EXERCISE Koori Challenge 1: Come at this if you can

Discussion in 'DEVELOPING CHARACTERS & CULTURES' started by Kooriryu, Sep 12, 2013.

  1. [​IMG]
    Here we have a seemingly simple character challenge. Except you're not writing a backstory for this image, you're going to write what's going to happen in the next 10 minutes because someone's gonna be looking for that. Think you can do it?

    HARDMODE: No referencing high fantasy or magic.
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  2. Marissa laid there, covered in a plastic sheet, exposed for all the world to see. Panic gripped her. I'm running out of air. She struggled to control her breathing, taking long, shallow breaths. I'm supposed to be dead. Can't let them know that I'm not dead. She could feel her heart pounding in her chest, trying to escape. Eyes closed, she tried to get a sense of her surroundings.

    The ground underneath her felt soft. Good. Focus on how comfortable the ground feels, let your mind relax. It'll all be over soon.

    Loud voices pierced the silence around her. She couldn't quite hear what they were saying, but from the sound of it, people were arguing. And they were coming closer. Trying to still her breathing, Marissa focused on keeping still. They think you're dead. Don't give it away. Don't let them see you move. The voices died down as they neared her. She could feel their presence looming over her. Dread filled every ounce of her being, and she opened her eyes. One of them was staring directly in to her eyes. The overwhelming urge to get up and run filled Marissa; the end was here, and she was powerless.

    A gunshot echoed, and all the light disappeared from the world.

    Raucous applause filled the theatre. The lights came back on, and Marissa was standing in the middle of all the actors. A spotlight shone on her, the star of the show. She breathed a sigh of relief, her claustrophobia from moments ago a distant memory.
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  3. Thump thump, Thump thump
    Her heartbeat was racing, pounding in her chest, had she been wearing a watch Cleo was sure she would have also heard the corresponding tick, tick, tick, tick, that indicated time was running out.
    And time was running out.

    She felt as if her body was frozen, and in a sense it was. There was nothing she could really do to improve the situation, just wait.

    Rustle, crash, snap.
    She could hear them searching the woods, talking on their radios, pushing aside branches, searching through the dead leaves. She could see the beams of their flashlights as they landscaped the area searching.

    Please, oh please let them be in time! Her mind screamed, even as she outwardly remained silent. Let them find her, let them find her.

    Step, step, step, step
    Some one was approaching her now.
    “Mrs. Hendricks,” a calm but strained male voice addressed her, “I’m sorry, it’s too late.” Cleo snapped her head around to look at him, the chief of police, his salt and pepper mustache trembling as he frowned. “They found her half a mile east of here in the middle of the trees . . . she was,” he paused and swallowed, “your daughter, she was covered in a plastic sheet . . . I’m sorry, there’s nothing more we can do.”

    “Nnnnnnnaaaaaaaaaaaaahhhhh!” the scream ripped from her lips as Cleo Hendricks, mayor of Newcastle Falls, fell to her knees swearing that the responsible party would pay.
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  4. She had been running for most of the night, the veil piece from her grandmother's bridal dress the only thing protecting her from the morning chill. For a computerized weather system and an upperclass that had taken comfort to extremes she had to wonder why even have chilly mornings at all. Her tipoff had said the hidden hole in the 9 foot thick alloyed wall was right at the upperleft corner of the ROS Industrial Artifact Park. She banged on it for most of the night going along its side, desperate to hear that hollow thud.


    She sat up, naked as the moment she tore the rest of the ruined wedding dress when she ran into the park, harangued by relatives from both sides and the security personnel each had hired for her 'special day'. The panicked moment when she realized that A) She didn't love Humbert, B) She didn't want to be conscripted to the life marrying him would've bound her to C) She didn't want to live in the Upper Ring, suffocating on decadence led her up to this moment: Naked, dirtied with absolutely no options. A lifetime of highclass living wrestled with her inner monologue all at once terrified, indignant, despairing and stubborn. The media never even brushed on topics outside the Upper Ring, for all she knew what was 9 feet away was desolated wasteland with mutated beasts ready to suck the flesh off her bones.

    She stood up, wrapping the antique veil around her out of sheer habit than any actual warmth it could have provided. "Better than humdrum with Humbert!" she told herself lamely, graduate studies in Journalism & Creative Writing were out to lunch in her own head... probably because her own situation was one her professors lectured against in warning of boring your audience. She paced in a circle, losing herself in frantic thought and the oddly cushy feeling of the peat soil squelching between her toes.

    "... OW! Sonofabi--!" her second toe had caught in something and it felt like the toe was going to be ripped right off the end of her foot. She fell to one knee before adjusting herself to unhook her mangled toe. The offending protuberance was most definitely not one of those rare specimens ROS Industrial Park was fond of planting just to boast about them. She rolled over onto her rear, massaging her toe. In the face of past events she kicked at it with her other foot.


    "..." A very, very small voice in the back of her head said in caustic tone, I swear if that's where it's been all this time... She kicked at it a few more times.

    thud ...thud... thudthudthudthudthudthud THUD!

    "Ha... hahahahaHAHAHAHAHAHAHA! HAH!" Moving to her knees she began to hurriedly dig around the metal bit that was sticking out, eventually she had dug out an opening to a tunnel that seemed to have been sitting quietly underneath her.

    Snap! Her head whipped around, she kept her eyes off in the distance where she heard it. Slowly, cat-like even she slipped herself into the tunnel crouching in it before thinking to sprinkle the peat soil onto the cover and sliding it back over on top of herself. She crawled in complete darkness for what seemed like hours. The thought she devised for herself, that absolutely anything and everything would be better than what she was crawling away from kept her soldiering on. She stopped a few times to rest, to goad herself, to convince herself, to assure herself that she was doing the right thing. It felt like a day had passed when she saw a soft light in the distance ahead. She was nearly galloping on all fours to the light, tumbling out of the hole a jumble of limbs and delicate lace. She heard and felt people around her probably wondering where she came from. She stayed still, frozen, the shock of actually escaping the Upper Ring and being acutely aware of her nudity starting to weigh on her. Someone was kneeling over her and the weight of more substantive fabric blanketed her more vulnerable bits. Before she could bring herself to open her eyes, her ears were the first to sense this new world.

    "Hey... shh, it's fine. You've been crawling in there awhile, haven't you?" The voice was melodic, the type of voice people meant when they used mellifluous to describe an orator. It was warm, hearty and comforting. Opening her eyes little by little, taking in the bright lights she could see through the thin flesh of her eyelids. What she saw was a horribly twisted face, a hellish configuration that was just barely recognizable as human.

    "Welcome to Hell."


    "Jano, take that mask off! One of these days, you're going to give someone a heart attack with that schtick of yours!" A loud sound similar to an axe smartly biting into a treetrunk was heard shortly after that.
    #4 Kooriryu, Sep 15, 2013
    Last edited: Sep 16, 2013
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  5. Cold. Damp. Soft. A flawless cheek pressed against the forest soil. The sensation was strange. Unfamiliar. Her fingers curled in to the dirt, eyes fluttering open in vague confusion. A clump of brown material lift in the air and slowly sift through her fingers. Her body moved in a lithe, controlled, almost unearthly smooth motion as she sat up. The veil pinned in her hair moved with her. Lace and silk leaving a soft caress against her skin. Once on her feet, the show of perfect wavered. Her knees wobbled. The first step she took had her balance teetering. Even her hands shook. No, her whole body was shivering. Exposed to the chill midnight wind.

    Bright light. Blinding. She turned her head away, raising a hand to shield her eyes.

    "There she is. In one piece, too. Bring the crate."

    "I can't find the Khloe model. We're gonna get our asses handed to u-"

    "Relax, they've insurance for shit like this. We'll just report it stolen."

    She didn't understand the words, not really. But she was conditioned. The box was hers and she belonged in it. Despite lingering stares, she accepted the hand that helped her step back in to the box. Lying back without a word while the branded lid was closed over her.

    Genetic Bride Alese Model 021

    There was the cold again. Ice prickling, stinging. Now she remembered. She hated the cold. Yet it never lasted for long. Her eyes fell closed to the sound of high pitched beeping and the gentle sway of the crate being moved.


    SUCK IT.

    #5 Diana, Sep 15, 2013
    Last edited: Sep 16, 2013
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