So, I've done it. I've finally let go of whatever makes me care about humanity. I've finally decided not to give a two-bit damn about life any more. Because you know what? To hell with it. The good outweighs the bad to the point where it just doesn't seem to matter what happens. Whenever I try to do something to fix my life, it falls flat on its face. Have higher powers deal with bullies? They've got more friends than I care to count, who will hunt me down, and beat my spotty face in. My rapidly-falling grades? I'm at my limit. I revise as much as I can, I do what I can in lessons, but my brain just doesn't want to know. I'm in the top sets for all my subjects, but let's see how long that lasts when people find out I'm unable to actually cope with any of the pressure heaped into me. You all expect too much of me, and you all do a crap job of hiding your disappointment in me when I screw up. Smile? SMILE? Why the bloody hell would I smile, when I haven't smiled out of anything more than politeness in years? Stop pestering me, I look like bloody wackjob when I even smirk, it's only natural I scowl as much as possible. Not to mention my sleeping problems... No, I will not see someone about them. I have my reasons. I don't want your advice, and I don't want your sympathy. I'm an angsty teenager, and besides, I can solve these kind of problems on my own, I don't need people looking down on me with their patronising smiles and tones. I'm going to live life with no inhibitions or common sense any more - I don't see why it matters. Nobody particularly needs me, and I don't see the difference one regular, hate-filled person with no influence can make if they just disappeared. I take history, I know the difference one person can make, but they all had talents or situations that enabled them to do something big. All I have going for me is an inability to really care what happens in the world, or to me. Yes, I must sound extremely whiny, inconsiderate, and just a prat in general. But I just felt like shouting, and I couldn't bottle these things up any longer. I would've snapped, had I suppressed this for much longer, and this seemed to be the most immediate solution.