so i dont know if any of you have noticed i have not been on for about a week or so and thats because ((as someone told me just last night)) im throwing myself a fucking pity party but well i cant help it. you see my soul sister ((not a real sister but we considered ourselves sisters and even had our mothers calling us sisters and such)) well she was hit by a drunk driver and killed and well i am crushed because not only was it hard to deal with but the last time we saw each other we faught and like not a hour before she got in the car she called me and left me a message about how she loved me and that i should call her. i just am kinda feeling that if i was to pick up we would have talked like we normally do and i would have kept her from getting in the car. Im sorry everyone but i might not be on for the next week ((at least till monday if even then)) im sorry everyone i love you all i mean i fucking hate some of you because i like hate how awesome you are but i just cant deal with people right now. that and the fact that mother nature is a fucking bitch and making me even more emotional and in pain. Right now im what you might call a shell because i feel pretty dead inside and i just want the world to go away for awhile so please forgive me leaving for awhile.