I sooo should had followed my instincts the first time, rather than second guessing myself. Now, I so regret it.
You'd mentioned someone's jealousy before... Craz or Grut or both? IDK.
In the scene with Craz and Vel, when he was attempting to wake her up at the oncoming of friends and foes, I WAS (and SHOULD) going to have her wake up in that daze she was in, see green ears and assume it was Sleo waking her up. Then lean up to kiss him before falling out again. But, she kissed Craz instead, of course. Then, when she fully woke up - reconnecting to Suri - she regained her consciousness and awareness, but lost what she'd done in the fog.
Of course, Craz didn't forget, and with a kiss like hers (conscious or otherwise) he probably never will.
If you want to push this jealousy further, use it to bring about a conflict (or, according to Mona, a curse) that will break the group apart and give way to a bittersweet reunion later on, then I'll find that scene and alter mine slightly - to add the kiss. If you want, I'll let you know which page and Post number your response is, if you want to edit Craz's response to that kiss. Then, we can just continue with this jealousy angle.
I can see in the two or three days that the group stays at the spring, discussing what they know about this Mona woman and planning their next move to get away from there, that Craz might see Vel and Sleo together at times, or probably see Vel undressing or bathing... Probably, while foraging for food he decides to talk to her about that kisss and it turns into something unfavorable to Vel. Next thing Craz knows, he's on his back with Sleo's fist pounding into his face.
IDK, something ends up breaking them apart. If Grut is a follower, then who does he follow at this time - Craz, who's running away; or Sleo, who's staying with his woman? Nevertheless, it breaks down the group, which gives Mona just what she needs to get Suri.
And, perhaps, Craz and Grut (if he goes with him) might end up becoming part of the bad side of things (unknowingly) somehow, and return to the story at the worst possible time for the group... It might give Craz a chance to either redeem himself, or gain revenge and take what he wants - Vel.
IDK - more drama to mix in this hot mess...but, it really is rather tempting to end this portion of the story with a breakdown of friendship/brotherhood/loyalty before Suri is taken. Then it'll leave only Gar, Sleo, Vel (if she does stay with Sleo, or jumps with Suri - cloaked - to keep with her while staying mentally connected with Sleo to give them directions... Thought there!)
OOOooo, interesting if Vel does go with Suri to keep her as safe as she can without getting caught...and she so happens, after a few months pass, that she finds herself in a rather interesting situation - realizing that she's expecting! That will definitely cause her problems with - staying hidden - and will give Sleo an even bigger incentive for helping Gar find them both.
Okay... no more brainstorming today! That was a wild one. I thought of one thing - just one, and look what happened!!!
