Fancies of My Mind

Discussion in 'THREAD ARCHIVES' started by Sir Salty, May 28, 2016.

  1. Voice

    I want to hear a voice call out from the darkness. Not when they feel the need to, not when they feel like they should. But I want a voice to call out from the darkness and tell me that I matter. That I am worth something. Though the constant repeating lesson I get on over my head is that's not the case.

    There's my voice in the darkness. It echoes heartbeats of pain, it reverberates misery. Even if there is a glimmer or a shine of light, it's faded away by the fog that is in the back of my mind. It's quiet in here, quiet and sad. I don't want the times when I break, being the times people consider me.

    When I am visibly sad. Am I always visibly sad I wonder? I sit on the bus and I ask myself, can people see I don't want to go through any of this any more? When I sit on the bus, do I exude an aura that says that I am poison? When I speak am I lacking emotion? When I am speaking am I a hostage of my own insanity?

    Can anyone see the gun being pulled to my head? Or is it easier to ignore it?

    I want to hear a voice in the darkness. Not when it's clear that it's all broken me down. Not when it's clear that I am broken inside. Not when I am crying and they feel they need to give me sympathy. I want neither sympathy. I want neither the pity.

    I want the understanding. I want the compassion. I want the kindness.

    I want the voice that calls out from the darkness, to say "I understand".