How to disarm a situation?

Discussion in 'THREAD ARCHIVES' started by Minerva, Feb 2, 2016.

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  1. So, I'm in a bad place.

    My Geology Teacher is horrible, I didn't get two assignments in on time, they were apparently worth more than she told us they would be, and so now I'm failing. Like, badly.

    Midterms come tomorrow. The issue with this is, I have my perfectionist parents who want at least a B on everything. They get ultra, uber, ultimate angry if I even get a C.

    My question is how to defuse the situation, so that I can negotiate and talk. They say I have 'The easiest setup in existence' but they don't know how truly terrible my Geology teacher is. Everyone but them seems to know.

    So, how do I talk with them about why I failed, without getting in trouble.
  2. Well... To be honest, just... Try and explain your point as best as you can, and well... Factor in how the Geology Teacher may percieve what you say... In other words; choose your words carefully... I guess no teacher can really fault you for trying to improve your grade, which, you can try requesting for makeu-up work (though, well, not sure about your teacher's record with that sorta thing).
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  3. Wait, are you trying to talk to your teacher or your parents? I had assumed parents but then York's post made me think I misread something...

    Assuming you meant your parents: I would just try to be honest. :/ Tell them that you missed two assignments that were worth more than the teacher said that they were. Of course, I'd assume that they'd ask about why you missed two assignments in the first place, and, well... I guess you'll just have to own up to that one.

    Maybe if you're honest and up-front about missing the two assignments (that is, without trying to come up with an excuse about why you missed them), they'll appreciate your honesty and won't be as upset with you? I mean, I would definitely still mention the bit about your teacher not being clear about how much they were worth (maybe it would help if you could find something the teacher handed out earlier that said they were worth less?), but, yeah, being up-front about missing the assignments in the first place would at least prevent the whole thing from sounding like just a string of excuses.
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  4. Like the others have said, be honest, and tell them sooner than your grade becomes final, after all you know about the situation now and should not wait until afterward. But regarding perfectionist parents, they only want the best for you in the future, but they do not know your entire situation better than you know it, so worry not for meeting their standard but meeting your own standard under the situation that you were given :)
  5. As many know, I am harsh in my recommendations, so I apologize in advance.

    Here's my truthful, 100% honest, raw answer.

    Stop bitching and looking for a way to make your parents not mad at you for not doing your very best on two assignments. The best way to ease the situation is to step up and be responsible. Go to your Geology teacher and ask them if there is some extra credit you can do to raise your grade. Then when you tell your parents about it you can tell them that you know you fucked up but you have done everything possible to remedy the situation.

    Also, don't blame your Geology teacher. When you get out of school you are going to be faced with difficult people everyday. They may be your boss, a coworker, or maybe the bitchy lady at the DMV window who has no sympathy that you didn't pay your registration on time. You need to get used to difficult personalities. If anything, he is probably helping you to prepare for the real world.

    Whether or not he explained just how important these assigents are to your grade shouldn't matter. You should be turning in every assignment on time and to the best of your ability. Anything less than your best is an excuse and only hurting yourself.

    I probably sound like your parents, and that sucks lol. I remember being in high school and just wanting to have fun. Schoolwork was not my highest priority, but I wish it was. I wish somebody would have told me what I just told you. If they did I might have turned some stuff around.
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  6. Apologies for the bluntness, and I'm sure others have already alluded to this, but there is no way you're going to change your parent's minds. This is particularly true if you've already told them what you think the problem is and they responded without any hint of change.

    You screwed up, you'll be yelled at, life is gonna suck for a while. I had my share of this when I was in high school (I was a consistent D/C student though so you're already better off in that respect) and personal episodes. I recommend you to simply take stock of things and brace yourself if you don't believe you can fix it.

    If this happens to be a uncharacteristic thing for you, as in this is the only class that is giving you trouble and you don't have a history with struggling like this, perhaps pointing out the inconsistency to your parents will sway them into seeing that it's more than just you not putting enough effort into it. Keep in mind, if there is nothing they as parents can actually do to help you, they are less likely to take your side of things.
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