Heartache

I

Iliana

Guest
Original poster
Someone close to you passes. You didn't get that promotion you were promised. Your lover leaves you for someone else. You lose your favorite item. All of those situations head the same results: instant heartache. It hurts like hell and sometimes swallows us whole, leaving us isolated from all people.

How do you all conquer heartache?

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Is it a specific food or drink? Person? Hobby? Other?


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-sighs- Damn, this makes me flashback into those moments of my life I would love to erase but at the same time keep in mind.

I have lost a family member that meant the world to me. My great-grandma, a woman that was strong but at the end, the cancer was stronger than her. I dealt with this badly the first few months. Every time I would cry and wish I could be next to her, I will remind myself that this is not what she would want me to be. So I try and learned how to live. Each time I feel happy, I think of her. This keeps me going.

The second person I lost, was who I thought to be 'the one'. Of course he didn't die but I ended up loosing him. It was not because we wanted it, my mother forbid me to see him. That one, was as hard as loosing my granny. But I told myself "there are enough fishes on the sea" so I just learn how to live with it. After 3 years, I still would think of him but now, I let it go. He is happy with a new person and I am happy for him. It took a lot from me to learn how to let go.

Situations like these are hard to endure but you have to keep going forward because life isn't going to wait for you. Time heals wounds but leave scars as a reminder. It is for you to choose whether you are strong enough to overtake them or to let them rule your life with fear.
 
I think moving away from my family hurt me the most and it still hurts me now. For my family to go through the shock of me having a boyfriend, moving in with him, and also knowing that he lived in a different state, all of these things they learned and experienced in a couple of months. The only reason I had gone through with it was because I was upset with my family at the time and I wanted to live with my boyfriend. But seeing my father pop into my room randomly to see if I was still there, see my mother worry and my grandmother cry when I left - it absolutely ripped my heart apart.
 
you know this is as good a place to ask since i feel broken hearted right now.

ok so this morning i woke up to a text message from my life long friend and he told me he loved me and wanted to be with me. now most of you might think of this as good but this guy means so much to me i mean he was with me for my whole life ((no joke i was around 4 when our parents started hanging out)) and well he has seen me at my lowest points when my dad was still living with us to the time he had to drive me to the hospital when they thought i had cancer ((i wouldnt drive and i never told my family so he went through the hell of that with me)) and he knows im messed up ((most people call me damaged goods)) when it comes to love and such. and when he sent this to me my heart dropped because i love him i mean i dont think i could ever love anyone like i love him. But i have this thinig about me that i seperate myself from my relationships almost to the point of not caring i mean i can love somebody but never want to see them again or in the case of my last ex i could just be a bitch because he would do stuff romantic and i would kinda space out. and well i just dont want that to happen between us i just dont want myself to be hurt if he starts to hate me and never speaks to me again. I have been ignoring everything since this morning ((my mom told everyone who called that i was asleep and was feeling sick)) because i dont want to deal with it. how do i tell him that i love him but i dont want to loose him. someone might think of this as putting him in the friendzone but i am actually not i am wanting to put myself in that spot so that i dont get hurt if he ever thinks that i am to damaged for him. im actually scared that i lost the only person i care about.
 
You are not as messed up or damaged as you think. The kinds of worries you have are nothing to be afraid of. Approach him with trust, keep an open mind, and most importantly, dont think too far ahead, dont get trapped by what-ifs. Take things day by day and allow time to speak for itself.

Also, do everything important in person. Confessions should be done in person.
 
Heartache. I know it FAR too well.

Hm.
Ive handled it multiple ways:
Wait it out.
Cry for months.
Destroy myself from the inside out. Or outside in. o .x''
Play videogames a lot.
Draw and write poetry.
Sing loudly.
Write songs.
Play my drumset HARD AND FAST. >:C
Watch horror movies.
Run.
Yoga.
Pet mah dog.
Sleep.

Soyeah.
That helps. Sometimes?
Heartache takes time. And willpower.
Soon, maybe not soon, you find another to fill the void, if you are lucky, that last person to fill it, the right person to fill it, the one you hope does not leave that spot in your heart that is now filled once more.
And you want them to stay. And it makes everything that hurt in the past feel like insignificant memories..
And it is worth the pain. c:
 
unanun said:
You are not as messed up or damaged as you think. The kinds of worries you have are nothing to be afraid of. Approach him with trust, keep an open mind, and most importantly, dont think too far ahead, dont get trapped by what-ifs. Take things day by day and allow time to speak for itself.

Also, do everything important in person. Confessions should be done in person.
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i did talk to him today we are going to try
He said if we can make it past my birthday ((in nineteen days)) then we can make it for the long haul XD
 
Roses are red-
Violets are blue-
Vodka is cheaper-
Then dinner for two.

How to deal with lost love.
 
im not i found that on a web comic and i fell in love with it XD
 
I am of the opinion that laughter is the best medicine. If I am feeling down, then I go and search for a good laugh, no matter where it may come from. It makes me forget everything that has made me sad, and it lifts up my spirits, so it does its job perfectly. The only problem is that sometimes, it does not help if I only forget about my problems for the time. So when I feel like I still have something on my chest after laughing, something that I really need to get rid of, then I write. Without thinking about anything, I let my thoughts guide my hands and write down what I am feeling, or just write the beginning lines of a poem to get the heartache out of my system.
 
I conquer heartache the same way I do all things: Identify the problem, systematically develop a method to get around it, and move forward with the plan.

Dwelling on things means you can't move past them or get anything done. Quite frankly, I have no patience for moping, in myself or others.

Whether you seal off your emotions for a time, distract yourself with a hobby, or throw yourself into your work to overcome it, I don't particularly care. Get it done.

After all, while you stop to mope, the world moves on around you and leaves you behind.
 
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