I hate that I can't stop crying over this. Last night my boyfriend told me my sister is prettier than me. To put it in a numeric scale, she'd be a 4/5, while I'm more of a 2/5. He didn't say it with ill intentions, but he doesn't understand why it irks me so bad. I've felt and been told I'm uglier than her all of my life, of course it irks me. Okay, that was it, I went to sleep feeling like shit, and today I woke up feeling like shit, but after a couple of hours I was feeling better. That, until my father goes and tells me I'm fat. 'You'd look okay with a couple of kilos less' among other things. Being called ugly by classmates back in highschool was one thing, but it's absolutely terrible being told these things by the people I care for the most in my life. To make it worse, physical appearance doesn't matter that much to me... When it comes to other people. I always find something appealing aesthetic-wise in other people, and decide I like them based only on their personalities and our experiences together. But I'm my worst abuser, I'm unable to give myself the same treatment. When it comes to myself, I'm the most superficial piece of shit ever, and I hate that I don't look at least like a 4/5 or a 5/5. This came out a bit like a rant, but I want advice. Or some kind words. I'm in need of kind words. Also teach me how not to be an asshole to myself.