A while back, I went to counselling. For... reasons. During the course of it, I was asked to speak to a member of staff who specialised in working with people who have autism. Long story short, I took a test, I spent time with that staff member, and I attended some meetings. And, in her opinion, there's a strong chance that I've got autism. I've no reason to dispute her claims, given that she works with autistic people as a job, and I've seen the signs as well. Thing is, I haven't gotten a diagnosis yet. It's not that it'd be particularly difficult - I just have to speak to my local GP, and I just have to follow whatever instructions come next. The problem's in whether I should get one or not. See, if I do get one, and it turns out I do have autism, I can get support from professionals and assistance wherever possible. I'll have access to resources that could possibly make it seem like I don't have it at all. Problem is, if I do have it, that goes on records. People know about that. Not everybody, mind, but employers and such'll know. And it doesn't matter how little it affects me, a condition's a condition. On the other hand, if I keep it hidden, I can just live like I always have. Keeping everything secret, just pretending to be a bit odd. And maybe I just am. Maybe it's not autism, and I'm just weird like that. But what if it isn't? Nobody has to know. Word may get out if I'm diagnosed. I don't know how, but it could. But if I just carry on like normal, I could just blend into the crowd. I want closure, but at the same time, the closure could be a massive roadblock. Or maybe I'm over-complicating things, or worrying too much. I don't know, I just want to know if I should get tested or not.