Lies your parents told you

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October Knight

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Fantasy, Horror and Sci-fi. I'll try basically anything though. I also love strange and unusual RP genre concepts. Different is good!
Lies your parents told you!

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I recently watched an episode of South Park where the boys parents told them to spend the night at a kids house that had chicken pox
. They did this so the boys would contract the virus. This got me thinking about the things our parents/guardians do during our upbringing to keep us safe. Lies they tell us to ensure we do the right thing or to spare us hardship and sadness. Another common one that I always thought was funny was the old "Your doggy is going to live on a farm and and have lots of doggy friends to play with" When really he is going to get put to sleep.


What lies did/do your parents tell you?

 
One notable incident always stands out to me when people talk about their parents lying to them. When I was a kid, I never really realized the whole "one parent" situation was odd (my best friend of the time, my cousin, was also raised by only her mother). That is, until I went to preschool and noticed that everyone had a daddy there and all the kids were talking about their fathers and almost all of them seemed to have a dad. Distraught, I asked my mother about my father.

"I sold him to a band of traveling gypsies for a quarter."

I believed her until I was, like, eight. -__-
 
Once upon a time my mom was making dinner.

I asked, "What's that?"

She said, "Roast Beef."

I thought she said roast BEAST so I asked, "What kind of beast is it?"

She laughed and said "Wolf."

So forever I thought she was cooking up Roast Beast and the meat was wolfmeat. D:
 
"I never did drugs.". Hard to believe since everyone my mom associated with when I was young did or were still doing drugs. She then changed the story a few years later to "I tried pot like twice and I had a hard time breathing. I think I'm alleric and you'll likely be also!". If shed just been up front and said "I tried it a few times and didn't like it, and besides I was suffering from anorexia and didn't want anything that could possibly make me hungrier." I wouldn't find here a hypocrit about drug use to this day. I'm guessing she never did anything harder, but I'll never know and I no longer care.
 
:/ My parents have told me so many lies.

The ones that enrage me the most are the following:

The day my Mum lied about my kitten. She took Snickerdoodle to get spayed and for over a month, she never went back for her. Sometime later, Mother finally told me she had my kitten put down, not spayed. That hurt me in so many ways. She not only lied about WHY she took my beloved feline away, but kept lying about why my poor baby wasn't home for so long. I still can't forgive this... She did it all because she just didn't want my cat around.

The other was told by, yet again, my Mother. She promised to never do drugs in order to be a good influence to us chilren. I promised the same. That pact was broken when she went off to smoke weed with a friend. I've been disappointed in her ever since. I kind of want to do some weed just to spite her...
 
You want the God honest truth? My entire childhood.

Not saying my dad is a CIA agent or anything, but from I never took drugs to son, you got some weed? I could use a hit, to my mother's two faced drinking lifestyle. It never ended. Found out both my brother and my father slept with a woman I was forced to call aunt.










I need a beer.
 
My mother didn't like me eating Mr. Noodles uncooked/dry, so she told me that if I ate them that way I would get worms.... I still ate them anyways.
 
My mother used to promise she'd take me to a local water park or Disney world if I did well on this or that and then just never did. She laughs about it now. Ha. Ha. :|

She also used to wake me up for school about an hour earlier than I needed to be by opening my door and yelling "Wake up, you're already late. It's (insert time that is entirely incorrect) already!"

A slew of "do as I say, not as I do" things.

Most of this stuff no longer flies, of course. She tries to lie to me now and I grill her about it until she finally admits the truth. I hate that I have to do that to her, but hell, I hate being lied to.
 
"Kids in Somalia starve if you don't finish your dinner."

Guess what? They still starve if I don't finish my dinner!

Though I made myself feel better by doing some pro dono work in the Phillippines backwaters on a medical mission a few years ago. A bunch still starved when I didn't finish my sandwich.