Adjule 15, 34 year of Wundel
I can not believe our luck so far, we have made it out of the Royal Research Facility unscathed to my utmost relief. Not only would I be sentanced as a traitor and executed Coaxoch would be taken back into the life of an experiment, once more given her lab name, #32H407M. Maybe there does exist some higher power than science that allowed us this miracle or maybe this is just the calm before the storm, only time will tell.
I know that she hates and distrusts me, she is right to feel like that, after all I'm partly to blame for her pain and very life, I deserve it and my only regret is to have not broken us out sooner. I loved my work as a scientist and when I was offered a job at the Royal Research Facility I could not believe my luck and whenever things went on that stretched outside my comfort zone I ignored it or justified it. Now that I think back I closed my eyes and ears to many cruel and immoral things, but when I was put into a team to research of human mutation I am ashamed to say that I lived with blinders on.
We took in many young women with the best health and physique to further our goal, they did not survive to see what horrible creatures they gave birth to thankfully. But Coaxoch's mother was different, she was like fire, her hair flaming orange against pale skin and her green eyes burned with hate for us, her strength seemed endless, only at times did her fire falter before burning anew.
I started to wonder if keeping such a person locked up was really the right thing to do even in the name of research, the easiest excuse I have is that I became almost brainwashed although the painful truth is that I was scared. Scared of doing the right thing, of loosing my job and perhaps life, scared of taking the responsibilities of a sane human being. But I continued with my duties together with my team, #78H, or Farena as her real name was, had to endure many horrid and simply embarrassing tests and operations.
Eventually we succeeded in creating her pregnancy and her body didn't seem to reject the new DNA ïnjected into the egg in her womb. For once we had a test subject whose body didn't reject the foreign DNA or had to endure a painful pregnancy. Month's flew by and to be on the safe side we removed her child with a c-section, my only good deed then was to subtly push through the decision to let Farena stay with her child, to see how both subjects reacted as I put it in my report.
It was easy to see the child was not human, her small locks were a vibrant blue against a pale skin with a greenish hue, her tongue was long and forked like a reptile and her skin had faint patterns reminiscent of bark. The fragile little girl was simply called #32H407M, perhaps it is easier to handle human experiments if they do not have names or perhaps it is just easier to keep track off. I do not know and perhaps I never will.
Despite her mutated child Farena loved her daughter, it was obvious in her eyes, her voice and her ferocious protection of the small girl. I learned more about her the more nights I spent alone in the lab, she started to open my eyes for the world. She had lived in a town near the ocean, Loax To'och, the scaled people of the forest lived nearby and the sea living merfolk swam in the ocean, she told me she named her girl Coax'och after a friend of hers among the forest people. It was the same world I grew up in and yet I knew so little, Farena managed to show me how grey my view of the world was, how much there was to see.
One day she was gone, moved to another facility they said but I knew deep down she had been disposed of. Her daughter was old enough to take after her mother and they did not want that. My life felt emptier after that but Farena's words had kindled a small flame inside me, it would take many years but it would finally grow.
These memories are what I shared with Coaxoch during her childhood, I wanted Farena to live on in her child and for Coaxoch to know her mother more. Time went by quickly and to our surprise the child grew much quicker than a human should after only five years she were twelve years in both body and mind, we came to the conclusion that the foreign DNA were the cause. In a few more years she looked like a twenty year old, her fiery soul clearly a trait from her mother and I grew more and more certain that this was wrong, maybe my age had something to do with it, after al when you are older death does not provide such a threat any longer.
My chance had come quicker than I would have guessed, guards were sent to a facility to help quell the feelings of war between the forest people and the people at the Science Facility. With few guards I managed to free Coaxoch at night time when most of my colleagues were asleep, I dared not take anything with me for fear of taking too long or being discovered. It was so easy to leave that I feared it was a trick but no armed guards came running, no alarms blared or lights flashed.
Why Coaxoch continues to follow me I can only wonder, she could have left as soon the building vanished from our sight but she stayed. Maybe I provide some sort of safety in a strange world, does she plan to take revenge on me or does she harbour some sort of gratitude despite all I have done? I admit i am afraid to ask her.
She has proven to possess instinctive abilities to hunt and survive, clearly a trait of the scaled Loax To'och, their skills are widely known across the world. From what I have seen of them Coaxoch is very similar to them although she looks very much like her mother. She is shorter and slimmer than the Loax To'och but she has their skin colour and texture and their pointed ears, although her hair is clearly from the people of the sea she may be accepted into the forest clans. That is my hope at least, that she can be accepted and given the chance to a normal life despite her early life.
I may not live to see her happy once more, I spent more years covering in fear behind my work than I care to admit, now I watch this beautiful young girl and now I did something right in a life full of mistakes. Perhaps this is how grandparents feel about their grandchildren? Feelings of pride and hope over a new generation, I may not be related to her and she may loathe me as much as I loathe myself but this old heart thinks for itself.
Now we have spent too much time resting, we have to continue onwards, despite how long we have come I fear it is not long enough. Now I have put my sins to paper at last, after so many years they stare back at me. This little diary of sorts also have all my memories and interactions with both Farena and Coaxoch written down, she may find strength in her mother's words as I found my strength in them.
Tulen Pindureh
