white lace nightgown, barefoot, no cover on her arms. Even so, she didn't feel like going back inside yet. It had been nearly a year since she'd lost the baby, but even now she felt guilty. No one could have known it would happen, of course, but somehow she felt it was her fault. She'd been scared to have children, unsure of whether or not she could be a good mother, seeing as her own was so terrible. Maybe her negative thoughts had somehow made her miscarry. She could never know for sure. Sighing, Atropa turned and went back into the bedroom, shutting the window doors softly. Draco was still asleep, and she suddenly had the urge to hold him. Atropa got back into bed gently and snuggled up against his back, putting an arm over his side, just laying with him, breathing him in. He was so different now than he'd been in school, and she always felt like the luckiest woman when she was with him. As of late, she'd begun to suspect that he'd found another woman's arms to lay with, probably at work. But she hadn't confronted him yet. How could she deny him a small pleasure, when she herself could barely look at him? She'd been the one to put distance between them, and though she wanted to close the distance, she wasn't sure how. All she knew was that she loved him.