Omnibus Academy

[Kagayours]

Oh sorry, I didn't know there were Freaer characters in the RP. The only Freaer character I saw listed on the first page was in the graveyard.

Nova is an active Freaer character. o3o

But yeah, if an ambassador leaves and there are no active characters of their race, then we just move the whole race to the graveyard. o_o The only reason that we keep a race active at all after their ambassador leaves is if a currently-active player still has a character for that race. That's why we can't just re-write the lore.

 

[Luma]

@gamer5 sorry for the insanely long wait. Sorta long post to make up for it.

Next post I'll probably have "Sol's Army" start busting into other scenes and causing a ruckus, but I'll wait for Naia, since she'd be able to influence them beforehand.

 

[Kagayours]

When the 4 had finished dawning the equipment, they looked like a ready team of Sun Warriors, with the body suits displaying a giant emblem of a golden sun on their chests.

I'm so glad Gwazi's not here.

 

[Eru]

Literally all I picture:

 

[Kagayours]

Literally all I picture:

Quiet, Gwazi.

 

[Kagayours]

@Shinku⭐Kun

To quote the RP's rules:

Please try to include, in every post, SOMETHING that other characters can react to. This means that you CANNOT:

• Make a post that only passively restates what your character just saw, without adding any new dialogue or actions in response.
• Make a post about your character doing something that doesn't affect any other characters at all (ie: them doing something alone in their room, or any other isolated location).

Your intro post for Lucifer doesn't allow for interaction with any of the other characters in the RP. And unlike most posts I encounter that have this issue, there's at least the expectation that the character is on their way to interact with someone -- but this introduction doesn't even have that. It just seems to imply that we can expect a bunch more posts of solo-writing. :/ It looks like this Leona character might become relevant, but, given that Leona is just an NPC who is controlled by you... yeah, this won't fly. >.>

Unless you're planning for another player character to interact with Lucifer sometime soon, this just won't work.

Edit: There's also the concern that I was expecting you to use Lucifer to help get IceQueen back into the RP. I was told that was the plan. What is she supposed to do in the meantime?

 

[Stray Shinku]

Edit: There's also the concern that I was expecting you to use Lucifer to help get IceQueen back into the RP. I was told that was the plan. What is she supposed to do in the meantime?

I'm about to post the rest of that long post now. I put that "To Be Continue" because I suddenly had to go while working on it (sorry for the confusion. Next time, I simply don't post anything). And about Icey's character, she told me that she was waiting for me to post something so she can up with something.

 

[Kagayours]

I'm about to post the rest of that long post now. I put that "To Be Continue" because I suddenly had to go while working on it (sorry for the confusion. Next time, I simply don't post anything).

Ah! Ok, yeah, sorry. Yeah, it might make more sense to just save the half-written post somewhere until you're finished. The "to be continued" implied that you were done with your post for the time being. o3o

And about Icey's character, she told me that she was waiting for me to post something so she can up with something.

Well yes, and I was cool with that, when I assumed that your intro post for Lucifer would end with him actually being in the academy so that Nova could interact with him. Leaving him off in the desert kind of threw a wrench in that. XD Although I now see that's not the case.

 

[IceQueen]

I shall most likely not be responding most of the weekend except maybe an hour in the evening.

 

[Kagayours]

I shall most likely not be responding most of the weekend except maybe an hour in the evening.

That's fine -- there's no rush.

 

[Stray Shinku]

I soft deleted my post. I'll complete it later because I'm tired as hell right now. Once I finish it, I guess I make a new post or undelete the post.

 

[Takashi]

@Sail are you still alive? ._.

 

[Sail]

@Takashi Yes, I am still alive. My internet went out for a few days without warning, but now I am back

 

[Kagayours]

Oh wait! @Shinku⭐Kun You might as well leave the Azrael part of your post up and then copy/paste the unfinished Lucifer post into a Word document or something. The Azrael post was perfectly functional, and leaving it down until the Lucifer post is finished kind of feels like it breaks the "don't hold off posting for one character just to post for both at the same time" rule.

 

[Kagayours]

Aaaaand the flood continues! ^^

 

[Stray Shinku]

Oh wait! @Shinku⭐Kun You might as well leave the Azrael part of your post up and then copy/paste the unfinished Lucifer post into a Word document or something. The Azrael post was perfectly functional, and leaving it down until the Lucifer post is finished kind of feels like it breaks the "don't hold off posting for one character just to post for both at the same time" rule.

Done. Sorry about that. I'm working on Lucifer's post right now. it's going to be a long one...

 

[Kagayours]

Done. Sorry about that. I'm working on Lucifer's post right now. it's going to be a long one...

That's fine. Take your time with Lucifer's post -- there's really no rush to get that one up. XD I just didn't want your post for Azrael to be down that entire time.

 

[Mook-LandStrider]

Viska

[BCOLOR=transparent]Name singular: Viska[/BCOLOR]
[BCOLOR=transparent]Name plural: Vände[/BCOLOR]
[BCOLOR=transparent]Powers/Abilities:[/BCOLOR]
[BCOLOR=transparent]Abyssal Entitity control is infact seperate from Demonic entities. They are more akin to void dwelling entities without a coporeal form. Think more wraith type than anything else. They are beings of energy without a true form. Yet, through the Viska they are able to give them a physical form.[/BCOLOR]
[BCOLOR=transparent]Chaotic Energy drawn directly from the deity that they worship known as Ira, Queen of the Abysmal Cliff[/BCOLOR]
[BCOLOR=transparent]Construct Magic: Natural magical affinity before their fall of the race from grace. Now corrupted it takes the form of temporal warping and the calling of material from their own plane to fuel whatever it is they are trying to make. It is not instant and takes concentration and patience. While able to create structures this race is also capable of building entities moulded like Golems out of matter. Corrupted by the very essence of the Queen they serve their creations are distrustful, chaotic and all around otherworldly in social run ins with any other race but the Vände. Often the smaller entities will dance around and cause mischief... some may call them annoying and they may very well be. But, they serve a purpose and as such are tolerated by their masters. [/BCOLOR]

[BCOLOR=transparent]Auditory Transfer: Coming from a plane that while beautiful remains in a low light hue throughout their 'year'. Due to this the race has evolved an affinity for hearing compared to sight.Voice to Voice as well as singing is a way of often transmitting information even through inscription and distance. This being the case many an advance design or knowledge is put into song or bound to an object through magical incantation to allow their descendents to access this vault of knowledge. [/BCOLOR]

[BCOLOR=transparent]Abyssal Voice: Despite their dark nature the Vände are as close to Angelic singers as one may be able to find. Using their voices they are able to channel their own abilities and magics in unison with the others. Led in prayer or guidance in construction by a high priestess the convent is able to raise massive buildings or means of war in days rather than years.[/BCOLOR]

[BCOLOR=transparent]Lifespan: Immortal but can die from mortal wounds. They can exist indefinitely if not killed through normal means. [/BCOLOR]

[BCOLOR=transparent]Physical description: Sleek and almost elven like in appearance, their bodies are far more akin to a high temperature or a colder temperature dependent on where on their plane they dwell. This can be found in the changing of their skins pitch from a darker shade of olive in higher temperatures to a shade of ethereal blue if the temperature drops below freezing point. Due to this they have an affinity for natural elemental resistance. Fire only seems to make them annoyed and freezing cold only offers a difficulty of movement. [/BCOLOR]

[BCOLOR=transparent]Cultural description: Built on a matriarch society these individuals form circles around their religious matriarchs. Born into their caste system the very strongest of the priestesses are Demi-Gods of their own right. Born to their queen and deity they are given the surname Ira in reverence to their position.[/BCOLOR]

[BCOLOR=transparent]Those born without the ability of sight are held in the highest regard and hold the strongest connection to their mother. While men can be born into the higher castes sightless they are often forced into warrior roles. Focusing their energies towards defense of their culture rather than building and maintaining of the culture. These two separate roles for those born without sight are much akin to how their society acts. The males often take up a warrior role while the women take up a spiritual and cultural role. Despite these keen separations they still can intertwine and support one another if need be. [/BCOLOR]

[BCOLOR=transparent]A Typical life revolves around reverence to their all mother, taking part in prayer or in simple day to day society. Although they are a highly religious society they have manifested vast ends of technology due to their connection to the Occult and abyssal forces of their plane. The devices they use are of otherworld design and simply exist through the will of Ira. Capable of dimensional travel and invasion their often peaceful society can be mustered for an invasion at the will of the priestesses who communicate with their god. While more artistic than combatant, their sheer ability to construct materials and infuse them with their planes chaotic entities makes them off putting to those creatures that know of their existence. As such, since their fall they have only been invaded on two occasions. The cultures that had tried to assimilate them had been in turn devoured by the entities that call their plane home. To walk among the Maw is to enter the very mouth of Insanity and Chaos.[/BCOLOR]

[BCOLOR=transparent]Realm: 88th Circle Of the Abyss (Maw of Ira)[/BCOLOR]
[BCOLOR=transparent]Other:[/BCOLOR]
[BCOLOR=transparent]History Suggests they are a Fallen Elven Culture who fell with their goddess into the Circles of the Abyss. Despite this they have been flourishing and appear to be returning to a more neutral standpoint rather than their once chaotic evil standpoint.[/BCOLOR]

[BCOLOR=transparent]Despite being an Abyssal plane the many areas of this existence are covered in wilderness and are often far more beautiful than one may even imagine. But, despite this temperate zone the cultural capitals stand in contrast with one another yet live in harmony. On the two polar sides of the plane are the Arctic Zone and the Immensely volcanic zone. Both of which hold the capital of the North and South of their society and the intermingling of these two peoples grants the race it's elemental resistance. [/BCOLOR]

[BCOLOR=transparent]There are three priestesses with the title Ira but only one Sightless Matriarch.[/BCOLOR]

[BCOLOR=transparent]

[/BCOLOR]

[BCOLOR=transparent]

[/BCOLOR]
[BCOLOR=transparent](Victoria's Own Voice)[/BCOLOR]

[BCOLOR=transparent]

[/BCOLOR]

[BCOLOR=transparent]Short description: Dark in culture but angelic in voice these creatures of the Abyss are able to raise structures through voice and bring material from their plane of existence into other realms through incantation. They are builders and destroyers, but above all they are a race returning from the darkness of damnation. [/BCOLOR]

 

[Kagayours]

@Angelic Fusion

Abyssal Entitity control is infact seperate from Demonic entities. They are more akin to void dwelling entities without a coporeal form. Think more wraith type than anything else. They are beings of energy without a true form. Yet, through the Viska they are able to give them a physical form.

I still don't understand what this power actually... is. Are you saying that they summon the "abyssal entities"? Create them?

Also, even mentioning "demonic" entities is kind of out-of-place and confusing at this point now that you've changed the name.

Chaotic Energy drawn directly from the deity that they worship known as Ira, Queen of the Abysmal Cliff

But what does that energy do? Does it just make them stronger? Do they get special powers from it?

Realm: 88th Circle Of the Abyss (Maw of Ira)

I'm going to need a description of the realm.



Anyway, I'm still tired enough right now that I don't have a ton of faith in my reading comprehension, so, I might have missed some things that I should've pointed out, or I might've just completely not processed certain bits at all. I'm going to have to take another look at this later. But, for now, these are the things that will probably need to be changed.

It's also fine for you to not post it inside a spoiler, by the way. In fact, posting it in a spoiler means that I can't highlight-and-quote specific bits, meaning that I instead have to highlight, copy, paste, and then manually put quote tags on it, and then tag you since you won't get an alert about being quoted... Just a minor little thing that's been annoying me about a lot of the race sheets and character sheets submitted thus far.

 

[Kagayours]

@Angelic Fusion Ah, sorry! I almost forgot about this! Giving the race sheet a more thorough look now...

they have manifested vast ends of technology due to their connection to the Occult and abyssal forces of their plane.

What "abyssal forces"? Are those the same as the "abyssal entity" and "abyssal voice" you mentioned earlier, or something else?

The devices they use are of otherworld design and simply exist through the will of Ira.

You mentioned Ira a lot... can you elaborate on Ira's relationship with these people? Obviously she's the deity that they worship, but is she, like... unquestionably present in their everyday life? If these "devices" that they use are simply created through her will then that must mean that she's very involved in the everyday affairs of the Vande, at least.

their sheer ability to construct materials and infuse them with their planes chaotic entities makes them off putting to those creatures that know of their existence.

What is a "chaotic entity"?

Under powers/abilities, you mentioned "abyssal entities" and "chaotic energy", but not "chaotic entities".

Despite being an Abyssal plane the many areas of this existence are covered in wilderness and are often far more beautiful than one may even imagine. But, despite this temperate zone the cultural capitals stand in contrast with one another yet live in harmony. On the two polar sides of the plane are the Arctic Zone and the Immensely volcanic zone. Both of which hold the capital of the North and South of their society and the intermingling of these two peoples grants the race it's elemental resistance.

Is this supposed to be your description of the realm? If so, I'm still going to need more of a description of what your realm is in terms of a... cosmic sense, for lack of a better term?

This description would be adequate for any non-earth realm, but all these references to "the abyss" and "planes of existence" give me the feeling that the Maw of Ira is supposed to be a bit more than just another world. The fact that you described it as the "88th circle" of the Abyss just adds to this feeling.

In fact, what is "The Abyss"? I feel like I need to first know that before I can wrap my head around the nature of its 88th circle.

Also, what are the videos supposed to connect to? Standing on their own, I'm really not sure what I'm supposed to get out of them. Maybe it would make more sense to include the videos if you gave each one a brief introduction, such as, "this is an example of [X]" -- or, even better, you could weave the videos into the meat of your race sheet by creating links out of relevant bits of text. Does that make sense?


All of my comments in my previous post still stand.