"If there was to be no blame, and if there was to be no praise, who would you be then?"

[Hecatoncheires]

"Ask yourself, if there was to be no blame, and if there was to be no praise, who would I be then?"
- Quentin Crisp​

I came across the above line in 'How To Be Miserable' (don't look at me like that, it's a book about highlighting the ways in which people make themselves unhappy in order to avoid them), and it's one of those quotes that left me thinking on it a long time after the book had moved on to other matters. So much about the way we look and act is tied to our experiences and the expectations life has placed upon us, and I've found myself wondering just what sort of person I would be without such pressures.

So I'll pose the question to you motherfuckers.

Who would you be, how would you look and act, if there was to be neither blame nor praise?

 

[Elle Joyner]

It'd be interesting, for sure. Part of me hates the idea because praise and criticism are a lot of what mold people into who they are, but it would also force a lot of people to exist on their own merits and trust their own success or learn from their failures without having them pointed out. Curious

I can't honestly say who I'd be... But I would hope it was at least similar to who I am now XD

...more important question. How disappointed were you that it wasn't a "How to" guide on being miserable???

 

[Hecatoncheires]

...more important question. How disappointed were you that it wasn't a "How to" guide on being miserable???

I'm in the process of suing the publisher for false advertising.

 

[Greenie]

That's a tough one, to be honest.

I do believe I'd be less of a doormat and more confident in my decisions. And I probably wouldn't be as shy as I am now.

I do think I'd still be introverted.

Probably like myself honestly, but a much more cynical and snarky version.

 

[Quiet One]

I already treat the world like that. I expect no praise for anything I do, and have gotten pretty good at avoiding blame for my missteps.

...Yay?

 

[Dipper]

Don't think there'd be much change. Blame is something I can deal with but wouldn't miss, while praise is something I thrive on. That's probably the biggest difference: what's the point of putting in extra effort if no one cares?

 

[An Otaku]

I self-inhibit a lot of things and thoughts out of fear, and I guess that's related to fear of being blamed as... a bad person, I suppose. So if blame didn't exist, I'd probably feel much more comfortable being me and never care about perceived or actual perceptions of others. Which would likely lead to rash decisions, as well... But I think I'd enjoy being super quirky and not feel like people want to hurt me!

Without praise? Heh, I don't think anything would change for me personally. If I can ever get myself to actually commit to something, it's always because I want to do a worthwhile job. I can't think of too many instances where I do something out of a desire to be praised, and people don't really praise me..... er. Well. It's rare, anyway.

On the other hand, if I couldn't praise 'others' I... I don't know what I'd do. That's actually a scary thought, for some reason.

 

[Shiri]

I would be a different person, for sure. I imagine I would never focus on a certain career field for very long. Appearance-wise I would probably have cut my hair for practicality. On that note I think I would be an overall more practical person.

 

[Kagayours]

I think I'd be a much happier and more carefree person. Criticism from certain specific people in my life during my formative years has really done a lot to cripple my self-confidence, and I feel like my life ever since then has been mainly a struggle to live up to other people's standards, and getting upset with myself when I fail to meet those standards. :/

I have a lot of nostalgia for earlier points in my life when I just... didn't care so much. When I was happy and confident with who I was. When it wasn't such a struggle just to convince myself that I'm not a hopeless piece of garbage.

I would love to always be like that.

 

[IntrusivePenDesperateSword]

... No one's worrying about how the rest of the world would probably self-destruct? I mean come on, no blame = no consequence. Crimes flourish. No flatter = no reason to do anything about it for most people.

Not to mention these two things are huge parts of the basis of interaction. Take that away somehow, and the world you're left with isn't all that fun.

 

[Tempest]

. . . Oh god, sex would be horrible D:<