Hope for healing

As Jake heard the method for coming back to life he was a bit appalled.

"T-Take another's body...?" he blinked in suprise. "I-It dosn't seem right....I-I want to live again but..."

Would I be able to live with that...? He thought.

"And the memories...what if...I never regain my own...it will all have been for naught. And the family and lover of the person I'm to posess...what about them? How can I just, take the body?"

He moved a hand to cover his mouth. His thoughts were just spilling out of his mouth in streams of nonsensical blabber. Jake shook his head. This was all just not right but it was so appealing...to hold Kelsey again. To kiss her soft, warm lips.

"I'll do it I guess...but don't tell Kelsey...Once in the body I need to make myself believe I'm me before I convince her that the body and soul are me...."

With a sigh he followed Shayne to Kelsey's. Upon her opening the door she seemed annoyed and as was he a bit but her presance just had a way of soothing his soul in a way no one could discribe. They walked in and She sat at the couch. He sat next to her and sighed, smiling a bit, warmly. Then as she asked the question about thier date he leaned in, putting his lips against her next as much as was possible for a ghost.

"She was absolutly beautiful...like always...and yes, I had the time of my life. Nothing is ever boring with Kelsey around. She makes me...made me so happy...have her ask another question..."

He closed his eyes, taking in her sweet scent...oh how he missed his darling....darling Angel.
 
Kelsey bit her lower lip softly, remembering and feeling their last kiss. She missed him so much. If she could, she would bring him back. His smell has almost faded from his clothes. The apartment is lonely, and she gets scared at night. No one is there. It's just her. "ask another question," Shayne said, interrupting her thoughts. "Why did he do it? Why did he have to be the good guy?" Her eyebrows furrowed as tears threatened to fall. All she did was cry and she was tired of it, but if he didn't want to save everyone he would still be there, with her. She drew her knees up close to her and wrapped her arms around them. Her chin rested on the tops of her knees as she stared blankly at the couch cushion.

The emptiness was back. Her heart hurt and that was the only way she described it. The days were long without him. Kelsey forced those thoughts away and glanced over at the kitchen. She had another bottle of wine over there. After getting a glass of wine, she settled back on the couch. I think I drink too much, she thought to herself as she swirled the reddish liquid in the glass. "I kissed another guy," she confessed "I feel like I cheated on him." Kelsey's voice cracked softly "I went to a bar with Shae and she pressured me into talking to this guy then I just kissed him. It was gross." She let out a small laugh "Nothing like Jake." Glancing around the room, she hoped that maybe she would see Jake that maybe somehow she would know he was with her, know he loved her. "I just want him back."
 
If his heart could break it would...he knew by looking at her that she was thinking over thier last kiss. She just looked sad...and lonely. He knew the nights must have been scary and cold. No one there to hold...Jake knew exactly the feeling. For heaven sakes he couldn't sleep, the nights were long. Then she asked the question. Why did he have to be the hero...?

"Because...I wanted her to be impressed with me. That and I couldn't stand by and just let that happen. No one else was helping, plus how could I have known that he, the bank robber was so desperate to get away that he would kill anyone in his way? I"m sorry my angel..."

He really was sorry...he now wished that he had just minded his own business. Jake looked at her glass and frowned.

"Tell her, not to drink so much...it's onl going to hurt her body to drink so much."

Then he heard it...she kissed another guy. If his heart had still been beating it would have broken into tiny bits. He clenched his jaw; biting back the hurt he felt but it was clear in his eyes. He listened to her reasoning but still...it hurt just the same. Then all of a sudden he felt that she needed his reassurence. Jake placed his hand on hers and leaned forward kissing her on the lips for all that was ghostly possible. It wasn't really a kiss...to her it would just feel more like a chilly breeze.

"Tell her...it bothers me that she did that...kissed that guy but I understand. That I am dead now and She needs to be happy again...I just want to see her smile for all it's worth, to see her genuinly happy again...It kills me inside, even after My death to see her so unhappy...drinking her pain away. This isn't the Kelsey I know."

Jake looked over at Shayne.

"Tell her...that I am sitting right next to her...and that I can hear her but I can't comminucate without you..."
 
" I am... was.. always impressed with him. Everyday he said or did something impressive. Plus I was madly in love with him.. everything was impressive." She took a sip of wine, then quickly followed it with another. Kelsey was in mid sip when Shayne mentioned not drinking so much. With a slightly hesitation, she finally put the glass on the side table. She was willing to do anything for Jake, even if he was dead. Then the unmistakable cool breeze of his touch landed on her hand and lip. A smile played at her lips. "I love you," she murmured in the direction of the breeze, her eyes soft hoping that she was looking in the right direction.

This isn't the Kelsey he knows.... This isn't the Kelsey anyone knew, this wasn't the Kelsey she knew. Things change after a loved one in lost, sometimes in drastic ways. What she needed to do was be strong and continue to live. She decided to take a job as a kindergarten teacher. She had graduated high school early and went into college young, completing what needed to be done fast. Everyone seemed to be proud of her for being such a genius. Though she did make her mistakes. Doesn't everyone?

Shayne continued to tell her everything Jake said. He almost felt awkward doing it. It felt as if he was reading a diary or living for Jake. Never had he said such sweet loving things to anyone but Cassia, and that was a couple years ago. Soon he began to feel as if he needed to move on. It was time for him to find someone else. He wanted to find someone else, but that would wait until Jake was securely in another body or strictly in ghost form. Right now Shayne was going to do everything in his power for this precious woman in front of him, not to mention the fact he has started seeing Jake as a friend and not an annoying ghost.

Kelsey stifled a yawn. She didn't want Jake,or Shayne, to leave. Days had gone by where she had no company, and it was lonely. Loneliness is something a person can only handle for so long before it takes a toll on the mind. "Can you guys stay?" She asked softly. What she really wanted was Jake to stay, but if he just stayed then they couldn't talk. Shayne had to be there, he had to be Jake's voice. "I don't want to be alone tonight," Kelsey confessed.
 
It felt wonderful to hear her say that...She still loved him. Even though he was dead...it kind of felt wrong but it also felt so right. Shouldn't he be incouraging her to move forward? After all...Shayne didn't even know that getting him another body would work one hundred percent. He was stupid going into help like that...he should have just let things be. If he did He could still be with Kelsey. Jake smiled as she set down the wine glass. He continued to listen for a bit before saying anything.

"She is so intellegent...She graduated early from high school. I Need to know she isn't wasting those brains of hers..."

He put a hand on her arm. Jake could tell she was thinking somethings thorugh, as she should. Then she spoke up...she wanted them to stay. Immeditly Jake nodded.

"Yes...Anything for her. Sorry if that make it awkward for you Shayne but she needs this...I need this..."

Jake looked at the woman lovingly; he would do anything for her.
 
The night was amazing. Kelsey loved the fact that Jake was staying with her. Even if she couldn't properly see him or feel him. It was almost surreal. After a long night of laughing and some tears she feel asleep on the couch in the middle of a conversation. Shayne didn't want to just leave her there. He had to take her to her room. After a moment he quietly got up. He slipped his arms around her. She smelled so lovely. The feeling of having someone against him was unexplainable.. it had been so long. He noticed how soft her face was and the dusting of freckles over her nose. God, she was beautiful.

Shayne gently laid Kelsey down and covered her. "Jake," he whispered "you are going to get a new body. You have to." He never took his eyes off Kelsey. Jake needs to be with her. He has to be with her. "Tomorrow we are going anywhere that someone might die. The hospital. We will go there." With a determined nod he left the room and settled down on the couch allowing Jake to stay in the room with Kelsey.

Kelsey woke up and ground softly. Her hair was a mess, and her shirt was twisted around her body. Looking around the room, she found it empty. As always. For a moment she just say there, once again wondering if last night was real. She dropped her head in her hands a cried a few tears. Crying had gotten less and less, which was good. Finally, she pushed herself from the bed only to hear soft snoring.

Slowly she crept around the corner and saw a man on her couch. She put a hand over her mouth, her heart races. Kelsey was scared for a moment but tiptoed around the couch to see Shayne. "It wasn't a dream," she said softly and sat down on the armchair across from the couch. Kelsey smiled a bit when she noticed her puppy curled up behind Shayne's back.

Shayne opened his eyes and saw that precious woman. The determination rose in him again. "You're beautiful. Jake wanted me to tell you that." He lied..
 
The night had been wonderful but the next morning when he walked into the living room to hear another man indirectly call his woman beautiful...Jake wasn't exactly a happy ghost. He stood over Shayne, and if he were solid, would have blocked his sight of Kelsey.

"What do you think your doing...?"

If his muscles still worked they would have twitched in irritation.

"Your supposed to be helping me, communicating CORRECTLY for me. Not flirting with her. I want you to move on as well but not her. You can't have her. Once I get a body...I want her back"

Anger and irritation was building in his voice. As it did, a glass bowl on the coffee table flew from it's place, smashing into the wall with great force, breaking it into tiny pieces. He didn't care though, finally an emotion was clear for both Kelsey and Shayne to see physically. Jake stood up strait and begin to pace, trying to calm himself down. As he did, to his suprise, the floor creaked, and there were a few faint footsteps. A small smirk crossed his face. It was about time.
 
Kelsey saw Shayne's face tighten like he was hearing something. He almost looked angry. She stood up to see if he was okay but then a bowl shattered. Her eyes widened and once again placed her hand over her mouth. Jake was here. He wasn't just a cool breeze. Then the floor creaked and there were footsteps. It was all too much. Kelsey hit the floor with a thud.

"Damnit Jake! Caused her to pass out," Shayne shouted and hovered over the woman on the ground. She couldn't tell what he was saying, she just heard voices. Kelsey blinked her eyes slowly as she came to. Shayne was still there and the familiar chill was too. At that moment she knew she wasn't living in a dream. This was real. Jake is still there. No more denying it.

Kelsey sat up with some assistance from Shayne. As soon as she was off the ground Shayne took a step back, he didn't want to anger Jake anymore than he already had. "What happened?" She asked softly still in a bit of shock. Looking down, Shayne ran his hand through his hair "Jake didn't say you were beautiful it was me." Kelsey raised an eyebrow. "oh? Well Shayne.. I'm flattered but Jake.. he is" Shayne cot her off by nodding he knew where this was going, and he didn't want to hear it.

"we gotta get going," Shayne said gruffly. It was time for them to start looking for a new body. One that both Jake and Kelsey would like.
 
Jake didn't feel sorry excapt for Kelsey. But He had finnished helping her and the door slammed shut behind him as the two walked out.

"Why Did you do that to begin with?" he stopped in his tracks. "Can I not bring you over here without you flirting?"

Jake growled to himself then walked past Shayne. For the rest of the day he followed him, them looking for a body. He was a bit anxious to take the body..Why should he get to live and the other person not? It wasn't right but he wanted it so much. If he did he would get to be with Kelsey. But if he did then he would have a new family to deal with. It was a price he was willing to pay. Jake would do anything for Kelsey, anything to hold her and kiss her again. Jake smiled to himself when he thought of it.
 
"How would she have known if you said or if I had said it. I know you were thinking it." Shayne narrowed his eyes at the ghost. He ignored the last comment about flirting with Kelsey. He knew once Jake found a body all flirty would be done. Jake could beat him up then. "Let's get into the hospital. I have connection. Maybe we can get you someone dying today." He grinned then turned a corner heading towards the ER.

One of Shayne's friends came out with a pair of scrubs. He informed Shayne that badges don't matter they don't really pay attention to them. "Do you want them to be attractive?" Shayne asked Jake softly. He didn't want to come across too crazy. Deep down he hoped they would find this body today. Once he is in it he can go through the process of weeding out the other guys thoughts and dealing with his family and significant other. Glancing at all the sick people he sorta felt bad. Imagine having a loved one come back to life, but it not be him.

Then there it was the unmistakable sound of coding. "Go!" Shayne encouraged him. Soon enough Shayne was in the door way staring at the man. Luckily, it was a man and not a woman... that would have been unfortunate. He was an attractive guy, Kelsey would like him. Then his heart beat was found again. The weeping blonde looked up. Everything was fine. But was it Jake? Shayne wasn't paying attention to whether the ghost was in the room or not, he was focused on the man.

(( I sorta left how the man looks up to you.. if you don't mind. I could also pick up the blonde woman? So we can play the whole sorting through things out... if you want? ))
 
Being around the dying was a whole new experience. The peoples spirits were half in and half out of thier body and furthermore they sounded like they were in pain. Suddenly he heard Shayne shout and he felt himself being drawn to a room. Not by choice but like he was being pulled along. Then as he was pulled into the room he spotted the spirit of the man leaving his body. It was a shame, the man was just as young as he was. The body had styled shaggy blonde hair and bright silver colored eyes. The now spirit watched in suprise and horror as Jake entered his body. It was strange, openening his eyes, the eyes of the physical body he now possed. Memories of a beautiful blonde woman danced along in his head along with many other memories of a family and life that was familiar somehow but at the same time, unfamiliar.

He felt his eyes sting as they changed from a silver to a bright, lively green. The color of Jake's eyes when he was in his old body. He reached up and gently rubbed his eyes to try and alieveate the stinging. Jake looked around a bit confused, his mind now foggy.
 
Shayne wanted to shout for joy. Jake had made it! Everything was going as planned. It was all working out. He would have Kelsey soon and the world will be right.. maybe.. His heart break when he realized how the life of this man was about to change. The people in his life will be confused. It will be tough.

The blonde woman smiled through her tears. Leaning over she kissed her boyfriend. "I'm so glad you made it," Ava murmured. "Your mom and I have stayed here the whole time." The woman stroked his hair gently. Her eyebrows furrowed when she noticed his eyes. They were a green. A green she had never seen before. Maybe it was some medical thing. She brushed the thought away.. at least she had him back. "We moved in with your Mom now. The doctors said that after the accident you might not remember things so I need to tell you." Ava smiled kindly.

Shayne slipped out of the doorway. It was lonely not having some nagging ghost following him around, but it was for the best.

A couple days later the doctors released the man. Ava made him lay down in their room. It was a rather small room. A big king bed was right in the middle of it. "The doctor said once you feel well again.. we can do things like normal." Ava bit her lower lip and trailed her fingers down his chest. She headed out the door but stopped in the doorway "If you need me call me. I'm Ava." She felt a bit foolish having to tell her boyfriend her name but just in case.

Kelsey hadn't seen Shayne or felt Jake for awhile. The same urge to drink away the pain she was feeling again took over her. She put the glass to her lips but what Jake said popped into her mind. He had to still be there.. somewhere.. Sighing, she put the glass down and paced her apartment. Her stomach growled softly which forced her to check the fridge... empty.. Kelsey was going grocery shopping. After picking up her purse she was gone.
 
Jake could only remember his name...the name of the man escaped him but it had to be Aiden. Or something like that. The blonde woman Ava made him lay down but he didn't want to. He sat up, wincing in pain as he was still gaining control over a damaged body. He swallowed a lump in his throat and looked at her laying back down. This beautiful woman's fingers trailed lovingly down the chest of his new body. His heart rate increased a bit and he felt guilty. It kind of felt like he was cheating on someone...someone very important to him but for all it was worth he couldn't remember who...

"D-Do things like normal?" he asked.

The voice wasn't his at all, it was a bit smoother; a bit more refined with a british accent hanging in it.Jake was suprised, he blinked at Ava curiously.

"My name...I don't remember...Where are we?"
 
Ava nodded and sat on the edge of the bed. Gently she took his hand in hers. She ignored the question about doing things as normal and went straight to the other. "Aiden. Your name is Aiden. We live with your mom. Someone broke in and you got shot. She didn't want us on that part of town anymore." Ava placed a soft kiss on his forehead then curled up into bed next to him. It was comforting having him back, even if his eyes weren't the same.

"You are 24 years old. We met when I was studying abroad in England last year and you followed me home." Ava laughed and looked over at Aiden with twinkling blue eyes. What else could she tell him? Probably she should tell him everything and anything, but she didn't know where to start. Instead she decided to ask him a question. "Is there anything else you'd like to know? You didn't seem to want to lay down earlier. We could go to the store together? It would be a fast trip."
 
This was all so new to him...England? Aiden? Twenty-four? Jake was from the United states and was twenty-three. He shivered a bit in delight, from the past memories of this man, Aiden, but the Jake half of him was ashamed. It would be great to find out what he was missing...His eyes forrowed a bit in confusion.

"I feel different...I don't feel like Aiden is my name nor do I remember England...and are you sure I'm twenty-four? I don't remember having a birthday..."

Ava's eyes sparkled and for a brief moment felt guilty for not remembering like he should have. She was right, he didn't want to be stuck here in bed when he should be doing something differently. Jake nodded.

"S-Sure I'll go...sure beats laying in bed all day. That bloody hospital was enough."

Jake felt a smile go across his lips, and he couldn't help it, nor control his body it as he leaned forwards, placing a loving kiss on Ava's lips. As he pulled away a pit formed in his stoumuch. . .Something about this wasn't right...
 
"well then lets go my stud," She giggled softly and helped him off the bed. Everything felt right with the world. Ava wasn't going to let that comment about not being himself slide. The doctors said he might have some weird behavior. She laced her fingers with his and carefully walked out to the car. They were a little bit out of the city so they had to drive.

Kelsey was already searching the isles. A basket was in the crook of her arm as she stood in front of the drinks section. She was in the mood for gatorade. Mainly because Jake seemed to have kept it in the house and they were out. She might not ever drink it. Reaching up she grabbed for the orange kind and dropped it into the basket.

After the drinks she wandered around aimlessly trying to figure out what she had a taste for. Tuna.. and crackers! That sounded amazing. She found some stoned wheat crackers then looked for tuna. Score! Only two cans left. Perfect. A couple was heading down her same isle causing her heart to ache. The man was handsome. Nice hair, bright green eyes... his eyes. In mid motion she froze looking up at this stranger... something didn't feel so strange about him though.

Kelsey forced herself to look away. Not only did she want to come across weird, she hoped they didn't want tuna. Kelsey wasn't in the mood to share especially after seeing his eyes. Hurriedly she dropped the cans in the basket but missed. The cans hit the floor "damnit," she whispered.
 
The store seemed oddly familiar. It was like he had been here before which he probably had. Jake stuck close to Ava's side a bit worried about loosing himself in this place he could not remember. They went down the drinks isle and he didn't know why but he stopped infront of the sports drinks, gatorade. It looked great at the time being...carefully Jake reached up and grabbed the orange flavored one and wandered back over to Ava as she continued on down another isle.

As they were coming down the isle he spotted a woman, a rather beautiful woman. She fumbled with the remaning cans of tuna and dropped them to the floor. Jake felt compelled to go over to her so he did. Even though he winced as he crouched he picked up the cans of Tuna, dropping them into her basket, orange gatorade still in hand. He looked up at her as he straitened himself out. Jake placed a hand on his stoumuch, trying to will away the pain but it was still there and it showed a bit. He smiled, his eyes flashing in a familiar way.

"Lucky you.Tuna fish is good with those crackers. Enjoy them Miss..."

The more he looked at her the more familiar she seemed but none the less Ava was waiting for him. Jake turned to walk back towards the blonde.
 
Kelsey froze when he spoke. His eyes were too familiar. Tears stung her eyes as she watched him leave. He commented on the tuna. No one ever talks about tune. This strange man also had orange gatorade. Something in her pushed her forward. Something in her yearned for him. "Wait!" She shouted and trotted down the isle towards the man. The blonde looked at her a little possessive. "I'm Kelsey." She bit her lower lip and nodded "Sorry for interrupting you guys."

Slowly she turned away and rubbed her head, cursing herself softly for running up and telling a stranger her name. She had never seen him before and all he did was pick up her tuna. It had to be the stress she was under. Shayne and Jake weighed heavily on her mind. She took one last glanced over her shoulder at the couple.

"What was that about babe?" Ava asked concerned. No one had ever randomly introduced themselves to her boyfriend. That woman seemed upset though. Broken. Something bad must have happened. With a shrug Ava dismissed the thought and went to the check out line after finding some rice and chicken. She hoped they would leave the store without seeing Kelsey again... that plan didn't work.

Kelsey was in the next line over. A finger resting on her lips as she focused on the cover of a magazine. Of course their was a celebrity on the front of it and knowing Kelsey it was a star from the Twilight movies. Even though she was 22 with a college education her weakness was the never ending war of Edward and Jacob. She always said something about how pure their love shown through even it they proved it to her in weird ways. Love stories were always her weakness.
 
The name...the name sparked something in him. Jake. His name was Jake and that woman...she was something precious to him. Jake looked back over at Ava after she asked him what that little scene was about.

"I-I just went to go help her with her groceries but...now I think I remember her from somewhere..a friends or something perhaps..."

Jake pondered this as he followed Ava. Kelsey, Kelsey?! Why couldn't he remember who this was to him. It couldn't be a girlfriend, Ava was right here. Though Jake didn't love Ava some physical Instinct kept him close to her side. As they were about to check out he spotted her again. It bothered him so much that as Ava checked out, Jake went back over to Kelsey, he bit his lip, fumbling over his new British accent.

"Sorry about back there...And I don't mean to bother you now but...I was just released from the hospital, got shot or something says my lady Ava. When you said your name...it made me remember something...and that is good considereing my fuzzy memory as of late. Do you mind if you give me your number or something? I might need to chat with you Miss a bit later...that is if you don't mind.." he chuckled nervously, holding the spot on his torso he had been shot in.
 
Just as Kelsey grabbed the magazine with Kristin Stewart of then front of it she heard the man's voice. Glancing up at him she smiled a bit, but it quickly faded when he mentioned getting shot. Things are too similar. It's scary... "Y-yeah.." She fumbled through her purse to find pen and paper but only came out holding a pen. "I don't have paper. Would your hand be okay?" Shyly she reached for his hand then looked up at him.

His eyes... that's where she got drawn to. It meant nothing, she had been telling herself since she saw him. It had to be a coincidence. After all he had a British accent and was dating a blonde. She didn't understand why she would be familiar to him. Maybe he knew Jake and some point and they met in passing. Who knows?

Ava looked over at the exchange rather annoyed. Her boyfriend had just gotten out of the hospital and was paying some girl he had just met a lot of attention and now she was writing something on his hand. This was lovely. "Aiden, why did you go talk to her?" Ave looked hurt when she asked that question. She wasn't used to her boyfriend having random conversations with strangers. She was used to him beings hers. Things have changed and she is growing tired of blaming on the accident.