Bob nodded his solemn greetings as he entered the room. He was a polite gentleman, who always tipped his hat to the ladies. Both hats. The one he wore on his head. And the one one wore to cover his abnormally large ass. The was were he'd gotten his nickname and he took it in good humour. Bob had always had trouble finding trousers that fully covered his large ass, and knowing how very impolite it was to leave part of an ass uncovered, he had come up with the very brilliant idea of the ass hat. You may laugh, children, but it was a very wise invention on his part indeed. Once, the asshat had even saved someones life. Sit back, children, and let me tell you a story about Bob and his asshat.