fortunately/unfortunately.

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Fortunately everyone kept sabotaging each other because all of them wanted to rule the world - even the ice cream man.
 
Unfortunately, my evil seventh grade English teacher managed to evade all sabotage, and ended up becoming the evil overlord of the world, scaring every child by popping out her deformed arm stump unexpectedly and making anyone with improper grammar diagram sentences on chalkboards for years.
 
Fortunately, the chalkboards snapped in half.
 
Unfortunately, there were plenty of whiteboards.
 
Fortunately, the computers rose up against the teacher.
 
Unfortunately, the teacher foresaw this and before their uprising, put a mind control virus into the computers, thus letting the teacher control the computers with just her mind, and turned the computers back on the kids.

(Don't you just love how we went from winning a lottery to this? x3 )
 
Fortunately, the children knew karate.
 
unfortunately, since their opponents were computers, they also knew karate. And every other martial art in existence, due to the internet database that they were connected to.
 
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Fortunately, every kid figured out that water would destroy all the computers, and began using super soakers to fight back.
 
Unfortunately they ran out of water, and there was still more computers facing them.
 
Fortunately, the children were lucky enough to fight off the computers.
 
Unfortunately they were still lacking water, which due to the vast number of dead computers, was slowly turning into an acidic substance.
 
Fortunately, they realized they could shut the computers down permanently by cutting off their main power supply, which happened to be Arianna Grande's voice. The world was soon free of the computers and her god awful singing.
 
Unfortunately, this caused an uprising in all of Ariana Grande's haters, causing them to make a parody about her death: "We got one less problem without ya!"
 
Fortunately she's in a better place now?? ; A ; ?
 
Unfortunately, she was replaced by yet another screechy voiced banshee, and the computers made a return.
 
Fortunately, somehow the computers became the computer equivalent of fan-boys to the new singer, and thus were too distracted by this new, terrible singer to even care about attacking people.
 
Unfortunately, that meant that every radio station in the world would play at least one of the banshee's songs every half hour.
 
Fortunately, it caused an uprising of both noise-canceling headphones AND independent radio stations with actual music.
 
Unfortunately, the fanboys and fangirls in much rage that they were avoiding their idol's songs, attacked the private radio stations, taking them over.
 
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