Life is Like a Painting (Joshua x Teresa) [Non-Canon]

[Klutzy Ninja Kitty]

Sanae Hanekoma tells of a few events involving the Composer that take place over the span of several days while he works on his art.

[Note: The events in this fic are based on The World Ends With You mixed with lore from The Murder Series ( The Murder Series Wiki ) These events are non-canon fan fiction to the Murder Series.]

Contents
Part 1: Life Lesson
Part 2: Every now and again
Part 3: Distraction
Part 4: Beneath the Surface​

 

[Klutzy Ninja Kitty]

Life Lesson

I stood atop a ladder--which leaned against a building--a can of spray paint in my hand. I began to work my magic on the building, spray from the can glossing the wall with its radiance. It wasn't often people saw me as I painted in Shibuya, but more often so that people viewed my artwork after it was already done. There is at least one individual, however, who hangs around me enough to see the process.

At the bottom of my ladder stood the Composer, his judgmental eyes probably looking between myself and my work. "Don't you ever grow tired of doing that all the time?"

I laughed, finally peeking at him over my shoulder. "This is my passion, Josh. I'd never get tired of it. Besides, so much good comes from art! It even has a few life lessons in it if you look deep enough. Life is like a painting. Draw the lines with hope. Erase the errors with tolerance. Dip the brush with patience and color it with love. Heh, there's a life lesson for you and I won't even charge ya."

Joshua turned his gaze away, his expression forming a frown. "Well, I can tell you one thing, that isn't what my life is like. My life is more like... a painting nobody liked, so it was painted over to make it look better. However, just because it was repainted doesn't change the painting it used to be deep beneath the surface."

I raised an eyebrow. "What's that supposed to mean?" Somehow I had a feeling Joshua was degrading himself, but I didn't intend to press him too much to find out.

Joshua smirked. "I'm surprised you don't understand. Maybe I'll explain it to you someday," he told me, turning to walk away. "I thought you were an art expert."

"I-I am!" I called out, twisting around and nearly forgetting I was on a ladder. I wobbled and lost my footing for second, quickly turning around to grab the building and balance myself. By the time I had stabilized myself, Joshua was already walking away.

"I also thought that reapers and angels have wings," he added, "there's really no excuse for you to be using a ladder, or falling for that matter."

"Oh, quiet down ya know-it-all. It's tiresome to stay in one spot and flap my wings all day. It's easier to stand up here on a ladder," I retorted, watching him finally walk away. If there was one thing for certain, Joshua was a kid with a sharp tongue and a stubborn attitude. When he wanted to believe in something or say something daring, he very well could accomplish it.

Although he had walked away, apparently, Joshua was still in earshot of me. I could hear him speaking to someone, ignoring it mostly until I heard my very own words stolen from right out of my mouth.

"Well, you know what they say, Life is like a painting," Josh began, causing me to turn around on my ladder once again. As he quoted me word for word, one of my eyebrows began to twitch.

"Dammit, Josh, can't I have even a little bit of credit?" I grumbled to myself, "You say enough smartass shit as it is."

As I listened a bit longer, I realized it was actually Teresa who he was talking to. She immediately shot down his statement. "Where'd ya get that from? The back of a post card? Or did you steal that from Sanae?"

While Joshua stuttered and tried to defend himself I laughed. I had been saved by the Conductor's built in bullshit detector. Which, she probably didn't realize, was a great superpower to have when you worked around Joshua.
​

 

[Klutzy Ninja Kitty]

Every Now and Again

Days passed. I stood atop my ladder, the sound of the spray emerging from my can muffled by the arguing I heard in the streets below.

"This review is important! Will you stop being so difficult?!"

"This review is stupid. Face it, Josh, I can see right through your bullshit. The only reason we're doing another review today is because you procrastinated your ass off and didn't prepare me a new lesson for today!"

"Th-That... is not you seeing through my bullshit. That is you coming up with some bullshit so you have an excuse to bicker with me like you always do!"

I looked down at the squabbling Composer and Conductor, furrowing my brows. Despite the fact they were arguing, I was surprised about what I could hear coming from Joshua's voice. It was full of passion. It was rare if he ever got worked up about anything. For some reason, Teresa Agnes seemed to boil an unusual fire in him.

Although, it wasn't something I cared to think about in that moment. I wanted the two of them to shut up so I could focus!

Deciding to be sneaky, I glanced at a bucket of paint I had sitting on the roof near my work area. Deciding to sacrifice it, I knocked the bucket over, intending for the paint to land on either one or both of the squabbling individuals.

I didn't hit both, but my paint splashing all over Teresa was more than enough to shut them up, for a moment at least, until Joshua erupted with laughter.

"Hah! Thank you karma. That's what you get, Teresa."

"I wouldn't be laughing, wise guy," she replied, running her hand through the paint that coated her body and collecting a massive blob of it in her hand. Before the cocky Composer could utter another syllable he had a face full of paint. "How do you like it?"

I blinked a couple of times, my eyes widening as I focused on the event now with interest. Josh hated being dirty. Surely his reaction was going to be priceless! I could recall a few times, in fact, where he had punished reapers who got him dirty right on the spot.

His reaction, however, ended up not going as expected. He threw a fit, almost befitting of the fifteen-year-old appearance he liked to adorn.

"Ack, disgusting!" he cried. "Yuck, ew!" he added, clawing at his face. "It got in my mouth and everything. Dammit, Teresa! I didn't ask for this!"

Much like the Composer a minute earlier, Teresa was now erupting with laughter while Joshua stomped his feet. "Yes, you did!"

"Heh, she sure makes you act strange, Josh," I thought to myself, the thought further confirmed when Joshua reached into the goop on his face and flung it at Teresa.

"Wipe that smirk off your face. We're at war now!" he declared.

Failing to wipe the smirk off her lips the Conductor responded with, "Works for me. I can't wait to make you even more dirty than you already are."

And so, the two oddballs had a fight with the paint that seemed to go on for quite some time. In fact, even after I had packed up my things for the night and headed home they were still going at it. I didn't understand it, but at least Josh seemed to be having fun. Which, believe it or not, was something he deserved to have every now and again.
​

 

[Klutzy Ninja Kitty]

Distraction

One afternoon I worked on one of my paintings until the sun began to set. Knowing my light for the day would soon be gone, I intended to make my way for home until I heard the usual blabbering of Joshua and Teresa nearby. While it was usually below me, today I could hear it above me. In fact, it came from the roof of the very building I was painting.

I stood a bit taller on my ladder and peered up on the roof, seeing that the two had just landed from a flight.

"We can take a break for now. Good job today, by the way, you actually went through most of the training without complaining for a change."

Teresa huffed. "I don't complain. I just point out the flaws in your teaching." She glanced around. "Anyhow, why are we taking a break on top of a roof?"

The Composer shrugged. "Nice view of the sunset?"

I chuckled quietly to myself. I'd have to remember to tease him about this later. In my opinion, it looked like quite the romantic setup. Now, I could've been reading into things too much, but I highly doubted it.

"If you say so," she remarked, taking a seat on the edge of the roof, allowing her feet to dangle off the ends.

Without another word, Joshua moved to join her, only to do something I didn't expect from him. He tripped over his feet and nearly fell off the roof. Now, Joshua was known for many things, being a prissy little prick is the most prominent trait people might point out about him, but never had he been known as a klutz. He was an intelligent, calculating individual who most certainly always watched where he was going.

Alarmed, Teresa jumped up and immediately grabbed his arm in order to yank him back up on the roof. When she did so, Joshua toppled over on his side. After the quick event took place, Teresa stared at him in bewilderment.

"What was that?! You complain about my footwork when we're training and yet you can't even walk on a roof without falling off? From now on, I'm going to remind you of this moment whenever you complain about me messing up."

"I'm alright, thanks for asking," he snapped back, quickly sitting up to brush himself off. "My foot got caught on one of the shingles. I guess one of them is loose. Anyhow, you don't have to tell me twice. I'm sure you'll remind me about this for the rest of eternity."

Afterwards, the two sat back on the edge of the roof and quietly began to speak to one another. At that point, I finally moved down my ladder and prepared to head home, a smirk on my face.

"You may have her fooled, Josh, but you don't have me fooled," I privately mused.

The shingles on top of that roof were fine. I had been on that roof at least a hundred times myself so I would know. The problem wasn't with the shingles, but with the Joshua himself. His gentle, blue-gray eyes had been so fixed on Teresa that, in truth, for a split second he failed to even notice where he was walking and had tripped over his own feet. She must've been quite the distraction for him to lose his usual steady balance.
​

 

[Klutzy Ninja Kitty]

Beneath the Surface

"Damn," I cursed, lifting my hand to feel the first drops of a beginning rainstorm pat against my palm. I had been outside working on a piece of art until mid-afternoon, but now I would have to stop and pray the rain wouldn't be enough to wash away my work.

I descended down the ladder and gathered up some of my supplies, surprised at how the rain instantly began to downpour. I leaned up against the building I had been working on and hid myself in its doorway for a moment, waiting for the rain to calm down. When it finally did, I stepped out preparing to head home.

Before I moved an inch, however, I caught the sight of someone on top of the roof. After a moment of watching, I realized it was Joshua—soaked from head to toe thanks to the rain—sitting on the edge of the roof. When I looked at him a bad feeling stirred in me, as if something was wrong with him. I sat down my things and called out to him.

"Uh, Josh, what are you doing up there?"

"..."

When no response came I spread my wings and flew up to him, giving up on keeping myself from the rain. I watched him for a second, taking in the details of his blue-grey eyes—which seemed as stormy and dark as the rainy sky above. I gave the back of his head a shove in attempt to catch his attention, causing him to blink and pick his head back up as if waking from a dream. He wiped a few locks of his wet-down hair out of his eyes and shivered, wrapping his arms around himself.

"What are you doing out here, Josh?" I began, starting with the question I had asked him before. "You're soaked to the bone. I know you can't exactly catch a cold, but still you're making yourself uncomfortable out here for no reason." I placed a hand on the back of his shoulder blades to show my concern only for Josh to flinch and pull away from me. He took a few steps to the side, making a larger gap between us.

"..."

The Composer still refuse to spoke, leaving a more than chilling silence between us. It was a silence I had experienced more than a few times before in dealing with him. It always meant he was unhappy. The last time I could recall it happening was when we stood at a distance and watched Neku with his friends after the original Reapers' Game they had been revived from. Neku had invited Joshua to join them, and I encouraged him, but he simply watched sadly from a distance, said nothing, and left. Sometimes, getting that boy to explain his feelings was like pulling teeth.

"Talk to me, Josh, I know something ain't right with ya. Just tell me what's going on already. I won't leave until you do," I told him.

"Then I guess you'll be standing out in the rain all day," Josh offered me, replying almost instantly in a soft spoken, beaten voice. "Go home, Sanae," he added, his voice struggling to give me a stern command.

I stepped closer to him. "Uh, well," I began, unsure what else to say. What really could I say? When Joshua wanted to be stubborn about something it was difficult to break him. But, maybe if I was lucky, I could guess what was wrong and figure something out myself...

"Have you taken a trip to the Real Ground and seen Phones in a while?"

"..."

Silence. So his mood didn't have anything to do with Neku, that much was certain. But what else could I ask him about that might get a reaction out of him?

"So what's Teresa up to today? If she were here right now she'd be scolding your ass for standing out here in the rain."

Joshua shifted, no, flinched!

Ah, a reaction at last!

I smirked, beginning to pull my cell phone from my pocket. "Heh, maybe I'll call her and be a tattle tail. As soon as I do I bet she'll come up here and--"

"No, don't."

Suddenly, Joshua had whirled around to face me, cupping his hand over my phone. "She's busy."

I cocked an eyebrow. "Is that so? Well, maybe I'll just have to ask her for myself."

The Composer tightened his grip around my phone. "I'm serious. She's busy."

Since he was talking to me now, I decided to go ahead and push for more information. "Busy with what, exactly?"

He hesitated before replying, "She's... hanging out with a friend."

I quieted thoughtfully. There had to be more to it than that.

"A friend?"

"Well," Joshua began, still rather hesitant, "a guy friend; Will."

"Oh, wait, so she's on a date?" I asked, slipping my phone back into my pocket.

When Joshua nodded in confirmation I would've let out a cry of victory for figuring it out if only he didn't look so glum. It was written all over his face that he was more than unhappy with the idea of Teresa being on a date. Even if he couldn't yet comprehend his own feelings for Teresa, I could certainly see them. I had already seen more than enough proof.

"Huh, well, I wonder how the date is going then? I bet she's bored out of her mind. She doesn't seem like she'd be the type of girl who'd be interested in going on some random date," I told him, secretly trying to ease his thoughts. "Hell, I bet when it's over she won't even want to do it again."

Joshua ran a hand through his soaked locks and offered a sigh. "Oh, It'd say it's actually going pretty well. He kissed her a little while ago."

My eyes widened. "Wait, she wouldn't tell you that. You were watching them?"

He averted his gaze. "Oh, for a little while." He shrugged. "But it's not a big deal." Halfheartedly he added, "Good for them."

I furrowed my brows. "Maybe, but what about for you?"

His voice still soft, Joshua replied, "What do they have to do with me?"

I leered at him. "You know very well what I mean. It bothers you."

He chuckled, pretending to seem uncaring. "You're being ridiculous, Sanae. Anyhow, I'm going to take a walk," he told me, brushing off my words. He started to walk away from me, but was stopped when I reached out and grabbed his shoulder.

"Oh no, you're not avoiding my so easily. It's written all over your face that the idea of Teresa being on a date with him bothers you. It's okay for you to admit it, ya know."

"..."

Silence. The only sound I could hear was the sound of my own breathing and the echoing of rain against the roof of the building.

Oh great, he's shutting down on me again.

"C'mon, don't go quiet on me again. Talk to me, Josh. You've told me before that you trust me more than anyone. Share your feelings with me for once."

"..."

I gripped his shoulder. "Don't give me the silent treatment! Dammit, Josh, I know you care about her. Don't brush me off and act like you don't. I've seen the way you look at her and how happy you are when you hang around her. I've seen you let your guard down around her enough to just laugh and be yourself. Hell, I know you even make excuses just to spend more time around her even when you don't have to. And I... like that. You deserve to be happy, even if you don't believe so. You shouldn't just ignore the way you feel and let her go. Heck, I'm sure it's not even too late. You just gotta be honest with yourself. So please, just talk to me and--"

Joshua whipped around suddenly, a fiery anger in his eyes showing that I hadn't expected to see so suddenly. "SHUT THE HELL UP, SANAE!" he snarled, backhanding me across the face.

He stepped back, holding his arms up. "What do you want me to do? What do you want me to say? You want me to admit I care about Teresa? I care about her. She's... beautiful, and not just on the outside. Are you happy now?"

Breaking up Joshua's words, a crash of thunder sounded in the background. It was almost as if he had willed the noise into existence with his own frustration.

"A-Are you happy now?" he repeated.

"Uh," I mumbled, touching my cheek where Joshua had hit me. I was not only surprised by his slap, but by his words as well.

"You're right; I make up excuses to keep her around." He chuckled sadly. "Between you and me, she's been finished with her training for quite some time now. It is just an excuse to make her hang around me, as you suspected."

He lowered his head, speaking in barely a whisper. I could hardly hear his voice over the sound of the rain. "It's not like she'd want to hang around me for anything other than work, so really it's my only option. If I told her she was done, she'd be thrilled and only deal with me when she had to from that moment on."

Jeez, talk about no confidence.

"Josh--"

"But you're right," Josh began, his voice returning to normal. "I care about her. I like talking to her, hanging around her, and... I'll admit I even like arguing with her."

Yeah, that last one was more than blatantly obvious to even a blind, mentally disturbed she-wolf.

He threw his hands up again, starting to sound angry once more. "But it doesn't matter. My feelings don't matter. She likes that... that guy. And you know what? That's good." He squeezed his eyes shut, contorting his expression. "When he kissed her, I made myself watch it. It was... painfully difficult, but... I needed to do it so the pain would wake me up and..."

Furrowing his brows he added, "...make me realize that I'm the Composer and this isn't a fairytale. I'm the most powerful man in Shibuya and I have a job to do. I don't get a happy ending. Happiness is weakness, and any of my enemies will take my happiness and destroy it. Or the happiness will prove to be false and destroy me from the inside out."

I scowled at his words. "You're just making up excuses!"

"Logical reasoning is not an excuse, or did you forget what I did to the previous Composer? I became her happiness, her weakness, and I destroyed her."

"..."

"I'll take your failure to respond as understanding. Good. Happiness is only temporary. In the end, Teresa will either betray me like John did, she'll leave, or someone will kill her to get to me. I don't want that in my life..."

Before I couldn't get him to say a word, and now he won't shut up. And the things he's saying are just... so sad.

Joshua glanced down at his hands, narrowing his eyes. "And if what I just said wasn't already reason enough, I can give you one more. Look at me," he commanded, jabbing a thumb in his own direction. "Who in their right mind would actually... want to care for someone like me?"

In a somber, dismal tone he stated, "Remember when you told me that life is like a painting? And I told you my life is more like a painting nobody liked, that was painted over to improve it? Well, the improvement--the Composer--may be apparent, but the part nobody liked--me--still exists beneath the surface."

He shrugged. "I don't even care much for me--this morally corrupt monster I am--so how can I expect Teresa to? She can't stand me anyhow. She's better off with him. Other than the fact that she deserves to be happy, I can think of so many other reasons why it's good for her to stay away from me."

"Oh, Joshua--"

"Look, Sanae, I'm done talking. I think I've said more than enough. So I'm going home. Don't try to follow me, tell anyone about this, or even try to come into my room later. I just want to be left alone."

Before I could utter another word, he leapt off the building and landed onto the ground--a jump that would've killed any ordinary human.

Dammit, Joshua, you do too deserve to be happy. And you most certainly aren't a monster. Just because you've made a few bad decisions doesn't make you morally corrupt, especially not when you regret those bad decisions.

I watched him fade into the darkness, still in shock and awe at the things he said.​