Tegan is making burgers tonight. Let's talk about burgers, and slide casually into chauvinism. Five Guys is my favourite for cheese, and the Wendy's Baconator for bacon. I like it when the toppings become indistinguishable from the meat. This is the problem with most "Gourmet" burgers - it's a just a rubbery piece of shit dressed with aioli. And people buy it. Because they're tools. Also, the practice of putting barbecue sauce on a burger... I kinda like that. And even after all these years, it's hard to eat a burger without fries. I guess that's the world God created. Also, if your burger is so big that you have have to cut it with a knife and re-enact the ending of The Ring just to eat it, you are a cunt. So don't go posting pictures here of giant burgers that some redneck paedophile dreamed up just to get in a magazine. I will disparage you insatiably. Thou shalt not put mayonnaise on a burger, lest thou alsoest be intendering to dippeth yon burger in ketchupe of the tomatis-root.