MR RUBBER DUCKY CHAN

[Ai]

Somewhere in a land not too far from here in a world (That definitely exists but in this context it's probably going to go over your heads. Can you figure it out? *Jazz hands*) Mr Rubby Ducky Chan grimaced at the wood on his desk, stroking his rubbery army cap with great intent as he stared at the wood.

Watching it.

Studying his reflections.

He was definitely blonde.

A figurehead for his fellow rubber duckians, Mr Rubber Ducky Chan swished his short blonde hair at a camera and spoke "My fellow nation of baboons, we must keep the lemurs at bay. For they will all stare at us with their eyes! We must not loose this staring contest! Too many of us have suffered from eye strain," he began.

"They are building weapons of mass combustion. So we will build a great wall and this wall wills separate us from the mountain goats!"

Profuse yelling ensued along with cheering and more booing. Then it stopped.

"Sir Rubber, the tunnels to send the mountain goats to Asia are ready. Old Mac Donald has released them from his farm," said a man with a generally mundane description that is too long for the purpose of this roleplay.

"Very good Jimmy, does he have beef?"
"Has he got beef sir?"
"Yes that is what I said."
"Well, no sir. He did not confirm whether or not he had beef."
"Poppycock."

The nondescript gentleman called jim blinked "You're very Northern Hemisphere today sir."

"When was I southern?" Rubber ducky returned with a stern expression, twitching his moustache.

"When you went down with your wi-" Jim tried.

"Enough, don't remind me of the woes of home, there are more important matters at hand. The plunger is running against me for dictatorship. " Ducky grouched and sat back in his chair of supreme evil duckiness "...the goats must go to asia."

 

[Kazama]

With fanfare and flair, Mr. Ducky's doors opened. And in strode His Chrominess, Duke Robobobotbo. With exactly eight servants riding his coattails, his herald hopped out to announce his presence.

"All rise for His Curliness, Duke Robobobotbo."

His Clickiness, the Duke Robobobotbo, nodded, "Tell them they are not the only ones who find it imperative that mountain goats remain close and without a wall in front of them."
"His Shininess says you are not the only ones who find it imperative that mountain goats remain close and without walls in front of them."
"And tell them that my coffers are as tall as my house."
"His Roundness says, his coffers are as big as his house."
"And that a I propose a we match their wall, by building a wall around their wall."
"His Crustiness says, he proposes that we match their wall by building a wall around their wall."
"They cannot build a wall if they cannot reach it!"
"His... Ssshhh... errr... Sssssh-Shticky...ness... says that they canno-"
"STOP!!"

Duke Robobobotbo threw up both arms, "What was that just now?"
"Err, Your... Shtickyness... fair Duke. I um... ran out of ideas. I wanted to use Shingliest, but we used that one at breakfast, m'lord."
"One more slip up like and I'll have your head, you hear?"
"Of course Your Hardiness, shan't happen again."
"Now. As I was saying..."
"His Joltiness proudly states, they cannot build a wall if they cannot reach it!"
"With my vast amount of yellow toffee and your influence, together we'll topple this threat to our goat vicinity."
"His Goppiness declares that with his vast amount of yellow toffee and your influence, together you'll topple this threat to our goat vicinity."
"What say you, Mr. Ducky?"
"His Mun... err... Mun..."
"THAT'S IT, OFF WITH HIS HEAD!"
"No wait, please!"

The herald tackled, tied, and hauled away; quickly replaced by another. He stood up straight while the other was hushed with a smother.

"His Yamminess asks, what say you, Mr. Ducky?"