Excuse Me Sir, Do You Have a Moment to Speak About Death? (mahigan & Peter Crimsonblood)

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  1. “You,” the voice whispered, “are fucking Death. That’s right. C’mon, c’mon! Take it in. You. Are. Death. The big bad God of the Underworld. Head honcho of souls, the big cheese of Hell. Mortals will grovel at your feet when you rip their souls outta their fu-“

    “Hey. Are you listening to me? You have a contract to fulfill you know.”

    Her prose interrupted, the shadowy figures exchanged glances in the depths of Hell. On one side of the teller window sat Disnorakiin, otherwise known as “Jobman John”. His eyes were fading stars, their light diminished and dull, hanging in the shadows he called his face. His pose spoke of one who’d seen this pep talk routine many times over. On the other side stood Death Agent #7302, who called herself “Sahvozdosil”, but was more commonly known as Alice. Her eyes shone bright like newborn suns, ready to enact burning righteous vengeance on the living. Or so she said, there were many new Death Agents who let it get to their heads.

    Luckily for the humans, Death himself was in control of their lives. He chose carefully who to kill, running a program on Skullscript which factored in many different aspects of human life. This year’s Death did anyway – it was just a title granted to their elected leader. Some years a particularly bloodthirsty soul would be elected as Death, heralding the doom of millions on the Overworld. Others, a delicate hearted soul would kill no one. The current Death was a systematic worker and a dork but his coding kept the balance between souls and people in check. Anyway, the peoples’ names were printed out and sent to “Jobman John”, who’d then hand them out to the Death Agents. The Death Agents were tasked with retrieving their souls.


    “There are seven thousand, three hundred and one other Death Agents who’d be perfectly happy to take this job.”


    “So shut up, or you won’t get it!”

    “Oh my god. God as in Death. President, King, Mister Death. I am so sorry. Will not happen again. So can I have the contract, pretty please with a cherry on top?”

    “… Take it and get outta here.”

    “Yay! You’re a sweetie, John.”

    Alice snatched the burnt piece of paper that came flying out of the teller’s window before hurriedly floating away through the depths of Hell. “Bitch.” She snarled once she was sure she was out of his hearing, a good block or two away. A bit excessive perhaps but rumor had it that Jobman John’s ears were as sharp as obsidian blades.

    For what mortals had to say about Hell it was actually a very cozy nook. Hot at times maybe, but then again the denizens above lived in places such as Phoenix, Arizona. They were hypocrites to write such slander about the Underworld. Some things they got right about it though, such as the torture going on (souls that hated their jobs on Earth tended to hate their jobs here more), “hellish” wails (they could blame the screamo souls for that one), and Nine Circles of Hell (a very popular band name as well as being the different districts).

    Alice considered herself lucky really. Hell was as boring as it could be. The jobs you got were identical to the ones you had when you were alive. There were no pets in Hell as far as Alice was concerned, as all dogs went to Heaven and cats being a rare occurrence, having nine lives. They still had to pay, eat, shit, piss and sleep – though it was more of a habit thing. Being souls, technically they needed none of that but without them they’d have nothing more to do besides float around and lament their loneliness to the world.

    She flew up to the Great Latch, the portal between the two worlds and flashed her contract ticket to the operator. In monotone he spoke. “Welcome to the Great Latch, the portal between the Under and Overworld. Please keep in mind that-“

    “Uh, hello? Death Agent here.”

    He blinked for a few seconds before continuing his introduction.

    “That contact between humans and souls are strictly prohibited under Law #24. Furthermore-“


    “If found guilty of frater-“

    With a loud sigh, Alice pushed herself through the barrier and typed in the combo needed to unlock the Great Latch. She’d only been a Death Agent for three contracts but the patience needed to withstand his robotic speech was impossible. In a flash of lights, the portal dramatically began humming and shimmering with energy. The human world could be seen faintly in the distance and Alice took a deep breath before entering, his speech still going on behind her. Hell sucked.


    Alice took in a deep breath of Overworld air before remembering to take her human form. Limiting, but useful to prevent panic. In a few uncomfortable moments her shadowy form morphed and shifted to form a womanly shape standing 5’8. Her now long, blonde locks brushed her back and she put on an endearing smile before becoming visible and taking in the scene around her. The Death Agent was met with the stares of shocked, some leering, of the passer byes around her – she’d forgotten to summon clothes again. In a flash Alice zipped away to a nearby alley, their laughter echoing in her ears.

    After her little mishap and a tank top, jeans, socks and shoes later, she finally opened up the contract crumpled in her left hand. Upon the singed paper was written her victim’s information: Peter, a twenty year old man… and that was it. Alice frowned. Jobman John must’ve had sharper ears than she’d thought – he was renowned for making trouble making Death Agents’ jobs harder. Luckily, all Death Agents had an affinity for sensing their victim’s souls but without more information, the job would be infinitely harder. “I HATE YOU JOHN!"

    Stronger Death Agents were able to call upon their powers of the Underworld to help them become invisible for long periods of time, fly, teleport to the shadows of the world but for Alice, a newbie, she had the power of walking and tracking down this soul whose presence she could barely feeling tugging on her mental compass. It’d take days unless she bumped into him but the chances of that happening were nearly zero, wasn't it?
  2. "Buzzz..buzzz" was the first thing Peter's sense of hearing got acquainted to that morning. "Oh maaan, but i just got up yesterday!" He said releasing a sigh as he slammed the buzzing alarm clock off. Peter wasn't really a morning person, nor was he a night person for that matter. He was a lazy, always bored man whose only fear was losing his bed. He looked at the time on his watch with his usual sleepy, half-closed eyes and realized he was late for work. He had only recently gotten his job as a free lance photographer at some news agency whose name he didn't even bother to remember. He hated this whole "working" business but he had to do it since photography was pretty much the only thing he excelled at. " I really hope i can avoid getting my eardrum punctured by my bitchy noisy boss today...ugh.. i hate her squeaky voice!" He said angrily as he got dressed, referring to the woman in charge of the pictures he takes.
    #2 Uchiha Obito, Aug 17, 2014
    Last edited: Aug 17, 2014
  3. "Peter... Male... Twenty..."

    An eternity later, Alice's luck hadn't changed in the slightest. Her human feet tingled as if a thousand burning needles had lodged their way into them while her legs felt as if she were dragging them through thick mud. It was the price she paid for flight in the Underworld. Another thing that the mortals said was true: "Never skip leg day". As she walked through the streets of the city (which she didn't know the name of; Alice could barely remember the district names of Hell) she could feel the tugging of her victim's soul fade in and out constantly. It was driving her insane. It was comparable to a game of Hot and Cold with between a deaf person and a mute.

    "Peter... Male... Twenty..."

    It was a chant now that grew in intensity, almost as if she were reciting a curse. As her voice retained more and more of her Underworld tone, she caught the gaze of more and more pedestrians eventually causing one to ask her quite firmly, "What the fuck is wrong with you?" Alice turned her head slowly to look at the man next to her. Homeless, by the look of him. Either that or a rich man with a tweaked sense of modern fashion.

    "Peter... Male... Twe-"

    "Bitch possessed!"

    "NTY...! PE- kuh!-"

    Evidently the denizens of the mortal plane had less patience for the seemingly deranged. Her cheek felt numb, before it started stinging. Strange... as a Death Agent Alice was supposed to have enhanced durability compared to these flesh bags. It signalled a worrying state, considering how weak her human form already was. Feeling confused, she hurriedly walked away from her assailant and deeper into the city.

    As her feet pounded away on the pavement the Death Agent focused all of her energy on tracing the pull of Peter's soul. Whatever was at work here she didn't like and the sooner his soul was harvested the sooner she could return to Hell. After a few wrong turns Alice came to a stop in front of a seedy looking apartment. His soul was here, if Alice wasn't mistaken.
  4. He put on his usual black hoodie and a pair of rugged pants which blended in nicely with his black wavy hair that looked like a stack of cotton candy in the morning. He was the kind of guy who never really bothered to take care of his appearance despite being neat, and reeking of good scent most of the time. Leaving his apartment, he looked at a picture that caused him to feel pain every time he left or entered his place of residence. It was a picture of a curly haired girl who wrapped her arms around him. "I wonder if you're feeling alone right now.." he said with an almost pained tone as tears ran down his face. No one really knew his story, but all his acquaintances and friends, which weren't really that numerous , were aware that something tragic had happened in his past.

    He left the building a minute later, took out his camera and began snapping. Looking into the lens, he saw a beautiful blonde girl standing across from him. His eyes widened with shock at how much she resembled the girl in the picture back at his apartment, the only difference being her hair color. "Oh..my..God." he uttered as he raped the camera button saving about 20 pictures.
  5. Alice rocked back and forth on her heels. The tugging was growing stronger by the minute, drowning out every other emotion she held for the moment. Despite her numerous bloodthirsty pep talks her breath began to hitch and her heartbeats began to thump faster. Tearing out someone's soul was something she felt she could never get enough of. In some ways, it was a very intimate matter to take a life. Of course, there was the matter of finding the right person behind the many doors of the apartment. She craned her neck upwards. It'd take her a long time considering how low her power was running... and it seemed to be draining by the minute. She frowned before reaching to open the door, only to be met with a series of blinding flashes.

    Click click click click click.

    "Ouch fuck!"

    Her human eyes, accustomed to the dark depths of Hell were overwhelmed by the sudden bright lights. Alice brought up her hands out of instinct, shielding her eyes and rubbing her knuckles into them until she could see again. She warily lowered her hands once they stopped and glared at the perpetrator. He stood a bit taller than her, his somewhat disheveled appearance being salvaged by his looks. He smelled nice, for a human. Different from the usual brimstone scent of Hell. What caught her attention most however, was the fact that her "soul sensors" so to speak were flying off the charts. Alice was certain that this man was her assigned victim. To be entirely sure though, she decided to ask him a simple yes or no question. Death Agents could be fired, even stripped of their powers, if they brought in the wrong soul.

    "Are you Peter?"
  6. He was too caught up in his attempts at getting the right angles, that he didn't notice her approaching him. He thought he was merely zooming in, but her gentle, familiar tone of voice, snapped him out of his photographic trance. He hung his camera by a strap around his neck and glanced at her "Why yes i am!" he answered playfully and wore a guilty smile on his face. "Uhhh..hehe..I am truly sorry for taking pictures of you without your consent. It's just that i have been assigned to do this stupid job..". He then blushed slightly and looked away.
    #6 Uchiha Obito, Aug 19, 2014
    Last edited: Aug 19, 2014
  7. Somehow Alice just didn't buy his apology. It could've been his guilty grin, his nonchalant tone or the small blush creeping across his cheeks. However the Death Agent figured it wouldn't matter in the slightest - as a soul she'd never see him again. Hopefully. Hell was a large place after all. "Assigned to a job, huh?" She cooed before filling her palms with soul wrenching magics. "I totally feel you. I've been assigned a job as well... only not as stupid as yours. I like it a lot actually." The girl rambled on and on as her hands began to shimmer faintly. It was taking way longer than usual to charge up her powers. Alice guessed it'd take a few more moments so staying true to her dramatic self, she decided to end the small talk with an "intimidating" sentence. "You know, I've never killed a photographer before."
  8. He could notice her cold personality and lost interest in her immediately . He had always had the gift of figuring out people the minute he talked to them, but what really puzzled him was the sudden crazy talk and her strange movements. "Kill me? well that isn't very nice. What did i do to you?" He asked, unaware of what she had in store for him. He didn't really take her seriously, since he encounters people like her with mental issues almost daily, but for some reason, she sent shivers down his spine and he felt unsafe. He then took a few steps back and attempted to walk off "Oookayy..i guess i'll be going now" he said almost as if he were asking for her permission to leave.
    #8 Uchiha Obito, Aug 19, 2014
    Last edited: Aug 21, 2014
  9. "Oh absolutely nothing at all. Your name just happened to come up." She smiled sweetly. This wasn't going the way she planned it to. Normally Alice would've been home bound by now, dragging a soul behind her. Actually talking to her victim beforehand was pulling at her heartstrings, making her feel slightly guilty. "Don't look at me. Blame Death. Only he's not really Death, as in the whole leave your life behind kinda thing, he's just a dorky dude who made this whole program to like keep you mortals in check ch'yea?" She shot out both her hands and grabbed onto his shoulders, attempting to pull him back. "You think I'm crazy, don't you? Well fuck you man! I never asked to kill you - you're kinda cute - it's just my job! Don't worry so much! You'll understand - seeya in Hell!" With that, Alice primed her powers and struck him, palms first hard on the chest. What normally would happen would be for his soul to push out. However in this instance, nothing happened. Alice remained pushing on his chest, eyes closed. It would be likely for Peter to feel some sort of energy rush into him, an unearthliness hard to describe.
  10. " Do you really think a guy like me gives a fuck about his life?" He asked looking at her with cold, almost dead eyes. He could feel something strange happening to his body..no it was something else, something he couldn't explain. His body was fine, it's what's inside that was being rattled. Images from his past came surging through his head and played before his eyes. It was similar to that sensation you have while watching a movie at the theaters, only this time, his mind was the projector. "See me in hell? baby i already am in hell." He continued as his tone changed. It wasn't playful and kiddish anymore and changed into a completely confident and more mature tone.
    #10 Uchiha Obito, Aug 19, 2014
    Last edited: Aug 19, 2014
  11. "Ugh... what happened?"

    Alice was pushing as hard as she could but instead of the feeling of relief as she reverted back into her deathly form all she felt was Peter's flesh. Unmoving. Soul intact. She blinked rapidly, each flutter of her eyelids taking chunks out of her energy. She looked up slowly to spy the unamused man giving her a stone cold look. "That... wasn't supposed to happen. Are you dead?" The sudden blare of a car horn, the owner of which sped away down the street, told her the truth. "I'm still here? You're not dead. And I'm on Earth. What the fuck." Alice reared back before slamming both her hands into Peter again, attempting to force out his soul. Only this time, things were dreadfully off.

    First off, her attunement with the Underworld had disappeared without a trace. Her memories remained but she couldn't sense anything anymore. Secondly, the usual soul wrenching magic she used seemed to have been sapped away - not a single drop remained. Alice stumbled backwards and promptly fell on her ass. Without her former strength she was like a toddler learning how to walk. Her human form felt clumsy and heavy and she felt as if she couldn't breath. "Oh my god. No. No way this is happening." She muttered to herself, eyes frantically spinning around. Although her mind was clouded with confusion and shock, one thing was for certain. Ever since she'd been assigned to this contract, her powers had been waning. Somehow this man, Peter, was involved in this.

    "What did you do to me?!"
  12. His eyes began to burn and turned completely black. His pupils , disappeared. His skin began to crumble and heal, until it reached a stable state. a state in which he felt really powerful, he felt like he could fuck this whole world up, and no one would be able to harm him. "I could ask you the same thing lady. All i had planned to do today was finish work, eat lunch, and sleep the the rest of the fucking day off. But no, you had to show up and mess with my plans. And this! what is this? what is up with my eyes... my skin is crawling, and i have this unfathomable thirst,, i wanna kill someone!" He said with a devilish smile on his face and tightened his fists. " Get up.. i don't know who you are, or what you did to me, but you have some explaining to do." He said to the now weakened girl after reaching out his hand for her.
  13. Alice mouthed a curse as she began to realize what was happening here. From his symptoms, the former Death Agent guessed that for some reason, Peter had taken her powers. It was a more dangerous situation than she was prepared for - at his current state, who knew what he could do? For all Alice knew Peter would be ripping out the souls of everyone he met. Which wouldn't do, of course. She gulped before accepting his hand, pulling herself up. "Okay well, long story short, you just took my job. I'll explain it to you more in detail - in private. Do you have a room in this big fancy building of yours?" Alice practically vibrated on spot; she was eager to usher him out of sight. If for whatever reason his condition worsened she was sure the mortals would panic.
  14. Some sort of black steam surrounded his body. Almost as if he were being renewed "Yeah...I have an apartment upstairs." He answered while panting. He walked slowly and hazily, since he was still not well acquainted with this new state of his. "Fuck, i can't even walk properly". It wasn't a very unfamiliar sensation, since he was a heavy drinker and knew very well what it's like to be wasted and dizzy. Seconds later, his head began to stabilize and his vision was clear. He opened the door to the building and pushed the buttons on the elevator.
    #14 Uchiha Obito, Aug 20, 2014
    Last edited: Aug 20, 2014
  15. "This is not good." Alice muttered to herself. "Understatement of the year, Alice." She had to laugh at the absurdity of the situation, it helped deal with the shock. As far as she knew this had never happened in the history of Hell. She tried helping support the man through the doorway but in her current state they ended up looking like a couple of drunks. She stifled a maniacal giggle at his expletive filled statement. "That makes two of us. Seriously, how do you humans even walk ar- oop!" Alice stretched as high as she could, trying to shield Peter's form from the curious stares of the morning shift workers heading out.

    Luckily their human minds came to the most logical solution - that the black steam was some foreign type of tobacco smoke. Garnering glares and even a stern "No smoking inside!" from the burnt out looking desk employee, Alice followed Peter to the elevator. As they waited for the familiar ding! and psssh of the doors, she glanced curiously at her new companion. "How are you feeling, fucko? I hope you're getting ready to say sorry for taking my powers." She hissed before erupting in an explosive bout of chuckles. It was a backwards sort of morning which was diddling with her mood, changing from mad to amused to curious to happy all in seconds.
  16. "Steal your powers? lady, I'm too lazy to even consider that. Assuming that i know what these powers are...Anyway, thanks, i feel slightly better now." He answered giving her a welcoming smile and tried to puff away the steam. Strangely enough, and for some inexplicable reason, Peter liked her childish chuckles, they were similar to those of the murderous teenage girls in his horror movie collection, and he couldn't help but smile back at them. " *Sigh* this piece of junk never fails to keep me wait." he said complaining about the elevator and looked at the mysterious female that had just entered his life.

    A few seconds later, the elevator arrived and he went in . He didn't really bother to let her go in first, since he didn't believe in the saying Ladies first. " What are you waiting for? Get in!" He said to her.
    #16 Uchiha Obito, Aug 20, 2014
    Last edited: Aug 21, 2014
  17. Alice hopped in unsteadily after him. It was the first time she'd been on an elevator since God knew when and with her current state she didn't like the risk of trying new things. She waved away some of the smoke from her head and watched as the elevator doors closed. "Well, c'mon then. Take me to your room so I can try to make sense out of all this." She spoke before pulling out the worn piece of paper - her contract. Alice straightened out the paper before reading it again. Peter, Age Twenty, Male. A small growl emanated from her throat before she closed her eyes, counted to ten and took another peek. Peter, Age Twenty, Male was still printed on the paper, all twenty black characters taunting her. "I don't understand... here, take a look at this. It's you on this paper, isn't it?" As a Death Agent he'd probably feel some sort of personal connection to it, confirming his previous victim status.
  18. He felt an intense headache the minute he touched the piece of worn out paper and closed his eyes in pain. When he reopened them and looked at the paper, he was shocked! "I..it's..It's me..I can see myself!" he uttered. To him the paper had turned into a mirror. It was still a stupid piece of paper, but he could clearly see his reflection in it. "I really don't understand what is happening, but damn i have never noticed how ugly my hair looked!" he gave a frantic giggle and handed the paper back to her.
    #18 Uchiha Obito, Aug 22, 2014
    Last edited: Aug 22, 2014
  19. Alice popped her head curiously over his arm, to see what he was describing. To her disappointment, all she could see were the black letters from earlier. It confirmed her lost powers, much to her chagrin. "Goddamn. If this is a trick John's pulled on me... here, let me help ya with that." She snatched the paper from his hand, tucking it away into her pocket before clumsily running her fingers through his hair a couple of times. "Souls have it so much easier," she muttered, "they can just... form their hair differently. If that makes any sense, which I'm getting the vibe that it doesn't." Luckily, the ding of the elevator stopped her train of thought as the doors opened. "Like to live up high, eh? Well c'mon then. Don't you mortals consider it rude to keep a lady waiting? Only that our states of mortality are like, totally reversed right now. But just you wait, bucko! This isn't permanent."
  20. He looked up at her fingers and smiled. It was a familiar sensation, to have his hair played with by a pretty lady, only this time they weren't his girlfriend's fingers, which caused him to feel an immense amount of pain in his chest again. He shook off the bad memories and looked back at the girl. " You know, bringing a girl up to my room this early in the morning wasn't a part of today's agenda." he said jokingly and then paused for a second. "S..states of mortality? What do you mean?" He got out of the elevator and held her hand "Watch your step, there's a gap between the elevator and this side" he said loudly and pulled her towards him with intense force...this power was something he had never expected to have. There was only a one inch space between them when he pulled her. She was so close to him that he felt the hair on his arms stand up. Her scent was so oddly alluring, even though it was merely the smell of iron and smoke, the kind of smoke that emits when roasting marshmallows.
    #20 Uchiha Obito, Aug 24, 2014
    Last edited: Aug 24, 2014
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