Family Secrets

Juliette's head lowered as she took the book from Bea. The girl looked like she wanted to melt away into the wooden kitchen floor. Bianca smiled as she took the book. "You're welcome," she said. "I hope you like it." She then turned her attention to the space beside the basement door, where Eva had begun to struggle with the stuck zipper on her bag, trying to pack the last few of her things.

"Do you two have a show tonight?" Bea questioned, her gaze flicking over toward Kennedy just as Eva managed to force the zipper open and slip her shoes into the bag. "Maybe I'll come watch."

"Not me," Kennedy said with a shake of her head. "Eva does. But you should come anyway."
Bea grinned. "Then I can sit with you and watch," she said. "I never get to actually sit watch shows with you. You're always in them."
Hugo looked up from where he had settled himself at the kitchen counter. "Do it!" he chirped, obviously excited by the idea.

(Sorry it's not great. I lost my job last week and my muse has been really low.)
 
As the group's attention shifted away from her and back to Eva and her show tonight, Juliette took the opportunity to slip upstairs and put the book on her dresser with the last book in the series that she had been reading. She noticed how new it looked compared to Jupiter's copy and worried about being the one to have to wrinkle the spine.The last time she'd kept a book in her room, her father had ripped it up in a fit of rage and she had to search the couch cushions for lost change to pay the library fee. She missed the library and its quiet safety. There were never any expectations on her there except the rule to stay quiet. She was always good at that though.
She could keep everything locked up and keep everything down. She wanted to figure out how she would make or find presents for everyone but she felt she was expected downstairs. Just not what was expected of her. She hadn't been asked if she was going to the Eva's show today yet, but she figured if everyone else was going, they wouldn't trust her to stay here alone. Her shoulders were sore from the tension she was always holding there, especially today. She went back downstairs after another few minutes and sort of hovered by the kitchen counter, making little braids in her hair with swift but nervous fingers.

(oh no I'm so sorry! no hey take your time, no pressure. feel free to timeskip if you want or not if you don't. no rush on responding. I hope things get better for you soon <3)
 
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A few hours later, Eva sat at her vanity in the bedroom, wearing an old flannel several sizes too big for her, and her hair pulled back into a ponytail to keep it out of her face. Her makeup case sat on the edge of the table, though it held next to nothing, as most of her makeup lay scattered about the table before her. Ronan sat perched on the edge of the bed, watching her finish her eye makeup with interest, though she wasn't quite sure just how long he had been there. If he'd been watching the entire time she'd been doing her makeup, then he'd been there for at least a couple of hours. He often sat and watched her do her makeup, and as long as he was relatively quiet and didn't interrupt her too often, she didn't mind his presence.

Her shirt was covered in smudges of makeup by now, part of it fallout from what she'd brushed off her face and part of it smudges from what she'd wiped off a brush, or her fingers, or anything else. Not that she cared. The shirt's only purpose was to keep her makeup from falling somewhere she didn't want it. It was far too big for her to wear for any other reason.

Eva turned to rummage through her makeup case, an exasperated huff escaping her lips before she turned back to look over her shoulder at Ronan. "Could you run downstairs and see if you can find my eyelashes? I think I left the 301's in the bowl by the door last time we went out. Probably just pulled them off and passed out. I need to put my eyelashes on and then we can go. My lips aren't done but the rest of my face is finished. I can finish up at the bar."

Ronan nodded and scrambled down the stairs, skidding to a stop at the bottom. The eyelashes were where Eva had said they would be, and Ronan grabbed the pairs from the bowl before turning to Kennedy. "Eva says she's almost ready to go," he said, partly to Kennedy and partly to the rest of the room,.
 
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Everything had gone relatively smoothly with her grandmother while she was here. She didn't try to start any heavy conversations, really, but Juliette still felt like she was walking on eggshells most of the time. She was growing increasingly frustrated with herself and her mounting paranoia so she had gathered her courage and decided to read the book she was given, curled up in the corner by the armrest of the large couch in the main living room. She had to read the same page more than once sometimes because every movement and sound near her was apparently a potential threat to her brain. She grit her teeth a lot and her facial expression looked unintentionally irritated.

That's where she was when Ronan walked in from upstairs and her eyes snapped up to look at him over the pages of her book. She was just getting to another good part too!
"Eva says she's almost ready to go," he said, partly to Kennedy and partly to the rest of the room,.
Juliette felt like she'd swallowed an ice pack. She had nearly forgotten about the performance Eva had tonight, waiting on someone to give her instructions on what they wanted from her. Her eyes flitted across the room to each of the family members around her and waited just a few more seconds for a commanding voice to tell her what to do. No one did. Her breaths came quicker now, but she wasn't sure if that was out of anger or fear and she was more angry with herself than anything. "Are you bringing me with you or am I to stay here?" she asked, almost dizzy with the sudden rush of recklessness. Her volume was at a normal speaking level, but it was the loudest Juliette had said anything since she arrived. She hadn't moved from her spot, but her body was tense and she wondered if this could be a viable strategy for figuring out her boundaries. If she just kept speaking out of term with no regard for her own safety or the alarm bells clanging relentlessly in her head, maybe one of these days someone would slam her into a wall and she would finally be able to gauge a sense of the limits around here.
 
Ronan had vanished back up the stairs before anybody could respond to him, and Kennedy turned back to look at Juliette as she spoke, the loudest the girl had said anything since her arrival a few days earlier. Kennedy opened her mouth to respond, but Jupiter beat her to it, speaking up from where they were settled in a chair in the corner of the living room.

"You should come with us," they said. "You might have fun. Everyone's really nice. And you won't be by yourself. One of us will stick with you. I will, specifically, if you want."

At that moment, Eva descended the staircase, her having been curled into loose waves, and her makeup fully done, save for a few smaller details she could finish at the bar. She looked across the room at Juliette, fiddling with the sleeves on her oversized shirt as she did. "You don't have to come," Eva told her. "But you never know, you might enjoy yourself."
 
Jupiter's response made her think they might be angry with her if she didn't go. That she "should" go meant she didnt really have a choice. She memorized what page she was on, then closed her new book and lowered her gaze while she heard someone in heels descending the staircase. Eva appeared, messing with her sleeves and amending Jupiter's suggestion. Juliette hesitated, then asked, "Would I be by myself if I stayed here?"

She really wondered if it would it be more dangerous to go someplace with alcohol where she didnt have hiding places or here with just one other person? The thought of the second scenario made her chest feel tight. No matter how high or drunk her father ever was, he'd never hurt her in public.
Any normal young girl asking if she would be left alone may look afraid that the answer was yes. Juliette worried that the answer would be no.
 
"Probably," Kennedy said. "Unless somebody wants to stay here. You can stay here if you want to. You don't have to come with us if you don't want to." She knew that Juliette would probably not mind being left alone, but a part of her still felt bad about the idea of leaving her niece at home on her own. "I can stay with you if you want me to." She wondered if Eva would be fine if she didn't go. Usually she was the one in charge of helping Eva with whatever she needed during the show, but Jupiter had been more than enough times. Maybe they would be fine to do it for her.
 
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Juliette's face screwed up in frustration, but she kept her gaze on the patterns on her mismatched socks. She wasn't angry at them, just that she had to make this decision. She didn't know the right answer and she didn't even know what she wanted in this case. It was like choosing the lesser of two evils when she had always been told what to do. And Eva was all dressed up too. She remembered the pictures on the wall with everyone in stage makeup and she was lying to herself if she wasn't curious about what this family-wide hobby was about. Besides, she couldn't stay cooped up in this house forever, she was already driving herself insane wondering when things would go wrong in here. Sure, she'd never been to a bar, but that also meant nothing bad had happened to her in one. Juliette huffed and stood. "Nevermind, I'll go with you. Is there something specific I should wear? Is it...upscale..or something?" she asked, trying to figure out a presentable outfit from her meager clothing options, holding her book close to her chest.
 
Kennedy smiled and shook her head when Juliette asked if there was anything special she should wear. "You can go the way you are," she said, stepping sideways to let Eva slip past her as she took her bag out to the car. "Nobody will mind. But you can change if you want to. Nobody's usually really dressed up unless they're performing."

She watched Juliette close her book, and then wondered if the bar might be too overwhelming for her. "You can bring your book with you," she suggested. "If you decide you'd rather be left alone you could always sit in the dressing room and read."
 
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"You can go the way you are," she said, stepping sideways to let Eva slip past her as she took her bag out to the car. "Nobody will mind. But you can change if you want to. Nobody's usually really dressed up unless they're performing."
Juliette nodded and started to head towards the stairs to grab her shoes, but stopped when Kennedy spoke again.
"You can bring your book with you," she suggested. "If you decide you'd rather be left alone you could always sit in the dressing room and read."
"Okay," she nodded, grateful for the option. She made a mental note to find the dressing room when they got there, so she knew where it would be if she needed it. Then she climbed up to the guest room and got her shoes on before joining everyone else who wanted to go in the car to Eva's performance. She spent the car ride fiddling with the edges of her new book's pages and trying to calm her racing thoughts so that when she got there, she would hopefully behave like a functioning human being and not a terrified squirrel.
 
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They arrived at the bar and Eva was the first one out, with Jupiter grabbing her bag from the trunk and scampering after her into the bar. Ronan and Hugo followed close behind them with Bea, Kennedy waiting to go in with Juliette.

Inside, Eva gave a small wave of acknowledgement to the bartender and then paused at the top of the basement staircase. She could hear the tinny sound of music playing from someone's phone, so someone had to be down there getting ready. She slipped through the doorway and down the staircase, grinning as she caught sight of Cherie in an old desk chair, only half dressed and leaning forward to fix her makeup in the mirror. The man in front of the mirror was taller than Eva herself was by a couple of inches, heavily tattooed down his arms and across his bare chest. In the right light, you could see the scars that were smattered across the younger drag queen, most of them carefully hidden by the tattoos.

Cherie looked up before Eva could say anything, and sprang up to give Eva a tight hug. "Hi!" she chirped. "You look nice."
Eva gave Cherie a suspicious look. "A compliment from you before the end of the night? I'm shocked."
"Just don't tell anybody I'm being kind," Cherie answered with a smirk. "I tolerate your presence at best."

"I see you've brought the possum wig," Eva teased giving Cherie a light shove and, gesturing to the silver tangled wig atop the pile of Cherie's things. Cherie glared at her before leaning down to inspect her makeup in the mirror. "It needs. Brushed," she stated flatly. "And you look like a lady lumberjack, you can't talk about my wigs."
"I was thinking farmer," Kennedy said, rounding the corner as she came after down the stairs after Eva. "But I suppose lumberjack could work." Kennedy smirked and reached out to give Cherie a hug.

Eva rolled her eyes and drifted past them into the smaller side room. "I'm going to get changed," she said, pulling her bag after her and vanishing around the corner.
"What needs brushed?" Jupiter asked, slipping past Cherie. "I'll do it." They grabbed the wig and took to brushing it out, perching on the edge of a stool off to the side of the room.

"Thank you, doll," Cherie said, her attention turning back to the mirror again. "I wish my drag children were half as useful. They'll probably both end up being late again, otherwise I'd have Lita do it. Not that she'd do it well." Her words, although seemingly harsh, held a hint of affection and amusement. "Lita still can't pin her wigs on right, and that's why she's just helping with Lucy's number instead of having her own."

"Sal's around someplace, though," she added. "I think he went to get a drink, but every time he goes to the bar he just ends up talking to Angelo for thirty years." She grinned as Hugo and Ronan slipped into the large room behind Kennedy.
 
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Juliette had to work to keep calm as the car rolled to a stop and everyone excluding her aunt and grandmother exited the car. She only hesitated a moment before following after them, briefly catching a whiff of smoke and alcohol before she coughed and decided to breathe through her mouth instead. Kennedy greeted the bartender before she headed down a narrow staircase and Juliette tentatively followed with the sound of music from a cell phone and friendly conversation getting louder with every step down. Kennedy integrated herself into the dialogue easily and gave a hug to the person with the heavy makeup while Juliette tried to find a spot in the room where she could stand without getting in anyone's way. Then Eva left, but Juliette didn't see where because her eyes had ended up stuck to the tattooed man half dressed in front of his mirror.

The dark designs all across his skin conjured similar images of men that had visited her father often, usually to buy drugs,...sometimes other things. Juliette clenched her firsts around the book she was holding, forcing herself back into the present before she could freak out. Breathe. It's just a person, she thought, but her thoughts spoke back: danger!danger!danger! She shook her head and her eyes caught something different. Marks that weren't tattoos, but raised...scars. They were hidden well, but when the guy turned his wrist or arm a certain way in front of the vanity, she could see their edges, probably because she had tried before to hide her own with makeup and could never get them to disappear quite right. Instead she wore long sleeves like the shirt she wore tonight, gray and a little small on her.
Finally she could pull her gaze away when her eyes flicked toward the movement of Ronan and Hugo heading someplace else. Juliette took that opportunity to escape and followed them out. She didn't know where she was headed, but with Hugo's nervous tendencies, she hoped it was someplace they would both find more comfortable.
 
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(The man is Cherie, just without her wig. reading it again I probably didn’t make it quite as clear as I should have)

Ronan trotted to the other side of the room with his brother, taking a seat on one of the old bar stools that were pushed against the wall. He could still see the others, but thought it best to stay out of the way. Cherie nudged him gently as he passed, and he stopped to hug her before sitting down.

Cherie paused as she caught sight of Juliette. “Well, hello,” she greeted with a friendly grin. “You’re Kennedy’s neice, If I’m remembering right. Juliette? It’s nice to finally meet you. You can call me Cherie. Most everyone else here does.”

She didn’t continue to interrogate Juliette, and Kennedy suspected that she could sense the girl’s nervousness. She glanced back towards the mirror and picked up a brush again, smoothing out some small imperfection in her eye makeup.

After a few moments more, Eva stepped back into the room again. Her dress was a dark turquoise, accented with small rhinestones in several places. Over top, she wore a corset in a slightly darker shade. It had been laced in the back, but not nearly as tightly as Eva wanted it. She had changed her shoes to the ones she had packed earlier in the day, and she gave a small smile as she came into view. "Well? she asked. "How do I look?"

"Terrible," Cherie said, hardly glancing up from the pile of her things she had been rummaging through. Eva rolled her eyes and grabbed the nearest thing to her, which happened to be what Cherie used to fill her bra--a ball made of cut nylon tights that Cherie had filled with rice.
"Shut up and go get dressed," Eva said, rolling her eyes and tossing the ball towards Cherie, who caught it and tucked it into her bra. Cherie took her wig from Jupiter and drifted past Eva to slip into the same room that Eva had just left, pausing as she passed to put an arm around Eva's waist and give her a tight squeeze, a teasing glint still in her eyes.

"Ignore her," Kennedy said as Eva reached her. "I for one, think you look ethereal. Here." She turned Eva around and fiddled with the ribbons on the corset before pulling them taut. "How's that?"
"Tighter," Eva told her.
"You won't be able to breathe if she goes any tighter," Ronan piped up from where he sat next to Hugo.
"I'll be fine," Eva said, straightening up as Kennedy continued to tighten the corset. Kennedy looked to Ronan and rolled her eyes, and the boy snickered, ducking to hide his face from Eva.
 
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Juliette paused mid-step when she realized they weren't leaving the room at all; they were headed farther away from the only exit she knew of. Her breath caught in her throat as Ronan stopped to hug him. Clearly they trust him. Calm the hell down. she tried to convince herself she was fine and there was nothing to be afraid of, but then he turned to her and she froze, stopped breathing. It didn't help that her ribs were pressing hard against the cover of the book she gripped still tighter to her chest. She couldn't meet his eyes.
Cherie paused as she caught sight of Juliette. “Well, hello,” she greeted with a friendly grin. “You’re Kennedy’s niece, If I’m remembering right. Juliette? It’s nice to finally meet you. You can call me Cherie. Most everyone else here does.”
She nodded once, stiffly, and found she was only able to move again when he turned away from her and back to the mirror. Juliette had to remind herself to breathe while she retreated back toward the staircase. Her knees were too shaky to climb them so she just sat on the bottom step, out of view of most of the room and pretended to read her book, even though it was a bit too dark in that area to read in very well.
Despite how her sore ribs protested, she couldn't stop silently hyperventilating. Her fingers hurt from gripping her book so hard for so long but she couldn't move them, her brain too occupied with tangling past memories with current events for her to stop. She needed something to look at or sketch or anything to distract herself before this escalated ridiculously, but she just couldn't stop shaking, eyes wide and searching the open page and the surrounding area for something to latch onto.

Then Eva returned. Dressed in a flowy blue dress that Juliette desperately wanted to draw as the older woman's movements affected the fabric and the shimmer of the rhinestones caught the light. Juliette kept her eyes stuck on it, doing her best to stay in the present at all costs. She tuned out as much of the rest as she could, staring as she listed details in her head: the shifting of the skirt, the contrast of the blues, the breeze as she walked and how it moved the sleeves.
"Tighter," Eva told her.
"You won't be able to breathe if she goes any tighter," Ronan piped up from where he sat next to Hugo.
"I'll be fine," Eva said, straightening up as Kennedy continued to tighten the corset.
That would make two of us who can't breathe, she thought, but that meant she was more aware of herself now and could slowly unclench her fingers and focus hard on breathing slower.
 
"She'll be fine," a rough voice echoed from the stairwell. "I haven't seen her pass out yet." A dark haired man rounded the corner, a glass of some type of alcohol in his hand. He was tall, and the boots with heels several inches high made him look even more large and imposing than he already was. His makeup was harsher and darker than Eva's was and more androgynous than outright feminine, and the same went for his clothing. He smiled when he caught sight of Eva, Kennedy stepping back as she finished tightening the corset.

"Hey, Sal," Eva greeted as the man reached her. Sal paused and leaned down to peck Eva on the cheek.
"Hello, Flower," he said softly, using the nickname he had given her several years before. He set his drink down and turned to greet Kennedy and the others before his gaze came to rest on Juliette. He paused to look at her for a moment, offering her a small smile before falling in beside Eva and leaning forward to examine his face in the mirror.

Cherie returned from the dressing room fully dressed, her face lighting up when she saw Sal. She bounded forward to greet him and Sal caught her in a tight hug.
"Hey!" he greeted, grinning at the younger performer. "You look nice. I like that dress."

"Thanks!" Cherie chirped, returning to her things off to the side of the room and rummaging through the bag before producing a torch and a small lighter. She flicked the lighter a couple of times before pocketing it and spun the torch between her fingers as she headed towards the staircase. "I'm going upstairs," she said. "Let me know if Thing 1 and Thing 2 show up."

“Please don’t set my bar on fire,” Eva said as Cherie drifted past her.
“No promises!” Cherie called as she headed to up the stairs.

Eva rolled her eyes and Sal gave her a reassuring nudge. “Don’t worry,” he said. “Marshall’s upstairs running sound, and Angelo's behind the bar.. They’ll make sure she doesn’t torch the place. Besides, she’s not the one who recently smashed a limb.”

Eva ignored the comment about her injured leg. “It just makes me nervous,” she said with a shrug. “I know she knows what she’s doing, but every time I have to watch her fucking around with fire I get anxious.”

Sal smirked and put his arm around her, but didn’t say anything else, having returned to adding glitter into his beard.

"Hurry up!" a voice hissed from the top of the stairs. "We're late!"
Lucy appeared at the bottom of the stairs, dressed and ready, but looking overwhelmed. Lita followed just behind her, looking a bit less disheveled but still reaching up every few seconds to try and adjust her wig that hadn't properly been pinned on.

"Hey y'all," Lita greeted. Her eyes flicked to Juliette for a moment before she bounced over to the mirror. "Hi extra person whose name I don't know!"
"Juliette," Kennedy said. "My niece."
Lita gave a small wave and returned to messing with her wig.

Lucy scrambled over to the mirror. "Sorry we're late."
"About time," Kennedy said. "You two are supposed to go first. Cherie is pretty miffed."
"She'll be a lot more miffed if your wig falls off," Eva said to Lita, who was still struggling with her wig. "Come here."

Eva pulled Lita over to her and set to work adjusting her wig. Ronan looked toward Juliette and offered her a small smile. "We can head upstairs if you want," he told her. "Bea's up there, and the show will be starting soon. Besides," he added, glancing over towards Eva, who was still trying to pin on Lita's wig. "I think these guys could use the extra space."
 
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And then someone descended the stairwell. Of course. The gruff man's voice made her tense up again, and curl ever smaller to the side of the step so he could pass into the room without having to step around her. Juliette's eyes followed his heels as he walked in to greet Eva and Kennedy before they turned toward her. Her breath hitched. He smiled. And then thankfully turned away again. Juliette let out a breath of relief, but too quickly gulped another breath in. She couldn't seem to self-regulate, especially with all of the loud interruptions.

And people who kept going up and down the stairs past her. But upstairs was sounding louder every minute. So she was trapped. The one with all of the tattoos passed her first, with a lighter and she ducked her head. Then two more came down and one of them acknowledged her.
"Hi extra person whose name I don't know!"
"Juliette," Kennedy said. "My niece."
Lita gave a small wave and returned to messing with her wig.
She waved back with a shaky hand as her stomach knotted. She should have introduced herself. Her lungs felt like they were burning in her chest behind sore ribs. Why couldn't she just get it together?! She agreed to come! halfway through internally berating herself, another pair of shoes approached. She tensed, then looked up as Ronan spoke.
"We can head upstairs if you want," he told her. "Bea's up there, and the show will be starting soon. Besides," he added, glancing over towards Eva, who was still trying to pin on Lita's wig. "I think these guys could use the extra space."
"Sorry," she mumbled for taking up too much space. She tried to stand up, but barely got off of the stair before having to try again on shaky knees. She clutched her book with white knuckles as she shook her head to try and rid herself of dizziness before climbing the stairs as quietly as she could manage.
 
Jupiter stood up and made their way towards the stairs, having heard Ronan speak. They gave Juliette a gentle nudge as they passed her. "Nothing to be sorry for," they told her. Ronan followed after Jupiter with Hugo trailing a few feet behind. Ronan bounced past the bar and over to where Bea sat, sitting down at the table next to her, joined shortly after by Eva and Kennedy. Ronan straightened up as the music began and Cherie strode out onto the stage. The lights, which had dimmed only moments before, illuminated the stage once more.

Show a little more,
Show a little less,
Add a little smoke,
Welcome to Burlesque...


Cherie's movements were slow and dramatic. At the word "smoke" she uncurled her clenched fist and blew slightly, sending a smattering of gold glitter across the stage and the few people closest to it. The crowd burst out into a mix of laughter and cheers. She continued through the song, taking tips as they were handed to her. She stepped up onto a row of mostly empty tables from the stage at one point, strutting across them and leaning down to peck one of the girls who had tipped her on the cheek.

Towards the middle of the song, the lyrics stopped and Cherie took the torch from where it lay on the side of the stage and produced the lighter from her pocket. She lit the torch, and Eva tensed slightly where she sat. It always made her nervous. Cherie spun the torch once before leaning backwards and putting the lit end of the torch into her mouth, resulting in cheers and applause from the crowd. Exhaling, a small puff of fire burst from Cherie's lips into the air, where it dissipated after a moment or two.

The crowd roared as the flame split the air, and Cherie dropped the lit torch into a small bucket of water that waited behind her. The torch hissed as the fire was snuffed out and the lyrics continued, and Cherie continued dramatically through the song. Her movements slowed slightly as the song neared it's ending, and at the last use of the word "smoke" tossed something out onto the stage, which emitted a light pop and a light screen of smoke as Cherie gave a final dramatic spin as the song came to its end.

The crowd erupted into a final bout of cheers, and Cherie went for the microphone. "Hello, ladies and germs!" she greeted. "How's everybody doing?"
The crowd cheered again, and Cherie opened her mouth to speak before being cut off by someone near the back cheering several seconds too late.
"You're a bit late, darling," she laughed, a teasing glint in her eyes.

(i'm aliveeee!)
 
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upiter stood up and made their way towards the stairs, having heard Ronan speak. They gave Juliette a gentle nudge as they passed her. "Nothing to be sorry for," they told her. Ronan followed after Jupiter with Hugo trailing a few feet behind.
Juliette instinctively flinched away from the touch, then winced at the consequential shame for having not recognized it wasn't meant to be harmful. goddamnit pull yourself together, stupid. She clenched her teeth and followed them all out toward a table with many unfilled seats and Bea. She tried to keep her eyes focused on the destination instead of all the steps in between, but an uncontrollable drive to scan the room for threats didn't let her.

The crowd itself was one of them, but all of the minutiae within it caught on the tangled barbed wire of her mind anyway. Arms covered in tattoos, the clink of glassware, and the smell of alcohol was everywhere. She could barely hear what the people around her were saying as she hunched forward in her seat and her heartbeat pounded loud in her ears.
She tried to straighten up and look less like a frantic bunny when Kennedy and Eva sat down, but then the lights dimmed further and the stage lit up. Her chin snapped up to stare at Cherie. Good. something to watch. Watch. She ignored her throbbing ribcage and fluttering lungs. Ignored her trembling fingers and tensed shoulders. They could do what they wanted. And they did, they stayed just as they were, but her attention was on the lights, the dress, the dance.

Half the song passed. Juliette felt a wishful urge to draw something from real life for once.

But then the fire started.
The torch was lit from a small Bic lighter. She could tell the brand from this far away. And suddenly she was caged in a body full of adrenaline. Run. Cherie pulled the fire toward her lips. Juliette was too far away to actually smell the smoke, but she remembered it. She knows that smell. Swears its still stuck in her hair. Run.
Her eyes scanned for exits. Bathroom? Can't see one. Downstairs? Dead end.
Red Exit sign. As the crowd began to roar around her, Juliette flew out her her seat so fast, she left her book askew on the table. Before she knew it she was outside. And the smell of smoke followed. So she kept running. She didn't even know where she was going except Away.

(me tooooo!)
 
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Kennedy sprang up to follow after Juliette. Eva stood up too, but Kennedy gently pushed her back down into her seat. "Stay and watch," she told her. "It's almost your turn. Let me talk to her." Bea had gotten up to follow too, but Kennedy decided not to try and make her stay. She wouldn't. Bea always did what she wanted. Juliette ran for the exit and Kennedy followed as quickly as she could, struggling to not lose sight of her niece.

Juliette barreled blindly toward the street, and Kennedy reached out and yanked her backward. Perhaps a bit too hard, but she'd rather not see her niece splattered all over the road. "Juliette!" she barked. She exhaled and her voice softened. "It's all right," she said gently, glancing back over her shoulder toward the bar. "It's done. The place is still standing, I promise. Nobody's going to hurt you."
 
Juliette ran and ran and panted, arms pumping, legs flying so far forward she could barely stay upright. Terrified and unable to stop despite the pain radiating from her ribs and burning her lungs. Her hair was in her face, so she kept her eyes down on the asphalt beneath her too-small shoes. She was being chased, by loud footsteps and horrible memories alike.
Until she was suddenly yanked backward by her elbow, still yellowed by a healing bruise. Juliette yelped and stumbled away, eyes wide with fear trying to blink away the dark spots in her vision from the running and the headlights flashing by. She instinctively flinched back and pulled her arms up to cover her head, too disoriented to know whether this was a nightmare, a memory, or real.
"It's done. The place is still standing, I promise. Nobody's going to hurt you."
Lies. Always a lie. She whimpered, eyes still shut tight, bracing for the pain and trying to stop her knees from wobbling so much. If she fell, that's it. The kicking starts. And her ribs were already in enough pain from breathing so hard like this, but she couldn't stop. Like she couldn't get enough oxygen.
 
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