Fujimoto Hinata is an old woman, but she runs a very successful cafe. The theme? Macho Men! If you're a guy that doesn't mind being ogled by cafe guests, come on in and work for Fujimotosama!
So much has been happening at the cafe lately, that all the employees of Macho Cafe really deserve a break. Old Grandma Fujimoto has invited everyone to a beautiful hot springs retreat. Surely we can have one good trip without something crazy happening!
This is an ON-GOING Charp roleplay that's just meant as silly character developing fun! You absolutely DO NOT need to read any backlogs or know what's happened in the past to join in.
This is a SOCIAL ROLEPLAY WITH IMPROVISATIONAL GAME MASTERING. That means the object of this roleplay is to interact with other characters, and from those interactions I will create a plot and story around you. The majority of this roleplay will just be developing your character and interacting within the setting!
My roleplays are alwaysNEWBIE FRIENDLY so even if you are terrible at roleplay or have never participated in a ChaRP before, this will be easy for you to get involved in. :D Ask questions, let me know when you need help. I often give tips and direction out of character in the main chat room when people need a little direction.
It varies a lot depending on my schedule, unfortunately.
Preferred Character Gender
Primarily Prefer Male
I DON'T THINK I'M PLAYING RYUUJI BECAUSE I THINK DIANA FORGOT OUR PLOT
This is Ryuuji's bio tho
Role: Employee (Part-Time) RECENTLY QUIT
Appearance: 6'0", shaggy black hair, dark brown eyes, muscular build.
Personality: Smug dick but actually a good guy, just likes teasing people (especially if he thinks they're cute). Pretends he doesn't take anything seriously. Used to be a delinquent.
Romantic & Sexual Preference: Pretty much totally gay. Not into boobs.
It varies a lot depending on my schedule, unfortunately.
Preferred Character Gender
Primarily Prefer Male
Appearance: 5'3", messy dark hair, dark brown eyes. There is a tiny child in this giant hoodie somewhere.
Personality: Kuudere robobrat
Romantic & Sexual Preference: lol
I'm mostly used to Modern-Fantasy and things with some level of Slice of Life to them, though I'm willing to try anything even dice RP. I do think my fight scenes read a bit odd though, it's a work in progress... I also have a penchant for Comedy.
I can't copy Nickolaus' CS anymore soooo here's a link lol
Nickolaus Caeg 17/Male
Full Name: Nickolaus Morris Caeg Nicknames: Nic, Nick, Nicholas. (He doesn't really like these) Ca, Cae. Horoscope: Aries Birthday: April 17th Age: 17 Gender: Male Sexuality: Closet Homosexual Height: 5' 6'' (167cm) Blood Type: AB+ Alignment: Lawful Neutral Mental State: Highly possessive, prone to narcissistic and stalkerish tendencies Traits: Has a knack for ‘hitting where it hurts’ in arguments Skills: Being a walking encyclopedia and dictionary, all in one. Math (and most times faster than a calculator!). Knowing all of the constellations by memory. Hobbies: Stargazing, Reading science articles (especially if they’re space-related). Habits: Pushing his glasses up when he’s about to show off share some interesting info.
Personality: Nickolaus is the type of person that knows they’re smarter than most and doesn’t try to hide it, quite the opposite, it’s more like the teenager takes pride in showing off at every given opportunity. He will fix everyone’s typos and grammar on the go, yet not actually teach the other person about what they did wrong. That is unless they express confusion over it, then you can expect this guy to do so, nonchalantly, as if it was the most obvious and basic thing of the world. If they feel dumb, congratulations! Objective completed!
If correcting typos weren’t enough, Nickolaus is the perfect example of an annoying know-it-all, spouting trivia no one has asked for every other time, even about subjects he doesn’t quite understand all that much. If it turns out he’s wrong? Welp, forget admitting things! His ego just wouldn’t allow it, nah, the most you get is a half-made excuse and a change of subject… Oh, and if he’s ever put ‘against a wall’ for whatever might be the reason, he lashes out.
See, Cae likes to think that he’s got it all going for him, that he’s the center of the world and should be treated as such. To be suddenly pulled down from his delusional pedestal is an attack worse than death and so when it happens, Nickolaus feels personally threatened, cornered and things are blown irrationally out of proportion. That when harsh truths are usually said under scoffs. There’s not really a distinction between friend and enemy at this point, there’s just him and his wounded, aching ego. If it takes dragging someone else down to the mud to fix this, then so be it.
In contrast to the teen’s harsh, ice-cold core, the usual Nickolaus is at a first glance, just an annoying geek, who takes delight in correcting people and is a big suck-up for the rules. Oh yeah, don’t let this fellow see anyone break any type of moral code or school rules, he won’t hesitate to tattle on people either.
Backstory: Being the only son of a couple of Philippine descendants, Nickolaus was raised under the strict order of a typical Asian family. It wasn't difficult to figure out that if he acted properly he'd get praised and if he acted badly he'd get punished and like most children of a young age, the boy longed to make his parents proud of him. As such, Cae never missed a class, often made research on the subjects in class on his own and would bring his findings to the next lessons, impressing both teachers and other students alike.
Eventually, what had started as an innocent call for his parents' attention had devolved into something else. Praise and recognition were great and he wanted more of that. The teen strived to be the top of his class and when that hadn't been enough he worked extra hard to be the number one student of the whole school. There was absolutely nothing that he couldn't accomplish. On top of doing research on his own accord, the boy had also joined and excelled at both the Academic Decathlon team and the Chess club, though he got tired of the later one pretty fast, deeming it not challenging enough.
Friendships were never really a worry to him, and though other hard-working students just naturally orbited around Nickolaus he never really considered them his friends, just acquaintances at best. When girls confessed their love to him, he would kindly turn them down, unable to reciprocate their feelings, or even understand them. Though eventually, he had come to realize that there was one of the fellow Class Presidents of his grade he harboured an odd admiration for, Alex, a blonde, cheerful and genuine male student, who made nerd jokes here and there and whose smile shone like the sun… Whose girlfriend had come to pick him up after a meeting.
That’s when Cae came to understand both the pains of love and raging fires of jealousy, but still, the call for Academic excellence was too strong and all these complicated feelings, that were messing up with his rationality were threatening to put everything he had worked for thus far into jeopardy. In the end, the teenager just kept going as if nothing had happened. He had gotten usually good at hiding his true intentions after all. Something as complex, scrambling and frustrating as love, was simply not worth the time or effort.
The parents were present and all, but on their perspective as long as his grades didn’t falter there wasn’t anything wrong. They still don’t know about their son’s orientation and hopefully never will. Cae would definitely like for them to stay in the dark eternally about that one. Near them, the boy’s actions also contribute to maintaining said illusion, as he puts on a more pleasant persona around the two who remain ignorant of the adoration-starved monster they’ve raised.
Reads periodic for leisure time;
Avoids talking about family at all;
Aims to study Astrophysics in college;
Knows every single constellation by memory;
His last name, Caeg, means 'a boastful person' in Ilocano (one of the many Phillipine dialects).
MACHO CAFE - LOVE IS IN THE AIR 2022-02-11T14:00:00-6 Fujimoto Hinata is an old woman, but she runs a very successful cafe. The theme? Macho Men! If you're a guy that doesn't mind being ogled by cafe guests, come on in and work for Fujimotosama! It's the season of LOVE and the cafe is decked...
Diana: It's VALENTINE'S DAY at the Macho Cafe and many of our employees seem to have secret admirers. But all has not been well for the Fujimotos and their staff. The Neko Cafe has not only been stealing all of their customers, they also apply bullying and sabotage techniques to try and ruin the business. It's suspected they even have a local gang in their pocket hired to occasionally vandalize, steal stuff, and harass the team! Can this adorable Valentine's Day event draw in enough customers to save the Cafe, or is the Macho Cafe going to close for good?!
Today at 12:47 PM
Hiromi Fujimoto, the esteemed granddaughter of oooold Hinata, is one of those people in dire straights. Ever since Ryuuji QUIT, it's been even more chaos and hell at the cafe than usual! For one, no one around here could make pastries like Ryuuji, so Hiromi's been trying to do it and she's the worst cook ever. Secondly, as the heir to the Macho Cafe, Hiromi's been under a lot of that stupid Neko Cafe's phycological (and physical) warfare. The cafe is close to ruin! What is she supposed to do! WHO ORDEREED ALL OF THESE ROSES SHE CAN'T STOP SNEEZING.
Today at 12:52 PM
The guest that walked into the cafe appeared to be about 75% hoodie. The hem hung down almost to the wearer's knees, their hands in the front pocket. A pair of large dark eyes blinked out from under the hood. "Where is everyone?" a soft voice asked flatly from the depths of the hoodie.
Today at 1:05 PM
Why did Nickolaus come back after the disaster of last time? Well... He's not sure himself, but he has a newfound enemy to defeat... ÉCLAIRS. He kept trying the recipe out, again and again and again, but no matter how precise the measurements, how efficient the methods, they were not perfect! And this simply would not do! It's cooking! It shouldn't be acting like some sort of deep-rooted mystery, but it did not make any sense! And so, here he was, standing at the entrance of the kitchen again. ...And now what?
Today at 1:06 PM
Diana: "Dead," exclaimed Grandma Fujimoto. Despite the fact there were some of her old lady club happily playing Mahjong at a corner table. "All dead."
Today at 1:07 PM
"Oh no." The hoodie-clad creature nodded its hooded head and scuttled toward an empty booth.
Today at 1:08 PM
"Can you handle all of this," Hiromi asked Nickolaus. He'd BETTER handle it, because she'd already burned several trays worth of muffins and cupcakes. The kitchen was a disaster and this time it was all Hiromi's fault! "I'm better off in the dining room making sure Obaachan doesn't doom and gloom everyone away!"
Today at 1:09 PM
Aki had had a change in his fortunes since the last time he was at the ridiculously named Macho Cafe. His parents had moved away and now he was on his own and had gasp! pocket money! Plus it was spring and Aki had a new magazine to read and what better place was a cafe that he knew that Ryuuji was NOT at? Perfection! He sat down at a table with his camping magazine, wearing one of his absolutely horrible brown and green baggy Mori Boy but not cute outfits. Like he had raided someone's Grandpa's wardrobe and only took the worst things.
Today at 1:10 PM
Could he handle all of that? Well, not to his standards apparently, no. But- Seeing the state of the kitchen, something stirred out inside of him and Nickolaus declared, that the kitchen would be immaculate at the end of his shift! If only to make up for the atrocities that he would be cooking today. "Well, they'd at least be edible, so I suppose that yes, I can!", it wasn't going to be perfection but, right now they just needed something useful, anything, "Simply point me in the direction of the recipes and leave it to me. I shall save at least the food section of this establishment.", for his honor and the privilege of staring at plumpy men's butts!
Today at 1:15 PM
"Excuse me," a monotone voice piped up in Aki's ear. It was the hoodie-swaddled stranger. "Aren't there supposed to be waiters here?"
Today at 1:16 PM
Right on cue Hiromi stalked out of the kitchen into the dining room. Because they were short on staff, Hiromi had dressed up as "one of the guys". Apparently that meant a tight tank top and a pair of baggy jeans that suspiciously looked like they were stolen from one of their much taller former employees. Her hair was in a pony tail and she'd applied some eyeliner cause she thought it made her look more manly. "Is there a princess or prince in here that needs their order taken..." she grumbled. That was pretty man-like, right? Being scowly!
Today at 1:16 PM
...Alright, that's fine, Nickolaus supposed that he could find the recipe book himself then. While also beginning to clean and organize this mess, who lets their kitchen even get to this state??!
Today at 1:18 PM
Aki just pointed at Hiromi because why was someone talking in his ear! He didn't approve! He whipped his head around to stare at the hoody-wearing weirdo after that. "Have at it, I can wait." After all. He did have a magazine. Which he now used as a sort of barrier between him and the ear-whisperer.
Today at 1:19 PM
Diana: Nickolaus would find that without Ryuuji running the kitchen, things were a bit.... out of place. Generally Miss Hiromi was very good at making sure necessary things got ordered and the general business management of the cafe - but she was a TERRIBLE kitchen manager. And even worse chef. It's pretty clear she had exploded an entire roast a few days prior, and there was evidence of a fire or two.
Today at 1:20 PM
Slowly, the hoodie creature rose an arm. The end of the sleeve slipped back to reveal that there was in fact a human shape under there. "Do I have to be a prince or princess?"
Today at 1:21 PM
Zarko Straadi: Kimiko walked down the street, hoping to clear the fog from her mind. After the New Year's Shooting at Studio Wolf, she'd had to go a few rounds with police and reporters and detectives, and just trying to process the shock of being right next to the apparent target of the shooter at the time had rattled her creativity. While she had lots more subscribers, and Patreons, her expanded viewing audience also included a supply of trolls and creeps. But...there were Patreons, and she needed to produce some new songs for them. Looking up, she saw a sign: Macho Cafe, it said. Strong coffee? That sounds like a good idea! she thought, heading for it. She made a couple more taps at the tablet she was carrying, trying out a different baseline. She was listening to the sample when she pushed through the doors and looked up. "Wha?" Everyone was wearing tight tank tops and jeans (well, except for one of them, who could have been wearing their big brother's pants). "Is there a princess or prince in here that needs their order taken?" that one said. Not able to make sense of that, Kimiko waited to be seated.
Today at 1:23 PM
Loveless: This. This was Nickolaus' example of a horror movie in real life. At least, he expected that most germs had died on the fire but stiillll!! Okay, inhale, exhale- Burnt trays go on the sink, for now, he needed the oven space open! Then check if the recipes said anything about pre-heating the oven and such, do that, set a timer because he remembered they had no clocks on the wall there. It should be enough time to get some cleaning supplies and come back, right? Right!
Today at 1:25 PM
"You could be a street goblin too, whatever you like!" huffed Hiromi. Being charming to customers was definitely not Hiromi's skill either. "Today's special for Valentine's is... um... The Heart of Eros! That usually comes with a handsome table dance by one of our waiters, but there's just me today. So you're getting toasted chocolate buns frosted with pink icing."
Today at 1:28 PM
"...Okay." The street goblin sat down at the table across from Aki.
Today at 1:30 PM
Diana: Nickolaus really had the best of intentions, but when he opened the closet door to look for more cleaning supplies, there were two tall and skinnyass thugs wearing cat ears, just lounging in there as if they owned the place. "What do we have here?" One asked. "Looks like a meatsack to play with." Who were these creeps?!
Today at 1:36 PM
Zarko Straadi: Street goblin? Do I need to 'be' something? Kimiko thought. A quick glance around the restaurant: there were decorations for Valentine's Day, not Halloween, and there were no signs saying anything about a costume contest or LARP going on this evening. And what were the odds that she would run into the one cafe that was being used for the site of an ARG?
Today at 1:38 PM
Glorious. Exactly what Aki wanted. A 'street goblin'. "No dancing, please. Just a coffee and a bun, thank you." He did have manners somewhere. Probably in a pocket. He studiously ignored the hoody goblin thing, hiding behind his magazine before making a noise in his throat. "Don't you want to... I don't know. Go... " He waved a hand. "Elsewhere."
Today at 1:40 PM
"No." The goblin raised a hand again. "I also want coffee. With ice cream in it."
Today at 1:42 PM
"...oh", with an eerie calm, demeanor, Nickolaus simply reached for his phone, any important numbers in the speed-dial, his finger on the button. At the same time, discreetly, he tried to reach for a broom that was resting by the side. "I will only say this once, get back out from the backdoor the way you rats have probably gotten yourselves in, or I'm calling the police. This is trespassing and you both know that very well."
Today at 1:44 PM
"A bun and coffee for the one who scared off my only good employee," Oh it seemed Hiromi did remember Aki even if she hadn't acknowledged it, "A coffee with ice cream for the goblin. Aaand," she turned on a heel to point her pen at Kimiko, then paused for a minute squinting at the girl. There was some recognition somewhere, but Hiromi couldn't quite place it. "What would you like?"
Today at 1:44 PM
"And the special," the goblin interrupted. "Coffee with ice cream and the special."
Today at 1:46 PM
Diana: "The police aren't going to show up here, are they, Brucey?" said the first. "Naw, pretty sure they're paid off, Butcher." chuckled the second one. What fucking weirdos. They did come out of the closet though to start shoving at Nickolaus. "Still not closed huh? I guess we might have to actually start hurting some people!"
Today at 1:47 PM
Whoops. Ryuuji's girlfriend remembered him! "He started it." He said, puffing out his cheeks, which with his oversized glasses made him look like a really weird chipmunk. "I tried to be nice." He said, lying through his teeth. "Besides, he's your boyfriend. He should have stayed anyway."
Today at 1:50 PM
Ah diplomacy... So sadly unappreciated, but rules were rules after all- Nickolaus did say that he was only giving the warning once. He lets himself get shoved a bit, building his attacker's sense of superiority and then 'WHACK!', the until now unseen broom went down at the head of one of the thugs without hesitation. Even now, Nickolaus almost seemed bored, looking at them with no more than contempt. "Cockroaches... Lowly beings like you deserve no mercy.", he brought the broom over again, this time going for a 'stab' against the other one's gut!
Today at 1:54 PM
"Uh..." Kimiko said. The host was squinting at her in an odd way. Kimiko looked down at herself, just in case there was anything catastrophic was wrong with her wardrobe. She wore a futuristic dress with a bit of post-Apocalyptic vibe, but she couldn't see anything to merit the odd looks she was getting. "Sorry, I didn't see the menu..." she said. Aaaand this was one reason Kimiko didn't go to restaurants often. It seemed like each one had its own set of rules--wait to be seated, seat yourself, order at your table or up in front, make reservations Y/N, and on it went. Other people seemed to have ways of understanding what sort of rule-set a given restaurant was operating under. But this one seemed...unusual...even by restaurant standards.
Today at 1:55 PM
"Oh! Sorry, I guess I'm so used to the regulars I didn't even think about that!" Hiromi took a moment to shoot Aki the most deadly of glare, but didn't respond to his STUPID and WRONG comments about Ryuuji being her boyfriend. Instead, she very politely gestured Kimiko towards a nice comfortable table and handed her one of the cafe's cute little laminated menus. Of course, almost everything food-related had been scribbled out due to Hiromi being the worst chef, but the drinks menu seemed delightful -- and the Hot Macho Buns seemed... interesting?
Today at 1:58 PM
Diana: THE FIGHT COMMENCED. Brucey was the one caught over the head with the broom handle, and Butcher got a thump to the gut. While Butcher was snarling away, Brucey lept onto Nickolaus' back and attempted to choke hold him. Butcher then tackled the two of them, sending all three guys crashing to the floor!
Today at 2:00 PM
"You scared off her boyfriend," the hoodie said. Two elbows went on the table, propping what was presumably a chin in its small hands as eyes peered out at Aki intently. "Which one are you? You're not Naokun."
Today at 2:02 PM
The sound of a !WHACK! made Kimiko jump out of her skin. "Cockroaches... Lowly beings like you deserve no mercy!" a voice growled from back...in the kitchen? They have cockroaches...? That alone was enough to make her reconsider her choice of restaurant...until she heard what sounded like a brawl coming from the kitchen. "Uh...what is that?" she said, glancing in the direction of the increasing sounds of violence.
Today at 2:03 PM
"Apparently I'm very scary and great at scaring off boyfriends," Aki said and then flipped another page of the magazine. He blinked at the hoody goblin curiously. It was very small. "I don't know what a Naokun is." But Aki jumped at the noise of a fight coming from the kitchen. "I'm Andou." The little goblin wasn't getting his first name.
Today at 2:07 PM
Not sure how one of them had managed to slip past him for such a maneuver, but Nickolaus still had a broom that had a direct encounter with Bruce's face the moment he had tried that. Eat wood, he supposed- ah dammit, he had stopped paying attention to the second guy and now he was sandwiched in-between them. Well, hopefully, the yet another blow to the head was disorienting the one in the bottom a bit, while the one on the top was getting a kick... right in the gut again, yep, exactly where he had already suffered from the broom before, for extra pain. Then he attempted to push Butcher back off him, trying to roll off to the right and away of this weird sweaty men pile. ...Had this been a different occasion he might have enjoyed that a bit more... shame.
Today at 2:07 PM
"Aki Andou," the goblin intoned. "Oh. I see."
Today at 2:09 PM
Diana: Nickolaus kicked the one guy real good - Butcher when flying through the kitchen door and landed in the dining room with a crash! Brucey was still all over Nickolaus though, and the pair went rolling into the dining too. Two tall skinnyass catboy thugs and Nickolaus were now rolling about the dining room floor. Grandma Fujimoto finally perked up from her gloom. "Oi!! Now this is what's what! Just like when I was a girl! You beat the snot out of these Neko Cafe Goons, get 'em! Get 'em good, Nicky!"
Today at 2:11 PM
"Wonderful. You know who I am." Aki stood up and looked crossly down at the goblin who he was pretty sure was a child. Because there was men rolling around and fighting on the floor! He rolled up his magazine and strode over, it was more impressive in his head, and used the mag to Bap! the cat-eared thug on the head!
Today at 2:12 PM
"Not these two again," cried Hiromi. They'd definitely been harassing her before. "You BETTER do something, Aki! This wouldn't be happening if Ryuuji were still here!"
Today at 2:13 PM
"It was your fault, actually," piped up the hoodie creature, who had somehow managed to sneak up next to Hiromi while everyone was distracted by the chaos. "Niichan's upset." The hood came back, revealing a short teenager with a mess of black hair and an expressionless face. "...I can see why." And the goblin stuck out their tongue, pulling down on one eye to make a face at her.
Today at 2:17 PM
Zarko Straadi: Kimiko blinked in astonishment. Another crime scene?! she thought. Maybe the post-Apocalyptic vibe of her dress was fitting after all? It would have been scarier if not for the ridiculous attire of two of the combatants. Instead, it was surreal.
Today at 2:17 PM
"MY fault?! I didn't even do anything to Ryuuji!" who was this little goblin anyway, Hiromi wondered!
Today at 2:19 PM
"Bottle!", Nickolaus yells at whoever might want to help out, "Just grab one and knock them out!" At the same time, Nickolaus is punching Brucey's face again and again, followed by elbowing the man's side every time he pulls his arm back, for maximum efficiency. Butcher would be smart to stay away because there are legs failing everywhere and he's bound to get kicked in the gut a third time.
Today at 2:19 PM
"Fine! But only until Hirohata is working for you again, he can't sulk forever!" After all, they were dating. He wouldn't just abandon his girlfriend. Right? Right. Aki put his hands on his slender hips and then realized the goblin said... Niichan. Was this Ryuuji's little brother! Aki bapped Brucey's head again with his magazine like he was chastizing a dog.
Today at 2:20 PM
Diana: The rolled up magazine didn't do NOTHING but knock that dumb catboy's dumb ears off - which oh no. Was a huge mistake. Brucey stood up with a loud YAAAAARRRRRRRRGGHH and ripped off his shirt to reveal an obscene amount of muscles and grabbed Aki by the shirt. "Alright you little twerp! I'm going to throw your ass into the sun!"
Today at 2:21 PM
"I'll call Niichan to help you if you say you're sorry," the hoodie-clad teen said. A sleeve came up; a hand patted Hiromi on the top of her head. "Okay. Bow."
Today at 2:23 PM
Aha! He was now free! So of course, without time to lose Nickolaus grabbed the first glass thing he could reach and chucked it at Brucey's head. Bonus points if it was full of some drink and extra bonus points if it was hot coffee!!
Today at 2:24 PM
"What do I even have to say sorry about?! He abandoned ME to this nonsense!!!" Hiromi shouted at the little goblin! UGH! Really there was a lot to say about stupid Ryuuji, but first these catboys.... Huffing, she slid the goblin out of the way and grabbed up one of the cafe chairs. While Nickolaus accosted Brucey who was assaulting Aki, Hiromi hit Butcher in the back with the chair! "I AM SO SORRY MISS, I WILL GIVE YOU A DISCOUNT ON TODAY'S PASTRIES!" she shouted in Kimiko's direction.
Today at 2:27 PM
Aki put his hand in the face of the raging muscle head. "Excuse me, what? Why is he mad at her? He should be mad AT ME! I am the thorn in his side! She's just his dumb girlfriend! I am a real rival! A rival!" Aki raged, twisting in the grip of the muscle weirdo! "I AM THE SOURCE OF ALL HIS ANGERRRRR!"
Today at 2:27 PM
"Fiancee," corrected the hoodie goblin, who had pulled out a cell phone from somewhere and sat down on a still-upright table. "Fiancee, technically. Not girlfriend."
Today at 2:32 PM
Hiromi stopped midway of smashing that Butcher catboy. "He's NOT my boyfriend! Where did you even get fiancee?! Oh my go--EEEEP!" Amidst all her screaming Butcher yanked her up by her huge baggy boy pants and just held her dangling in air. After some flailing, Hiromi finally just gave up and went limp! This was her life now! The cafe was over! Taken over by the Neko Cafe Goons!
Today at 2:36 PM
None. Of. This. Made. Sense. Kimiko was rather bad at reading social cues, and understanding the unwritten rules of people in groups, and likewise for their webs of interpersonal drama. But all this seemed...not normal, surely? One of the combatants yelled at her, snapping her out of a fugue. ...Offering her a discount on pastries? I swear, I didn't take any acid!
Today at 2:37 PM
"Fine! She's his dumb fiancee! I am the rival! She makes for happiness, I make for rage!" Aki lashed out with a booted foot straight towards the thug's bits! He'd been beat-up enough to know how to get someone to drop him. Aim for the dick! "And you! Girl! If you're gonna marry that idiot, I suggest putting a collar and leash on him so he doesn't run off every time he sulks!"
Today at 2:39 PM
Loveless: Nickolaus wasn't giving up that easily, and kept smashing glasses at the attackers waiting for some kind of reaction. If these failed, there were always cutlery to try next...
Today at 2:39 PM
Somewhere across town, Ryuuji's mail tone went off. He checked his phone to find a new picture message. It was a selfie of Ruka--for that was the hoodie goblin's name--tongue out, with the chaos of the catboy brawl in the background, including Hiromi hanging upside-down and Aki in the hold of Brucey. Ryuuji sat bolt upright in bed. "What the fuck?!"
Today at 2:43 PM
Diana: Old Grandma Fujimoto was oddly quiet during THIS exchange, in fact one might say she looked like she'd swallowed a big old frog, considering a couple of rival goons were trying to destroy her cafe and some kid had just come in here and announced her granddaughter was engaged. "My, my, my! Look at the time! I am late for my pedicure appointment! Let me just grab my purse and my keys..." Obaachan didn't even drive. --- MEANWHILE, Nickolaus finally managed to crash enough bottles over Butcher's head that he dropped Hiromi to a heap on the floor before passing out. Aki on the other hand was BODILY THROWN across the cafe.
Today at 2:45 PM
As soon as Brucey had thrown Aki, Nickolaus came in with yet another chair assault towards the back, just as the other was still distracted with the last action.
Today at 2:49 PM
Diana: THUNK. Brucey landed on the floor as well. Two tall skinnyass catboy thugs sprawled unconscious on the floor, and one confused and defeated Hiromi. Grandma Fujimoto was already at the cafe door. "Well, well, it seems you lot have this handled! I'll go tell the Neko Cafe we have hostages."
Today at 2:51 PM
"You did it. Yay." Ruka held up both arms.
Today at 2:52 PM
Aki was great at falling, thank you! He was thrown and he rolled expertly so he didn't break himself or his phone! He sat in a crumble of brown clothing and chin-length fluffy hair fluffing all about. He was a mess. But! He was triumphant as only a small nerd could be after surviving something! "I'm only staying here until Hirohata shows up and claims you and this mess." He climbed to his feet.
Today at 2:53 PM
Then Kimiko recalled the stuff about 'prince or princess' and 'being' a street-goblin she'd heard upon entering. Could this be a performance? she thought. But the second she considered that hypothesis the 'source of anger' guy was thrown right at her! With a squeal, she tried to retreat toward her booth, but the side of its seat hit her legs. "AAAH!" She pinwheeled with one arm (the other holding her precious tablet with hours of work on it, which she hadn't backed up to thumb drive because she had not anticipated being in the middle of a bar fight--cafe fight? Kimiko had never heard of such a thing), but to no avail, as she fell into the booth with an unceremonious thump. Hostages? Seriously?! A...cafe-based gang war?
Today at 2:54 PM
Hiromi sat up and attempted to dust herself off. "He's NOT my stupid fiancee, he's NOT going to come here and fix everything, and yes... yes you ARE going to stay here and help clean up this entire mess! You're officially one of the Macho Cafe staff! And Obaachan, where are you going!" she shouted after her grandmother, but damn that old lady was fast when she wanted to be!
Today at 2:55 PM
"Send them the collateral damage bills too!", Nickolaus had added, for a moment standing triumphantly like a champion amidst a battlefield, but soon enough also going down once adrenaline started doing its thing. Ahh shit- Everything hurts. Maybe the Neko Café should handle the hospital bills too...
Today at 2:59 PM
"He's not going to come here because all you ever do is yell at him," chimed in Ruka, then looked at Aki. "Same as you, I guess..."
Today at 2:59 PM
"He is too!" Aki yelled right back at Hiromi and then realized he was sitting on someone in a booth. "Whoops! I'm sorry, Miss." He wriggled off her and then helped her up with a charming smile, tucking his hair behind his ears. Then he turned back to Hiromi! "You wanna bet? He'll be here so fast and fix all your nonsense! And then you're gonna marry him! And I will only stay until that happens!" He looked down. "I lost my copy of Camping Happiness! Where did it go?"
Today at 2:59 PM
"He's not coming back! He's left and we all just have to DEAL WITH IT and you know what, I don't want his stupid face back anyway if he's just going to run away because of a little screaming! All we ever do here is yell and get into fights THAT'S JUST HOW WE EXPRESS LOVE." Hiromi then stomped over to an overturned table to pick up a rumpled looking book, then chuck it right at Aki's head. "You're going to be trapped here forever waiting for Ryuuji! Go get a broom to clean up all this glass!"
Today at 3:02 PM
Diana: The catboys on the ground were starting to moan and groan. Oh no, were they waking up from their stupor?
59 minutes ago
"Thank you..." Kimiko said to Thrown Object Guy was charming and polite...then he turned to the person he was arguing with and started talking in word salad. Camping happiness? "WAH!" Kimiko cried, ducking under the flying book. Should I call the police? Again? If I'd been streaming this no one would believe me!
58 minutes ago
Astaroth: "THAT'S JUST HOW WE EXPRESS LOVE," repeated a canned, electronic copy of Hiromi's voice. Ruka pressed send. "...I still want my food and coffee."
56 minutes ago
Loveless: FUCK- Nickolaus tried diving into the ground to reach the broom again, but his whole body protested in a symphony straight out of hell and stiffened his movements. Even so, he kept trying to get to it... It was so close- "Urgh, come here you- stupid- BrooOoom-!"
56 minutes ago
Aki grabbed his book out of the air and then found a broom! He did not sweep up the glass but instead starting sweeping the goonish catboys towards the front door. Prodding them as he did so. "Hah! That's what you think! And Hirohata isn't supposed to like me! He hates me. We're very fond of that feeling." He said proudly. He kicked one of the goons viciously. "So. Very. Fond!"
56 minutes ago
Diana: Luckily for Nickolaus, Brucey and Butcher were being violently swept and kicked out the front door. Their groans were satisfying.
54 minutes ago
Exhausted, there's nothing left to Nickolaus than to stay on the floor and just, exist, he guessed. He can finally rest his head against the surface, not passing out, but not really able to do much else either. ...Hopefully, the oven was not preheating when this mess started.
53 minutes ago
"Are you recording me?! Ugh!" What did Hiromi even expect, their cafe guests were always so strange! At least this one wasn't trying to destroy the cafe. "Nickolaus, get off the floor, you're not trashed that badly. ....I'll get the first aid kit. And um... um... drinks. Drinks for everyone."
52 minutes ago
Zarko Straadi: Should I clap? Kimiko thought. If the main combatant was acting, he was very good, but...it was seeming much more likely that he was really hurt. The other option, apart from clapping, was to call the police...more police questioning, more State attorneys, more detectives and reporters. "Uh...are you really hurt? Do you need me to call for an ambulance?"
48 minutes ago
"...I can't.", Nickolaus replied, somewhat sounding annoyed by the commentary, even with the muffled sound of his voice projected against the floor, "My limbs will not react, I might have overdone it." As surprising as this might be, he was not used to brawling... Of any kind. The most he had tried was fencing and, it was kind of boring. "I don't think that will be necessary, but I might need a while to rest..."
46 minutes ago
"For science," Ruka told Hiromi. The teen hopped off the table and shuffled toward Aki. The sleeves went up and over the boy's shoulders, clinging on while he tried to sweep. "...Hm. You're too short to give me a piggyback ride."
46 minutes ago
"I'll get some ice for Nickolaus too..." scowled Hiromi.
45 minutes ago
"I'm not short, I am perfectly proportioned for my genetics!" Aki huffed out at the little teen who was clinging to him. "Shoo, Hirohata-chibi, shoo. I've got things to do since I guess I work here now. Which I mean, I needed a job for camping money... Works out just fine. But only till your Nii-chan gets his head on straight."
41 minutes ago
"HE'S NOT COMING!" screamed Hiromi as she stomped away to the back kitchen to find those promised drinks. She supposed she owed everyone free coffee and chocolate buns now. The cafe was done for! They could never pay for all of this!
39 minutes ago
"He's totally here," announced Ruka, complete with jazz hands, just before none other than Ryuuji kicked open the front door. The older Hirohata had clearly gotten ready in a hurry, not even bothering to put on his jacket or tie back his hair in a stubby ponytail. "What," panted Ryuuji, "the fuck?"
35 minutes ago
Zarko Straadi: Kimiko paused. Observation: no one else in the restaurant was calling for police or an ambulance...so that had to weigh in the assessment of posterior probability that he was not seriously hurt. At least there was no gun involved. But...how much evidential weight should the behavior of the others here carry...when they were pretty much incomprehensible?
35 minutes ago
"Can't you bring that ice any faster...?", Nickolaus complained from his spot in the ground. He was hurt, but could still be an ass about things.
31 minutes ago
Oh no. Hiromi hadn't even made it to the kitchen door when she froze solid. This JERK had the nerve to just show up now, after EVERYTHING and HE-- Hiromi sloooooowly turned on her heels, unbuckled her belt and pulled off those baggy jeans. In a silent stone-faced fury she folded them neatly, then CHUCKED THEM ACROSS THE CAFE RIGHT AT RYUUJI'S FACE WITH THE FORCE OF A THOUSAND SUNS. "YOU FORGOT YOUR STUPID PANTS, ASSHOLE. BYE FOREVER." She and her cute ducky panties then stomped away to the kitchen for Nickolaus's stupid ice!
31 minutes ago
"That was incredibly short employment! See? I told you he'd show up." Aki said smugly but didn't stop sweeping up the mess because he liked sweeping. "Hirohata. Your fiancee apparently - oh there she goes, taking off her pants." Aki kept riiiiight on sweeping. "You had better fix this or you won't get to have a summer wedding."
29 minutes ago
"I am experiencing a day of maximal improbability," Kimiko muttered to herself as the young woman stormed off to the kitchen sporting ducky underpants.
27 minutes ago
"What?" squawked Ryuuji, ducking the denim hurtling at his head. "What the fuck, Andou, what are you still doing here! What did you do?!" He'd barely gotten the question out when Ruka started crawling up his back like a monkey, arms going around his throat. "Dammit, Ruka--"
Hiromi did not fail in doing exactly what she promised! She acquired a big bag of ice and a tray full of coffees and chocolate buns. Without acknowledging any of the chaos in the main dining room, she dumped the bag of ice on top of Nickolaus, and went about setting the coffee and chocolate buns at the respective tables for Aki, the chaos goblin, and the girl that Hiromi was starting to realize was a very popular internet star and now she'd just gone and made the WORST IMPRESSION AND IT'S PROBABLY RYUUJI'S FAULT. She of course, did this still in her underwear and ignore Ryuuji.
23 minutes ago
"I have done nothing except be kind and helpful to your fiancee! You should be thanking me." Aki stated smugly. "But now my bun has arrived." He sat down the money on the table, stuffed the bun in his mouth, shot Ryuuji a smirk and left! Bun in mouth. Like a weirdo.
22 minutes ago
"You little shit, I'm not done talking to you!" Ryuuji yelled after him, struggling with the smaller teen on his back. "I'll hunt you down! Don't think I forgot you APOLOGIZED to me!"
20 minutes ago
"People are strange...when you're a stranger..." Kimiko sang softly to herself in an eerie melodic voice. "AHA! THAT'S IT!" She woke her tablet, giving a brief smile to the person who brought her a coffee and chocolate buns--a moment of surprise when she saw they were actually baked in the shape of buns--but neither that, or the yelling argument could pull her focus from her tablet as she started changing instrumentation and chord progressions. That tinny piano the Doors used for the instrumental solo, the subtle Gothic vibe under the '60's psychedelia, that was exactly what the piece she was working on needed!
"Heeey, Hiromi-san! Can I have a bun too?", was he taking a bit too much advantage from this? Maybe. But he did kick the asses of two big dudes so he thought that he deserved some appreciation! Nickolaus may not have saved the kitchen or the food today, but he did a lot more than that! Those éclairs can be dealt with another time...
7 minutes ago
With Andou gone, Ryuuji heaved an exasperated sigh and shook free of Ruka. Leaving the little brat back at the scene of the daily chaos, he went stalking after Hiromi, a deep frown on his face as he caught up to the panty-clad girl. "...Oi, Fujimoto. We need to talk."
4 minutes ago Zarko Straadi: Kimiko hit playback, listening to the music through a wireless earbud. It would need some polishing, but now she'd hit on a new inspiration: the events she'd witnessed were just surreal enough to belong in a Serendipity Starchaser story, of the sort she incorporated into her songs. "Excuse me," Kimiko said to Ducky Underpants Lady as she passed. "I...have a Youtube channel, and I produce...science fiction EBM rock opera..." she said--it wasn't exactly a genre, since so far as she knew she was the only one who did it. "Would it be alright if I used this place as a setting for a scene in one of my stories?"
5 minutes ago
Diana: Another strange day ends at the Macho Cafe. Will the Neko Cafe start getting even more violent to ensure the closure of Macho Cafe? Why did Fujimoto-sama sneak off like she had some BIG SECRET she didn't want to tell everyone? Is Hiromi ever going to talk to Ryuuji again?! Is Aki Ruka's new boyfriend?! Can Kimoko ever go somewhere without a brawl breaking out? Will Nickolaus ever manage to make the perfect eclair? FIND OUT NEXT TIME ON.... MACHO CAFE.
SKIN DETAILS: Fair skin tone, has a tattoo of a cross on the inside of her left forearm, with a passage from the Gnostic text Thunder, Perfect Mind in Koine Greek that crosses it to go around her forearm like a bracelet.
BUILD: Slender and petite with firm muscle tone.
HEALTH CONDITIONS/NOTES: Autism spectrum, ADHD
OTHER NOTABLE FEATURES: Kimiko wears futuristic clothing that usually involves the use of 3-D printing and/or unusual materials, incorporating elements of Buckminster Fuller's "Synergetic Geometry" and biomimicry with a hint of 1960's Mod aesthetic. Her color scheme is usually white, light pastel colors, or iridescent "holographic" fabrics, and sometimes she includes fiberoptics or LED lighting effects. If you ask her "What planet are you from, anyway?!" and she says "Gliese 581g--well actually most of us live in O'Neill Cylinders and the Orbital Ring!"...you just might believe her.
PERSONALITY: High-Energy | Cheerful | Very Eccentric | Optimistic | Innocent | Sense of Wonder | Kind | Spontaneous | People: How Do They Work? | Attention Zips From One Thing to the Next | Oblivious to Social Cues | Non-Conformist | Respectful to Elders | Wants to Help Create a Better World
DISLIKES: Country music | Baseball caps | Cars | Pushy, Entitled People | Narrow-Mindedness | Bigotry | Wastefulness | Clutter | Ugly or Wasteful Design
EXTRA: Kimiko produces electronic music with a futuristic, upbeat psychedelic sound, singing her own vocals. She has an album's worth of songs, all set in a science fiction universe for which she's written a novel, so that the songs and story reference each other. Unable to succeed at jumping through the hoops of the music industry, she has self-published her works. They make her a modest amount of money so far, but she has yet to attract much notice beyond a small but loyal fandom. She also has a moderately successful YouTube channel and podcast, where she gives short rhapsodic talks about "exponential technology," scientific mysticism, and the future. Her novel is a science fiction story that integrates E-8 Cosmology with Jacques Vallee's writings on the UFO phenomenon, the paranormal, along with sci-fi Gnosticism, Hermeticism, Chaos Magic, and the latest eco-technology.
Her performing name is Serendipity Starchaser, also the name of her YouTube channel and the protagonist of her story universe.
Code by MaryGold. Edited by Black_Sheep & Jenamos.
(This is the only ref I have of him- it’s kinda out-of-date and his hair style is a bit more ‘poofy’ if that’s how you’d explain it)
Name: Russel (X_14_B) Age: 19 Species: Robot, but can very easily pass as human Gender: Technically doesn’t have one, but prefers to be seen and referred to as a male Sexuality: Gay Personality: Shy, kinda quiet, likes to make people happy, loyal, very obedient at times Role: Employee (Most likely full-time) Extra:
Russel isn’t a very tall robot, standing at about 4 foot, 8 inches.
The only things he can psychically consume are batteries and gasoline, and he doesn’t usually consume them often.
@FenFren This is an interesting character, but he would fit better in the upcoming "Toko Aida - The Gatorbat Culling Festival" CHARP (a sci-fi setting) than this one. IIRC, the "Macho Cafe" universe does not include magical, supernatural, or sci-fi elements (like sapient robots), but is an anime-flavored (without planet-wrecking superpowers or battlemech suits) present-day setting. Diana (the GM) can correct me if I'm wrong though.
There could be ways to adapt him for the Macho Cafe setting: he could be a human who thinks he's a robot, or styles himself as one, and he could have some body modifications (within existing technology) such as small magnets implanted in the fingertips to let him "feel" magnetic fields. There are hardcore Transhumanist types who do this sort of thing.
He could also "be" a robot for his "theme" as an employee of the Macho Cafe, in the same way that an employee of Disney World can "be" Cinderella. AFAIK color-changing mood-ring contact lenses are beyond current technology, but maybe he could have sets of different colored contacts, and some practice at switching them by sleight of hand.
At a stretch, he could be a real robot--a combination of the absolute best, cutting edge robotics and machine-learning software in the world. The Japanese have made some _fairly_ realistic-looking (but still Uncanny Valley) human-lookalike robots, but so far these are stationary or have very limited mobility. Boston Dynamics has robots that are fairly nimble and mobile, but do not look like humans at all, and have no ability to talk or relate to humans (read facial expressions, tone of voice, etc.). Google's Lambda chatbot AI has been in the news lately because one of the people working on it has come out and claimed that it is sapient because it is so good at mimicking human conversation, but this view is not accepted by Google or (AFAIK) the robotics/AI community as a whole. However, it would be extremely difficult and expensive (if it's possible at all) to combine all these things into one robot with current technology.
If Russel was a combination of all these things, he would be some powerful tech company's multi-billion dollar demonstration project, rather than "just another employee" at the Macho Cafe. As such, he would not have internal qualia of consciousness (there would be no such thing as "what it feels like to be him"). He would be programmed to act gay, but wouldn't actually _be_ gay in the sense of having internal feelings, desires, self-identification as gay, etc.. He would have a lot of limitations (he would be very clumsy in the kitchen compared to a human, would need to recharge or swap out batteries in minutes rather than hours, etc.). He would be incredibly valuable property of the company that made him, and he would have no freedom or even understanding of the concept. Realistically, he wouldn't go anywhere in public without a team of techies and corporate security guarding him.
IMO, the "real robot" approach would be the hardest to play in this CHARP, because you would be playing the role of some really high-grade software, rather than a person, and it would take a working knowledge of real-world robotics and AI technology to play accurately.
That said, I don't make the rules around here, Diana does. This is just to give you a heads-up about the potential problem for Russel in this setting, and toss out some ideas to adapt him to fit better if you want to stick with him for this CHARP. However, he would fit right in with the Toko Aida-verse, a sci-fi/fantasy setting in the vein of Star Wars and Star Trek. I'll do my best to answer any questions you might have.