Hiding the Scars

[TotallyMe]

*WARNING: Some things that occur in this roleplay may trigger people. Everyone's brains work differently, so please rp and read with caution. Thank you.*

Lilly felt like the entire classroom was staring at her. Were her bruises showing?

She could feel the eyes of the guy sitting in the desk beside her looking. It made her shift uncomfortably in her seat every so often. She couldn't focus. She tried all she could. She can't fail this test Friday. She already was down to a C.

But most of all, distracting her was the sight of her teacher, Mr. Bynes staring at her. Lilly knew he was staring, because she could see him in her peripheral vision. Maybe he was looking at the one beside her staring?

Why was everyone staring at her??

Lilly, suddenly self-conscious, pulled the hem of her sleeves lower; she could now hold the end of her sleeves in her palms with her fingertips.

She felt the urge to cut. She had to. There was no other way to make the feeling go away. Or feelings. She never tried to do it at school. What if someone walked in? Or told? Gosh, just thinking about it made her fidget.

She would have to wait until she got home, that is if her parents wouldn't hurt her first.

Lilly brown eyes slowly raised to look at the board to finish writing her math problem, but instead met the face of a... different looking Mr. Bynes. She couldn't make out his facial expression.

He was standing right in front of the board, in front of the part of the equation she needed to write. She blinked once or twice and looked back at her paper, subtly tucking a light blondish brown strand of hair behind her ear. She would just get the rest of the problem tomorrow. Hopefully she could finish it before it was due.

 

[Blue Jay]

Bishop tapped his pencil lightly against his left forearm, his arms crossed in front of him on the desk. He had already finished the current set of problems and was waiting impatiently for Mr. Bynes to move onto the next set. Yet the teacher seemed very preoccupied with something. At first Bishop thought he was looking at him but that made little sense as he wasn't being disruptive and was doing his class work. He quickly determined that it was not himself that Mr. Bynes was so interested in but the girl seated next to him. Lilly Somethingortheother, Bishop had never gotten around to asking her name. Just sat next to her everyday in math as usual. But today something was off.
He turned his head discretely to the right, eyeing the girl from the corner of his eye. At first glance there was nothing out of the ordinary. But she seemed to know he was looking at her for her eyes suddenly darted in his direction. Bishop snapped his gaze forward again, continuing to tap his pencil and appear as interested in the math lesson as possible. He heard her shift in her seat, pulling her sleeves down past her wrists. She seemed a bit tense. He wasn't sure if it was because Mr. Bynes was being weird or if it were something else.
He didn't dare ask though.​

 

[JadedPriest]

Argus Woods

Dedicated slacker Argus Woods' snoring was beginning to get progressively louder, adding to Bishop's pencil tapping, the clock's rhythmic tock, the scraping of the chalk against the board in the monotonous classroom symphony. The dirty blond in a green hoodie jacket sat behind Lilly, whom he has always found a bit on the awkward side but found physically charming. He had a reputation of mindlessly hitting on one girl after the other with no success.

Like the usual everyday thing his snoring would eventually irritate Mr Bryne, and Mr Bryne would come over to his desk and slam a ton of thick text books on his desk and Argus would fall off his chair as per their usual student/teacher routine. At this point in the year, Byrne had already given up on writing him up.​

 

[TotallyMe]

After a minute or two of thoughts bombarding her brain, much feelings of insecurity, the loud snoring bothering her, and all of the sounds in the room cornering her until she was crushed, Lilly couldn't take it anymore.

She wanted not to draw attention to herself, especially if her sleeves fell when she raised her hand. So she put her elbow on the table and put her hand up, enough for Bynes to see. She never really fully raised her hand anyway, so he was used to knowing when she was wanting his service.

He walked over at a medium pace, his eyes studying her as he approached. Something was off about her today- more than usual. But he's wasn't the counselor, so he knew better than to ask students about their lives and conflicts, unless the student came to him first.

"Can I go to the bathroom?" Her voice could barely be heard over the noise of the room, which was as loud as someone quietly breathing. Lilly didn't speak up much. Not after what happened with her parents.

Her eyes could only look into Mr. Bynes' for a second as she asked, before her eyes darted elsewhere and anywhere but Mr. Bynes' face. Again, she shifted her weight in her seat uncomfortably.

 

[MischieviousCheshireX3]

She sat quietly near the windows in the classroom, blankly staring at a spot outside one of the window panes. Having already finished the math problems that were on the board, she absentmindedly started biting at her bottom lip as the white noise of the classroom itched at her ears. After blinking twice she came to her senses again and relaxed in her seat, her silent worries disappearing to the back of her mind as she glanced around the room. Her gaze landed on the fidgeting Lily as Mr. Bynes approached the girls desk, she easily picked out the expression he wore, it was one of guarded concern that wasn't hidden very well. She knew this expression very well because it waited for every time she stepped through the door of her house, for her family knew of the voices that whispered in her thoughts. She returned her gaze towards the window she was peering out of earlier as the sweep of mahogany bangs fell over her eyes and veiled her face from view, her fingers sketching on the scrap piece of paper of their own accord.

 

[CrimsonFang]

Aria thumped her head against the desk. She had finished the work on the board and she had no thing else to do. She had even completed the homework for tonight. Sometimes it really sucked being an over acheiver .Not only would she have nothing to do for the rest of the period but she would have nothing to do when she went home. Because her parents were never there. Always off on business and what not. She continued to listen to the loud snoring of the guy in the back who was always sleeping, and the constant tapping of a pencil.

Aria thumped her head on the desk again and looked out the window. Time was moving so slow. She sat up when she saw Mr. Bynes walk towards a girl who sat towards the front, im pretty sure her name is Lily. The girl looked as if she wanted to sprint out of the classroom. She always wore long sleeves and sweaters, maybe she was anemic. Aria turned her attention back to her desk and began to draw. When her cat ended up with 6 legs she gave up and dropped her head on the back of her chair.

 

[Penelope Sky]

Jesse sat, slumped in his seat, at the front of the room, his blue eyes intent on the problems in front of him. He hadn't finished them all - not even close - but it wasn't because he didn't want to complete them; he simply couldn't. Jesse didn't understand the signs, the variables, the numbers - it was a completely other language to him. Not even Greek or Spanish; more like hieroglyphs, or that ancient alien language his friend Brandon came up with. He sorted ideas out in his head, adding and subtracting, multiplying and dividing, but nothing made sense. The answer was either uneven and irrational, or perfectly simplistic, and Jesse couldn't decide which was better. Did Mr. Bynes make all the answers fractions just to trick them? Or were they simple as 1, 2, 3, and 4?

Jesse didn't know. And his lack of paying attention in earlier class lessons didn't contribute to his math knowledge in even a remotely positive way. All Jesse wanted to do was go to Brandon's place after school - play games and get high, if Brandon got a hold of his dad's stash, like he promised. Math was stupid to Jesse - it just was. Jesse knew what he was going to do when he came of age - he knew what he wanted to be. Math - all of these senseless equations and number theories - meant nothing to Jesse besides knowing how to count his money. Maybe even to measure out his product, when he could figure out how to make it.

Jesse shrugged, rolling his eyes. Truth was, Jesse wanted to make a lot of cash when he grew up, but with his lack of skill, he didn't know how. He felt wrong doing something illegal to meet his needs - he felt dirty and immoral. But he knew that he wouldn't be good at anything but just that - finding drugs and getting high. Playing video games. Hanging with friends. Hating teachers. Jesse felt like a failure, and not much else. The only talent he had was drawing, but he didn't share his pictures with anyone but his parents, and even that relationship was deteriorating.

Jesse pushed his problems aside, not bothering to try any harder, and grabbed his notebook from the bookrack under his desk. Plucking the pencil from the corner of the table, he opened the book and began to doodle, drawing another superhero created from the depths of his vast and vibrant imagination. This guy looked a bit like him, except he could walk backwards without tripping - and do it at super speed, too. It was a quick sketch - not one that he'd brag about, but he looked forward to drawing it later on his drawing paper. Backwardo would be his name. Jesse smirked.

Spending most of his time detached from the class events, Jesse didn't notice much that went on today. However, he could tell Mr. Bynes - that prick - was a little mentally preoccupied with something. Not that Jesse cared, but still, it was a little weird. Raising his brows, Jesse looked to the front, his eyes soon darting to the middle of the room as the teacher approached a girl in a sweater, awkwardly raising her hand.

Lilly. That girl was Lilly. Jesse had never talked to her before, but he'd seen her in class, even if he hadn't paid much attention to her. She was kinda cute, in that weird kind of way that Jesse never really understood, since he himself was the same way - cute in a stranger sense. Jesse, being intuitive despite his underachiever facade, noticed that there seemed to be something off about the girl today. Something more off than usual, and Jesse had to admit, he was a bit worried, but not enough to say anything.

Suddenly, his brain registered snoring in the background. Jesse had heard it before, but he never really paid much attention to it until he turned around at Lilly - until he woke up from his self induced fantasy, where he was a superhero with the power to walk backwards. Argus was in the back, as usual, sleeping, and snoring loud enough to disrupt the class next door. Jesse knew Argus - he was pretty good friends with Brandon, one of Jesse's own best friends - so he couldn't help but smirk. Jesse liked it when people were disruptive to a boring class, especially since it annoyed Mr. Bynes.

As the teacher approached Lilly's desk, Jesse turned back around, focusing on his drawing once more. Maybe this one would be good enough.

 

[TotallyMe]

"Yes, you may." Mr. Bynes said, looking iver Lily once more. He turned around halfway as he said, "Wait until I'm done talking to the class before you go, though." He was answered with a very subtle and barely noticeable nod, but he didn't pay attention. As he finished his sentence, he was already walking to the front of the class.

"Class, by looking at most of you, I assume you all are finished?" His voice was a bit annoyed, but still had the tiniest bit a distraction in it, too.

Lily waited impatiently, but didn't show it. In her mind, she was already out the door and outside, sitting on a yellow curb of a sidewalk and sorting out her thoughts. But this was reality, her sitting in a hard, uncomfortable desk and waiting to go to the bathroom, to get rid of the feeling she had.

She thought that's what she does. Getting rid of the negative feelings and thoughts, but really, she was only pushing them away, to the back of her mind, where soon they would be pulled to the front again.

 

[MischieviousCheshireX3]

When the pencil in her hand stopped she looked down at what she had been drawing, finding that it was a much too happy girl with bubblegum for hair. She sighed in exasperation and tilted her head back, the world flipped upside down in her view while everyone else appeared to be hanging from the new make shift ceiling.

In her head a voice singled itself out and asked 'who are you?' in a sing song tone, maybe it was trying to tease her or something, but she didn't really care. Softly she whispered in reply to humor the voice, if nothing else, "Who am I? I'm Ebony Tweed, who are you?" But alas her reply didn't win her much more than a silly snicker and a round of laughter inside her head.

Sighing as the time felt like it was doing nothing but dragging itself forward halfheartedly, she started rapping her knuckles against the desk's table top in time with the ticking of the clock, maybe it then it would quit dragging but she doubted the idea. When the snoring of the sleeping slacker started to grow louder and made it harder for her to hear the clock, she impulsive picked up the closest thing to her fingers and chucked the weight object at his head. Must've been that fat, pink eraser that had been sitting on her desk, but it doesn't matter really she had thrown much worse before.

She disregarded the teacher without a second thought and spoke loud enough for the slacker to hear, " Yo sleepy of the seven dwarves, cut the racket will you, it feels like you're taking a cheese grater to my brain you're snoring so friggin loud."Now satisfied she righted herself in her seat and cocked the eyebrow over one of her amber eyes and gave a wry smile, daring Mr. Bynes to say something to her for interrupting what would have been his little speech.

 

[JadedPriest]

Argus let out a loud and obnoxious groan to the sudden outburst in his direction, Surely this her loud shout towards him was enough to stop any lesson dead in its tracks as Argus stretched his arms and legs as far as he could and gave the clock above the board a glance. "Mother of god, I must've had 100 dreams and only 5 minutes have past?? Come oooonnnn" obviously aggravated he took his desk by the sides and wobbled from side to side like some kind of child in a tantrum.

Mr Brynes finally had enough of his antics, "Woods! that is IT, I've had it with you, head over to the principles office right NOW!...I'll give him a call over the meaning of your arrival."

"Phew, what a relief" He replied snyly as he strapped his backpack over his shoulder and made his way over to exit the class. But before fully exiting, he shot Jesse a look while the teacher was preoccupied with the phone and signed to him crossed fingers (the elementary school sign to "use the bathroom" followed by the universal sign of smoking pot. Since Brandon was taking the day off after coming down with "a case of diarrhea", and he wasn't too into smoking on his own.​

 

[Penelope Sky]

Jesse looked up from his drawing, casually sliding his pencil in the notebook's spiral binding. He smirked as he saw Argus's symbols - two he recognized with great comfort and familiarity: the bathroom, and pot. Jesse allowed himself to smirk one more time before nodding in response, flashing a small and slightly unrecognizable thumbs up before Argus exited the room.

As Argus walked out of class, Jesse sat up a bit straighter, folding his hands close to his chest and trying his best to fabricate his best innocent-young-man kind of look. Usually, Jesse wasn't too afraid to slouch in his seat or mouth off to teachers he didn't like, but he wanted to ensure he'd make it to the bathroom soon, to meet with Argus, and any kind of back talk would more likely send him to the principal's office.

For a moment, as Mr. Bynes discussed Argus's wrong-doings to Principal Molina, Jesse studied his drawing. It didn't look as pristine as he wanted it to, seeing as how it was done on flimsy lined paper with a two inch pencil, but Jesse admired his work for what it was. Backwardo was an interesting superhero. Not Spiderman or anything, but walking backwards super fast was good skill to have, especially if someone charged him with a knife or something. Silently, Jesse wished that he too had a super power. Something that would set him apart from the rest. Something that made him more of a shining star, rather than a fizzled old match who can't keep off the weed.

Whatever, he said to himself, shaking his head and closing his notebook. Quickly, he glanced back at Lilly, who was nervously fidgeting with the sleeves of her sweater as she gazed intently at the door, probably hoping to get out of here just as much as Jesse was. He wondered what was up with her today - seemed more bummed than usual. Maybe he'd ask her later.

Or maybe not.

Jesse wasn't great at that kind of stuff. And, besides, Mr. Bynes was off the phone now. All Jesse had to do was ask. Smiling innocently with a shine in his bright blue eyes, the young slacker raised his hand slightly, only going a little above his head.

The teacher, in his middle ages, turned to him, shooting him an accusatory glare. Prick. "What is it?" he questioned, his voice stern. Bynes never liked Jesse - the student never tried his best - but it didn't matter; Jesse didn't like Bynes much, either.

He tried to remain docile. Smiling slightly, he pleaded, his eyes displaying warmth and amazingly fabricated respect, "Uh, hey, when you're like, done with the lesson, could I maybe use the bathroom?" Manners, yo. He smiled and added, nervously wringing his pale hands and studying Bynes' s suspicious expression, "Please."

Bynes stood for a moment, seeming to ponder something as he glanced back and forth between Jesse, Lilly, and the front board. Finally, he asked, his thick brows raised, "You finish your problems, Pinkman?" He looked down at the unfinished math work on Jesse's desk and frowned.

Jesse's eyes widened slightly as he slid the paper under his notebook, his heart racing wildly. His facade fading, Jesse said, trying to appear earnest, "Yeah, totally, Mr. Bynes. They're all done." He stared sincerely up at the man, hoping to sway him, but to no avail. Mr. Bynes scoffed, gesturing to the board, his gaze glued to a sweating Jesse.

"Copy these problems then finish them," he instructed, eyes narrowed. "Then you use them bathroom." He turned to Lilly, a softness appearing in his weathered features as his somberness began to alleviate. "You can go now. At least you get your work done," he said indignantly.

Prick.

 

[AnimeGurl]

Emily had been listening to her IPhone with her earphones in while this all happened. She sat behind the guy that snored and had grown onto music thanks to him. She watched everything go down in class and copied the problems and all. She kept one earphones out but kept the one in loud enough for her to hear but quiet enough so she could listen. She tapped her mechanical pencil on her notebook paper while he talked on and on. She watched the sky and moving clouds as she played attention, wrote everything down, and listened to music. She had a weirs thing with her that meant she could do ten or so things at once and in the end they were all like they should be and she always stayed on time and topic.

Spoiler

 

[CrimsonFang]

Aria watched as Mr. Bynes granted Lily permission to leave. I wonder if she has any friends. Lily didn't look like the shallow type. Aria often spent lunch and any free time alone but that was clearly not working out for her. It might be fun to invite someone over to the house, make it feel less empty, or go out to the movies or something, I think it's time I got a social life.

Warm brown eyes swept the classroom and then landed on Jesse. After Argus had walked out he had a smile on his face. Aria couldn't help but look at his eyes. They were such a pretty blue , if you could call a guys eyes pretty. But she would never tell him that... to his face any way. According to most people in the school he was someone who liked to look for trouble, of course you shouldn't judge someone before you knew them but Aria was still cautious.

I cant take this anymore im getting out of here. Aria raised her hand for permission to spend the rest of the period in the library, it wasn't like they were doing anything anyway. She raised her hand.

"Mr. Bynes can I get a pass to the library. Im finished with the problem sets and I can get work done for others classes instead of sitting here doing nothing. You know be more productive?" He contemplated for a few seconds and then nodded his head and wrote a pass.

Aria smiled she could go to the library or wander around the halls. But she didnt really feel like doing any work at the moment so she figured she'd just wander and if anyone asked or got suspicious as to why she was walking the halls she would just say she was on her way to the library. She could even try to catch up with Lily and ask if she wanted to sit with her at lunch. Or she could even just go home. im just gonna get out of here.

 

[MischieviousCheshireX3]

Now that the noise maker was gone she smiled happily to herself and laced her fingers under her chin as she leaned on her elbows, being nice enough to give Mr. Bynes her undivided attention, well that's not really true, for the moment. But soon enough the act was getting old and the room itself felt like it was closing in around her, glancing around the room she noticed that Aria had raised her hand and asked if she could go to the library.

Thinking quick on the situation, Ebony quickly raised her hand to get Mr. Bynes attention, "Umm excuse me Mr. Bynes, but do you mind if i go to the library with Aria? I've already finished the work for this class.

 

[JadedPriest]

Of course Argus had no intention of heading to the principle's office. He strayed off to the bathroom just down the hall between two segments of lockers, and to the last and final stall closest to the window.

To think they were barely reaching the halfway point of the school day, the morning had dragged on forever and seemed to come to complete halt in that class specifically. Sitting on the toilet lid he slipped off his backpack to his lap, opened the main zipper that contained his binder, in there was a hidden velcro pocket that contained his pot in a medicine container. He pulled out the rolling paper from his pencils pocket and began forming a line of the weed over the paper, carefully picking out the stems. It was during this process where he was oblivious to how strong a scent his stuff actually gave off.

Thoughts of expulsion never seemed to cross his mind whenever he decided to indulge on campus, and unlike jesse he has yet to figure out what he was gonna do. Things always have a habit of "working out for him".

 

[Penelope Sky]

Jesse was becoming unimaginably perturbed. What the hell was up with that? Letting those two girls study at the library but not letting him use the bathroom? For all Mr. Bynes knew, Jesse just had to take a piss; nothing more, nothing less. Ever hear of, like, civil rights? He imagined himself asking the teacher, getting up in his wrinkled old face and pinning him in the corner like a hungry cat chasing a feeble, dying mouse. Because, I've got tons of them! Maybe if you actually created a decent lesson plan for once, like a good teacher, I could know the answers and actually be out of this hellhole. Prick.

Sighing deeply, Jesse rolled his eyes and hung his head in his hands, weighing down his palms like a two ton brick. All he wanted to do was escape; make it out of this classroom - this coma of a life, where he dragged on and on, everyday, like a monochromatic assembly line of fatal monotony, taking crap from his parents and being picked on by teachers who never cared anyway. The only thing in the world he wanted was to make a change, and, while getting high was temporary, it would have to suffice.

Sighing again, Jesse slid the math paper from under his notebook, and returned the book to its original spot under his desk before copying the remaining problems onto his sheet.

Impatiently, he stared at the problems, rubbing his eye with one hand and tapping his tiny pencil with the other. Jesse had to admit, he felt a little bad for holding the entire class up because he couldn't finish, but once he decided how much it annoyed Mr. Bynes, he didn't care. God, what the hell is this? He asked himself, his eyes narrowing in frustration at the foreign looking math problem.

Giving up hope, Jesse looked around the room, hoping for some kind of spurt of genius - either on how to finish these problems, or how to get the hell out of here. He noticed that Aria - she was supposed to be pretty smart; kinda pretty, too - was gone, as well as the other, loud mouth chick with mahogany hair. At the library - too lucky, those girls.

Jesse shook his head, sighing again. Finally, he came up with something. A little feeble, and not as air tight, but it was good enough.

Quickly, Jesse scribbled the most random numbers he could come up with, smiling mischievously as he did it, his blue eyes aglow. Once he was finally finished, he slammed his miniture, dull-tipped pencil on the desktop, sitting up stright and raising his hand high into the sky, grinning contentedly.

Mr . Bynes looked up from his desk work, sighing deeply. "What is it this time, Pinkman?" he asked, his brows arched, bracing himself for whatever bullcrap he'd spout next.

"Hey, I finished those problems, " Jesse replied, smirking subtly and nodding his head in a take-that kind of way. Mr. Bynes looked unconvinced, flashing him his most signature did-you-really kind of glare. Jesse nodded even more emphatically, his grin widening. "Yeah, all done. So, can I, uh, use the bathroom?"

Mr. Bynes stared blankly at the boy, shaking his head slightly in disbelief. "Did you try your best? " he asked him, knowing the answer already. Mr. Bynes disliked Jesse's behavior, but he knew he was smart deep down, and always hoped he'd apply himself to at least something.

Jesse didn't even think about the answer. "Oh yeah," he replied, nodding some more to reinforce the lie. "Totally A-grade, Mr. Bynes."

The teacher sighed. "Then go," he said authoritatively, waving him away with a dismissive hand motion and rolling his sunken amber eyes.

Jesse smirked, flippng over his paper to the blank, untouched side and practically scampering out of his seat. Yeah, bitch, he said to himself, sauntering out of class with his hands in his pockets. Freedom.

 

[MischieviousCheshireX3]

Ebony didn't even bother going in the direction of the library, she just needed out and out is what she got.

Finally she sighed as if in defeat and mumbled to herself, "I don't want to rely on stupid medication just to quiet these damnable voices for just an hour or two before they come seeping through the cracks . . ." Half the things she did she couldn't help because the voice's tell her to do it and then her body just reacts for her. Her outburst earlier was just one of those times that all the noise, inside and out, that the noise had gotten to her and she just couldn't handle it anymore.

Ebony soon found her way to the girl's bathroom and found the fidgeting Lily inside. Looking at the girl's frame you could tell she was tense and that turmoil was swirling underneath her skin like a storm. She lightly tapped the girl's shoulder in one of her rare moments of clarity and spoke. "Hey Lily, is something bugging you? Sometimes it helps to talk about it."

 

[CrimsonFang]

Aria was out of the classroom and walking down the hall when sheheard the door open and close behind her. She turned back and saw Ivory. She had never really had any type of conversation with Ebony well with anyone in her class but figured she should at least try an attempt to be social.

Aria paused, she debated if she should say something but then figured that Ebony didnt want to be bothered. She seemed kind of unapproachable. Or maybe im just being a wuss. Aria quickly turned back around and started to walk again. I'll try next time, definetly next time.

 

[TotallyMe]

(Sorry for disappearing guys! School and extra curricular. :/ )

Lily's brown eyes flickered across the bathroom, looking for something at least fairly sharp. Anything would do. She had to push the feelings away.

Lily jumped ten feet it the air, it seemed, when someone tapped her shoulder and started to talk to her. She was so caught up in her tornado of thoughts she didn't hear her come in.

For a second she thought she was caught. The girl knew everything. But then she remembered, she's not in her mind, and she was only standing at the moment.

As she turned around, she quickly pulled her sleeves down again, holding them with her fingertips.

She didn't really know the girl. She's seen her around though, she knew.

Why does this stranger want to know her business?

"I-I'm fine." She said quietly, it was barely audible. The reply seemed to answer both the question and statement, though she was only answering one.

 

[MischieviousCheshireX3]

Ebony watched the girl's face and saw the protective cage slam down in her eyes, "Do you really believe that? Anyone with a little sense can look at you and tell something is bothering you, and when someone as dense as Mr. Bynes notices, that's saying something. Though coming from me that's the pot calling the kettle black."

She held out her hand in an awkward attempt at a greeting and looked away with a slight flush of color in her cheeks, "I'm Ebony, you've probably never noticed me unless I was yelling, but I'm in your class, I sit behind you by the windows, but if you need someone to talk to I'm here I guess. Though this is probably weird for you, it is for me too"