Closure

[PlayingMonster]

It took him a while to walk to the bar. Every step he took, he was looking for her. His hands were in his pockets, one curled around the box of medication. The slightly cool air made him feel a little better. But he still ached slightly, and despite the solid eleven hours sleep or whatever, he felt like he needed to sleep. A nap that wasn't also a fix was probably what he needed, but that wasn't going to happen. He'd just make sure that he took the right amount of pills the next time he took them.

As he neared the bar, he spotted a girl going in. He vaguely recognised her, but wasn't going to go in after her. Instead, he waited across the road, leaning against a lamppost. He didn't know how long he was waiting, but eventually, she re-emerged. He crossed the street and grinned bashfully at her. "Hi. I'm sorry about last night, but-" He looked at her properly and, with a shock, realised why she was so familiar. "Oh my god- I met you in the cafe yesterday, didn't I? Your friend stood you up. Aolin, wasn't it?" He exclaimed. He ran a hand through his hair as his mind put two and two together. "That explains why I was sure I met you last night!"

 

[PureKor]

Aolin just crossed the street, now at just a few feet away by the bar when a familiar voice came from behind.

The hands inside her pockets tighten, at the words she just heard. It was Him. All along.
The guy from the coffee shop.
Shot.

How come she didn't recognise him last night? And now he knew about her secret. Dancing half naked and singing for a few bucks. Bonus the occasionally cocaine, just to keep her alive somehow.

Ailing gulped hard, now standing in front of the door, pulling the hat lower on her face.

" I.. Just.. Don't say anything anymore! Judge me all you want.. I am sorry for your sandwich!"

Aolin turn to look at his face, with teary eyes and trying to breathe normally in front of him.
Why from all the people, it had to be Him to recognise her?

The racing heart didn't settled for a minute, sensation like a sharp razor cutting her open, filled her entire body.

" Please..we can't talk. It's not a good time right now. I am not ready for this .. I am sorry !"

And with that she brushed passed him, going inside the pub as the heavy door shut behind her. Aolin held a hand at her chest, taking the hat off with her legs now rushing to the bar.

She simply nodded at the bartender, which was cleaning that time so he would give her a drink.
She had been careless. Indeed shit happens even to the best of us.

After a few minutes, Aolin had already plenty drinks, but kept thinking at Alex. From behind her, the manager came by and slid his hand around her. He helped her to come with him in he back office.

" Please.. I need my money. I will get kicked out the apartment if I don't pay the rent in three days..
I've done all you wanted me to.."

Aolin explained to the old man, but soon her eyes darted at the front table. The pure crystals, shinning under her eyes were like drawing her to them. A closer look. A single touch. An ecstasy feeling.
​

 

[PlayingMonster]

She rushed inside, leaving Alex standing there. He swallowed. He couldn't shake the memory of kissing her. He had only just met her but oh god, it had felt so right. For a few minutes, he'd just completely forgotten about his addiction, about the panic attacks, about how he was constantly afraid of everything. She had been all he could think about. And she still was. His hand uncurled from the box of pills. He didn't give a shit about what she did. He took a deep breath and went into the bar.

The bartender narrowed his eyes at him as he went in. "We're not strictly open for business, son." He said. Alex shrugged, forcing a smile on his face. "I'ma friendof Aolin's." The bartender raised his eyebrows. "You were here last night, right?" Alex nodded. The bartender shook his head. "Fine. Don't know how long she's going to be though." Alex shrugged, climbing up onto a bar stool. "That's cool. I'll wait."

 

[PureKor]

A tiny lump begun to take shape at her throat, just by looking at the white powder before her eyes.
Soon, she shook away the thought and slammed her hands onto his desk.

" This stuff won't help me paying my rent.. I need the money. Or I am leaving!"

Aolin was upset, but what other choice she had considering the situation in that moment.? Not very well.
The manager sighed deeply, taking out a few dollar notes, but keeping them in his hands.

" An entire week of shows, striptease including and it's all Yours. Plus the tips you get, it's yours. Now.. This is your choice.
Tonight at 7. You can leave.."

He simply said to her, turning his back with a laugh.

Aolin for betrayed, find it hard to breathe as she stood up. She covered her head with the sports hat, clenching her hands together before leaving his office.

There was no turning back. No other choice. As considered her past, nobody will hire her except the pubs.

However, she reach where the bar was and grabbed a seat holding her head down, banging it a few times at the Woden bar edge.
Aolin didn't notice for the moment that Alex was sitting next to her body.

" Mike, please.. Give me a bottle of tequila and some lemons. It's going to be a hard week .."

Asking the bartender, without lifting her head, just sighing deeply with each breath taken.
​

 

[PlayingMonster]

Alex didn't say anything as she sat beside him and ordered a drink. "Just give me a glass." He said, without looking at her. "I'd be a bad friend if I let you drink all that by yourself. And after last night, I'd like to be more than your friend." He poured himself a shot of tequila and drained it. "Tell you what. A secret for a secret. I know about this, so..." He sighed. "I was kidnapped just over a year ago. Attacked on my way home from school. I was held captive for ten days. Judging by the injuries I had when I was found, the doctors thought I'd been badly beaten only a day or two before that. Three cracked ribs, a concussion, a broken wrist, and more bruised skin than untouched skin. But he had me drugged so much, I hadn't even woken up with that. The police discovered cyanide where he was keeping me, and figured that if they hadn't found me when they had, I'd have been dead in a day."

He poured himself another shot and drained it, grimacing as it burned. "We all have our secrets. That's mine. I still look over my shoulder when I'm alone." That was a huge understatement, but he wasn't going to bare his soul out for this girl. He didn't want to frighten her off. "But last night, I didn't. You were all I could think about... And you were one of the first things I thought about when I woke up this morning. I had to come find you. I think you're beautiful, and talented, and I don't care that you were half-naked on that stage. I don't care about what you do." His voice lowered a fraction as he stared at the glass in his hand. "I don't deserve to judge anyone."

 

[PureKor]

Aolin listened. Listen some more. Each word of his came like a gunshot, piercing through her soul.
Kidnapping? Drugs? Holy Molly.
And she thought she had it bad enough.

Ailing pour a shot for herself and quickly threw it down the throat. Banging the empty glass onto the bar. She turn her face at Alex.

" I really am sorry to hear that.. I don't even know how you managed to survive that.. I guess you're stronger that others.."

She added with a faint smile, before grabbing the bottle and the empty shot glasses. Standing up, Aolin's hand reach for his still trembling from the feat which came along with it.

" Let's go outside.. In the back. We can climb onto the roof."

And with that , her body moved towards the door waiting for him to fallow. After few minutes, they were going up a ladder and sat down on some improvised boxes.

" I am a mess, Alex.. Uhmm.. And hell to punish me, but I never heard someone to say they don't care what I do for a living. It's not even funny.
I can't pay my rent, I'll end up in the streets.
Bonus, I dance and song half naked for a few bucks and a bag of 5grams of crystals.

My life is beyond perfect right now.. How can a person like you, Still want to be with a screwed up having an awful addiction?"

Ailing tried to explain to Alex, filling the tiny glasses with the tequila, when her eyes gazed at the sky for a moment.
For some reason, she did felt rather comfortable around him.
Why she couldn't be strong enough to confront her fears?

Damn you, feelings.


​

 

[PlayingMonster]

He followed her and climbed onto the roof sitting down beside her. He shook his head at her story. "How can someone like me want to be with someone like you?" He laughed a little bitterly. "You say that like you think I'm a perfect person. I'm not. I mightn't have to dance for drugs and enough money to pay the rent, but I'm..." He could feel the words on his tongue. I'm dependent on anxiety drugs and sleeping pills. If I don't take the anxiety pills, I'll have a panic attack bad enough to send me to hospital. If I don't take the sleeping pills, I go back into withdrawal, which makes my anxiety even worse. He sighed and swallowed a shot. "I'm a screw up. But why would someone like me want to be with you?" He made sure it didn't sound cruel in any way. He made sure that she knew he was going to explain.

He stared at the sky. "You know when you're a kid, and you start school, or you move schools, or a new kid moves in. And you see this one person and you know that you've got to be friends with that person. I saw you in the cafe and I was like 'I have to talk to her.' And then I saw you at the bar last night and it was like this inexplicable feeling. Like I had to talk to you. And then I had to kiss you. And as soon as I woke up this morning, I had to find you. It's like you're a drug, and I'm constantly hungering for fixes. I don't know you well enough to say what it is about you." He looked over at her. "But I know that I need as many fixes of you as possible."

This time, he knew exactly what he was doing as he leaned in and gently pressed his lips to hers.

 

[PureKor]

Aolin took another tequila shot listening his words carefully. Most definitely, didn't want to ruin the start of this -relationship-.
She could not even remember the last relationship she had, more than just a few drinks and a few drug lines splattered across the table.

A small breeze passed by, with her hair moving around, and her hands just under her knees. Her heart begun to skip faster beats.
She was like a drug?
Heck.

He was something beyond that word. More like air. Something definitely was going on, quite not self explanatory about her own feelings towards this boy.
Aolin just then her head to look at Alex, but her unspoken words for cut of at the feeling of his lips on hers. Again. One more time.

The heat spreading like a disease inside of her, goosebumps crossing down her spines until her toes.
He was so intoxicating.

Aolin just give herself in in the moment.

​

 

[PlayingMonster]

He could taste the tequila on her lips, but he didn't care. This was a different kind of fire, one that warmed his body. This was better than any drug. This was better than falling asleep feeling perfectly safe because he had just got his fix. One hand went to her waist, and the other to her hair. He pulled her in closer, so he could feel as much of her body against his. He'd been on dates before, but had never felt anything like this.

He pulled away and looked her straight in the eyes. "We''ll look out for each other." And he pressed his lips to hers again, putting both hands on her waist this time. When they were sitting down, they were at the same level. He just wanted to freeze time, right here, right now. Before his body started hungering for the drugs again.

 

[PureKor]

Aolin smiled briefly between the sweet kisses. Indeed it felt something different into the air.
A sensation more different than the butterflies in your stomach. It was more like the entire zoo was kept prisoner in her stomach.

Another warm wave erupted from her heart, passing through her veins and spreading faster with each time he'd kiss her.

For a moment, Aolin catch her breath when he spoke again. His voice echoing in her mind and everything else seemed like white noise around them.
Most definitely she couldn't ignore this feeling.

" Are you.. sure we can do that? It's complicated though.. The last thing I wanna do is to make things worse.. But the thing is, that I like you. A Lot. More than tequila."

Aolin trying to make a joke behind the confession words for Alex. She could swear that her heart will pop out of her chest any minute.
As now her eyes gazed at him, touching his forearms tensed, yet her fingertips felt rather shaking and numb in the same time.

Weird indeed.
Only him could make her feel Alive. In all this madness.
​

 

[PlayingMonster]

He pulled away from her and smiled. "I like you too. And I know we can make it work." He kissed her once again, before taking her hand and pulling her to her feet. "Let's do something. Let's go for a walk in the park. Let's go do something that couples always do. I want to spend as much time with you as possible, and kissing is great, but we're not learning much about each other this way." He laughed a little, before climbing down off the roof.

"So, what do you want to do? Go for a walk and get ice cream? I honestly don't care, once I get to spend time with you."

 

[PureKor]

Aolin chuckled at his words about what normal couples would do. She fallowed him down the ladder, jumping on her feet before looking at him.

" I guess we could go for hotdogs instead.. I don't like ice cream much.
Besides I can't afford to pay nothing yet, so we will have to steal them. I know the perfect guy.!"

With a smile, Aolin opened the door at the pub, giving him a sigh to fallow her. They went inside the bar, now reaching outside on the street.

" I have to come back at work at 7 tonight or I won't get paid.. So that gives us almost 3 hours to hang about.
Come. This way, Romeo!"


At the impulse, Aolin took his hand and piles him after her to get at the other side of the road. She let her hair to fall down her back, swinging in the wind.

This day had to her better.
Alex was with her.

​

 

[PlayingMonster]

He laughed as she took his hand and pulled him across the road. "No, we're not stealing them. I'll pay." He insisted, planting his feet on the pavement. "You're going to pay the rent on your flat, then you're going to make sure you have enough money for food. Then you can pay me back." He told her, idly stroking the back of her hand with his thumb as they walked towards the park. "I don't want you getting in trouble with the law." He said.

They found a vendor selling hot dogs, and he walked up to them. "Two, please." He handed over the cash, and then gave one to her. "So. Little facts about yourself. Your favourite colour. Your first pet. Stuff like that."

 

[PureKor]

Aolin felt a bit ashamed for the fact of not being able to afford a damn hot dog.

After minutes of walking, they finally reach the hot dogs place. She slowly took hers , with a smile at Alex before taking the first bite.
It was so fulfilling.

Aolin pointed at the park just a few feet away, when she started to jump around in circles like a kid, going that way.

" My colour is red.. No pets. I like my coffee with two sugars and totally hate the typical of judgemental stereotype of people.. Alone with the people who don't apologise when they bump into you at the subway..

You?"

Ailing stopping for a moment, with her eyes at him and took another bite from the hot dog, all happy like.
He sweater falling More on the side, the tattoo was rather revealing to the naked eye.


" I'll pay you this week. That's a promise.. Alex."
​

 

[PlayingMonster]

He laughed as she clearly got excited. She listened to him talk as he ate his hot dog and grinned. "Okay. My favourite colour is green. I had a hamster as a kid but it died. I always loved to play with my uncle's dog, though. I don't drink coffee, but I do stick to the British stereotype of drinking tea. One sugar and a dash of milk. I cannot stand hospitals. Doctor's surgeries are bad, but bearable. I hate people who talk shit about things they don't know a damn thing about."

He wrapped an arm around her almost instinctively. "Don't worry about it. Take care of yourself first."

 

[PureKor]

Aolin give him a reassuring smile, while they walked towards the not so crowded park.
The wind blow again, rather strongly this time and made her hair bun to loosen up, as the hair bubble fell down.

Her long hair now swinging across her face, with her hand briefly touching his waist. Still had this fearful feeling that everything she'd touched, it will shatter in pieces. Like every time she was happy, shit happened and everything will collapse.

" Green is for old people, Alex! I say that navy blue suits you better. Oh, look! There is a flying kite!! That looks awesome!"

Aolin said to Alex, letting go of him and ran towards where the children were playing with the kite.
She stopped for a minute, eyes up to the sky and in total amazement. It's been a while since she saw this type of kite. Somehow, it reminded her of the best friend.

Aolin couldn't help herself from smiling. Deep down she felt happy now. Being there, in the fresh air and with Alex around her.
​

 

[PlayingMonster]

He laughed at her reaction to him telling her his favourite colour. But before he could say anything else, she ran away, fixated on a kite. He watched her, unable to stop himself from smiling. He had thought she was beautiful last night, in makeup and clothes that showed off her body. But now he was seeing that this was when she was most beautiful- when she was happy and smiling. He just watched her for a while, before going over and putting his hand around her waist.

Almost subconsciously, he put his hand to his pocket, checking that the box of pills was still there. And he realised that this wasn't going to last forever. This happiness, this peace- it was only going to last until the cravings kicked in. He still had a few hours, as he was barely after waking up, but they would come. And he'd have to deal with them.

But he was going to make the most out of the time until then. He looked down at her and smiled. Now was all that really mattered. f

 

[PureKor]

Aolin just kept looking at the kids playing with the kite. Couldn't stop herself from grinning all the time.
She almost jumped when he put his hand at her waist.

Slowly she turn her face to look at him, eyes locked on his. Another skipping beat of the heart.
Bathump. Bathump.

Realising now that how close they were actually, her face turning redder. A small lump felt inside her throat.

" Uhm.. Alex. Let's go, sit on the grass over there..! Come on!"

Her voice hoarse for a moment, now turning around and catch one of his fingers with hers, while she walked at a fast peace down the park alley.

" I know this great spot.. It's an oak tree to. Peaceful indeed and you can see the bridge from there as well."

Aolin explain to him, passing some people and then some trees, before getting to step on the grass, heading to the oak tree.
Her hand begun to feel sweaty from the nerves.
Calm down. Breathe.

​

 

[PlayingMonster]

He followed her to the tree, his finger curled around hers. Every brief moment of contact was like an electric shock through his skin. With her, he felt like he had just taken his drugs, but without falling asleep. He sat down by the tree and put his arm around her as she sat beside him pulling her in close. He was very aware of where they touched, and he loved it. It was like nothing else.

He sighed, staring out at the view. "I just wish I could freeze this moment. Right here, right now." He mused. Mostly because he had no cravings. No anxiety. He wanted to just be like this. He wondered... He wondered if he could make it clean. If he took his pills for the last time tonight, would being with her help him get clean. If his cravings for her would overpower the cravings for drugs. She made him feel better than drugs, because the feeling didn't fade. He wasn't about to fall asleep like with the sleeping pills. He was just safe.

 

[PureKor]

Aolin sat down on the grass, luckily it was still sunny outside or else, she'd freeze her butt for good.

Her eyes starring at the sky above, then slowly turning to the view in front of her. At some point, Alex's hand surrounded her body, pulling her even closer to him.

For some reason though , it actually felt comfortable. So, Aolin leaned her head on his shoulder when he spoke. She simply close her eyes inhaling the fresh air.

" Even if we can't freeze time, we still can make it Our Own. Like.. Uhmm, this is our moment in which we don't care about the world and we can Seize the moments."

On a low tone of voice, as afraid of maybe someone else will hear them. Aolin lifted her chin just a bit, to look at Alex's features. Then, she took his hand into hers transferring the heat from her body to him.

Aolin turn around , so she was in her knees in front of him, not letting go of his hands and simply look deeply in his eyes.

" We can seize this moment right now.. It's better than magic."

Her body leaned closer to him, brushing her soft lips against his, her mind went completely blank but yet seemed dizzy to.

" You just have to learn to let it Go.. And the whole world vanishes.."

​