False Accusations

[SacredWarrior]

Have you or anyone you know been a victim of a false accusation? How did it affect you and what was the outcome?

Also what do you think should happen to people who falsely accuse others?

While I haven't been the victim of a false accusation, a family member of mine has.

He was my uncle and was falsely accused of rape when in actuality, the woman he slept with was married and got caught cheating by her husband. He wound up in prison for nearly 20 years and I never actually met him until I was a teenager. We became close but sadly he died in 2014 due to diabetes.

I think people who falsely accuse others of serious crimes such as rape or murder should be heavily punished and prosecuted.

 

[ᴛᴏᴄᴋᴀ]

I have a second degree assault charge because I was accused of assaulting my old neighbor, when in fact she was the one who assaulted my daughter. Her and our other neighbors all lied and said I went into her yard and attacked her. The truth of it was, she chased my daughter down, and I jumped in the middle of it and pushed her away and kept her from hitting my daughter. The DA stetted my charges, and dismissed them once I moved away from her. Her charges are still stetted, and the DA assured me that if she gets into any trouble, they'll bring our charges along with new charges up. Still pissed me off though. Went my whole life not getting into trouble, and I ended up in trouble for defending my daughter. If I hadn't jumped in the middle of it and let the stupid bitch hit her, I probably would have been charged with some kind of neglect. =/

 

[SacredWarrior]

I have a second degree assault charge because I was accused of assaulting my old neighbor, when in fact she was the one who assaulted my daughter. Her and our other neighbors all lied and said I went into her yard and attacked her. The truth of it was, she chased my daughter down, and I jumped in the middle of it and pushed her away and kept her from hitting my daughter. The DA stetted my charges, and dismissed them once I moved away from her. Her charges are still stetted, and the DA assured me that if she gets into any trouble, they'll bring our charges along with new charges up. Still pissed me off though. Went my whole life not getting into trouble, and I ended up in trouble for defending my daughter. If I hadn't jumped in the middle of it and let the stupid bitch hit her, I probably would have been charged with some kind of neglect. =/

If I had a kid, I would've punched that woman's lights out and took the charge anyways.

 

[ᴛᴏᴄᴋᴀ]

If I had put my hands on her, I would have bashed her head into the sidewalk. I wanted to kill her, and I'm not a violent person at all. It took everything I had not to beat the shit out of her, but I had my daughter to think about, and she was a mess.

 

[SacredWarrior]

If I had put my hands on her, I would have bashed her head into the sidewalk. I wanted to kill her, and I'm not a violent person at all. It took everything I had not to beat the shit out of her, but I had my daughter to think about, and she was a mess.

It would've been justified at least :/ Who knows what that crazy bitch could've done to your daughter? I hope she wasn't traumatized D:

 

[Drakel]

This thread is going to end OH SO WELL!

That said... ANY accusation should be subject to investigation and people should be skeptical about them before ever believing them. Proof and evidence are key importance and should be viewed highly. As for Rape, it is a very, very difficult thing because women and men who were raped tend to rarely ever go to the police directly after it happens and rather keep said event a secret, and for relatively good reason. Because of this detail the subject of rape becomes a "He said/she said" case rather than one with evidence and the chances of either an innocent person going to prison, or a rape victim getting no justice is 50/50.

That said, I think it should be of highest importance to teach men that they shouldn't be afraid of using the justice system if they're raped and they they're no less off a man if they were raped. And I think we need to teach women and men that if they were ever raped, they need to go to the police directly after so evidence could be gained and for it to help make a case against the said rapist through the judicial system.

As for the accusations themselves, I agree that if someone purposefully makes any false accusation in attempt to harm the lives of others, they should be forced to pay for the permanent damages that was placed onto said person. False accusations of rape can and has ruined lives, even when they're proven false. For such, a penalty should be placed for purposefully trying to harm said person with malicious intent.

 

[Gwazi Magnum]

On anything warranting a criminal charge? No.
Though I'm outspoken enough I won't be surprised if someone tries it some day.

In regards to more personal matters?

It happens time to time, a lot more often when I was younger back when adults felt they had the authority to give me a lecture for 'misbehaving' and anything I said back was simply disrespecting authority. This was usually minor stuff like "who started the fight with your sister?" or "you promised to do X!".

But during Grades 3-5 it sometimes got more serious, kids would pick fights and a number of teachers would be too lazy to investigate the matter. Found it far easier to label me as the trouble starter and leave it at that. Thankfully though, the reason I was at that current school was cause we followed the Principal from my earlier school (cause he let me get Autism Therapy at school when most wouldn't) so he knew me well enough to know I wasn't responsible for the things other teachers were accusing me of doing.

 

[Bomb]

Not crime related, but was once accused of looking at another classmate's answer on a test in middle school. Thing is I already turned in my test, and was waiting got the time to be up so was reading something. Ended up getting my score cut in half because of that.

I absolutely hate middle school.

 

[Grothnor]

Hoo boy do I have a story.

So, it's my friend's 18th birthday and for his birthday he wants to play laser tag. I'm hanging out with three friends (including birthday boy) and we go to the laser tag place and get set up against a group of kids who were half our height and age. Naturally, we completely smoked them in all three rounds, being bigger, faster, more accurate and holding a firmer grasp of the rules. After we end one game and before we get to go again, one of the people working at the place asks me if I took my hands off the gun (the rules said I was supposed to keep both hands on the laser gun at all times, but nobody was really paying attention to that rule). I said yes, and they pulled me aside. Soon some mall/arcade cops arrive and start asking me whether or not I touched one of the kids inappropriately.

I was completely shocked by the allegations. One of my friends got in the cops' faces and started yelling about how his dad was a cop and generally threatening them. Me and one of my other friends had to talk him down from doing something utterly stupid. The cops kept pressing me for a confession, saying stuff like "we're gonna check the camera footage, is there anything you want to say before we do". My dad was called and he came for moral support, and the cops finally relented when I said that I didn't even know who was accusing me. They said they'd file a report and get back to me if they need anything (fortunately they didn't). My theory back then (and the explanation I offered) was that I accidentally bumped into someone and they interpreted it as a 'bad touch', which was probable considering how many little kids were running around in there. My friend's theory was that one of the kids, pissed at losing so horribly, cried wolf, and that I, being the most visually distinctive, both overweight and bearded, was the easiest target to identify.

We ended up heading home after that in an uncomfortable silence.

[spoili]And would you believe that was my second run in with the cops before I turned 18?[/spoili]

 

[Brovo]

Have you or anyone you know been a victim of a false accusation? How did it affect you and what was the outcome?

Also what do you think should happen to people who falsely accuse others?

Real talk? I've had some people make some pretty absurd statements about my character behind my back here on Iwaku. Thankfully I've been getting some of it cleared up, but unfortunately, I've been subject to rumours as wide and wild as being incapable of feeling emotions, to being openly violent and cruel.

In my past? I was threatened to be accused of rape by a crazy chick in high school. The story behind that is there was this one woman who looked sad and lonely, so I tried to make her feel better. She reacted by immediately latching to my arm. Being as emotionally insecure as I was, I tried to take things slowly so I could develop things over time and figure out who she was. (Seriously she tried to make out with me the same day I was kind to her. I wasn't comfortable with that. I take time to get to know people before I start to really care like that.) As a result, she started sending me texts threatening that she would commit suicide. Over 500 messages threatening suicide later (no, really) she threatened that she would fake a rape accusation about me.

Thankfully, I wasn't the only guy she was doing this to, so she targeted someone else and cried out rape. That guy was terminated from his workplace. As far as I'm aware, it never actually went to court, but the mere accusation was enough to destroy his relationship with his employer.

It's why I tend to be so skeptical and cautious toward the "listen and believe" crowd. Listen and believe who, exactly? The victim? Do you know who the victim is? Where's your evidence? What the hell do you mean I'm an asshole for asking for evidence for a capital offense that can ruin someone's entire life?

It's called the prosecution and the defense, not the perpetrator and the victim. Get that through your fucking skulls. Why the hell do you want to bring back the dark ages of witch hunts? All that's going to do is further the divide between men and women, by making one group absolutely terrified of the other's ability to instantly ruin their lives with a fucking catch phrase.

I'm all for empathy. If someone's in obvious suffering, help them. That's why we have shelters, that's why we should continue supporting and expanding shelter networks. Shelters don't ask questions (or at least they shouldn't), because the only thing they're doing is providing an out for people who need it.

It's the criminal court system that needs to neither believe nor disbelieve your claims; merely verify. As for how fair or unfair it is? Someone could slit my throat tomorrow in order to steal my wallet and the ten bucks of change I keep in it. Unless his DNA is already in a criminal database, or there's a witness to see it, the likelihood he's ever going to be caught for that crime is pretty much zero. All they'll have is the cadaver that can't speak.

Life isn't fair.

Get over that and start thinking of solutions to problems like this without resorting to destroying the very fabric of our justice system. Thanks.

 

[Greenie]

I've known a victim of false accusation. Not a fun thing, and it's cost him his four kids x.x He's fighting to get them back though. If there's any justice in the world, it'll happen. And if not, let's hope karma really is a bitch.

 

[Gwazi Magnum]

My theory back then (and the explanation I offered) was that I accidentally bumped into someone and they interpreted it as a 'bad touch', which was probable considering how many little kids were running around in there.

Possible, some parents are really eager to protect their 'precious angel' even if there's nothing to protect them from.

My friend's theory was that one of the kids, pissed at losing so horribly, cried wolf, and that I, being the most visually distinctive, both overweight and bearded, was the easiest target to identify.

But as someone who graduated from ECE (Early Childhood Education) this is my guess. Some children, just like adults don't have much sense of sympathy or compassion. This get's compounded by children often not being developed enough to let go of the concept of "Self is most important" and childhood in general being someone's natural time of having to learn what's right, what's wrong and why. So there's a chance they didn't recognize the ramifications of such an accusation.

[spoili]And would you believe that was my second run in with the cops before I turned 18?[/spoili]

... Is this second story shareable, or private?

 

[Windsong]

Falsely accused of molesting a minor once when I was 19.

My WoW chat log and screenshots I took that raid night literally saved my skin.

That shit is terrifying as a man. Even if it doesn't stick it can ruin our lives.

 

[Grothnor]

... Is this second story shareable, or private?

Shareable, just irrelevant to the current conversation. Short version: underage drinking.

 

[ᴛᴏᴄᴋᴀ]

Real talk? I've had some people make some pretty absurd statements about my character behind my back here on Iwaku. Thankfully I've been getting some of it cleared up, but unfortunately, I've been subject to rumours as wide and wild as being incapable of feeling emotions, to being openly violent and cruel.

In my past? I was threatened to be accused of rape by a crazy chick in high school. The story behind that is there was this one woman who looked sad and lonely, so I tried to make her feel better. She reacted by immediately latching to my arm. Being as emotionally insecure as I was, I tried to take things slowly so I could develop things over time and figure out who she was. (Seriously she tried to make out with me the same day I was kind to her. I wasn't comfortable with that. I take time to get to know people before I start to really care like that.) As a result, she started sending me texts threatening that she would commit suicide. Over 500 messages threatening suicide later (no, really) she threatened that she would fake a rape accusation about me.

Thankfully, I wasn't the only guy she was doing this to, so she targeted someone else and cried out rape. That guy was terminated from his workplace. As far as I'm aware, it never actually went to court, but the mere accusation was enough to destroy his relationship with his employer.

It's why I tend to be so skeptical and cautious toward the "listen and believe" crowd. Listen and believe who, exactly? The victim? Do you know who the victim is? Where's your evidence? What the hell do you mean I'm an asshole for asking for evidence for a capital offense that can ruin someone's entire life?

It's called the prosecution and the defense, not the perpetrator and the victim. Get that through your fucking skulls. Why the hell do you want to bring back the dark ages of witch hunts? All that's going to do is further the divide between men and women, by making one group absolutely terrified of the other's ability to instantly ruin their lives with a fucking catch phrase.

I'm all for empathy. If someone's in obvious suffering, help them. That's why we have shelters, that's why we should continue supporting and expanding shelter networks. Shelters don't ask questions (or at least they shouldn't), because the only thing they're doing is providing an out for people who need it.

It's the criminal court system that needs to neither believe nor disbelieve your claims; merely verify. As for how fair or unfair it is? Someone could slit my throat tomorrow in order to steal my wallet and the ten bucks of change I keep in it. Unless his DNA is already in a criminal database, or there's a witness to see it, the likelihood he's ever going to be caught for that crime is pretty much zero. All they'll have is the cadaver that can't speak.

Life isn't fair.

Get over that and start thinking of solutions to problems like this without resorting to destroying the very fabric of our justice system. Thanks.

I never did understand the point of telling someone you were going to fake accuse them. If you're going to lie about something like that you're already a shitty person. Making threats isn't going to make anyone stick around, especially if they've done nothing wrong.

Women are kind of dumb in that sense. If you really want to hurt a guy tell everyone he's got a one inch dick and he's a one pump chump, that'll hurt him a lot more (At least personally. Always hit the ego first.) Rape accusations, while not always easy to disprove, it can at least happen. Plus, you're not only ruining the guy's life, but you're making it harder on actual victims. And what's the point in it anyway? The feeling of revenge with something like that can't last that long, unless you have no heart at all. Eventually you'll start to feel guilty. Plus, Karma is a bitch. I wouldn't want to take the risk of what'll happen when she catches up.

 

[Brovo]

I never did understand the point of telling someone you were going to fake accuse them. If you're going to lie about something like that you're already a shitty person. Making threats isn't going to make anyone stick around, especially if they've done nothing wrong.

Women are kind of dumb in that sense. If you really want to hurt a guy tell everyone he's got a one inch dick and he's a one pump chump, that'll hurt him a lot more (At least personally. Always hit the ego first.) Rape accusations, while not always easy to disprove, it can at least happen. Plus, you're not only ruining the guy's life, but you're making it harder on actual victims. And what's the point in it anyway? The feeling of revenge with something like that can't last that long, unless you have no heart at all. Eventually you'll start to feel guilty. Plus, Karma is a bitch. I wouldn't want to take the risk of what'll happen when she catches up.

Cuz' desperation. Guys do it too. Hell, I'd say it's just human, no gender does it more or less. Desperate people will threaten each other to get what they want, especially when they've lost (or outright disregard) any of their logical faculties to embrace total, selfish madness.

It's easy to pity yourself. There's a certain sweet, but sickly ichor to it. To cripple yourself, and see the problems in everyone else. If you ever want to truly love someone, you have to get past your own self pity first, or it will constantly hold you back. You can't offer someone else a dance or take them on an adventure if you break your own legs and scream at the locals for refusing to carry you up the stairs.

So, I don't really hate that woman. I give her the one thing she gives herself.

Pity.

Anything else would be a waste of my time. You know?

EDIT

Hell, you're a parent. You know more than I all about having to get past what you want so your kids can get the right things they need in life. What am I doing, ranting like this.

 

[IntrusivePenDesperateSword]

If I find out there has been a false accusation about me (which I have yet to experience), I have a response prepared, a quote from a cartoon character by the name of Toby Determined. "Boy, you're little knees must be sore... from jumping to conclusions."

 

[Greenie]

I know people who jump to false accusations, even for small things. And honestly, it gets old very fast, especially when I know it's not true and try to get them to see the light. Apparently my flashlight isn't strong enough heh.

 

[Gwazi Magnum]

If only everyone had an open mind, and their first reaction to a false accusation was to actually look into it first rather than jump to conclusion. :/

I will say though, the fact so many people on this thread alone have stories of getting falsely accused (like, really serious ones that risk ruining lives. Not smaller stuff like mine) is an eye opener. I seriously though this was a once in blue moon incident that the Internet exploded.

 

[Brovo]

If only everyone had an open mind, and their first reaction to a false accusation was to actually look into it first rather than jump to conclusion. :/

I will say though, the fact so many people on this thread alone have stories of getting falsely accused (like, really serious ones that risk ruining lives. Not smaller stuff like mine) is an eye opener. I seriously though this was a once in blue moon incident that the Internet exploded.

Even if, say, one out of every hundred people you meet is totally fucking nutso, just how many people do you meet in a lifetime?

At some point in your life, by sheer statistical odds, you will be threatened, and discriminated against. Depending on where you live & the circumstances of your birth, perhaps more-so, perhaps less.