Leading people on, I hate it.

Discussion in 'THREAD ARCHIVES' started by ShadowFiend, Jul 9, 2011.

  1. So this girl at my work flirts with me all the time and stuff, and it was apparent she liked me. So I asked her out a week ago to hang out tomorrow morning, and she said yes, happily. Tonight I told her I hope she has a good day at work and I'll see her in the morning in a text. No reply. Lately she's been more stand offish of me ever since she said yes to tomorrow, I could just tell something wasn't right with her at work. And now that I finally text her, she doesn't reply and completely black balls me. And the worst part is, I'll be seeing her again on monday and then I'll have to deal with the awkwardness of that day and all the rest of them. I just don't understand why every good thing that comes to me just ends in disaster. I dunno what it is about me that screams pawn, but it happens too frequently. Any suggestions on how to carry on with this?
  2. Maybe a family emergency came up. Maybe she just couldn't say no for fear of hurting your feelings. If anything confront her about it so she can't wussy out of the situation anf think lying is ok.
  3. Er, confronting her about it might not be the best idea. For whatever reason she has, this girl is not interested in another outing, right now. Continuing to pursue a woman after she has made clear her desire for distance is a tricky business, and often ends in disaster. Since the two of you don't seem to be particularly close, the best thing to do would be to gracefully withdraw. If you do that, no one leaves the situation with a sour taste in their mouths. This allows future avenues for communication to remain open-- she might call you back later if she wants to give it another shot. If not, it's no big deal. There are plenty of other fish and you have just saved yourself from Work Place Drama.

    Us single ladies gotta play it cool, Fiend. *Dons her sunglasses*
  4. My plan of action is to just act like nothing happened and pretend that she didn't leave me in the dust and treat her the same at work like any other work day as usual. Sometimes the best solution is to just forget things.
  5. You gotta play it cool, son.

    Don't let it bother you. Actually, don't let it bother you. Like seriously, it shouldn't. So whatever happened, happened. Big whoop! Not like you can't find another woman out there. I mean, 51% of the population of the world are women, right?

    Don't pretend nothing happened, or rather, don'tgo out of your way to make sure that happens. Rather, act normal. Act like you always did around her, and if she gives you the cold shoulder, then that's her problem, not yours. Don't hound her about what happened, why it happened, etc.. If she wants to tell you, she'll tell you.

    Again, don't let this bother you. Just be cool, man. I can't stress that enough.
  6. I think your plan of action sounds good, Shadow.

    Be cool as a cucumber, dude! Act like nothing happened, didn't phase you in the least! Cause that shows confidence and confidence is key!
  7. Just a quick update, she texted me back at 2 am last night saying the reason why she couldnt was because her friend from sweden was over, which I thought was an excuse, but in reply I said, "ok maybe another time?" Then she sends me another text and asks me to call her so she can explain further. I call her, she doesnt answer. She calls me back at times she knows im working and I cant answer. I call her when I get home, she doesnt answer :p

    EDIT: We talked and it turns out she's just a busy person. Still not quite sure if her friend really visited her, but she was honest about not having time for anything really including hanging out cause of two jobs and her therapy classes, so whatever I guess?
  8. Hate to say this but if she really wanted to talk she'd make the time to call when you're not bust as she knows you schedule. Right now you're dancing around each other delaying the awkward talk. Listen to Seiji.